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We are extremely close to shutting down this thread for the same reasons the PUA thread was shut down. While some of the time this thread contains actual discussion with people asking help and people giving nice advice, it often gets derailed by rubbish that should not be here. The moderation team will be trying to steer this thread in a different direction from now on.
Posts of the following nature are banned:
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Last chance, guys. This thread is for dating advice and sharing dating stories. While gender roles, sociocultural norms, and our biological imperative to reproduce are all tangentially related, these subjects are not the main purpose of the thread. Please AVOID these discussions. If you want to discuss them at length, go to PMs or start a blog. If you disagree with someone's ideologies, state that you disagree with them and why they won't work from a dating standpoint and move on. We will not tolerate any lengthy derailments that aren't directly about dating. |
On September 15 2015 07:22 Zambrah wrote:
Okay, heres my situation, theres this girl I think is cute, she seems really nice so Im thinking of asking her out, heres where Im a little unsure of:
Venue. I ain't gots no monies, and we're both seniors at my school and we've both likely seen Providence to-fuckin'-death.
Time. This is the REALLY hard one, 'cause its our senior year, we have a senior show to prepare for, we have the best class choices and shes ultra hard working, like Im no slouch, but this girl is super talented and super hard working and Im wondering if its gonna be feasible to go on a date with the kind of schedules RISD students who give a fuck keep...
I'll still probably ask, Im sure we can just work together and all of that lovely stuff, but d'y'all have any recommendations? I'm thinking maybe a movie, I can at least afford the tickets...
EDIT: Also, I was thinking of asking her out tonight, but its her birthday and I thought that'd be weird.
Ask her today and say your gift to her is dinner for two. Make it something convenient for her so she can be back home quickly. Everybody has to eat anyway you know.
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On September 15 2015 07:22 Zambrah wrote:Im thinking of asking her out
I ain't gots no monies
Time.
Firstly. + Show Spoiler +
Money shouldn't be an issue, at least if you don't have my problem. There are so many cheap dates out there. Go for a walk for an hour, it's a good way to see if you even like her for starters too, she will definitely have time for that. I myself would think it was super awkward to ask someone out for dinner on the first date. I would barely know her and we're suppose to look each other in the eyes for two hours - fuck that!
I don't think time is that big of an issue anyway, well not if she is interested in you at least. I went on two dates with this one girl, and the second date was in the middle of our exam studying period. She was one of those girls that studies like 8-10 hours per day and she had other activities too. I wanted to go on a date on a wednesday but she already had stuff planned so she moved them around and voila - time made.
edit: Asking her out on her birthday could be a hit or miss. If she a,lready likes you it would probably be her best birthday ever. However if she doesn't.. it will still be a compliment so there is no miss here. You should do it!
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Asking her out for her birthday is a bad plan. Even if someone doesn't have plans to spend birthday with friends/family, they often assume that they will. Asking them out for their birthday therefore puts them in an awkward position: either they really want to go on the date with you, but then fear letting down their friends and family, or they just say no to you. It's generally risky business and not a good idea at all for a first date.
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On September 15 2015 07:52 Zambrah wrote:Show nested quote +On September 15 2015 07:38 Chocolate wrote:
picnic
literally netflix and chill
I don't know how long it takes to get from Providence to areas where there are hiking trails but that could be an option. Don't act like this costs a lot of money. You don't need a ton of gear if you're doing less than 10 miles a day and not even camping outside. Just comfortable shoes, food, and a couple backpacks.
I don't know dude generally if you know someone well enough already the date itself won't really matter and you could probably just hang out in your room or something. Maybe get a couple bottles of cheap wine and play board games? Or watch a movie? But if you don't know her very well that won't be appropriate. In that case I would suggest just going out to eat and then walking around a park or something if you don't like the thing I mentioned earlier.
Don't go out to watch a movie if you can help it though. It's such a boring date due to the lack of conversation The biggest problem is finding the time, our schedules are more or less this: Wake up, liberal arts class at 9:40 til 11:20, lunch, Studio class from 1:10 - 6:10, dinner, do homework for many hours until you absolutely have to sleep ~ 2am. The scheduling is very nuts to deal with, my school's dating atmosphere is really abysmal because of it, but I've done it before and I thiiiink I can make this work if shes not high maintenance (I don't think shes high maintenance). Also neither of us drinks, or does drugs. Also my bank account is at like 17 dollars right now. :D I dunno, I'll default to something simple, there are plenty of good simple options... Well, for now I'll be on the lookout for hiking trail stuff in RI.
I wouldn't worry about it, one date per week is all you need in the first few months anyways, with any girl high maintenance or not, both from practical and attraction standpoint.
Free date ideas: cool parks, hills, in your area. Google Maps is your friend if you live in a city - open maps, look where green shit nearby is where you didn't go to before, put it to google images, see if there's interesting/nice stuff there =voilla, take her there.
Agglomeration websites for activities - I have a couple and there are always free events in Prague where I live.
See if there's a service like that for your area just find some whacky 2hour free workshop, or a charity festival that you will both remember.
Groupon/groupon knock offs - you can find both cheap interesting food and activities where $10 should go a long way. Even if you are rich motherfucker groupon is still great as it points you to things you'd otherwise have no idea about.
As for asking her out - the sooner the better, screw them cheesy lines, just tell her what you think about her and what you want. Pretty sure you miss-understood Acrofales, he wants to ask her out on that day, not to go out with him on her birthday. Asking a girl out should always be either "when are you free to get together" or "do you prefer Wednesday or Friday" anyways
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On September 15 2015 22:10 Acrofales wrote:
Asking her out for her birthday is a bad plan. Even if someone doesn't have plans to spend birthday with friends/family, they often assume that they will. Asking them out for their birthday therefore puts them in an awkward position: either they really want to go on the date with you, but then fear letting down their friends and family, or they just say no to you. It's generally risky business and not a good idea at all for a first date.
Uhm, I think the general idea is not to make a date FOR her birthday, but asking her out on her birthday for another day that is not her birthday. She won't miss anything at all of how her birthday is supposed to play out (except those 5 minutes talking to you), but someone finding her attractive enough to ask for a date will make her happy, even if (in the worst case) she does not like that person at all. Saying "this is my birthday present for you, let's go on a date tomorrow " is quite an imposition though and will probably not make her feel good in most cases.
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On September 15 2015 22:16 Fi0na wrote:Show nested quote +On September 15 2015 22:10 Acrofales wrote:
Asking her out for her birthday is a bad plan. Even if someone doesn't have plans to spend birthday with friends/family, they often assume that they will. Asking them out for their birthday therefore puts them in an awkward position: either they really want to go on the date with you, but then fear letting down their friends and family, or they just say no to you. It's generally risky business and not a good idea at all for a first date. Uhm, I think the general idea is not to make a date FOR her birthday, but asking her out on her birthday for another day that is not her birthday. She won't miss anything at all of how her birthday is supposed to play out (except those 5 minutes talking to you), but someone finding her attractive enough to ask for a date will make her happy, even if (in the worst case) she does not like that person at all. Saying "this is my birthday present for you, let's go on a date tomorrow " is quite an imposition though and will probably not make her feel good in most cases.
Oh, ok. Then carry on!
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On September 15 2015 16:06 bloodwhore~ wrote:Show nested quote +On September 15 2015 07:22 Zambrah wrote:Im thinking of asking her out
I ain't gots no monies
Time. Firstly. + Show Spoiler +https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5-sfG8BV8wU
I've been listening to that in the shower all week, is it weird that I find it hilariously inspiring?
EDIT: Well, the Songify version, same message though. 
Also, thanks for the advice everyone, I think I'll plan some sort of nature walk, theres lots of nice water around Rhode Island (not going to a beach though) so a foresty rivery walk would probably be a lotta fun.
Wish me luck, we dont really know each other very well at all but thats what datings for, eh. :D
Maybe she'll be in my Creature Creation Lab class today...
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EDIT: for incompetence <3
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I've been listening to that in the shower all week, is it weird that I find it hilariously inspiring?
Not at all, I get really hyped listening to it!
Sounds like a good plan, good luck!
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On September 15 2015 22:34 Zambrah wrote:Show nested quote +On September 15 2015 16:06 bloodwhore~ wrote:On September 15 2015 07:22 Zambrah wrote:Im thinking of asking her out
I ain't gots no monies
Time. Firstly. + Show Spoiler +https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5-sfG8BV8wU I've been listening to that in the shower all week, is it weird that I find it hilariously inspiring? EDIT: Well, the Songify version, same message though. Also, thanks for the advice everyone, I think I'll plan some sort of nature walk, theres lots of nice water around Rhode Island (not going to a beach though) so a foresty rivery walk would probably be a lotta fun. Wish me luck, we dont really know each other very well at all but thats what datings for, eh. :D Maybe she'll be in my Creature Creation Lab class today...
My interest is piqued. What the hell is a Creature Creation Lab class?!
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Went out for the first time in Ireland, now I know what a Saudi Arabian tourist in German feels like when he sees girls wearing dresses or sleeveless shirts.
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On September 16 2015 02:04 DickMcFanny wrote:
Went out for the first time in Ireland, now I know what a Saudi Arabian tourist in German feels like when he sees girls wearing dresses or sleeveless shirts.
Haha okay..? What kind of clothes do they wear in Ireland?
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I noticed a lot of young women who looked straight out of Jersey shore. Also a lot of sweatpants^^
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Hardly any. It was 8° out and everyone was wearing belt-like skirts and dresses that barely concealed the nipples.
Never seen that much flaunting in my life. It was like going to the butcher's.
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Saw this video about this guy going "offline dating".
https://vimeo.com/132695239
This is more or less the approach I will go for if/when I walk up to girl at campus. Straight to the point! In. Out. Slam. Bam. UH!
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On September 16 2015 03:18 bloodwhore~ wrote:Saw this video about this guy going "offline dating". https://vimeo.com/132695239This is more or less the approach I will go for if/when I walk up to girl at campus. Straight to the point! In. Out. Slam. Bam. UH!
Aren't you the thread's mascot virgin?
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On September 16 2015 04:23 B.I.G. wrote:
Aren't you the thread's mascot virgin?
Not quite sure what I said to get this insult! I'm assuming it was because of my ending notes, did I overdo it? I meant that was my tactic for approaching women, say few words, straight to the point, in and out fast as fuck to reduce risk of spaghetti.
And on to the mascot thing. I'm just here to hear what others would do if they were in my shoes, to clear my own thoughts, debate and most importantly to share my adventures so you guys have something fun to read. Furthermore I'm just like 50% a virgin 
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From your onomatopoeia it sounded like you thought you were going to have sex with all of them. I'm not sure what else that was supposed to sound like.
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On September 16 2015 04:49 bloodwhore~ wrote:Show nested quote +On September 16 2015 04:23 B.I.G. wrote:
Aren't you the thread's mascot virgin? Not quite sure what I said to get this insult! I'm assuming it was because of my ending notes, did I overdo it? I meant that was my tactic for approaching women, say few words, straight to the point, in and out fast as fuck to reduce risk of spaghetti. And on to the mascot thing. I'm just here to hear what others would do if they were in my shoes, to clear my own thoughts, debate and most importantly to share my adventures so you guys have something fun to read. Furthermore I'm just like 50% a virgin
You're still our mascot virign, though, since our previous mascot virgin is hooked up and happy (insofar as I know).
Please get yourself a funny suit and jump around in it at half time...
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On September 16 2015 05:35 Acrofales wrote:
You're still our mascot virign, though, since our previous mascot virgin is hooked up and happy (insofar as I know).
We should get another one! I myself think I'm rather decent in the 'dating' area if it wasn't for my dick going 404 on me. Meeting up with just three girls and could easily have had a good fuckbuddy system going on (i still sort of do since she still wants to meet up). I'm doing nofap for the dick problems, 34 days strong, and before my last relapse I only fapped twice in ~24 days!
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