Dating: How's your luck? - Page 418
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We are extremely close to shutting down this thread for the same reasons the PUA thread was shut down. While some of the time this thread contains actual discussion with people asking help and people giving nice advice, it often gets derailed by rubbish that should not be here. The moderation team will be trying to steer this thread in a different direction from now on. Posts of the following nature are banned: 1) ANYTHING regarding PUA. If your post contains the words 'alpha' or 'beta' or anything of that sort please don't hit post. 2) Stupid brags. You can tell us about your nice success stories with someone, but posts such as 'lol 50 Tinder matches' are a no-no. 3) Any misogynistic bullshit, including discussion about rape culture. 4) One night stands and random sex. These are basically brags that invariably devolve into gender role discussions and misogynistic comments. Last chance, guys. This thread is for dating advice and sharing dating stories. While gender roles, sociocultural norms, and our biological imperative to reproduce are all tangentially related, these subjects are not the main purpose of the thread. Please AVOID these discussions. If you want to discuss them at length, go to PMs or start a blog. If you disagree with someone's ideologies, state that you disagree with them and why they won't work from a dating standpoint and move on. We will not tolerate any lengthy derailments that aren't directly about dating. | ||
Dogfoodboy16
364 Posts
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rezoacken
Canada2719 Posts
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dravernor
Netherlands6175 Posts
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ZapRoffo
United States5544 Posts
On February 23 2014 14:21 dravernor wrote: I just don't know how they can let it go on that long without doubting the authenticity of the person. Especially if they never update their contact photo or do a reverse google image search etc. Some of them are dumb, most of them are very suspicious of the person but still like the personality they are talking to, and that's why they end up on the show, to find out who the person really is. Anyway from my experience, I had a long close online friendship (with attraction involved) with someone who was stingy about photos, video, personal identifying information, anything like that, but I didn't really care so much because the consistent intelligence, insight, and compassion she spoke (or wrote) with was impossible to fake. So even if the personal details she did give weren't exactly right, I was still talking to someone with those qualities in them, which is something of enormous value. Even though I wanted to meet her and know the real offline person as well, it was just clearly never worth it to push hard, it seemed disrespectful and not going to lead to a good result. But it also never felt off to me, and I always read it as her just wanting privacy and being cautious to not have crazy internet stalkers rather having than something to hide. | ||
Dogfoodboy16
364 Posts
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Snotling
Germany885 Posts
On February 23 2014 16:06 Dogfoodboy16 wrote: When's the best time to drop a surprise present on my gf? I just randomly bought us Springsteen tickets for a show a few months from now because she always talks about wanting to see them live. Should I just tell her now or wait until her birthday or our anniversary? All three are valid options, although you are settig the bar for her birthday present quite high if you are giving here the tickets out of the blue. | ||
arb
Noobville17920 Posts
After getting talked into going to the strip club monday night, one of the strippers gives me her phone number pretty randomly, saying text her snapchat etc etc. even though i only paid her 10(which was pretty small considering how much shit is there) furthermore, she stayed to talk to me for nearly 2 hours, despite me saying im not going to give her shitall else, and there was other people there who were in need of some lapdancing action. All the while she's asking me if i'd like her to buy me things(beer mostly) which struck me as odd since it's not like a stripper to go out and offer to buy me things?? Fastforward to friday and the same thing happens, except shes like wanting to buy me dances from her(essentially a win for both i guess thinking about it) but she mentions her baby daddy is still in her life(she's 24/25 with a kid) before i leave she again tells me to facebook her etc(gives full name info blah blah) My question here is, do i assume this is one big ploy to eat me out of my bank account or is this sincere? I haven't really talked to her much, and i don't feel like i have a grasp on her personality or anything and this is all pretty confusing cause i've never had this happen like. ever. | ||
Erik.TheRed
United States1655 Posts
On February 23 2014 21:19 arb wrote: Okay this ones a doozey, I am almost 100% certain of the answers i'm going to get(because i'm assuming them myself lolol) But here goes:: After getting talked into going to the strip club monday night, one of the strippers gives me her phone number pretty randomly, saying text her snapchat etc etc. even though i only paid her 10(which was pretty small considering how much shit is there) furthermore, she stayed to talk to me for nearly 2 hours, despite me saying im not going to give her shitall else, and there was other people there who were in need of some lapdancing action. All the while she's asking me if i'd like her to buy me things(beer mostly) which struck me as odd since it's not like a stripper to go out and offer to buy me things?? Fastforward to friday and the same thing happens, except shes like wanting to buy me dances from her(essentially a win for both i guess thinking about it) but she mentions her baby daddy is still in her life(she's 24/25 with a kid) before i leave she again tells me to facebook her etc(gives full name info blah blah) My question here is, do i assume this is one big ploy to eat me out of my bank account or is this sincere? I haven't really talked to her much, and i don't feel like i have a grasp on her personality or anything and this is all pretty confusing cause i've never had this happen like. ever. pretty sure this was an episode of HIMYM also be careful about "shitting where you eat" | ||
Monsen
Germany2548 Posts
On February 23 2014 21:19 arb wrote: Okay this ones a doozey, I am almost 100% certain of the answers i'm going to get(because i'm assuming them myself lolol) But here goes:: After getting talked into going to the strip club monday night, one of the strippers gives me her phone number pretty randomly, saying text her snapchat etc etc. even though i only paid her 10(which was pretty small considering how much shit is there) furthermore, she stayed to talk to me for nearly 2 hours, despite me saying im not going to give her shitall else, and there was other people there who were in need of some lapdancing action. All the while she's asking me if i'd like her to buy me things(beer mostly) which struck me as odd since it's not like a stripper to go out and offer to buy me things?? Fastforward to friday and the same thing happens, except shes like wanting to buy me dances from her(essentially a win for both i guess thinking about it) but she mentions her baby daddy is still in her life(she's 24/25 with a kid) before i leave she again tells me to facebook her etc(gives full name info blah blah) My question here is, do i assume this is one big ploy to eat me out of my bank account or is this sincere? I haven't really talked to her much, and i don't feel like i have a grasp on her personality or anything and this is all pretty confusing cause i've never had this happen like. ever. Sounds like a trainwreck waiting to happen. In other words; best for you: hands off, best for us: go for it and post all the drama! | ||
Mikau
Netherlands1446 Posts
That said I'd go for it, I like a bit of drama ![]() | ||
HeeroFX
United States2704 Posts
On February 23 2014 21:19 arb wrote: Okay this ones a doozey, I am almost 100% certain of the answers i'm going to get(because i'm assuming them myself lolol) But here goes:: After getting talked into going to the strip club monday night, one of the strippers gives me her phone number pretty randomly, saying text her snapchat etc etc. even though i only paid her 10(which was pretty small considering how much shit is there) furthermore, she stayed to talk to me for nearly 2 hours, despite me saying im not going to give her shitall else, and there was other people there who were in need of some lapdancing action. All the while she's asking me if i'd like her to buy me things(beer mostly) which struck me as odd since it's not like a stripper to go out and offer to buy me things?? Fastforward to friday and the same thing happens, except shes like wanting to buy me dances from her(essentially a win for both i guess thinking about it) but she mentions her baby daddy is still in her life(she's 24/25 with a kid) before i leave she again tells me to facebook her etc(gives full name info blah blah) My question here is, do i assume this is one big ploy to eat me out of my bank account or is this sincere? I haven't really talked to her much, and i don't feel like i have a grasp on her personality or anything and this is all pretty confusing cause i've never had this happen like. ever. I would be cautions lol seems fishy. But you know might as well send her a text and go to dinner and see what happens. Who knows could be your wife. But seems werid that stripper would do that lol | ||
Dogfoodboy16
364 Posts
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IgnE
United States7681 Posts
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Mikau
Netherlands1446 Posts
On February 24 2014 02:06 IgnE wrote: Why do you think you were chosen from among the clientele? What is different about you? Does she give you a reason for her selection of you? You can ask the same about any and every relationship/couple, every job interview and pretty much everything. | ||
Calanthe
United States139 Posts
On February 23 2014 21:19 arb wrote: Okay this ones a doozey, I am almost 100% certain of the answers i'm going to get(because i'm assuming them myself lolol) But here goes:: After getting talked into going to the strip club monday night, one of the strippers gives me her phone number pretty randomly, saying text her snapchat etc etc. even though i only paid her 10(which was pretty small considering how much shit is there) furthermore, she stayed to talk to me for nearly 2 hours, despite me saying im not going to give her shitall else, and there was other people there who were in need of some lapdancing action. All the while she's asking me if i'd like her to buy me things(beer mostly) which struck me as odd since it's not like a stripper to go out and offer to buy me things?? Fastforward to friday and the same thing happens, except shes like wanting to buy me dances from her(essentially a win for both i guess thinking about it) but she mentions her baby daddy is still in her life(she's 24/25 with a kid) before i leave she again tells me to facebook her etc(gives full name info blah blah) My question here is, do i assume this is one big ploy to eat me out of my bank account or is this sincere? I haven't really talked to her much, and i don't feel like i have a grasp on her personality or anything and this is all pretty confusing cause i've never had this happen like. ever. Holy shit, you guys. Strippers are people! Let's treat them like they are people! This is what girls do when they want to date you. Something about you interested her (were you wearing an expensive watch? Did you casually mention your family vacations to Saint-Tropez?) and now she'd like to talk to you more. Don't get ahead of yourself. We don't know anything else about her motivations here. Would you like to date a stripper? The profession comes with its own set of interesting hurdles for SOs. If you're a military wife, you have to deal with your husband being deployed for months at a time, and when you're dating a stripper, your girlfriend takes her clothes off for money. While this, in and of itself, is nothing bad or shameful, some men can't handle it because they like the idea of being the only person to see their girlfriend's naked body etc. Do you have the necessary open-mindedness to do this successfully? Are you ready and prepared to date someone with a kid, and are you ready to deal with the baby daddy? These are the questions you should be asking yourself. | ||
arb
Noobville17920 Posts
On February 24 2014 02:40 Calanthe wrote: Holy shit, you guys. Strippers are people! Let's treat them like they are people! This is what girls do when they want to date you. Something about you interested her (were you wearing an expensive watch? Did you casually mention your family vacations to Saint-Tropez?) and now she'd like to talk to you more. Don't get ahead of yourself. We don't know anything else about her motivations here. Would you like to date a stripper? The profession comes with its own set of interesting hurdles for SOs. If you're a military wife, you have to deal with your husband being deployed for months at a time, and when you're dating a stripper, your girlfriend takes her clothes off for money. While this, in and of itself, is nothing bad or shameful, some men can't handle it because they like the idea of being the only person to see their girlfriend's naked body etc. Do you have the necessary open-mindedness to do this successfully? Are you ready and prepared to date someone with a kid, and are you ready to deal with the baby daddy? These are the questions you should be asking yourself. I'm not sure how big into her life he is cause i wasnt really like, asking but she was talking about her life, school etc etc. I don't really give a shit what someone does for a living but the entire thing is like striking me as odd and im just like what the fuck is going on cause i have no intention of getting drawn into any kind of baby mama drama(that shit is for the fucking birds) Not to mention she is like kinda gitty(is that the word) about texting cause of her baby daddy who she isnt even with and im just like why the fuck did you even give me your number in the first place? I am not really sure how you are supposed to ask someone who you pay to see naked to go out and do something like that just blows my mind. In fact the entire thing blows my mind and im not sure what to make of it. On February 24 2014 02:06 IgnE wrote: Why do you think you were chosen from among the clientele? What is different about you? Does she give you a reason for her selection of you? Clearly the fact my hair is long as fuck, and noone seems to believe that strippers love long hair/women above anything else. Which i didnt either till i saw both of these in action :x I did tell her i'd sit and listen as long as she felt like talkign and she went on about all kinds of shit i was like what. Only left once but she came back and was like "that old guy gives me like 100$ everytime he's here so i had to go get it" and im like okay thats cool. I had clearly already told her im not paying her anymore tho. Obviously though I declined any offer for her to buy me things cause i'm not that kinda guy at all, bad idea/good idea? | ||
IgnE
United States7681 Posts
On February 24 2014 02:24 Mikau wrote: You can ask the same about any and every relationship/couple, every job interview and pretty much everything. Yeah ok. I'm asking it here though. He doesn't give enough information. | ||
Erik.TheRed
United States1655 Posts
On February 24 2014 08:48 arb wrote: I'm not sure how big into her life he is cause i wasnt really like, asking but she was talking about her life, school etc etc. I don't really give a shit what someone does for a living but the entire thing is like striking me as odd and im just like what the fuck is going on cause i have no intention of getting drawn into any kind of baby mama drama(that shit is for the fucking birds) Not to mention she is like kinda gitty(is that the word) about texting cause of her baby daddy who she isnt even with and im just like why the fuck did you even give me your number in the first place? I am not really sure how you are supposed to ask someone who you pay to see naked to go out and do something like that just blows my mind. In fact the entire thing blows my mind and im not sure what to make of it. Clearly the fact my hair is long as fuck, and noone seems to believe that strippers love long hair/women above anything else. Which i didnt either till i saw both of these in action :x I did tell her i'd sit and listen as long as she felt like talkign and she went on about all kinds of shit i was like what. Only left once but she came back and was like "that old guy gives me like 100$ everytime he's here so i had to go get it" and im like okay thats cool. I had clearly already told her im not paying her anymore tho. Obviously though I declined any offer for her to buy me things cause i'm not that kinda guy at all, bad idea/good idea? just go on a date with her, she's clearly still on your mind. i don't think it's fair to assume she has some ulterior motives at this point in time, just try and see things from her perspective. she's got baggage and probably 90%+ guys won't seriously date her because of her job. | ||
arb
Noobville17920 Posts
On February 24 2014 09:24 Erik.TheRed wrote: just go on a date with her, she's clearly still on your mind. i don't think it's fair to assume she has some ulterior motives at this point in time, just try and see things from her perspective. she's got baggage and probably 90%+ guys won't seriously date her because of her job. I mean yes its bad to assume that, but they are there to make money, and they have to manipulative and good with people to get what they want, that is kinda bothering me and has been since it all happened. Plus baby daddy is always a huge nono. I couldnt care less she strips or has a kid, but a baby daddy being an "active" part of their lives is something that noone should get their hopes up and not many people can deal with the fact you're never going to be before him no matter what if he's still in the picture | ||
KaiserKieran
United States615 Posts
Does anyone have any advice? | ||
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