EPTThe PUA community - Page 102
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NDDseer
Australia204 Posts
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Kojak21
Canada1104 Posts
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Deleted User 183001
2939 Posts
On February 25 2012 16:52 NDDseer wrote: Yeah things were starting to really progress with the input of RaspberrySC2 and good contributions by r.Evo and sunprince from my pov particularly, but then it all got screwed up by this JudicatorHammurabi guy trolling/being an idiot/expressing frustration at "how hard it is for him to pick up girls at his college cos he doesn't live on campus". I've gotten a decent number. In fact, got one just yesterday :s. I wouldn't say it's hard so much as it is you really have to play your cards right when all their other options are far more convenient and accessible, who they know and see a lot more often, and they have their own places and whatnot. So I guess that would make it tricky. I mini-trolled one line, with incredible results that not even I expected. Being an idiot? Doing things like explaining to people that indeed biology is a science, not a "science", is called wisdom, my friend. If you mean enlightening idiots, then you would be correct. Expressing frustration at this scenario? Yeah, I'm doing that a bit. XD Having been on both sides of the fence myself and having known people who have as well, it's a huge fucking difference. The fact that it's been the turn off on several occasions leaves me a bit bitter with regret XD, while it's been a bit of a letdown for them on others. But who cares? I like a challenge, as long as it doesn't end up killing me heh. This isn't the first time I've been in an uphill battle either, and so far I've done pretty okay past couple years. By the way, I just resolved the conflict in my edit in my last post, so if you're trying to be a douche and reignite it, go start a war somewhere else. EDIT: Now we have the guy who badmouths squattin now trying to be like a 'good guy' to get some cred. rofl. Gotta love tough guys XD. Damn, some people need to get over themselves. I resolve Evo's rage comments, then I decide to be the one to man up and bury the hatchet and end conflict, and we still got people trying to continue shit. The heck is wrong with you guys? *facepalm* EDIT2: Now, I have a serious question. Every now and then, a girl will tell me irl or online, that it was nice seeing me. Now in my experience, this either means she's just being friendly because they're awesome like that, or they're interested otherwise. How does one tell which one it is, as assuming the latter when it was actually the former hasn't turned out too well for me xd? | ||
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allecto
328 Posts
At the end of the day, don't force your philosophies down people's throats through belittling their own beliefs...it's sleazy and makes what good you have to offer look like horseshit as well. | ||
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der Koekje
Netherlands23 Posts
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r.Evo
Germany14080 Posts
Sadly his understanding of the world when it comes to geography is just as sad as his perspective of men/women, but, hey. Whatever makes the laughing little red men in the background happy is fine by me. =P On February 25 2012 19:14 der Koekje wrote: I'm quite surprised to see a thread on this here on TeamLiquid. Myself, I used to be a gigantic nerd who would just hang out with friends and do my own thing, however unlike most of my friends I did crave attention from the opposite sex but having no way or confidence to approach girls, it was an uphill battle. Luckily, I grew out of my social awkwardness around my 18th year and I feel more regular on the matter now. But I can tell what toll having no experience in my teen years has done for my confidence and a general 'way' around girls, so these PUA sites, communities and books can be a quite a game-changer for me. Especially since I'm in a phase of my life where I'm absolutely not out looking for something long term. The bolded part would be probably the most interesting part for the guys lurking this thread. What did you do/change to feel "regular" instead of socially awkward? | ||
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squattincassanova
United States650 Posts
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der Koekje
Netherlands23 Posts
On February 25 2012 21:38 r.Evo wrote: Dno, I find it kinda fun to "argument" with someone who keeps making up non-existant quotes or arguments and whenever you call him out on it he ignores it / makes up another non-existant quote. It's not necessarily productive but it kinda shows the other end of the "PUA community spectrum" and why most guys in the community are ashamed of it themselves. Sadly his understanding of the world when it comes to geography is just as sad as his perspective of men/women, but, hey. Whatever makes the laughing little red men in the background happy is fine by me. =P The bolded part would be probably the most interesting part for the guys lurking this thread. What did you do/change to feel "regular" instead of socially awkward? I think it was just a natural evolution. I was playing a competitive card game(Yu-Gi-Oh!, so go figure how bad it was) and we went from sitting in a basement of a hobby store to playing in Cafes and bars. Eventually we just grew accustomed to the scene. So I guess my advice would be to find some friends that like to hang out in more regular, social hotspots and you'll grow out of it automatically. This won't really help you get the girls though, and if you feel you have issues with that then it doesn't hurt to check some of these PUA topics out. I've been reading up on it and the tips they give and I try out actually do give me more confidence which is half the battle, really. Rejection hurts so it feels natural not to seek it out. | ||
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niteReloaded
Croatia5281 Posts
Yesterday I was out with a group of friends, and as normal you always get at least that one girl who's inviting you with her eyes. But I just wouldn't approach. Not because I was afraid this time, but because I'm so fucked up, that I was thinking 'trust me, you don't want me to approach, find someone better'. As the night went on, I kept getting the glances, until they started to turn into angry glances, like 'what the fuck, do I need to spell it out?'. Still didn't approach. lolz I considered going up to her, and just letting her know that I think she's hot as hell, but that I'm too fucked up to be good company to anyone, but didn't do it. too depressed these days | ||
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squattincassanova
United States650 Posts
On February 26 2012 06:31 niteReloaded wrote: It's not all easy for women. Yesterday I was out with a group of friends, and as normal you always get at least that one girl who's inviting you with her eyes. But I just wouldn't approach. Not because I was afraid this time, but because I'm so fucked up, that I was thinking 'trust me, you don't want me to approach, find someone better'. As the night went on, I kept getting the glances, until they started to turn into angry glances, like 'what the fuck, do I need to spell it out?'. Still didn't approach. lolz I considered going up to her, and just letting her know that I think she's hot as hell, but that I'm too fucked up to be good company to anyone, but didn't do it. too depressed these days Thats why the guys that approach get all the lays. Why do you think the average guy has fucked 20 girls their whole lives but the medium guy has fucked only 8. Why the discrepancy? How is the average 20, when half the guys out there have fucked less than 8? Well its that small group of guys that has sex with a shit ton of girls, and thats why the average is so high. Same with wealth and income. | ||
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bonedriven
258 Posts
1. Some girls get very serious when they speak to me like they are kind of nervous to speak to me. What does it mean? What should I do? 2. It seems I often give others a wrong impression that I must have a girlfriend but in fact I haven't a girlfriend at all. 3. Some girls seems intentionally to ignore me. I don't know but I find their coldness to me is not normal. Does it mean that they are playing the PUA's game? Thanks. | ||
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HardlyNever
United States1258 Posts
Needs less pointless arguments about nothing, imo. | ||
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Sogo Otika
60 Posts
1. Let the white knighting begin. 2. Dear female, please start reading heartiste.wordpress.com. | ||
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Sogo Otika
60 Posts
If they're nervous it's not because they like you. It's because they find you creepy and are scared of you and very unattracted to you. Which means you're doing something wrong. If you can, try get a third party friend to objectively tell you how you're coming across to people with your body language and demeanour. 2. It seems I often give others a wrong impression that I must have a girlfriend but in fact I haven't a girlfriend at all. Who are these 'others'? Do you mean they think you act like you need a girlfriend? I would suggest reading the OP and the 10 tips he gives. 3. Some girls seems intentionally to ignore me. I don't know but I find their coldness to me is not normal. Does it mean that they are playing the PUA's game? This is not a shit test, it means they think you're beta. Go to heartiste.wordpress.com and read about 10 backlog articles a day. In about a month you'll be sweet and set to go. | ||
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r.Evo
Germany14080 Posts
@1: "getting serious / being nervous" when they talk to you isn't enough info imo. Positive nervousness or negative nervousness? If it's the latter, Sogo above is most likely right. @2: It sounds as if it's along the lines of "Oh, don't kid me, you have a girlfriend, right?" then it's positive since the implication that you're already taken is a big DHV. What's your problem with that? @3: If a girl is beind cold and ignoring you... she probably, just probably doesn't enjoy talking to you. Whichever part was before she started to behave like that is the one you should analyze because you're failing at it atm. =P | ||
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Deleted User 183001
2939 Posts
The difference from coming across as having a meh attitude/demeanor, and coming across as happy and vibrant is pretty huge. Even with your own friends, if you act like a zombie around them one day, they won't feel so great around you as another day when you're bouncing off walls (figuratively speaking) with happiness and good cheer. With complete strangers? It's a huge fucking deal. If you come across stone-faced, sounding monotone, etc. they will be "ehhhhhhhhhh" and a bit uncomfortable, whereas your chances at sparking conversation will be a lot better if you're smiling, using expressive body language, and just looking and getting across the feeling that you're enthusiastic. And picking up girls aside, let's talk about more serious life-changing things like in-person job interviews and other critical social interactions, if you're the happiest and most enthusiastic person they've seen, they will view you a lot more highly and consider you a lot more significantly than if you just had an air of meh surrounding you. Why is this significant in regards to your questions? Fewer girls will be nervous / serious with you. If they see you're happy and enthusiastic, it will help them feel more comfortable. It'll also help girls be a bit more interested in talking to you, which means less ignoring. Flame me, yeah, it sounds like a little insignificant difference whether you come to someone seeming serious/indifference or seeming vibrant, but in fact your demeanor makes a world of difference with people :D. It's veryyyyyy significant, and I know that all too well haha. TL;DR: Be happy and enthusiastic. It helps a lot. | ||
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Sotamursu
Finland612 Posts
On February 26 2012 16:35 JudicatorHammurabi wrote: Here's my 2cents, and it's a huge fucking deal, and it's not just with random girls, but with anyone in general. This is something that has helped me a lot over the years with any sort of social interactions and I'm sure can help anyone and everyone. The difference from coming across as having a meh attitude/demeanor, and coming across as happy and vibrant is pretty huge. Even with your own friends, if you act like a zombie around them one day, they won't feel so great around you as another day when you're bouncing off walls (figuratively speaking) with happiness and good cheer. With complete strangers? It's a huge fucking deal. If you come across stone-faced, sounding monotone, etc. they will be "ehhhhhhhhhh" and a bit uncomfortable, whereas your chances at sparking conversation will be a lot better if you're smiling, using expressive body language, and just looking and getting across the feeling that you're enthusiastic. And picking up girls aside, let's talk about more serious life-changing things like in-person job interviews and other critical social interactions, if you're the happiest and most enthusiastic person they've seen, they will view you a lot more highly and consider you a lot more significantly than if you just had an air of meh surrounding you. Why is this significant in regards to your questions? Fewer girls will be nervous / serious with you. If they see you're happy and enthusiastic, it will help them feel more comfortable. It'll also help girls be a bit more interested in talking to you, which means less ignoring. Flame me, yeah, it sounds like a little insignificant difference whether you come to someone seeming serious/indifference or seeming vibrant, but in fact your demeanor makes a world of difference with people :D. It's veryyyyyy significant, and I know that all too well haha. TL;DR: Be happy and enthusiastic. It helps a lot. You should be careful when taking in advice like this. It's easy to become an attention seeking clown by trying to act too positive. | ||
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Deleted User 183001
2939 Posts
On February 26 2012 17:27 Sotamursu wrote: You should be careful when taking in advice like this. It's easy to become an attention seeking clown by trying to act too positive. Yes, of course. I should have added it as a disclaimer/warning. Doing good things unreasonably in some manner may hurt more than it helps  . | ||
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niteReloaded
Croatia5281 Posts
On February 26 2012 16:35 JudicatorHammurabi wrote: Here's my 2cents, and it's a huge fucking deal, and it's not just with random girls, but with anyone in general. This is something that has helped me a lot over the years with any sort of social interactions and I'm sure can help anyone and everyone. The difference from coming across as having a meh attitude/demeanor, and coming across as happy and vibrant is pretty huge. Even with your own friends, if you act like a zombie around them one day, they won't feel so great around you as another day when you're bouncing off walls (figuratively speaking) with happiness and good cheer. With complete strangers? It's a huge fucking deal. If you come across stone-faced, sounding monotone, etc. they will be "ehhhhhhhhhh" and a bit uncomfortable, whereas your chances at sparking conversation will be a lot better if you're smiling, using expressive body language, and just looking and getting across the feeling that you're enthusiastic. And picking up girls aside, let's talk about more serious life-changing things like in-person job interviews and other critical social interactions, if you're the happiest and most enthusiastic person they've seen, they will view you a lot more highly and consider you a lot more significantly than if you just had an air of meh surrounding you. Why is this significant in regards to your questions? Fewer girls will be nervous / serious with you. If they see you're happy and enthusiastic, it will help them feel more comfortable. It'll also help girls be a bit more interested in talking to you, which means less ignoring. Flame me, yeah, it sounds like a little insignificant difference whether you come to someone seeming serious/indifference or seeming vibrant, but in fact your demeanor makes a world of difference with people :D. It's veryyyyyy significant, and I know that all too well haha. TL;DR: Be happy and enthusiastic. It helps a lot. Completely disagree. I spent some time being 'happier than I was', and while at first you get positive responses, you can't form deeper connections because people can't connect to the real you, and can sense it. You'll realize that you're actually buying the reactions from people by constantly investing energy into 'being positive'. So don't do it. I now get truer correspondence with people by just being depressed if I'm feeling that way. Faking is a big no imo. On February 26 2012 17:33 JudicatorHammurabi wrote: Yes, of course. I should have added it as a disclaimer/warning. Doing good things unreasonably in some manner may hurt more than it helps .Being more positive than you are is not a good thing. It alienates people. It's just like you own a grocery store, and hang a sign that says "EVERYTHING 99% OFF TODAY". Then people rush in all excited and happy, but then they see it's not true, and they start discarding you as phony. | ||
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bonedriven
258 Posts
On February 26 2012 12:42 r.Evo wrote: Mhmm... @1: "getting serious / being nervous" when they talk to you isn't enough info imo. Positive nervousness or negative nervousness? If it's the latter, Sogo above is most likely right. @2: It sounds as if it's along the lines of "Oh, don't kid me, you have a girlfriend, right?" then it's positive since the implication that you're already taken is a big DHV. What's your problem with that? @3: If a girl is beind cold and ignoring you... she probably, just probably doesn't enjoy talking to you. Whichever part was before she started to behave like that is the one you should analyze because you're failing at it atm. =P Excuse me about my ego but what I think is most of the time they get positive nervous. I appear to be a smart guy to most people, including girls. Friends say that I'm a talented person. Girls tell me that I'm very funny. However, I still haven't got a girlfriend. It seems I can attract girls that I don't like. But I fail instantly when I meet a girl I like. | ||
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