Well, I'm writing this, because I'm a little bit confused, feeling-wise. I'm really good in reading human feelings and maybe I can help someone.
On the other hand I'm not writing this text only for the sake of other people. Maybe a few of you could help me out of this really really annoying situation.
Okay well, I want to point out, having a really close friendship with a girl and loving a girl is such a difficult thing.
My best female friend just lost her boyfriend (such an asshole, but she loves him like I never saw a person love someone before) and she cannot simply forget him. When he broke up (with a chat message.. how poor?) I was with her the whole weekend and she shed alot of tears. Too much for me too handle.
It broke my heart seeing her cry like she did. I got so angry at this guy I wanted to beat the living sh*t out of him!
I took her in my arms, trying my best to make her not feel alone. But as surely some of you will know, its so hard to find the right words in such a situation.
Now we are best friends and we are spending alot of time togehter. The problem is.. I've feelings I cannot deny and I told her that. I felt like an asshole to tell her that. She just lost her boyfriend and she's not ready for a relationship and she will not in quiet some time. Okay, I'm very sorry that I told her what I feel, but we talked about it. She said she would never start a relationship with me, because I'm simply a too good friend.
Its okay for me. I just want to be her best friend. Well..
Since I told her what I feel, she is not like she was before. Her behaviour is soo different. I just tried to be a good friend, being at her side, hugging her and I tried to distract her from her loss.
Okay well. She told me I'm overdoing it a bit. She doesn't want me to be soo close to her. I would frustrate her and she needs a little space. Its okay for me...
But now I'm so afraid to lose her friendship.... even if she told me that I'm her best friend. I don't know... I'm so confused-.-;;