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This really cought me of guard. So here I am, writing a girl blog on TL.
Tbh this has been my favourite community on the internet since I joined in 2014 . So, here I am. Talking to you...
The story goes like this.
Last year, in July I hit it off with a really great girl that I really liked for a long time. Everything went amazing for two months and we were really happy. It was super fun. But I had a nervous breakdown somewhere mid September due to utter academic faliure. It just happened like a tsunami. Everything in my life crumbled and I couldn't handle it. I began a pattern of extremely self-destructive behavior and it started channeling to her. Everything was still pretty new and she couldn't handle me in that state. Ffs I couldn't handle me in that state.
She called it quits shortly after. I haven't been myself for more then a month before that point so it's quite understandable.
In December she tried to talk to me again but I just kinda used that opportunity to hurt her out of spite. We had no contact after that.
In this time I had managed to sort myself out. Started cleaning my room. I took control over my life and academic work. I made some new friends and am enjoying life.
Then, two weeks ago, she contacts me. We had a nice conversation and everything was fine. We saw each other in person twice (her idea). Nothing ever happened, we just talked. I didn't want to talk about what had happened before, since I didn't want to recall any bad memories. I apologized for being a jerk and she said it was fine and that she forgives me.
She did ask me about my state from last year though, so I told her. No details.
We keep contact now. All our conversations are actually quite fun and interesting and engaging.
I still have feelings for her. I don't know if and how should I even tell her. And I have trouble reading her intentions since I am kind of socially awkward and have never been good at these kinds of stuff.
I don't know what to do really...
 
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This seems pretty straight forward in my opinion. She has kept in contact despite repetitive bad "endings" with you, and wants to meet you. She's thinking about you and she cares about you, good!
You can either tell her up front or continue hanging out with and show initiatives (i.e., don't just let her take action). I'd recommend the first though, chicks love honesty, and seeing as how she first contacted you, you can reward her with some good old-fashioned frankness. Truly, if you do want to date her or start a relationship, just keep it up and don't be inactive/show signs of disinterest. I don't really see how you can fuck this up (unless you do something REALLY stupid, don't do that).
Look, being socially awkward isn't necessarily a bad thing. I can be difficult as hell in my relationships, but I can always discuss and talk it out, which is a super-useful skill in a relationship. Just, be honest towards the both of you, and you should be fine.
Since you have some history between the two of you, try to learn from it  Also, you write that the two first months were super fun, so don't fall into the fallacy that you have to get back to that place. Nostalgia can be a bitch sometimes in letting you think that just because you aren't in that happy place you once were, you are doing it "wrong". Both of you are different people compared to that time. Just a heads up!
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Great job on cleaning your room How old are you?
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On July 14 2017 05:51 Jerubaal wrote:
Great job on cleaning your room How old are you?
It's an internet meme.
23 actually. Not that it matters
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United States2829 Posts
Just tell her you like her and still have feelings for her, and given the chance you would like to make up for mistreating her in the past. Ask her on a date, something she thinks is fun.
But what did you mean clean your room? You still in highschool? And why did you fail academically? To me these are more interesting  edit: damn memes, pls keep pepe out of the girl blog and in the kitchen
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On July 14 2017 06:03 CecilSunkure wrote:Just tell her you like her and still have feelings for her, and given the chance you would like to make up for mistreating her in the past. Ask her on a date, something she thinks is fun. But what did you mean clean your room? You still in highschool? And why did you fail academically? To me these are more interesting edit: damn memes, pls keep pepe out of the girl blog and in the kitchen
It's not a pepe thing as far as I know
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On July 14 2017 05:58 Sakat wrote:Show nested quote +On July 14 2017 05:51 Jerubaal wrote:
Great job on cleaning your room How old are you? It's an internet meme. 23 actually. Not that it matters
Well I think the salient question is whether or not you are a mature, healthy adult now.
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On July 14 2017 06:35 Jerubaal wrote:Show nested quote +On July 14 2017 05:58 Sakat wrote:On July 14 2017 05:51 Jerubaal wrote:
Great job on cleaning your room How old are you? It's an internet meme. 23 actually. Not that it matters Well I think the salient question is whether or not you are a mature, healthy adult now.
Seems like these meetings/conversations are for both of them to assess that question. I wouldn't rush it, a new, or renewed in this case, relationship can be an attractive time sink.
Keep seeing/talking to her, so you are accustomed to setting time aside for her, but maintaining the other stuff. I imagine over time it will come up somewhat naturally (like you go to a restaurant and the server presumes you're a couple or something) or your desires will eventually steer you that way when it feels right (might be a tougher read if you're generally awkward).
If I put myself in her mind, it'd be remembering the how good the good was, but also how bad the bad was and wanting to know if it's likely to get bad again.
So for instance if you mentioned blowing off class to meet up with her that would probably trigger alarm bells, conversely, if you talk about ho well your academic stuff is going it's likely to make her feel more comfortable with the idea of going back to the good times. Particularly as the chatting and hanging out reminds her of that part.
just my $0.02
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You'll do good in life if you assume that every time a girl initiates a meeting (outside of professional settings), she's curious about the D.
If you're also curious about the V, you should make moves, and in those 10% cases where you turn out to be wrong, you will be let know.
That's a slightly humorous comment.
On a more straightforward note: Yes, she's curious about you. Lead in the direction you want to, while listening out for her feedback (non-verbal and verbal).
/always funny to respond to countrymen to english
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-fuck i keep quoting myself instead of editing.-
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I was going to give "joke advice" but have no idea what your mental state is like, so I'd better not.
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Papua New Guinea1059 Posts
BUY HER A PEPPERONI PIZZA
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United States2829 Posts
On July 15 2017 03:25 ninazerg wrote:
I was going to give "joke advice" but have no idea what your mental state is like, so I'd better not.
well now we're all curious!
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If she makes the effort to try and keep in touch with you, then she might want to rekindle your old relationship. I'd reccomend you just go for it and ask her out, and if she says no, then hopefully you can still be friends.
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On July 15 2017 03:25 ninazerg wrote:
I was going to give "joke advice" but have no idea what your mental state is like, so I'd better not.
I am actually mentally fine atm so joke away
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On July 15 2017 09:51 Sakat wrote:Show nested quote +On July 15 2017 03:25 ninazerg wrote:
I was going to give "joke advice" but have no idea what your mental state is like, so I'd better not. I am actually mentally fine atm so joke away
That's what an insane person would say.
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On July 15 2017 15:28 ninazerg wrote:Show nested quote +On July 15 2017 09:51 Sakat wrote:On July 15 2017 03:25 ninazerg wrote:
I was going to give "joke advice" but have no idea what your mental state is like, so I'd better not. I am actually mentally fine atm so joke away That's what an insane person would say.
Crap. I got busted!
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Ok what you should do is seem interested in one of her female friends then gauge her reaction.
This should tell you all you need to know.
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On July 16 2017 19:38 iPlaY.NettleS wrote:
Ok what you should do is seem interested in one of her female friends then gauge her reaction.
This should tell you all you need to know.
Bad idea.
She will think you have the hots for her friend forever... trust me, you'll get into a situation at some point where you wish you hadn't done this.
get a small amount of liquid courage and just tell her straight - that's ALWAYS the best option.
don't go for any deceiving, weird shit like some people suggest here.
Be honest... right from the start.
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Treasure it...be kind and genuine
That's all you can do really
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EPT
