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Active: 1218 users

How I destroyed my own life by tryin to b progamer - Page 3

Blogs > Jumperer
Post a Reply
Prev 1 2 3 4 Next All
CaucasianAsian
Profile Blog Joined September 2005
Korea (South)11584 Posts
Last Edited: 2014-09-07 18:50:04
September 07 2014 18:49 GMT
#41
psychology degree means you have a potential for working in HR for many companies, plus many jobs including sales representatives, advertising, psychiatric technician, market research, social services, etc...) Bi-lingual = big advantage (look at thai / us companies). As the Thai economy is improving, I'm sure there is a lot of demand out there for translation jobs, interpretation, etc...

just don't give up!
Calendar@ Fish Server: `iOps]..Stark
DarkPlasmaBall
Profile Blog Joined March 2010
United States44987 Posts
Last Edited: 2014-09-07 18:59:56
September 07 2014 18:59 GMT
#42
On September 08 2014 03:35 Poo wrote:
Tittle seems a little over-dramatic. You're just 26 years old; you have a long road ahead of you. Calling everything you've done to be a waste is overdoing it. Graduating and having a college degree is great - it's a step in the right direction. Think positively.


I've had friends who were in the same boat as him, and some of them had complete meltdowns. It appears that Jumperer is lacking direction, doesn't know how or where to focus his attention, and just feels like he's been wasting his family's time and money and potential by just going through the motions of getting an easy (for him) degree and playing games instead of doing something more constructive (long-term).

Fortunately, he recognized that he's in an unfortunate situation. Now he just needs the motivation to make an effort to get out of it. He's definitely young enough that his life isn't over, or that all hope is lost. He just needs to wake up and get his shit together. That's easier said than done, so I think finding mature friends that already have their shit together would be a great way to get personal feedback and assistance. Even better would be if those friends had jobs that interested him, so he could learn a bit about them and maybe get a position working.

Jumperer, get out there and network, and also find something you're passionate about (regardless of whether or not it's related to psychology). Even if you don't land a psych-specific job, a psych degree should still help you with your social skills and understanding the minds of people/ groups of people. Psych was one of my minors, and it's helped me communicate and collaborate with different groups of people.

On September 08 2014 00:13 Jealous wrote:
Show nested quote +
On September 07 2014 20:04 DarkPlasmaBall wrote:
I agree with everyone here. It's good you've finally realized how much time you've wasted (better late than never), and don't think that the rest of your life is futile. Show how sorry you really are by compensating for the time you've wasted. Delete the games you're addicted to, find a job or internship, and bring your family some honor Go do something with your life! Best of luck!

Listen to this man. I met DPB in real life and he is someone to be respected and looked up to. He is around your (and my) age and is probably one of the busiest and most driven people I ever met.


Haha thanks ^^
"There is nothing more satisfying than looking at a crowd of people and helping them get what I love." ~Day[9] Daily #100
Integra
Profile Blog Joined January 2008
Sweden5626 Posts
September 07 2014 19:15 GMT
#43
It sounds more like the recent downfall of the economy "destroyed" your life and not Esports.
Regarding work, you should be able to get some well payed jobs considering your education, maybe open up your own practice at some point? Problem is the economy but its getting better and the unemployment rate of academics is predicted to drastically go down within the next couple of years.

Personally my top 3 university educations that are worth investing in are IT/systems development, Engineering and Psychology, and I can't really see how your investment has been a waste, unless you don't try to profit from it by looking for jobs and so forth, once the economy has gotten more stable.
"Dark Pleasure" | | I survived the Locust war of May 3, 2014
Enki
Profile Blog Joined January 2007
United States2548 Posts
Last Edited: 2014-09-07 20:13:42
September 07 2014 19:27 GMT
#44
Meh, kind of in the same position. Kinda screwed because the economy as well since jobs are practically impossible to find where I live. I was kinda the same way during middle/high school myself though, it's pretty common to feel that way. The education system here seems designed to make you apathetic towards it.

Like others have said you are still young, and as bad as you feel about your situation there are tons people who are far worse off. It's hard to stay positive but I think it's a must right now. The worst thing to do is constantly think about how bad things are and let it consume you.

On September 08 2014 04:15 Integra wrote:
It sounds more like the recent downfall of the economy "destroyed" your life and not Esports.

It fucked over a lot of young people. My town lost many businesses during the recession and never really recovered from it. Much of the country is the same way, it's just harder these days. Keep your chin up man.
"Practice, practice, practice. And when you're not practicing you should be practicing. It's the only way to get better. The only way." I run the Smix Fanclub!
PassionFruit
Profile Blog Joined April 2012
294 Posts
September 07 2014 19:52 GMT
#45
You can still turn your life around.

I work pretty heavily in the criminal justice system, so my view of "destroyed my life" tends to skew very heavily to those who have jumped into an endless chasm of despair. Drug abuse, criminal convictions, etc... You're young, healthy, and have a college education. You've also identified your problem and want to change. You're well above ground zero. I've seen people below ground zero turn their lives around for the better. It's not easy, and it takes a lot of hard work and grit. But it can be done. And it's all up to you.

I'm not going to give you specific advice on what you should do because...well because it's fucking dumb to do so. Plus you're not even asking for advice in your blog, so I won't be an asshat and give you unsolicited advice. I don't know anything about you, where you're from, what you want to do, what you can do, etc... Just be methodical, driven, and smart in your approach and you'll be above 90% of your competition that just goes with the flow or does what is traditionally accepted. But like I said before, it's all up to you.

Sink or swim, the only thing you can rely upon is yourself.
QuanticHawk
Profile Blog Joined May 2007
United States32083 Posts
September 07 2014 20:14 GMT
#46
On September 08 2014 01:46 Ctone23 wrote:
Show nested quote +
On September 07 2014 22:17 QuanticHawk wrote:
hate to break it to you, but with a psych degree, you either become a social worker, or you go back to school if you wanna do any of the cool stuff you can do in psychology. i mean maybe youll luckj out somewhere but that's usually how it goes



That's not true. Some professions call for specific degrees, and of course major corporations require impeccable credentials, but a huge chunk of people out there have jobs that have literally no correlation to the degree they have.

It really comes down to effort, networking, even getting lucky. I've seen it time and time again.

that's what i mean by getting lucky. by his own admission he has done zero networking
PROFESSIONAL GAMER - SEND ME OFFERS TO JOIN YOUR TEAM - USA USA USA
REDBLUEGREEN
Profile Blog Joined June 2008
Germany1904 Posts
September 07 2014 21:29 GMT
#47
Imagine you ride your bike to school with a group of friends. You ride really casually and arrive 5 minutes later then most of them. Afterwards you suddenly decide for yourself that this was a bicycle race and that you are a failure and pathetic for going so slow.

It makes no sense.

To fail at something you first need to have a set goal. It makes no sense to set the goal only afterwards and judge your performance then.

When you were younger you didn't care about a good job or 100k income.
You can't call yourself a failure and pathetic when you had no motivation and in fact not even this goal in the past.
Now you have this goal. Good. You can start now to achieve it but it is counterproductive and even illogical to blame your past self for this situation(which btw is still very good compared to the majority of humanity).
hp.Shell
Profile Blog Joined April 2010
United States2527 Posts
September 07 2014 22:02 GMT
#48
I'm curious. Do you have anything holding you back from something you really want to do? For example, I have heard stories where people have problems going after a dream, and it is actually for a simple reason that they don't know about before hearing this:

Every time they mention that they would like to do something, they are met with hostility from parents / family / friends, people who want to keep them in the place of failure so that they don't feel bad about their OWN failure to reach whatever goal they wanted to achieve.

For example, say you wanted to be a writer, and you told your mom one day that you wanted to write science fiction books for a living. If she said something like "that's not you," or "that's a bullshit career" etc, anything negative without really giving reasons for it and just abusing you and bullying you, then this could be a source of the problem with motivation. Only if this happens continually and almost every time, does this apply.

In this situation, the person with dreams eventually has enough of it and just closes up, their mind shuts off, no internal monologue, etc because "to think is to be abused; to express a preference is to be savagely attacked." So, it becomes easier for the person to defeat himself before opening his mouth, and he forgets that he even HAS thoughts, and it becomes debilitating in this way.

Then, when the person wants to achieve a goal, he will start toward that direction, and then feel a great lack of motivation towards achievement - this lack of motivation has been found to be linked to past abuse and attacking of preferences when that person mentioned his goals to others.

It's like the saying when you blow out birthday candles. Don't tell anybody your wish, because then it won't come true!
Please PM me with any songs you like that you think I haven't heard before!
hellokitty[hk]
Profile Joined June 2009
United States1309 Posts
September 07 2014 22:31 GMT
#49
Use good wrist posture and exercise them a bit.
People are imbeciles, lucky thing god made cats.
L1ghtning
Profile Joined July 2013
Sweden353 Posts
September 07 2014 23:38 GMT
#50
I think the best thing you could probably do is to put your regrets aside for a bit. You're upset about your past, but you need to realize that it's the past. It doesn't have to define your future. You can make a conscious choice to change the person that you are today.

The future is only terrifying for those who are not living in the present.
What I mean with that is that if you have a clear purpose and direction in life, and you're happy with where that will lead you, that you will feel content, even if your current life situation is miserable. I'm saying this, because I don't want you to focus on the rough path ahead of you and give up, either by stop trying or taking your own life. You may be a long way from accomplishing something that you would be proud of, but accomplishments doesn't make you happy, it's the journey there that does.

It's only through the pursuit of happiness that we can be happy. Happiness is not something that you achieve as the fruit of your labour. Sure, you can get temporary relief when accomplishing something, but it's only temporary. Does it make an actor happy to win an Oscar? Only temporarily, and if he was depressed to begin with, it will only make him more depressed. Happiness can't be achieved, it's something you feel when you're working towards your goals. So, don't get too caught up in your thoughts about how hard it would be to turn your life around. Think really hard and figure out something worthwhile to focus on, and then do it. And if you can't figure it out now, settle for a while on something that is atleast somewhat productive, but bearable, and engage with other ppl to try and spark an interest. What you need is motivation.

It is probably a good idea to tell your family about the things that you just shared here. If they know about your gaming dreams, it can help them understand you more, and they can help you in the right direction. At the very least I hope you have a real life friend to turn to.
2primenumbers
Profile Blog Joined February 2014
United States144 Posts
Last Edited: 2014-09-08 02:45:55
September 08 2014 02:45 GMT
#51
Use your Mind to empower yourself. Teach yourself a peaceful meditation and flex your muscles against gravity to help out with that weak gamer body you may have developed. It helped me!
o face
Redrot
Profile Blog Joined September 2012
United States446 Posts
Last Edited: 2014-09-08 03:21:44
September 08 2014 03:21 GMT
#52
Everybody gets one chance at life. As long as at the end of it you look back on it and are glad that you lived it, you did great. There is no golden rule stating that "you have to do something amazing with your life." Just do whatever makes you happy and keeps you running. Some live to party, some live to get rich, some live to make a difference, some do other shit, just do whatever works for you man.

edit: oh shit its my birthday
I root for CJ because their fb posts are hilarious
GoTuNk!
Profile Blog Joined September 2006
Chile4591 Posts
Last Edited: 2014-09-08 03:37:07
September 08 2014 03:35 GMT
#53
Here



About your hands, your muscles are prolly just chronically tight from lack of stretching trough the years. A good chiro should be able to loosen the muscles trough massage and re allign the joints completely if they got misplaced. Do NOT go to a doctor, find a chiro. Hands have small muscles and tendons so they can be completely fixed trough external manipulation by someone competent.

Also, wathever you do, lift weights and read books.
DarkPlasmaBall
Profile Blog Joined March 2010
United States44987 Posts
Last Edited: 2014-09-08 03:48:45
September 08 2014 03:45 GMT
#54


2 more:
+ Show Spoiler +





"There is nothing more satisfying than looking at a crowd of people and helping them get what I love." ~Day[9] Daily #100
Liquid`Jinro
Profile Blog Joined September 2002
Sweden33719 Posts
Last Edited: 2014-09-08 05:00:22
September 08 2014 04:10 GMT
#55
Man, 26 aint no age wtf

There's people who get out of a warzone at that age and still manage to lead a productive life after it. (Yeah I've heard this is the kind of shit you shouldn't tell someone who's depressed but, I personally the times I've felt really down and shitty about where I was at in life, thinking about how people have overcome worse situations than mine tended to help me realize I can do something)

And you have a degree, there's no possible way you are as big of a fuck up as you think if you managed to get that. Just swallow your pride and knuckle down and get to work.

Your life is nowhere near as fucked as you think it is... Someone close to me missed out on way more of their life b/c of various circumstances (illness, some school problems etc) and is only a couple of years younger than you and starting university now basically.

I recognize some of what you've said here, and I'm not trying to trivialize your feelings but man you've done better for yourself than you think and so what if you made mistakes, all you can do is try to do right by yourself and your family from this day on.
Moderatortell the guy that interplanatar interaction is pivotal to terrans variety of optionitudals in the pre-midgame preperatories as well as the protosstinal deterriggation of elite zergling strikes - Stimey n | Formerly FrozenArbiter
Stratos
Profile Blog Joined July 2010
Czech Republic6104 Posts
September 08 2014 07:05 GMT
#56
The reason you're feeling hopeless is your depression. You're incapable of objectively judging your situation. You're a healthy bilingual 26 years old dude with a degree. Get a job with that, any job. Office job or fast food job. Take care of yourself and repay your family. That'll help you crawl out of the depression shithole and then you can decide what you want to do with your life. Good luck.
En Taro Violet
iPlaY.NettleS
Profile Blog Joined June 2010
Australia4350 Posts
Last Edited: 2014-09-08 09:06:21
September 08 2014 09:06 GMT
#57
A progaming career is something only 1 in 1000000 hopefuls can ever achieve, it shouldn't be your only goal.My advice is to uninstall Starcraft 2 and any other games you have this obsession with, these games should be stress relievers and a part time hobby not something that consumes your life.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=e7PvoI6gvQs
SagaZ
Profile Blog Joined May 2009
France3460 Posts
September 08 2014 13:25 GMT
#58
Hey
You know that right now you look back 3 years in the past and think "wow, if only I woke up back then, it would be so much better right now"
well if you don't change anything, in 3 years you will be thinking the same. The past always looks a lot easier than the present, but it's the same. Your life is obviously not in a good spot, but it can change, you can make it change.
Be nice, buy wards and don't feed double buff.
Djzapz
Profile Blog Joined August 2009
Canada10681 Posts
September 08 2014 14:16 GMT
#59
OP, I've been there... For different reasons but I've been there. Still a little bit in there. You just need to try to take the first step to try to get out. And if at first you fail, then try again. Do what you can to become a bit independent, and even if your job sucks and makes you depressed, you'll at least be independent. Or less dependent. You're young enough to turn it around cheers.
"My incompetence with power tools had been increasing exponentially over the course of 20 years spent inhaling experimental oven cleaners"
ninazerg
Profile Blog Joined October 2009
United States7291 Posts
September 08 2014 16:18 GMT
#60
On September 08 2014 12:45 DarkPlasmaBall wrote:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LbKkkZNwmN4

2 more:
+ Show Spoiler +

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PH8nTfxwByY

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-bl00JpCU0s




What I saw at first:

[image loading]

What I thought at first:

"Stop Making Excuses Ni..." -> "Stop Making Excuses Nigga"

...

How did I become such a racismist?
"If two pregnant women get into a fist fight, it's like a mecha-battle between two unborn babies." - Fyodor Dostoevsky
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