The year is 2015, and the world has fallen into chaos. Riots across the globe erupt as the economy collapses and international trade falls apart. The future is bleak (thanks a lot, Obama!) and Democracy no longer rules in America. In this dystopian universe, the President of the United States of America is no longer chosen by elect, but by gladiatorial wild animal single elimination tournament. The rules of the tournament are simple: each contestant chooses an animal. Two animals goes in, one comes out until only one remains!. Between each round you get to replace your animal with another copy of the same animal if it's tired or whatever, but you can't change what animal you've picked between rounds. The grand prize: the winner gets to choose the next President of the United States.
By cunning or guile or bribery you've made it to the the first round of the tourney. You have a chance to choose the next President and potential save the world! You have only one decision left to make:
Which animal do you choose to fight for you, and why? Make sure to also explain how your animal is gonna totally shit on whatever other animals the other contestants will choose.
Oh yeah your animal doesn't get to bring items in with it. So you can't pick like "homo sapiens" and it just be like a guy with a gun. If you pick a human you get a regular naked human.
Edit: okay actually your human gets to wear like jeans shoes and a shirt
There's a separate tournament for aquatic animals held on even-numbered years-- since it's an odd-numbered year the arena is not aquatic. You can take a jellyfish for this year but it'll have trouble fighting elephants in the like since it'll drown very quickly on land.
E: Personally I'd pick a Snake since they lack natural predators. Like a good poisonous snake that might be venomous enough to kill something big like a bear or an elephant and quick enough to avoid being seen or eaten by anything.
On May 24 2013 03:41 Blazinghand wrote: Oh yeah your animal doesn't get to bring items in with it. So you can't pick like "homo sapiens" and it just be like a guy with a gun. If you pick a human you get a regular naked human.
Edit: okay actually your human gets to wear like jeans shoes and a shirt
okay so the arena is like arena like the romans fought in, but studded with trees, bushes, and rocks. There's not water or a lake or anything, and the ground isn't sloped but it's not like a track. Imagine like badlands with more trees
Also: "Due to its striking hunting technique, the Peregrine has often been associated with aggression and martial prowess. Native Americans of the Mississippian culture (c. 800–1500) used the Peregrine, along with several other birds of prey, in imagery as a symbol of "aerial (celestial) power" and buried men of high status in costumes associating to the ferocity of "raptorial" birds.[90] In the late Middle Ages, the Western European nobility that used Peregrines for hunting, considered the bird associated with princes in formal hierarchies of birds of prey, just below the Gyrfalcon associated with kings. It was considered "a royal bird, more armed by its courage than its claws"."
If you pick something that's planning to hide for 10 years until the other animal dies, by the way, bear in mind that the USA will be without a president in the post-Apocalypse during that whole time, and everyone will know it's your fault.
Pretty sure it takes less than 10 years for most animals to die from starvation lol Actually dehydration would kill most first Face it,the Tardigrade is your champion wimpy mortals.
EPT
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