TAKING A SHIT

On April 25 2013 09:50 ninazerg wrote:
WORST THREAD IN HUMAN HISTORY, on any forum on any internet ever, as this was a literally an example of shitty shittiness in the most shitty form possible for any human being to conceive, even under the influence of alcohol and drugs, including cocaine, meth, crystal meth, golden meth, marijuana tablets, acid, heroin, angel dust, extasy, xanax, cialis, and any obscure drugs that I haven't thought of because I wouldn't even waste my time going to wikifuckingpedia to find a page entitled "list of illegal drugs, real and fictional" to even potentially lend any shred of legitimacy to this god-forsaken excuse for a thread that you should be ashamed even entered your mind to create and I want you to know that I hate you personally for this bullshit shit shitty thread that is a shit-stain on the underwear of teamliquid.net, and that this thread alone has killed eSports, resurrected it as a zombie, and then forced it to commit suicide, because this is just such a horribly bad thread that words cannot express how much badness could be jam-packed into the OP and if I had a genie I would actually use one of my three wishes to wish this thread out of existence because of how unbelievably and unequivocally atrocious this garbage dumpster full of rats and cockroaches and AIDS and new Blizzard titles and demons and worms and hobos and people who pick teemo in league of legends, and bullshit, and horseshit, and apeshit, and birdshit, and goatshit, and elephantshit, and fishshit, and humanshit, and platypusshit, and catshit, and batshit, ratshit, and cactusshit, and ponyshit, and fairyshit, and unicornshit, and pegasusshit, and fucking fuck this post happens to be because it's like literally the thread-equivalent of Jar-Jar Binks and Transformers 2 combined into word-form and smeared across a baby's face right before the baby is dropped into a volcano full of molten lava and then explodes to form a radioactive evil baby that has to be destroyed by lasers and shit, even though all of Earth's mightiest weapons fail to stop such a monstrosity, but the baby falls into a meat-grinder and then the meat becomes rotten and maggots form on it, but the maggots all fucking die because the meat is so putrid that no biological organism can possibly sustain it's life while in a 50-mile radius in proximity to this meat, which eventually turns into fossil fuel and is used by a coal-powered sawing machine to cut down the last tree in Ferngully, except unlike the cartoon movie, they fucking succeed and all the pandas, white tigers, and all the precious animals we have worked so hard to preserve just fucking explode for no reason because of how terrible the exhaust from this unstoppable killing machine is, and then that smog goes into the atmosphere and kills all the birds, who drop dead all over the world, and Al Gore cannot buy enough carbon credits to stop the Earth's Axis from throwing itself off a cliff, and The Day After Tomorrow movie literally happens literally, and to top it all off, they put cheese on my burger when I specifically said no cheese, but the McDonald's employees have all become braindead zombies because of the polluted air and begin melting like they just saw the ark of the covenant, while meanwhile, the Emperor from Star Wars, Osama bin Laden, Hitler, Team Rocket and Lord Frieza all combine to attempt to create something more evil, but fail astronomically, because they cannot measure up to how frickin' bad this OP just is, and that's not just my opinion, that's an actual scientific fact that was confirmed by Einstein and fucking Neil deGrasse Tyson on prime-time TV in front of the world, using calculations based a new quantum formula for determining how shitty posts are by a team of extraterrestrial lizard-men who were brought into MIT to work with another team of top-notch math guys from Berkeley to create an algorithm for determining the exact amount of shittiness in this thread specifically, but they all died from exposure to the results, and would have been named heroes for the sake of science and humanity, but they received public condemnation from all the world leaders except for North Korea for having anything remotely to do with what was done here while all the famous poets of the past have rolled over in their graves so many times, and with such intensity that engineers are using them to power turbines as a new alternative energy source and are saying that all of the world's energy needs will be met by approximately next tuesday and that we can shut down all the big coal power plants that causing fish to mutate and grow three penises because how much toxic sludge they produce, but a spokesman for coal power said that the new alternative energy source was being caused by a pollution far worse than any exposure to sludge, poison, radiation, Justin Bieber "music", Ben Affleck, intense heat/cold, gamma rays, death rays, stingrays, medical waste, or vast amounts of cum being spewed onto them by very angry Japanese men bukkaking on them while wearing voodoo masks and summoning the darkest demons from the most forbidding, cold and evil parts of the abyss of hell to come to Earth and piss all over everyone's faces, which would be this thread right here, in the flesh, not worth the pixels on the screen, nor the server space used to house this insignificant body of text, which should cause the server holding this data to be ripped out of the wall or whatever is holding it, torn open viciously by some kind of dinosaur, and the circuit boards and disk should be scrubbed clean with oxyclean, soap, water, acid, toothpaste, and then be placed in a steel safe inside of a concrete bunker 7,000 feet below the surface of the earth and blown to smithereens by all the nuclear weapons in the arsenal of humankind and then the area should be covered in concrete, and then steel, and the blown up again, and everyone in the world should be stripped down naked and scrubbed and hosed down completely like 50 times per day just to be safe.

On April 25 2013 09:50 ninazerg wrote:
WORST THREAD IN HUMAN HISTORY, on any forum on any internet ever, as this was a literally an example of shitty shittiness in the most shitty form possible for any human being to conceive, even under the influence of alcohol and drugs, including cocaine, meth, crystal meth, golden meth, marijuana tablets, acid, heroin, angel dust, extasy, xanax, cialis, and any obscure drugs that I haven't thought of because I wouldn't even waste my time going to wikifuckingpedia to find a page entitled "list of illegal drugs, real and fictional" to even potentially lend any shred of legitimacy to this god-forsaken excuse for a thread that you should be ashamed even entered your mind to create and I want you to know that I hate you personally for this bullshit shit shitty thread that is a shit-stain on the underwear of teamliquid.net, and that this thread alone has killed eSports, resurrected it as a zombie, and then forced it to commit suicide, because this is just such a horribly bad thread that words cannot express how much badness could be jam-packed into the OP and if I had a genie I would actually use one of my three wishes to wish this thread out of existence because of how unbelievably and unequivocally atrocious this garbage dumpster full of rats and cockroaches and AIDS and new Blizzard titles and demons and worms and hobos and people who pick teemo in league of legends, and bullshit, and horseshit, and apeshit, and birdshit, and goatshit, and elephantshit, and fishshit, and humanshit, and platypusshit, and catshit, and batshit, ratshit, and cactusshit, and ponyshit, and fairyshit, and unicornshit, and pegasusshit, and fucking fuck this post happens to be because it's like literally the thread-equivalent of Jar-Jar Binks and Transformers 2 combined into word-form and smeared across a baby's face right before the baby is dropped into a volcano full of molten lava and then explodes to form a radioactive evil baby that has to be destroyed by lasers and shit, even though all of Earth's mightiest weapons fail to stop such a monstrosity, but the baby falls into a meat-grinder and then the meat becomes rotten and maggots form on it, but the maggots all fucking die because the meat is so putrid that no biological organism can possibly sustain it's life while in a 50-mile radius in proximity to this meat, which eventually turns into fossil fuel and is used by a coal-powered sawing machine to cut down the last tree in Ferngully, except unlike the cartoon movie, they fucking succeed and all the pandas, white tigers, and all the precious animals we have worked so hard to preserve just fucking explode for no reason because of how terrible the exhaust from this unstoppable killing machine is, and then that smog goes into the atmosphere and kills all the birds, who drop dead all over the world, and Al Gore cannot buy enough carbon credits to stop the Earth's Axis from throwing itself off a cliff, and The Day After Tomorrow movie literally happens literally, and to top it all off, they put cheese on my burger when I specifically said no cheese, but the McDonald's employees have all become braindead zombies because of the polluted air and begin melting like they just saw the ark of the covenant, while meanwhile, the Emperor from Star Wars, Osama bin Laden, Hitler, Team Rocket and Lord Frieza all combine to attempt to create something more evil, but fail astronomically, because they cannot measure up to how frickin' bad this OP just is, and that's not just my opinion, that's an actual scientific fact that was confirmed by Einstein and fucking Neil deGrasse Tyson on prime-time TV in front of the world, using calculations based a new quantum formula for determining how shitty posts are by a team of extraterrestrial lizard-men who were brought into MIT to work with another team of top-notch math guys from Berkeley to create an algorithm for determining the exact amount of shittiness in this thread specifically, but they all died from exposure to the results, and would have been named heroes for the sake of science and humanity, but they received public condemnation from all the world leaders except for North Korea for having anything remotely to do with what was done here while all the famous poets of the past have rolled over in their graves so many times, and with such intensity that engineers are using them to power turbines as a new alternative energy source and are saying that all of the world's energy needs will be met by approximately next tuesday and that we can shut down all the big coal power plants that causing fish to mutate and grow three penises because how much toxic sludge they produce, but a spokesman for coal power said that the new alternative energy source was being caused by a pollution far worse than any exposure to sludge, poison, radiation, Justin Bieber "music", Ben Affleck, intense heat/cold, gamma rays, death rays, stingrays, medical waste, or vast amounts of cum being spewed onto them by very angry Japanese men bukkaking on them while wearing voodoo masks and summoning the darkest demons from the most forbidding, cold and evil parts of the abyss of hell to come to Earth and piss all over everyone's faces, which would be this thread right here, in the flesh, not worth the pixels on the screen, nor the server space used to house this insignificant body of text, which should cause the server holding this data to be ripped out of the wall or whatever is holding it, torn open viciously by some kind of dinosaur, and the circuit boards and disk should be scrubbed clean with oxyclean, soap, water, acid, toothpaste, and then be placed in a steel safe inside of a concrete bunker 7,000 feet below the surface of the earth and blown to smithereens by all the nuclear weapons in the arsenal of humankind and then the area should be covered in concrete, and then steel, and the blown up again, and everyone in the world should be stripped down naked and scrubbed and hosed down completely like 50 times per day just to be safe.

unbelievably and unequivocally atrocious this garbage dumpster full of rats and cockroaches and AIDS and new Blizzard titles and...platypusshit...cactusshit...

Jar-Jar Binks and Transformers 2 combined into word-form and smeared across a baby's face...

and then that smog goes into the atmosphere and kills all the birds, who drop dead all over the world, and Al Gore cannot buy enough carbon credits to stop the Earth's Axis from throwing itself off a cliff...

...while all the famous poets of the past have rolled over in their graves so many times, and with such intensity that engineers are using them to power turbines as a new alternative energy source and are saying that all of the world's energy needs will be met by approximately next tuesday

On April 25 2013 10:05 EtherealDeath wrote:
I'm demanding compensation for the loss of 10,000 brain cells.

On April 25 2013 16:49 Stealthypoo wrote:


No kidding.. omg. What a ball of text.


blog post 5/5 though =D

On April 25 2013 01:02 MysteryMeat1 wrote:
5/5 this was fucking awesome lol.



my reaction after reading.