Progress on improving my confidence and communicat

meguca

United States78 Posts

September 30 2012 02:17 GMT

ion

I have been trying to improve myself in those areas because I believe that doing so will lead me to live a healthier, more worthwhile life.

At a coffee shop there was a girl; the service was slow, so I spoke to her using that as a conversation starter. I asked about her employment (architecture - a recently employed Ivy League graduate) and a slight amount of small talk was made.

I'm happy because I was able to talk to a complete stranger like that, I've never been able to do that before. Hopefully I will improve even more in the future. It might sound really silly of me, but this is a big step for me!

The main problem I have isn't participating in a conversation - I've always been told that I'm very pleasant to talk to and an excellent listener. I'm just very insecure, so it's extremely difficult for me to take the initiative and start talking to someone (both male and female).

Also, I would like to share this comic. I think it's very funny: http://spikedmath.com/498.html

Fyodor

Canada971 Posts

September 30 2012 10:31 GMT

Yeah if you play it safe and never embarrass yourself in public you get some benefit. Your inner self is at peace and you can do your thing in life without a dozen voices in your head telling you what's right and what's wrong.

If you are more outgoing in life and also more assertive then you also run the risk of constant negative feedback which can be worse than being a reserved person. Your concept of self gets warped and you can get manipulated by people you thought were trustworthy.

I don't often initiate conversations mostly because my interests are pretty narrow and intense so it's pretty unlikely that a conversation becomes fulfilling. Sometimes though being like that you really enjoy a casual conversation with regular folks because it feels fresh and new.