Life is crazy. You never know when it will end.Or how it will go. Ive always been a go with the flow kinda guy frustrating my woman a lot. I like making people happy its one of the things I know Im good at and with the balloon thing it just cements it. I love helping people and when I really think about it its because it makes me feel good. I am selfish... I dont want to be but I am, I want attention and I want to be liked. Dont we all?
Im not very smart, I dont always think things through enough or at all. My mind goes a million miles a minute and my mouth nor my fingers can keep up. I want people to understand me and feel frustrated when I cant communicate it.I love my family and music and art and this community and all its silliness. As much as id like a world without drama if I think about it I do love the scandal the thought of being in the know ... Im such a garbage typical human... I dont want to be but I am.
I person very close to me lost someone very close to them and its really hit me hard. At least the Idea of legacy of what am I doing what have I done and just who am I. Driving long distances alone helps me think and I did that for a bit last night. I wish I had more answers I wish I could create a make everyone happy pill... I want people to think good of me when I am gone I want them to just remember me at all.
I was saving my 100th blog for something meaningful to me 10 year on this site.Ive grown up alot on this site and still have much growing to do. I wish not a single one of you any harm or bad things in your life I hope you find joy and happiness and a goal a purpose and find and succed in having people love and think of you long after your gone. I am always growing ....
If helping people makes you feel good it probably means you care about them, which means it's more something about love rather than about being selfish. I believe that's a better perspective most of the time at least. =)
But yeah, we all have some selfishness in us that we have to deal with I guess. And if you deal with it by making others happy then I think that's not bad at all! ^^
Btw, you certainly don't have to make balloons for us to justify making a blog around here, but it sure does make me happy when you do. :D
Makes sense to me. The older you get the less you believe life is crazy because you become accustomed to new things popping up all the time and you realize it's been like that all along. It's like learning to drive and being focused on pressing down the clutch instead of what color the lights are. Once you get used to the clutch, you move on to the rules of the road like signs, lights, etc. What, then, is the next step after the lights and all of that have been figured out as well? You learn that any new occurrence can be classified as a type of something that you've experienced before, and the only lesson that remains is that life is crazy, sure, but only where crazy is the norm.
I rated a 5; introspection and reflection is the only way we better ourselves.
Its not always easy to introspect, even harder to write about it.
Just remember that even ordinary seeming people can do great things. Maybe not create a make everyone happy pill, but at least you can make those around you happy through good ol' fashioned cheerful disposition!
FuDDx, we will remember you man.. you're a great human being! Cheers
Btw, same here I thought about this last night when our "Comedy King" died due to being too old. He had cemented his legacy because everyone loved him due to being really funny, then I asked myself.. Was I able to make an impact to people's lives? When I did something good to them or because of my funny jokes? Man, only way to find out when you hear the eulogy.. but that's another story and I have too many plans to think that death is near
"Cause there ain't no flame that can blaze enough To trump being hated for the way you love And cry yourself to sleep and hate waking up It's a cold world y'all shame on us Live in two worlds with your eyes closed Tip toeing on a tight rope Holding on for survival Nobody to blame this is just how it goes"
This makes me like you all the more FuDD. You're a great guy I'm glad you have shared at least some of that with us here. I hope to live my life like you.
"Cause there ain't no flame that can blaze enough To trump being hated for the way you love And cry yourself to sleep and hate waking up It's a cold world y'all shame on us Live in two worlds with your eyes closed Tip toeing on a tight rope Holding on for survival Nobody to blame this is just how it goes"
On July 12 2012 06:57 FuDDx wrote: Life is crazy. You never know when it will end.Or how it will go. Ive always been a go with the flow kinda guy frustrating my woman a lot. I like making people happy its one of the things I know Im good at and with the balloon thing it just cements it. I love helping people and when I really think about it its because it makes me feel good. I am selfish... I dont want to be but I am, I want attention and I want to be liked. Dont we all?
Why's it so bad to feel good about helping people?
Im not very smart, I dont always think things through enough or at all. My mind goes a million miles a minute and my mouth nor my fingers can keep up. I want people to understand me and feel frustrated when I cant communicate it.I love my family and music and art and this community and all its silliness. As much as id like a world without drama if I think about it I do love the scandal the thought of being in the know ... Im such a garbage typical human... I dont want to be but I am.
Meh, be glad your mind is going a million miles a minute rather than two centimeters per hour like people like me
I person very close to me lost someone very close to them and its really hit me hard. At least the Idea of legacy of what am I doing what have I done and just who am I. Driving long distances alone helps me think and I did that for a bit last night. I wish I had more answers I wish I could create a make everyone happy pill... I want people to think good of me when I am gone I want them to just remember me at all.
I was saving my 100th blog for something meaningful to me 10 year on this site.Ive grown up alot on this site and still have much growing to do. I wish not a single one of you any harm or bad things in your life I hope you find joy and happiness and a goal a purpose and find and succed in having people love and think of you long after your gone. I am always growing ....
Sorry for the lack of balloons.
My best advice is to use these feelings of restlessness and wanting to break out of the norm and really experience the flush of life, its ups and downs, and make a life that is memorable to your own.
Thanks Fudd, after so long speaking to you, I think this is probably the first time I've seen anything more than a glimpse of the man behind the balloons. It's sweet to think you can be this open here.
Life is full of moments that make you take stock of yourself; if the worst you can say is that you sometimes can't be as good a man as you wish you were, I think you're doing okay.
On July 12 2012 07:39 DarkPlasmaBall wrote: I think a lot of us want to please everyone all the time. Unfortunately, that just can't happen.
Slightly off topic... did you become a "quality poster" just by posting lots of balloon pictures?
Because I could hardly read this blog... I don't understand how it's *quality* anything.
i didn't know being mean or rude to fuddx was possible but you've done it. congrats.
so what if his blog's been featured for having amazing pictures of balloon art? we have blogs featured because of cooking advice, charcoal drawings of celebrities, 5 minute videos of esports video production, etc etc. personally, fudd's and glider's blogs are the only ones i find to be consistently interesting.
keep it up fudd! you're one of the nicest, most interesting guys on the internet.
Had a blast hanging out with you at Blizzon 08' (?) I think it was.
Man... you saved my ass that night of the OSL finals. Was really good times hanging with you then..hilarious watching you perform magic to passerbys and freak them out whenever we were smoking a cig or something.
Of course.. Hotel Room 'breaks' were always the best...
On July 12 2012 07:39 DarkPlasmaBall wrote: I think a lot of us want to please everyone all the time. Unfortunately, that just can't happen.
Slightly off topic... did you become a "quality poster" just by posting lots of balloon pictures?
Because I could hardly read this blog... I don't understand how it's *quality* anything.
i didn't know being mean or rude to fuddx was possible but you've done it. congrats.
so what if his blog's been featured for having amazing pictures of balloon art? we have blogs featured because of cooking advice, charcoal drawings of celebrities, 5 minute videos of esports video production, etc etc. personally, fudd's and glider's blogs are the only ones i find to be consistently interesting.
keep it up fudd! you're one of the nicest, most interesting guys on the internet.
Prolly cause the guys made 15000 posts in two years and doesn't understand that just sometimes, quality > quantity
I felt the same exact way that you did a few months ago. I was driving home from class and I saw a guy die in a motorcycle accident right in front of me.. and for a while after that, it really sunk in that life could end in an instant. And then my mind started wandering to how much of an effect I could make in the limited time I have.. in some ways that's really depressing, but in some ways it's the biggest motivator ever. Sometimes, when my mind is really stuck on something, I'll go on a drive really late at night, kinda like how you said you like driving long distances, it's probably one of the best stress relievers.
Had a breakdown about college about 5 minutes ago, after reading this blog I kind of feel like I'm pants on head retarded for even thinking that not going to stanford is going to ruin me. Thanks for the reality check FuDD.
Fuddx You will never cease to bring a smile to my face. If only for your legacy of "The most awesome poster ever on TL" I'll remember you. Shit I remember more fuddx things than I remember about most progamers from when you started on TL. Someone tell me about Zues and I'll tell them 2 things about Fuddx
Hopefully your friend can deal with the grieving. My condolences to them.
It really seemed heartfelt, wistful, and melancholy, but everyone is speaking as if FuDD is leaving. The last few lines sounds like you're leaving but you didn't actually say so. If you're actually leaving then...wow. I'm at a loss for words whatever you do and wherever you go, I wish that the bigger picture for you ends up a happy one >_<
Thanks for this FuDDx, almost more than the great balloon-work you produce your great positivity always stands out. I try and limit any blogs I do to artistic stuff but blogs like this can be heartening, and sharing these moments of introspection can help others too! Congratulations on the 100th blog, I'm always happy to see you post
Hey all .... I want to say thank you ,your words mean more than you could know. Ive been having a couple hard days lately and not a damn thing to blame it on.Things are pretty good at home, I would love a better more consistent way to provide for my family but its not something that is currently hindering our lifestyle.
My emotions propel me through this world, My wife tells me I am way too sensitive and worried to much about others.Its not something I can help, not sure I would want to be any other way though.
Heading to DisneyLand on Friday that should make me happy. I really can not wait to share the fun with my kids. My daughter has been a few times before, it will be my sons first time.
One of my oldest best friends lost his sister on Monday she was amazing... She was a little older than us 40, she took her own life. Leaving 3 kids with her ex husband who is a good guy. I hope her children can get through this.
Some guy got caught and ran off while he was dumping a woman's body into a garbage bin near my house.This world is truly a mess, I just want to make it a bit better, sometimes it gets to me though.
Dont give Darkplasmaball to much trouble, I realize trying to read my thoughts and writings is not the easiest thing in the world..... I have trouble figuring out what I meant sometimes. Tact I think is something our younger generation lack, and couple that with the anonymity of the internet well... and the ability to be whoever whatever you want .. I try to always be me, sure I might gloss over some of my flaws and focus on things I think others would like....Just look at the balloon thing. But I am always me . ( Second grade writing is ok no? haha)
This site and more important all of you mean a crazy amount to me as a free, safe spot I can share myself around a common interest.Ive made friends both in real life and online here.Like I said in the op Ive grown up here these last 10 years.And I hope to be here for years to come.
I hope you all can find yourself, be happy with yourself ,and be willing to grow and make this place(TL) and this world a place where we think a little bit more, and share a bit more, and give love, especially when we don't feel like it.
Right on. Really wise words there FuDD and MightyAtom, all of it.
Sometimes...life just throws stuff at us out of the blue, really serious, really painful stuff. You look around at something to blame, some cause of this problem but there's nothing there but, well, the pain :/
Hope your time at Disneyland goes well. Enjoy yourself over there man!! It's truly good to see you're still doing alright over there. You've brought so much joy to so many people on a regular basis, so it's only natural that when you're down, we reach out and try to comfort you somehow! All the best, and hope your son's ready for the awesomeness~
Great post FuDD, I'm in the same boat man all you can do is keep your head up and keep on keeping on whatever that means, sounds cool Cheers and GL Teamliquid will always be here.
From what you wrote, I can assume that you are pretty nice person. I kind of understand the urge to make everyone else feel happy. But then, if that done too much would maybe lead to trying to please everyone. And obviously, we are afterall humans despite how much we like to possess superpower, we cannot do everything all at once. I think the best thing to do is to identify the people you love - those who mean something to you, and make them happy. For me, it was always about pulling a rope from two sides: Do I want myself to be happy or do I want my parents to be happy? Yes, I'm Asian . I don't want to live entirely for the others yet I don't want to live entirely for myself. Life for me is like trying to find that answer which I will probably only know when I'm gone.
On July 12 2012 06:57 FuDDx wrote: Life is crazy. You never know when it will end.Or how it will go. Ive always been a go with the flow kinda guy frustrating my woman a lot. I like making people happy its one of the things I know Im good at and with the balloon thing it just cements it. I love helping people and when I really think about it its because it makes me feel good. I am selfish... I dont want to be but I am, I want attention and I want to be liked. Dont we all?
Im not very smart, I dont always think things through enough or at all. My mind goes a million miles a minute and my mouth nor my fingers can keep up. I want people to understand me and feel frustrated when I cant communicate it.I love my family and music and art and this community and all its silliness. As much as id like a world without drama if I think about it I do love the scandal the thought of being in the know ... Im such a garbage typical human... I dont want to be but I am.
I person very close to me lost someone very close to them and its really hit me hard. At least the Idea of legacy of what am I doing what have I done and just who am I. Driving long distances alone helps me think and I did that for a bit last night. I wish I had more answers I wish I could create a make everyone happy pill... I want people to think good of me when I am gone I want them to just remember me at all.
I was saving my 100th blog for something meaningful to me 10 year on this site.Ive grown up alot on this site and still have much growing to do. I wish not a single one of you any harm or bad things in your life I hope you find joy and happiness and a goal a purpose and find and succed in having people love and think of you long after your gone. I am always growing ....
Sorry for the lack of balloons.
Adhere to your responsibilities and nurture the positive growth of your desires. I know it sounds like a fortune cookie, but it is the best advice I can give. Find out what is important to you, and work your ass off for it.
Neil DeGrasse Tyson once said something like, "I live each day with two goals: To know more today about the world I live in than the day before, and to limit the suffering of others."
These words are truly genius. Think of limiting the suffering of others not as donating 25 cents a day to a starving kid in Africa...think of it on an everyday scale...like with your girlfriend. Good luck.
Sorry to hear about your friends sister I think its great to have the attitude you have, as long as you really accept that there will always be things you just wont be able to help with. Dont worry about Darkplasmaball, its all good now =)
EPT
whatever you do and wherever you go, I wish that the bigger picture for you ends up a happy one >_<![[image loading]](http://www.joe-ks.com/archives_mar2007/LawnChairPilot.jpg)
