[girl blog] Fear? advice? - Page 2

On July 09 2012 17:20 FractalsOnFire wrote:


lolol when i get a number i just text the same day/next day to try and set up a date. Works most of the time. Oh and why would you ever want her to hang out with your friends when both of you aren't serious?

Also the first video i stopped watching the moment he said 'to avoid rejection'. If anything you WANT rejection, so that you don't have to waste any more time on her. Sure it sucks but find another girl who is deserving of your time and attention. Second video was fine though, good message.



My gripe is that dating is about getting to know one another and whether both of you fit into each other's lives. Something like rock climbing, go karting, or movies are fun but assessing relationship potential isn't really there (versus a casual meet up). Fun can always come later after the date =P

On July 09 2012 20:26 sluggaslamoo wrote:


Because his friends are helping them hookup in the first place right? Makes sense to me in this situation.

Some people are the kind that are willing to get past rejection to get the girl they want. There have been a couple of times where I've been "rejected" and ended off having a better relationship than girls that have asked me out. I don't really believe in that sort of screening. The other thing is nobody wants to put themselves in a situation that will increase your chances of being rejected, when if you had been a little smarter about it, you might have ended up having a good relationship.

I usually give it a day or two just to not sound needy, but you can also text on the night if you want to, depends what sort of vibe she gives you I guess. Some people think the wait is stupid and you should text her right away, I dunno, I kind of want to avoid the "oh god this guy is gonna be really clingy" or "this guy is going too fast" judgement. What happens if she doesn't respond? Organising a date afterward is gonna be really awkward. The difference is between organising a date, and having a date kind of set up for you already taking a lot of the pressure off, and showing the girl that it isn't a big deal.

I mean think about it this way, when you ask your friends out, do you organise a trip to the cafe like its this big thing that you need to mark on your calendar, or are you like "hey I'm going to the cafe today wanna come?". Do you text friends straight away, or do you text them when something comes up?

On July 09 2012 14:10 Torte de Lini wrote:

Here's your plan:

THERE IS NO PLAN

Plans are for people with goals and "accomplishments", you are meeting a person. It's an introduction, if you're thinking in terms following a rigid recipe (even with adaptation to the scenario), you're going to fail, you're going to be aiming too hard and you're going to give into your nervousness.

The idea of just talking is exactly that: talking. The result is whatever you feel towards the person, is she attractive. Is there something about her that interests you? Would you like to know more and just move from there. Anything else and you're just setting yourself up to be somewhere you might not necessarily be and then you'll end up comparing and that'll affect your confidence.

Don't let the idea that because your friends are setting you up to be introduced to her means 1. you must hit it off, 2. you must immediately introduce yourself. When you're ready and if she entices you, go ahead and approach her.

You're not looking to score a job and I assume you're not looking for sex. If you're looking to getting to know her more, show that by asking interesting questions and then when you hit a mutual interest or occupation, suggest you should do it sometime together.

That's really it. Wear comfortable clothes and just talk casually. Don't let these stupid social stigmatized rules dictate your behavior. There are no rules because there are no sets or types of people and even if there were, they work differently depending on the person they're interacting with, etc. In the end, if you need a confidence boost: you are at a party, get a drink.

On July 09 2012 14:10 Torte de Lini wrote:

Here's your plan:

THERE IS NO PLAN

On July 10 2012 11:40 Santa Cruz wrote:
The fact is if you've already had the date organised for you - the girl is expecting you to lead. Don't be afraid to grope her 'inappropriately'. She wants you to take her to bed, otherwise she wouldn't have agreed to the hook up in the first place. A lot of guys make the mistake in putting a girl on a pedastal and always trying to make sure that she's feeling happy and comfortable, but that's not what they want (in fact, they fucking hate it when a guy tries too hard to please them) - a girl is at her happiest when you are happy. The only thing that will prevent you from getting laid with her is your own belief that she might not want it. Don't think like that, always remember: "Put your dick first."

On July 10 2012 11:58 r.Evo wrote:
......besides the fact that his view of her intentions is very screwed. This is pretty much a "friends make a dumb introduction" not "horny girl wants to get hooked up".

On July 10 2012 12:13 Santa Cruz wrote:


Don't know if you're aware, but girls want to get fucked. You know that song by Cyndi Lauper? She had to change the words to make it radio friendly, but it's the truth.

It's human nature. Most guys like when they say they go to clubs because they like the music and want a night out dancing. Bullshit. They want to find a girl and lay her.

This girl is horny. She wants to hook up. She just needs to find the right man who she will be willing to open her legs for.

It's ridiculous to think that girls don't want sex, that they just want to be introduced to some guy for no other reason other than to be friendly and platonic. She has a biological clock ticking inside her and it's waiting to go off.

The ball is in the OP's court. He can either have a great night out and enjoy his time with this girl and drop her off at the end of the party - be an 'entertainer' for the night. Or he can end up being in a relationship with her and have some really great sex. It's not easy - confidence doesn't come naturally to some guys. But it's better to try and fail rather than not try at all. And what he needs to do is view her as a horny girl who wants to hook up, not as a friend, because at the end of the day he doesn't just want a friend - otherwise he wouldn't have made this girl blog.

On July 10 2012 12:13 Santa Cruz wrote:


Don't know if you're aware, but girls want to get fucked. You know that song by Cyndi Lauper? She had to change the words to make it radio friendly, but it's the truth.

It's human nature. Most guys like when they say they go to clubs because they like the music and want a night out dancing. Bullshit. They want to find a girl and lay her.

This girl is horny. She wants to hook up. She just needs to find the right man who she will be willing to open her legs for.

It's ridiculous to think that girls don't want sex, that they just want to be introduced to some guy for no other reason other than to be friendly and platonic. She has a biological clock ticking inside her and it's waiting to go off.

The ball is in the OP's court. He can either have a great night out and enjoy his time with this girl and drop her off at the end of the party - be an 'entertainer' for the night. Or he can end up being in a relationship with her and have some really great sex. It's not easy - confidence doesn't come naturally to some guys. But it's better to try and fail rather than not try at all. And what he needs to do is view her as a horny girl who wants to hook up, not as a friend, because at the end of the day he doesn't just want a friend - otherwise he wouldn't have made this girl blog.