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What "can't be arsed" means:+ Show Spoiler +can't be arsed (British taboo!) if you can't be arsed, you will not make the necessary effort to do something (often + to do sth) Basically... Can't be bothered.
Hello
If you're reading this post, it means that, right now, you feel gloomy. Or depressed. Even depressive. It's alright, we all do. To some extent, everyone in this world does. We're all the same, sort of.
I decided to post this as I saw DoctorHelvetica's post as well as some of the replies where people opened up as well. I wished DrH would have acted on my PM but I'll just tell people in general the same thing (the exact same thing I'm telling myself day after day to change as a person, to go forward).
To each their situation. To each their own prison. To each their list of insurmountable facts. It's alright, we all have traumas. We're not "pure" or "perfect" or anything like that. We can't be arsed being perfect.
Some of us are shy. Some of us are reclusive. Some of us have been labeled as having a disorder. We can't be arsed restricting ourselves to such "labelizations". Go gutsy.
Some of us have gone through so many "failings" that they deem themselves as failures at life. Personally (and if you were to know my story you'd wonder how the hell I'm not dead already), I can't be arsed defining myself with just that. I define myself with the way I think, the way I act, the way I take things and the way I look. If I'm dissatisfied with one of them, I just can't be arsed hating on myself, it just takes too much energy. Likewise, I can't be arsed acting the same self-displeasing way over and over again.
If I'm grieving a loss or the lack of close people (friends, family, anything) I just can't be arsed stopping to live. Too big of an energy waste to stop living life and moving on. Chances are, you'll meet them again after death (that's where everyone is equal anyway, in death). I can't be arsed grieving them, I'll be seeing them "later".
If they ain't dead, I can't be arsed holding myself from telling them I love them as friends/family. It'd take too much energy to hold a feeling inside. I can't be arsed holding this world of feelings to myself.
I can't be arsed defining myself as people want to define me, I know myself and I just act like I know. I don't care if I'm called "jerk", "asshole", "whatever-slur" because I'm me and I'm a boss because I am me.
I give no damn to the world. I just troll it by being myself. Let me put all "worst-case" scenarios:
- Rape/Child abuse victim? So be it, I'll troll you, my life, by being me and being chill. That jerk got away with it but you know what? That gives me more lemons to make lemonade. More life-trolling essence.
- Gay and rejected by the parents? So be it, I don't need any negative influence. The only influence I need is my own, I go forward (can't be arsed reflecting on what could have been or grieving - read above!). If you're holding yourself from acting homo because "there's a prejudice from the world at large" you fucking can't be arsed. Damn this world, troll it, live life the way you want. Screw all and rock on!
(men/women thing can be applied both sides, I as a man was cheated on numerous times, don't care, can't be arsed)
- Women giving you lemons? So be it, they're women, we're men. They're weird to us, we're weird to them. Your crush is acting mean / irrational / like a utilitarian b****? Can't be arsed, moving on to the next "victim" of your feelings. Your body sending you signals that "the world would collapse if you let go of her or anything"? Can't be arsed, go onto the next one.
- Men giving you lemons? So be it, they're men, we're women. Same weird-weird relation. Men being jerks? Can't be arsed, you're you, they're them. Men cheating? They ain't worth you, can't be arsed elevating them to a pedestal. Move on, rock on and go onto the next victim of your feelings.
- Being belittled by anyone in your family/everywhere? Can't be arsed. Same as below (minus the "call the cops part" - and any self-defense you have is being you and being chill like Tyler).
- Domestic violence? So be it, can't be arsed reminiscing / defining myself as someone who was / is beaten. You know what? If you're a victim of that, take your phone, put its camera on, film it and just bust them to the cops. You don't deserve that life. Move on to something else. They obviously can't be arsed to care about you, you can't be arsed to do the same. If anything, learn self-defense and nullify everything. Fear? Can't be arsed fearing them. You just go HAM and make sure they can't do shit to you. Screw respect, they ain't respecting you to begin with. Gain their respect through resistance and being out for war and then you can allow yourself to respect them.
- Bullying? Can't be arsed with those vermins. Yes, be high and mighty about it. You have something they don't: Yourself, your personality and just you as an individual. Believe me, it's much needed in this world.
- Beaten near-death (and accessorily abused)? Can't be arsed, I'm still alive. If I want to make justice, I'll make it. If I don't (or can't), I can't be arsed, I'm still alive and kicking. That event didn't change much in my life (except that I had to spend tons of time). Lost virginity? Can't be arsed, those people ain't worth your world. You didn't give them your soul. Only way to really lose virginity is to give your soul to the other one while having sex. (they call that making love by then).
- Making the wrong choices in your life? Can't be arsed, you just learnt something new (and your actions are not yourself - you are what you are NOW). I don't care if you're a hobo, you still rock - you know something most people don't. Rock on and move forward! Nothing happening? Can't be arsed living a life empty of passions and dreams. Takes too much effort holding yourself from being imaginative, creative and passionate about whatever comes in front of your face. I just bought a basketball - the desire was way too strong to pick basketball back.
- Don't like your life the way it is? Can't be arsed. I can't be arsed "living in this comfort" when it doesn't comfort me. I can't be arsed keeping to myself how my life should be. I just do it. I just make it happen, screw the current situation, resign from my current job and go full-on on what I want, even if it is going to a monastery in the Tibet forever. I just make it happen. Nothing is impossible for those who really want something and you know what? You really want a change. Don't spend too much energy holding the volcanic desire for change inside. Screw everything. If the people you like don't react positively, have a period of grief and move on. Don't like how tormented you feel? SCREW IT, CAN'T BE ARSED! Go to the last paragraph of this post now!
Anyone who lacks respect to you, you can't be arsed keeping them in your life. Shoo them away, like the disrespectful and ungrateful people they are. They're ungrateful of knowing you, they don't deserve you. Screw them, move on. Can't be arsed keeping them.
The only thing I give a damn is me and the things I hold precious. That doesn't make me selfish because anything and anybody can be precious. I don't give a damn to their input, I only give a damn to their welfare. If their welfare overrides mine then it means there's something to discuss so that both sides are compatible (even if it's your mother/father and they don't like the way you are / what you want to become).
This post is "too cruel" but you feel something in you going bloody? Can't be arsed about cruelty, life is being cruel to you. Troll it.
God would frown if you were to troll life? Can't be arsed, he made you so that you live in the first place. Forgive him for what he throws at you and just move onto the next lemons life throws at you - oh, and make a lemonade stand.
"It is not simple because-" STOP IT! Can't be arsed making excuses! BE YOU! Don't be your excuses, be yourself! You rock, don't let that bitch of an inner voice get you down. Wage war to it and it'll cower in fear of your super might. The only thing it can do is deceive you into believing it's strong. Can't be arsed about it, screw it, bumrush it, butcher it, be total-wrathful to it and just be you! Breathe!
There you go, dude(tte)!
"I may be poor - I may be on welfare, but I AM SOMEBODY." - Jesse Jackson
================ It takes more energy to frown than to smile. Even more deep inside to be sad than serene. You can't be arsed spending your life energy on holding your true self from emerging.
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I don't think the solution to all problems is to just stop caring about them. It sounds like a pretty nihilistic point of view.
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I was waiting for the pitch to buy the book for only one easy payment of 19.99
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Sotamursu - You only stop them from interfering in your life as a human. If the problem persists, the way of dealing with it is to solve it. If it's a past problem, it means that time dealt with it and you can't be arsed with it anymore. If you don't support this, read my last paragraph ;D Now if you aren't depressed, okay, you're entitled your opinion. I'm entitled mine. I went through depression and I'm sharing my own motto.
LOL Kaonis :D - There's no book :p
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You didn't address people who are depressed because of chemical imbalances! HOW DARE YOU.
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On June 04 2011 16:22 TheDeli wrote: If you're reading this post, it means that, right now, you feel gloomy. Or depressed. Even depressive.
Not true! I was just curious what "can't be arsed" meant. After reading, I still have no idea.
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I was going to read this, but I can't be arsed.
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On June 04 2011 16:31 TheDeli wrote: Sotamursu - You only stop them from interfering in your life as a human. If the problem persists, the way of dealing with it is to solve it. If it's a past problem, it means that time dealt with it and you can't be arsed with it anymore. If you don't support this, read my last paragraph ;D Now if you aren't depressed, okay, you're entitled your opinion. I'm entitled mine. I went through depression and I'm sharing my own motto.
LOL Kaonis :D - There's no book :p I've never been depressed myself, even though I'm quite a negative person, but all problems aren't solvable and will exist with you every single second of your life. I'm not sure if I remember correctly, but true depression is not something you just get over by getting over it.
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On June 04 2011 16:36 Lysenko wrote:Show nested quote +On June 04 2011 16:22 TheDeli wrote: If you're reading this post, it means that, right now, you feel gloomy. Or depressed. Even depressive. Not true! I was just curious what "can't be arsed" meant. After reading, I still have no idea. ._. I shall edit the OP :p
On June 04 2011 16:35 Laerties wrote: You didn't address people who are depressed because of chemical imbalances! HOW DARE YOU. T_T Sowwies. Dealing with it requires chemicals? Can't be arsed staying imprisoned by your own mind. If anything, if there's no solution... find the solution? Just an idea being thrown out there.
On June 04 2011 16:36 HuskyMUDKIPZ wrote: I was going to read this, but I can't be arsed. Cruel person is cruel. X3 If you're gloomy or depressed, you gotta read it man ;D
Sotamursu: You have to make a conscious effort to get out of it. You have to deal with everything... Your mind first. I used to be uber-negative about things during my own depression period, like there was no end to the tunnel. And then a switch was flipped.
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I felt good, then I read this blog. (ಥ﹏ಥ)
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Yeah! I can't be arsed to go to work nearly every day for the rest of my life!
Oh wait, I don't have a choice...
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On June 04 2011 16:40 TheDeli wrote:Show nested quote +On June 04 2011 16:36 Lysenko wrote:On June 04 2011 16:22 TheDeli wrote: If you're reading this post, it means that, right now, you feel gloomy. Or depressed. Even depressive. Not true! I was just curious what "can't be arsed" meant. After reading, I still have no idea. ._. I shall edit the OP :p Show nested quote +On June 04 2011 16:35 Laerties wrote: You didn't address people who are depressed because of chemical imbalances! HOW DARE YOU. T_T Sowwies. Dealing with it requires chemicals? Can't be arsed staying imprisoned by your own mind. If anything, if there's no solution... find the solution? Just an idea being thrown out there. Show nested quote +On June 04 2011 16:36 HuskyMUDKIPZ wrote: I was going to read this, but I can't be arsed. Cruel person is cruel. X3 If you're gloomy or depressed, you gotta read it man ;D Sotamursu: You have to make a conscious effort to get out of it. You have to deal with everything... Your mind first. I used to be uber-negative about things during my own depression period, like there was no end to the tunnel. And then a switch was flipped. Well being negative and depressed is not the same thing. I have times when I dont think posetively about stuff but I can still deal with it. It was something different when I broke down and I didnt have enough energy in my body to move myself out of my bed and felt that I didnt care if I died.
To say to someone with a real depression that its in their head is like saying that cancer is placebo. Just because you havnt seen/experianced something doesnt mean it doesnt exist. Maybe changeing the way you think about stuff helped you but for some other people it could have its cause in something else. Threads like this just marginalize people with real deceases.
Edit: Oh, what helped me get better was to sleep for a week and then things felt a little better. Took a couple of months to get back completely.
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On June 04 2011 16:55 Robinsa wrote:Show nested quote +On June 04 2011 16:40 TheDeli wrote:On June 04 2011 16:36 Lysenko wrote:On June 04 2011 16:22 TheDeli wrote: If you're reading this post, it means that, right now, you feel gloomy. Or depressed. Even depressive. Not true! I was just curious what "can't be arsed" meant. After reading, I still have no idea. ._. I shall edit the OP :p On June 04 2011 16:35 Laerties wrote: You didn't address people who are depressed because of chemical imbalances! HOW DARE YOU. T_T Sowwies. Dealing with it requires chemicals? Can't be arsed staying imprisoned by your own mind. If anything, if there's no solution... find the solution? Just an idea being thrown out there. On June 04 2011 16:36 HuskyMUDKIPZ wrote: I was going to read this, but I can't be arsed. Cruel person is cruel. X3 If you're gloomy or depressed, you gotta read it man ;D Sotamursu: You have to make a conscious effort to get out of it. You have to deal with everything... Your mind first. I used to be uber-negative about things during my own depression period, like there was no end to the tunnel. And then a switch was flipped. Well being negative and depressed is not the same thing. I have times when I dont think posetively about stuff but I can still deal with it. It was something different when I broke down and I didnt have enough energy in my body to move myself out of my bed and felt that I didnt care if I died. To say to someone with a real depression that its in their head is like saying that cancer is placebo. Just because you havnt seen/experianced something doesnt mean it doesnt exist. Maybe changeing the way you think about stuff helped you but for some other people it could have its cause in something else. Threads like this just marginalize people with real deceases. Edit: Oh, what helped me get better was to sleep for a week and then things felt a little better. Took a couple of months to get back completely. Dude, all it took to feel better was to sleep it off for a week? I've felt this way every day for 15 years. Maybe I should be on these medicines you talk about... Then again, I know they certainly didn't work for my mother. :/
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Man, I am gonna print this out out nail it to my wall. Exactly what I needed to hear right now.
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As I do think the don't give a fuck attitude can help you with feeling down about certain insecurities, you do very much so marginalize depression. A real depression is like a black void that sucks everything you love down to nullifiy it's importance and happiness it might bring to you. "Cant be arsed" then doesn't make sense because if you would not give a fuck about everything you normally love not giving you pleasure means you don't give a fuck about your life. Which is all you have and are.
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hoenstly this is terrible advice lol
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On June 04 2011 16:36 HuskyMUDKIPZ wrote: I was going to read this, but I can't be arsed.
that makes us two
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NO! YOU MAKE LIFE TAKE BACK THE LEMONS!
GET ANGRY! BURN SOMEONE'S HOUSE DOWN WITH COMBUSTABLE LEMONS!
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I feel many people are misinterpreting a good writing.
The point isn't not to care about your house burning, it's to realize that you have 100 other houses or that the 'fire' is just a fireplace making stuff cozy.
It's about switching to perspectives that are as true or truer than the original 'truth', not about putting on a faking mask.
Many philosophies ranging from ancient(Zen, Advaita Vedanta) to modern (Eckhart Tolle stuff, Byron Katie stuff) great thinkers agree that the problems are born in the mind, but this is not easy to understand until you open your mind.. which is why it's often met with cynicism from the people in the beginning.
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you don't become less depressed by changing perspectives or some other psychology voodoo; you do it by improving your quality of life
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