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Being nice or being an asshole

Blogs > YoonHo
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YoonHo
Profile Blog Joined October 2008
Canada1043 Posts
Last Edited: 2011-02-22 18:27:07
February 22 2011 18:26 GMT
#1
Which is better when it comes to dealing with customer service?

Ever since my family acquired a little store, we've had plenty of time to deal with various customer service. More recently, I've run into a couple of problems with purchasing things online and I had to e-mail or call their customer service to clear up the issues.

The thing is, I act very nice and courteous to these people. Since I work as a cashier, I understand that dealing with people can be absolutely exhausting and irritating. Most of the time, everything goes smooth and perfect. However, there are few instances where nothing gets solved. No matter how nice I am, it seems like I can't get what I want.

On the other hand, we have my sister. She can be downright mean, rude, and in-your-face when it comes to things like this. Surprisingly, the customer service gets everything done to my sister's standards and SOME MORE. There were times when I called the customer service first, and couldn't get anything done. Then, my sister would call, and everything would be taken care of. Only difference is that I acted polite and, I guess in a way, she didn't take shit from them.

I really don't understand this. I hear from the people who work as customer service representatives say, "oh, it would be great if people acted nice and polite. It makes me want to help them even more. I hate assholes blah blah blah." It just seems to me that being nice and polite sucks compared to being a mean, intimidating person. What are your experiences? I'm about to ditch the Mr. Nice persona and become an asshole.

*****
IUFam Golf Wang~ NrGsteve
ffswowsucks
Profile Blog Joined August 2005
Greece2297 Posts
February 22 2011 18:27 GMT
#2
Become an asshole asap. When ur nice people dont take much care of what u say and think oh this guy is an ok guy leave him be.
Terran in particular is a notoriously strong race for a no brain skillhand bot style.
Sm3agol
Profile Blog Joined September 2010
United States2055 Posts
February 22 2011 18:28 GMT
#3
Be both.......Be as nice as you can...until you have to be an asshole. :-)
YoonHo
Profile Blog Joined October 2008
Canada1043 Posts
February 22 2011 18:32 GMT
#4
On February 23 2011 03:27 ffswowsucks wrote:
Become an asshole asap. When ur nice people dont take much care of what u say and think oh this guy is an ok guy leave him be.


See, that's what I think too. When people act intimidating and mean, it seems like they either think, 'k let's just let this person w/e he/she wants' or due to fear, they do w/e to cater to that person's needs.
IUFam Golf Wang~ NrGsteve
`Zapdos
Profile Blog Joined November 2010
United States935 Posts
February 22 2011 18:47 GMT
#5
Be nice, then catch them offgaurd by being an asshole midway through your negotiations. If you can't succeed with being nice, learn to be an asshole to get shit done basically. Only way to survive D:
www.twitch.tv/thezapdos come watch me :]
Rainmaker5
Profile Blog Joined April 2009
United States1027 Posts
February 22 2011 18:50 GMT
#6
Be nice until there's a single hint of a delay or something not going as you plan. Then begin a rant and start to get angry and yell a little. Escalate until you get what you want and then calm down and go back to being nice-ish. Repeat for ever single issue.
(-_(-_(-_(^_(-_(-_(-_-)_-)_-)_-)_-)_-)_-) CJ Fighting! "Beer -> soju -> whisky is a terrible build"~~ Scrarecrow.
HULKAMANIA
Profile Blog Joined December 2004
United States1219 Posts
February 22 2011 18:51 GMT
#7
I don't think that getting what you want in a customer service situation is worth being asshole to someone. I have no doubt that assholes get what they want more than polite individuals, no doubt whatsoever. I just think that it's kind of a self-cheapening thing to do.

The real virtuosity of customer-service interactions lies in being a decent, polite, sympathetic, patient human being who still doesn't take shit. It's a difficult balance to strike, admittedly, but, in my opinion, in terms of human dignity, it beats the shit out of BMing some poor call-center worker in order to get a free month of Xbox Live.
If it were not so, I would have told you.
NIIINO
Profile Blog Joined July 2010
Slovakia1320 Posts
February 22 2011 18:53 GMT
#8
Im using my light side to convince em that they are all wrong, it works perfectly.
But once and im not proud on it i had to be real asshole and i was the meanest kid ever. but it worked out also. Long time ago I read somewhere that you should be asshole on ppl with strong voice and be nice on ppl with low voice. I dont know if it works but you know its worth of try
LaSt)ChAnCe
Profile Blog Joined June 2005
United States2179 Posts
February 22 2011 19:01 GMT
#9
you probably just aren't being clear enough about what you want - try doing that instead
GameTime
Profile Joined May 2010
United States222 Posts
February 22 2011 19:06 GMT
#10
On February 23 2011 03:51 HULKAMANIA wrote:
I don't think that getting what you want in a customer service situation is worth being asshole to someone. I have no doubt that assholes get what they want more than polite individuals, no doubt whatsoever. I just think that it's kind of a self-cheapening thing to do.

The real virtuosity of customer-service interactions lies in being a decent, polite, sympathetic, patient human being who still doesn't take shit. It's a difficult balance to strike, admittedly, but, in my opinion, in terms of human dignity, it beats the shit out of BMing some poor call-center worker in order to get a free month of Xbox Live.

When companies screw with you, you have to screw with them right back. Being nice gets nothing done because you just fall into their cookie cutter problem and "solution" format. When you have been dicked around, the slightest sense you get that the person you are talking to won't solve your problem, immediately ask for a manager. Like you said, these people usually don't deserve it so go straight to the source and it's usually the person who set those policies in the first place. Managers understand that they would rather lose a few dollars here or there to keep their customers but the peons that you talk to first don't have that authority.

For the OP, you don't have to start being an asshole the second you call these places, but you have to ready. Once they basically tell you no or aren't understanding you/helping you, you have to be an asshole, it's the only way. When I was a kid and my original Xbox wasn't connecting to Xbox Live, I tried calling in and seeing if they could help me. I specifically told them nicely that my Xbox was the problem (because my ethernet cable and internet were working) and the dicked around with me telling me to restart my router and stuff even though I knew it was my Xbox that was the problem. These sessions usually ended in them transferring me back and forth to different departments and putting me on hold each time until I hung up. After about 3 attempts of doing this and a few months later, my dad called them and yelled/was an asshole to them. My Xbox was out of warranty and we were still able to send it in and get them to pay for the shipping back because when I first called it was still under warranty. I know it sucks, but you have to play their game and if you raise your voice and get angry, it puts people in a stressful situation and they don't want to lose money, so you can end up getting what you want as long as you stay their customer.
Only the winner deserves to win.
Slaughter
Profile Blog Joined November 2003
United States20254 Posts
February 22 2011 19:07 GMT
#11
You can get what you want by being nice. Your sister didn't get shit done by being an asshole but because she was in their face demanding and forceful about them taking care of it. You can still be forceful and stuff like that but be polite about it (or at least a thin veil of politeness). People often don't do well when faced with aggressive in your face type attitude so they give in more.
Never Knows Best.
Cloud
Profile Blog Joined November 2004
Sexico5880 Posts
February 22 2011 19:26 GMT
#12
Uhm. Being an asshole is usually counterproductive. Maybe it works for customer service since guys in there usually have low self esteem, lol, it's one of the least appreciated jobs in a company. But if you ever get lucky and customer service forwards you to an engineer or whatnot, then being an asshole will never help you.
BlueLaguna on West, msg for game.
udgnim
Profile Blog Joined April 2009
United States8024 Posts
February 22 2011 19:29 GMT
#13
be an asshole until you get to management level then gradually go to nice

E-Sports is competitive video gaming with a spectator fan base. Do not take the word "Sports" literally.
Askalaphos
Profile Blog Joined August 2010
Germany772 Posts
February 22 2011 19:34 GMT
#14
I think the best is acting nice, but let them know, you can instantly switch into "asshole-mode" if it must be.
FavZerg: EffOrt, Jaedong; FavProtoss: Movie, Kal; FavTerran: BaBy, Leta
forgotten0ne
Profile Blog Joined March 2009
United States951 Posts
February 22 2011 19:35 GMT
#15
If you're nice, you have to be extremely manipulative, and even blackmail (in an indirect way, like, "Oh, that's really unfortunate, well I guess if the service can't be fixed I'll just switch my subscription to *someone else*"). Otherwise, being an asshole is about the only way, because it makes them want to be done with you as soon as possible.
"Well it’s obvious that these Terran gamers are just extremely gifted when it comes to RTS games" -Ret, in regards to the first months of SC2
DoubleZee
Profile Joined July 2010
Canada556 Posts
February 22 2011 19:43 GMT
#16
Assholes finish first.
Just think of how stupid the average person is, and then realize half of them are even stupider!
Mr. Wiggles
Profile Blog Joined August 2010
Canada5894 Posts
February 22 2011 19:49 GMT
#17
I act nice and polite, until they start to screw around with me, then it's all asshole from then on out. If they think they can dominate you over the phone, you show them that you won't let them walk all over you.
you gotta dance
DarkPlasmaBall
Profile Blog Joined March 2010
United States45683 Posts
February 22 2011 20:27 GMT
#18
On February 23 2011 04:49 Mr. Wiggles wrote:
I act nice and polite, until they start to screw around with me, then it's all asshole from then on out. If they think they can dominate you over the phone, you show them that you won't let them walk all over you.


I do this too. I try to stay calm and collected until it's clear that I'm being taken advantage of.

I'm of the assumption that not every person on the other side of the phone deserves to be treated like crap. If they're clearly trying to help me, then I can usually understand the situation. If they're bullshitting me, then I'm going to eventually get a little ticked off.

From what I've heard from more aggressive people, guns blazing apparently gets you free stuff a lot of the time >.> But take that with a grain of salt.
"There is nothing more satisfying than looking at a crowd of people and helping them get what I love." ~Day[9] Daily #100
TS-Rupbar
Profile Blog Joined June 2004
Sweden1089 Posts
February 22 2011 20:48 GMT
#19
Be nice. If the person helping you knows what he or she is doing, you becoming angry will only slow them down because they have to apologize. Also remember that the person is only doing his or her job and that it's not that person's fault that you are having problems.

I work with customer service and sometimes it's hard to hear what people are saying when they are mad and then I don't want to ask them what's wrong when I can't hear them because it's so annoying to deal with them. Maybe your problem is that you are describing your problems in the wrong way?
mierin
Profile Joined August 2010
United States4943 Posts
February 22 2011 21:02 GMT
#20
Honestly, I'm with you. I don't understand how the world works sometimes. If you're human and civil, you'll be far behind the guy/girl who is an asshole/douchebag and whines/complains more. It's just how the world works...get used to it or be poor and nice :\
JD, Stork, Calm, Hyuk Fighting!
Saturnize
Profile Blog Joined November 2009
United States2473 Posts
February 22 2011 21:12 GMT
#21
Be a dick, they won't take you seriously if you be too nice. Depends on the situation too. If something can be easily accomplished be nice, but if its something that you don't know will go your way be assertive as hell.
"Time to put the mustard on the hotdog. -_-"
esre
Profile Blog Joined September 2010
Ireland109 Posts
February 22 2011 21:55 GMT
#22
Sound sad and disappointed. . .You'll get way more help than if your aggressive
"Personality should be irrelevant. This is a computer game tournament, not a dating show. -Idra"
Manifesto7
Profile Blog Joined November 2002
Osaka27173 Posts
Last Edited: 2011-02-23 07:52:04
February 22 2011 22:12 GMT
#23
It depends on what kind of person you value being. If you think it is worth making other people feel bad for a slight increase in efficiency, then that is your call.
ModeratorGodfather
Deja Thoris
Profile Blog Joined November 2010
South Africa646 Posts
February 22 2011 22:43 GMT
#24
You don't have to be an asshole to get things done. Take names and get concrete deadlines etc, make people commit.

No nonsense is what you are aiming for, not "best buddy" or "absolute cock"
VonLego
Profile Joined June 2010
United States519 Posts
February 22 2011 22:48 GMT
#25
Nice, yet firm. Don't take flack from people, but being a nice person is a hard to come by trait these days -- don't lose it.
.gypsy
Profile Blog Joined October 2007
Canada689 Posts
February 23 2011 00:09 GMT
#26
yoonho go crossuu storuuu paiibu pee emmuu
https://www.twitch.tv/gypsy93
HULKAMANIA
Profile Blog Joined December 2004
United States1219 Posts
February 23 2011 05:55 GMT
#27
On February 23 2011 04:06 GameTime wrote:
Show nested quote +
On February 23 2011 03:51 HULKAMANIA wrote:
I don't think that getting what you want in a customer service situation is worth being asshole to someone. I have no doubt that assholes get what they want more than polite individuals, no doubt whatsoever. I just think that it's kind of a self-cheapening thing to do.

The real virtuosity of customer-service interactions lies in being a decent, polite, sympathetic, patient human being who still doesn't take shit. It's a difficult balance to strike, admittedly, but, in my opinion, in terms of human dignity, it beats the shit out of BMing some poor call-center worker in order to get a free month of Xbox Live.

When companies screw with you, you have to screw with them right back. Being nice gets nothing done because you just fall into their cookie cutter problem and "solution" format. When you have been dicked around, the slightest sense you get that the person you are talking to won't solve your problem, immediately ask for a manager. Like you said, these people usually don't deserve it so go straight to the source and it's usually the person who set those policies in the first place. Managers understand that they would rather lose a few dollars here or there to keep their customers but the peons that you talk to first don't have that authority.

See that's where I disagree. When companies screw with you, you certainly do not have to screw with them right back. You're free to react to people however you want to; you don't have to let their actions determine yours. You don't have to return evil for evil.

And that's my point: I already acknowledged that being a polite and respectful person will not achieve the same results that being a slobbering douchebag will. I agree. But what I wanted to point out is that being a decent and respectful person to your fellow human beings is worth being occasionally thwarted by customer service. I wanted to point out that acting like an asshole in order to get better service works but that it will tend to trivialize rather than enrich your life.

I realize that last statement borders on mysticism. Nevertheless I stand by it.

On February 23 2011 07:12 Manifesto7 wrote:
It depends on what kind of person you value being. If you think it is work making other people feel bad for a slight increase in efficiency, then that is your call.

And here is my point put into much clearer language. They just don't make forum posters like this guy anymore.
If it were not so, I would have told you.
Deleted User 101379
Profile Blog Joined August 2010
4849 Posts
Last Edited: 2011-02-23 07:18:54
February 23 2011 07:14 GMT
#28
Don't be an a**hole, be nice but also strict. Say precisely what you want and state what you will do if they don't fix your problem, but don't yell at the other person, he can't do much about it. Try to find out if what you want is actually impossible or if the other person is just too low in the food chain to help you. If the support guy can't help you, ask if there is someone you can talk to who can help to fix the problem.

For example when i got my internet connection but hadn't gotten my login details due to a postal error. I explained nice and calm that i will not pay for the time until i can actually use the connection, since it's illogical to pay for something you can't use: I got escalated and got a temporary login that i could immedatly use and noone got yelled at or offended.

Edit/Clarification: As opposed to "common knowledge", most support people actually care and want to help you. In some companies they even get a bonus for solving a customers problem, though even without that most of the time they try their best, but sometimes they just don't have the possibility, so they will gladly escalate you to someone who can help.
nayumi
Profile Blog Joined May 2009
Australia6499 Posts
February 23 2011 07:45 GMT
#29
Be nice to your sister and talk her into doing all the tough work.

Sugoi monogatari onii-chan!
shinwa
Profile Joined April 2010
Sweden225 Posts
February 23 2011 07:54 GMT
#30
Well I work in customer services and from my experience I'd say just being clear with what you want and being firm in your position is the best.

To the people I work with (as I do not longer take calls myself), if someone is being an asshole - we are a lot less inclined to give the caller what he/she wants. However I do believe that we work in a different way than many other customer services, but friendliness goes a very long way.
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