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Is this my life? fuck this shit... - Page 3

Blogs > KTF_CloaK
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zazen
Profile Blog Joined April 2009
Brazil695 Posts
October 23 2010 00:57 GMT
#41
you live in netherlands, smoke some weed man
"The quest for nexus has brought many men of genius to insanity... HUEHUEHUE!"
Impervious
Profile Blog Joined March 2009
Canada4212 Posts
October 23 2010 01:33 GMT
#42
You need to have something really shitty happen in your life at some point, to shock you into realizing "fuck, this is not what I want to be/do". The shock won't happen at that moment, it'll take some time, but it'll happen. I know a bunch of people (myself included) who have had that happen.

For me, a couple of shitty things happened when I was 14. I was such a wreck at the time that a psychologist wanted to have me put into a mental institute (I pretty much told him to fuck off when he asked me to voluntarily submit myself, he threatened to forcefully admit me to it, I called his bluff, and it ended there). I ended up dropping out of high school, drinking, smoking weed, heavier drugs, promiscuous behavior, a really shitty job, and more within a short period of time.

One day, when I was 15, I woke up and was like "fuck this, I don't want to live like this anymore. I want to do something awesome with my life".

Big wall of text incoming:+ Show Spoiler +
I went back to school and graduated with some pretty decent grades (I'm an underachiever, I'll only really do what's necessary to get by, but it's a hell of a huge step up from dropping out). I played on our high school football team (while I had a cast on my arm from breaking it in the first game) when we went to the provincial finals, a feat that no school in our area had ever done, and we were 0-6 the year before. I was the unchallenged captain of the Chess club, which was pretty cool when I led my club to it's first victory (and a demolishing one at that) in a city-wide tournament in over 10 years, against a lot of odds. I've done some awesome things that are definitely not safe for posting on here (I've gotten into some trouble, but it was oh so worth it). When I no longer could play, I helped the coach out, so I got some experience behind the scenes of a football team, which has helped me tremendously since then. I also came up with my own method for solving rubiks cubes of any size, that is roughly as efficient as a standard beginners method at solving a 3 by 3, and actually gets more efficient than traditional methods when the cube gets larger, to the point that I was able to solve a 20X20 in an hour and a half, with an inferior version of my method, whereas if you search for videos on youtube of people using it with traditional methods, it takes them hours, and several thousand moves, more than my method, plus it has no parody errors, and is so freaking simple compared to the other methods. I got accepted into a couple of universities (waterloo was the only one to turn me down, even though they scouted me for their football team), and picked the one I knew that suited me the best. I ran the SC team for the CSL last year, and we made a run for the Eastern finals, which was something I totally did not expect to happen. I had the opportunity to learn a lot about Football when I tried out for the university team, and I'm glad I was cut during training camp, because I couldn't have done the work required for that as well as my school work, and been content with my university experience. I applied some of this knowledge now that I've been helping coach a home-town football team for a younger age group, and it is an awesome feeling to share some of your knowledge with the younger generation (especially since I was always a relatively small player, I had to play it smart and I had to use good technique to keep up, unfortunately, when you're 50 lbs lighter than the 2nd smallest guy in training camp at university, and these guys are smart, and they use good form, you're pretty much fucked, so I do know a lot about my football), as well as helping the coach out, and seeing how much they all actually appreciate it. Now I've started (with the help of someone else) a Starcraft club in our university (as well as running the team again this year), and we're planning on expanding it to other e-sports, as well as trying to get competitive status (and we have a good shot at getting it next year, which is a big deal, because even our mens soccer team does not have the competitive status and they have been doing really, really well in provincial tournaments). I've also helped shape the direction that the student society of my faculty is headed in. Being a frosh guide this year was a fucking blast. And I've done more things that I definitely can't post here, that have been soooo worth it. IMO, I've done a lot of awesome things in the last 7 years (I'm 22 now, and in 3rd year university). And I'm sure I've missed a bunch of things as well.

The thing is, I wouldn't have had the desire, or the willpower to do any of this, if it hadn't been for something "waking me up". I'm not sure how else to describe it. But because of this, I'm a firm believer that "you are the sum of your past experiences". I wouldn't be who or where I am now if it wasn't for that. And I've seen this same type of thing from others as well, so I know I'm not alone when it comes to this type of relatively sudden behavior change.

Maybe you're having that "wakeup call" right now. If that's the case, you need to pick a direction you want your life to head in (obviously one that makes sense) and go make it a reality. But, as a suggestion, the direction you go should involve some kind of education past high school. Whether that be a trade college, university, an apprenticeship, whatever, it will help you so much in the long run, because you will be able to get a more stable, successful, rewarding career. Also, any kind of post-secondary education will give you amazing networking opportunities.

But you need to get out there and do stuff. I know that I wanted to do nothing more than play Gran Turismo during my time where I wasn't working, getting drunk, or getting high at your age, so I know the feeling you have for Starcraft (especially since I was actually really good at any racing game and won some tournaments at the time). I've barely touched the game since then (although I know I'll play GT5 when it comes out, it's too bad it was delayed again), and I can definitely say that my life has been much better because of it. There is absolutely nothing wrong with playing games, don't get me wrong, but when it gets to the point that it affects other parts of your life, you need to take a step back and re-evaluate the situation, especially since you won't naturally realize gaming is hurting your situation, not helping it, because of how it makes you feel good at the time but consumes the rest of your life in the process.

GL, and go do something kick-ass as well!
~ \(ˌ)im-ˈpər-vē-əs\ : not capable of being damaged or harmed.
blue_arrow
Profile Blog Joined July 2008
1971 Posts
October 23 2010 02:04 GMT
#43
You should always follow your dreams; work at the store for just a couple more months/years and save up, then buy a new computer and a ticket to korea and practice until you are one of the best players. If you're not doing that great in school right now and you also don't have an interest in it anyways, you should just focus on your goals and dreams. Afterwards you can become a commentator or a coach or something. Anything is possible as long as you put your mind to it. GLHF
| MLIA | the weather sucks dick here
Galois
Profile Blog Joined August 2010
United States124 Posts
Last Edited: 2010-10-23 07:05:55
October 23 2010 07:04 GMT
#44
On October 23 2010 06:21 KTF_CloaK wrote:
But I mean why should I?


in the movie called the twilight samurai there is a scene where the uncle of the family visits from far off. he sees that the father is making his daughters go to school and the uncle tells the father off in front of the children, saying that education has no purpose in the real world.

later that night the older daughter asks the father why is education more important than the money that she could better spend her time helping his father weave baskets to get them more money to help the family.

i think his response to that would be a good answer to your question

i tried skipping through the movie on youtube to find that part, but i must've missed it. i think you should look at it.
It's gonna take a lot to drag me away from you / There's nothing that a hundred men or more could ever do
Caphe
Profile Blog Joined May 2007
Vietnam10817 Posts
October 23 2010 07:21 GMT
#45
Becoming progamer or not, first thing first. At least finish you K-12 education with good grade. Get some SC2 along the way ofc. Then if you decide to go for progamer life, starts at 18 years old is not late at all.
If you kicked your education right now to go into SC2...later you may end up with nothing.
And waking up @ 6AM to watch PL is COOL, pls keep doing that
Terran
ryanAnger
Profile Blog Joined April 2008
United States838 Posts
Last Edited: 2010-10-23 09:15:20
October 23 2010 09:11 GMT
#46
On October 23 2010 08:38 travis wrote:
Show nested quote +
On October 23 2010 08:36 Hypnosis wrote:
On October 23 2010 08:34 travis wrote:
do whatever you want with your life
older people will tell you how to be like them, or how they want to be
(sure they are probably telling you what they think is best but they are not all knowing and most people have lost sight of what life is actually about)

just be true to yourself and try to be good and try to improve yourself. things will work out


but, u may be posed with challenges later on in life if u try to do something like become a pro gamer.



Telling a 15 year old to be "true to himself" is like handing a baby a paintball gun, it may not kill it but he could shoot his balls off or something..


riiiiiight

anyways i think it's our own job to find out how inexperienced and unwise we are

we shouldn't be told that's the case and then to just do what the other person tells us

if you want to take advice from your elders that's fine(they do know a lot more than you!)
if you want to ignore them and do what you want that's fine to

just be good. mistakes are yours to be made

some of the most successful people ever completely ignored advice from their elders


I'm going to have to agree with Travis here. Personally, I'm in a place in my life, where I'm not happy in the slightest, and I can attribute nearly 90% of my unhappiness to doing something that I did not want to do (join the military). I joined because I was pressured by my parents, and society in general, and just did what everyone told me to do.

Had I followed my dreams, and did what I wanted, I would be in a much happier place right now, even if I was dirt poor, and for now (at least the next 4 years) I have to deal with the unhappiness.

So, long story short. Do what makes you happy, first and foremost, and if you have any doubts, talk about them with someone you trust, who isn't going to give you a biased answer.
On my way...
d1v
Profile Blog Joined September 2007
Sweden868 Posts
October 23 2010 11:57 GMT
#47
Stay in school, get good grades, wait until you're 20 and hopefully off to college and life's going to be a blast. Hang in there!
Adams Æbler
bmml
Profile Joined December 2009
United Kingdom962 Posts
October 23 2010 13:09 GMT
#48
Ah, to be 15 again! Best advice I can give you is to simply keep at it, life will throw everything at you but it's all worth it.
Lexpar
Profile Blog Joined March 2009
1813 Posts
October 23 2010 14:36 GMT
#49
Don't sweat it dude! Life gets better and better as you grow up. I'm a couple months a way from my 18th. As awful as it feels, awkward pre-pubescence does go away. It's some terrible cosmic joke that a good chunk of guys go through most of highschool in this akward phase. Thats okay though because college! lol.

Keep with the games if they make you happy. Follow your bliss man
NIIINO
Profile Blog Joined July 2010
Slovakia1320 Posts
October 23 2010 14:43 GMT
#50
Time to man up ! u have a job n1 ! you will stop hate school when u will get better marks u dont have to learn a lot home just have fun and learn everything in school its easy mode. If you cant learn math how do you want to count minerals ? :D
do something for yourself, go run maybe try to have fun with your friends?
sylverfyre
Profile Joined May 2010
United States8298 Posts
October 23 2010 17:10 GMT
#51
If you've got a job, can't you save up for a computer + SC2? My first job was shitty as hell too, (at a pizza joint, like 10 years ago) but having income so you can buy yourself nice stuff is so good.

I respect your desire to rise to greatness as a progamer, but stay in school, really. What if you DID drop out and dedicate 8h/day to gaming, and didn't make the cut? D:
SkyLegenD
Profile Joined February 2010
United States304 Posts
October 24 2010 01:12 GMT
#52
this is my future. I AM GONNA BE A PROGAMER IN SC2


This is where gaming becomes addiction for the average teen. Stay in school. You won't regret it.
"Victory belongs to the most persevering." - Napoleon Bonaparte
OutlaW-
Profile Blog Joined July 2010
Czech Republic5053 Posts
October 24 2010 01:19 GMT
#53
I am sorry but you seem to represent what has become of the kids nowadays, people with plans/dreams of achieving something while having no motivation/willpower/mindset to do anything.
Delete your post underage b&. You're incestuous for you're onee-chan so you're clearly not a bad guy, but others might not agree
iMAniaC
Profile Joined March 2010
Norway703 Posts
October 25 2010 10:45 GMT
#54
My advice would be to focus everything else you do onto SC, if you're really that much into it. Think about how stuff you do will give you a benefit in competitive gaming.

For example:
-Get a good night's sleep. Waking up at 6am is perfectly okay, but you have to go to a bed a little earlier to make up for it (getting preferably about 8hrs of sleep, perhaps even more. I needed almost 9 hours every night when I was your age (I'm 25 now) ). If you're rested and not tired, your brain will function better and you'll be more focused. You'll get more out of wathcing replays, catching details and so on, and you will remember build orders/counters/whatever better.
Moreover, if you regularly wake up at 6, it might be a good idea to wake up at 6 every day, so you'll get a regular rhythm.

-Start to work out. If you're in good health, you'll perform better in SC. You'll get better stamina, so that you'll last those 45+minute matches better. Or just imagine a Bo5, going to five matches, two of them stretching 45 minutes. You're looking at 2,5 hours of gaming. If you want to perform your best, you need to be in really good shape. Also, working out can be combined with SC too. Like jogging or bicycling on the spot, in front of the monitor, watching Day9 or whatever. Or you can get outside and listen to SC podcasts or plan build orders or whatever while running.
Also, as others have mentioned, you'll produce endorphines, which will make you happy. Not kidding. State of mind is not only what you think in your mind, it's what kind of hormones and substances your body is producing. If you work out, your body will produce happy-substances and you'll be happy.
Also, you said you were kind of chubby. Don't know to which extent that is, but be aware that if you go from chubby to fat, you'll start having fat inside your blood vessels, clogging up your precious flow of oxygen to your brain. And you need that oxygen to make fast and good decisions in SC. Working out and eating healthy food will help you become better in SC.

-Don't drop out of school. What you learn there is actually important. You need math in order to understand SC. When your Korean coach shows you a graph, you need to be able to understand it. You need to understand diminishing returns, percentages and probability calculations as well as geometry and simple physics. Moreover, learning those things will precondition your brain to learn other things, so that you'll learn new, SC related stuff, easier.
You'll need to learn foreign languages and grammar, so that you'll be able to pick up Korean more easily once you move there. Knowing what a subject, object etc in a sentence is, might be curcial for learning Korean fast. Also, reflecting upon Turkish might be a very smart thing to do, as it's so different from Dutch and English. Knowing a couple of so different languages might help you to learn Korean.
All history and society lessons are important. As you'll be moving to a different country with a different culture, knowing how society works and knowing history may help you to understand human behaviour, see the similarities and differences in Korean and West European culture and make you adapt to Korean society more easily.
And keep in mind that learning in itself is valuable, as it's teaching you to learn. Of course, if you never learn from your playing, you'll stagnate and never become a progamer. So learning how to learn is important.

-Also, keep in mind that Korean culture is very different from West European culture. Koreans are not as straight forward and don't say things as explicitly as Europeans, so don't neglect your social skills. Continue to hang out with your girl friends, as girls too, often say something else than they mean Moreover, human interaction (as opposed to sitting alone in front of the computer) will often lead to a better quality in life. Also, Koreans value education very highly. Not going to university is inthinkable to most Koreans, and you're thinking about not even going to high school...

All this can be seen as training for your Korean progaming career. But then consider this:

Some of the refugees from North Korea, the most oppressive country in the world, in which every house has a propaganda radio and they're 10 cm shorter than their southern brethren because they don't get enough food, some of those refugees, actually voluntarily go back to North Korea because they couldn't fit into South Korean society! There's chance you might just not be able to fit in, and get so miserable over there that you want to go back to the Netherlands. What then, if you don't have any education? Doing all-ins is okay in StarCraft, because there's always another game, but doing all-ins in life is very, very risky. And dropping out of school is an all-in manoeuver. Don't do it. But keep gaming while at the same time working out, going to school and hanging out with friends. And try to get the most out of every minute you do. Then, you can move to Korea as soon as you've finished high school, or perhaps even try to get a stipend and take high school in South Korea. Then after having completed high school and having spent a couple of years gaming in Korea, if your progaming career doesn't work out, you can still go to university or something.

That's my advice.
LoStYouRSkiLLS
Profile Joined February 2008
Australia223 Posts
October 25 2010 12:28 GMT
#55
Get drunk and actually have fun, rather than 'life is boring' and doing nothing about it.
Terror Australis [ http://www.clan-ta.com ] - TALoSt - http://www.twitch.tv/LoStYouRSkiLLs
Frits
Profile Joined March 2003
11782 Posts
Last Edited: 2010-10-25 13:19:36
October 25 2010 12:55 GMT
#56
solid advice from a fellow dutchman: work hard and get good grades and go to HBO / universiteit, get a scholarship that's easy as shit to pay back and enjoy the rest of your life doing a satisfying and fun job

if you're bored just join a 'studentenvereniging', don't fuck up in high school or it will haunt you the rest of your life

DO NOT DROP OUT

also, Flash got good grades during his progamer career, he never completely left school as i understand it, if you aspire to be like him just play in your spare time and see how far you get

On October 23 2010 09:57 zazen wrote:
you live in netherlands, smoke some weed man


the guy is 15 years old, only fucking losers smoke weed at that age here

On October 23 2010 11:04 blue_arrow wrote:
You should always follow your dreams; work at the store for just a couple more months/years and save up, then buy a new computer and a ticket to korea and practice until you are one of the best players. If you're not doing that great in school right now and you also don't have an interest in it anyways, you should just focus on your goals and dreams. Afterwards you can become a commentator or a coach or something. Anything is possible as long as you put your mind to it. GLHF


Do you people even realize that your retarded advice can ruin lives or something? In Holland you're NOTHING without an education, instead of encouraging him to follow some path to ruin you should tell him to grow up like we all did.
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