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I attended my first funeral ever today. I'm pretty lucky, being almost 18 and I haven't experienced a close death in the family/friends.
Today was one of my best friends grandfather's funeral. I had met him once or twice, but I hadn't ever really gotten to know him. The family was pretty chinese, and his English wasn't the best (from what I remember).
Anyways, I was surprised at how emotional I became during the service. I'm a pretty emotional guy in general; I'm not that guy who wasn't cried since he was 4 or that guy who's never shed a tear during a movie. Even so, I was expecting myself to hold together pretty well.
However, five or six tears (if i counted correctly) were shed, most notably in the Eulogy. I knew that was doing to be emotionally hard, especially for the family members of Grandfather Richard.
There isn't really a "point" to this blog, I just felt like writing this stuff down. My father is very old for my age, being 67, and I can't help but think about how absolutely shitty I will feel when he dies. He's had a vast array of health issues and while he's a trooper, we all go at some point.
Today showed me just how lucky I have actually been, not having had the unluck of attending a funeral before now.
So, in closing, I wish my condolences to everyone who has lost someone or multiple people close to them. I can start to understand how hard it is.
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I fear not death, for our straight is eternal
Fenix
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You are pretty lucky dude. My first death of a close family member was when I was 10, my grandad who had died after a long fight with various diseases. He passed away peacefully from Pnuemonia. The next one that was close was my other grandfather right before my Bar Mitzvah, when my family was out of town, who passed away from cancer. All in all, your experience was pretty calm . EDIT: Thinking about it now, I've attended a lot of funerals O.o, those are just a couple.
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United States24483 Posts
Good or bad, funerals are one of those things that you kinda get 'used to.' (of course a close loss is a big hit no matter what)
Knowing that your older relatives/family are possibly getting close to death is depressing, but if they generally have their health that's a huge plus and you should definitely focus on enjoying their livelihood rather than worrying about it.
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I've always hated attending funerals. They're extremely depressing, regardless of the fact that you get to meet family/friends that you haven't seen in ages. It's because of the stern atmosphere and the obligation to look sad in the funeral place (well at least for where I live; but I think it's pretty conventional to have to not look happy at funerals).
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Reminds me of my own grandmother's passing. Little more than a year ago today.
It was the first time I had ever seen my own mother cry in the 22 years I had been walking the earth.
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On January 06 2013 12:55 Enders116 wrote: Reminds me of my own grandmother's passing. Little more than a year ago today.
It was the first time I had ever seen my own mother cry in the 22 years I had been walking the earth.
Indeed, I saw my father (who never cries) with one tear just out of his eye. It was quite surprising
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On January 06 2013 12:37 micronesia wrote: Good or bad, funerals are one of those things that you kinda get 'used to.' (of course a close loss is a big hit no matter what)
this is pretty true. i've been to a few funerals (7) and i'm only 20, and they were all fairly close to me. i've lost a few grandparents and some good friends. at my first funeral (my grandmother's) i cried a bit, same goes for the next one. then after that not so much, even though i've had people who were closer than they were to me die. i guess you start to sort of realize the inevitability of death and get 'used to' it.
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Like some guys mentioned above, with time you get used to funerals, I'm 23 and all of my Grandparents are dead plus my mother and her brother just passed away aswell. Nowadays when I got funerals I don't really care about the service to be honest. Also everyone handles differently when they loose someone from the family. For me for example my mother's dead was a huge motivation in life and I just keep going on and try to be a better person. Certainly you can't be prepared for someones death but you can prepare yourself for life!
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Don't worry about the inevitable. There's no way for you to change the facts of life. Enjoy life for what it is right now and just don't worry about the facts of life that are unchangeable.No reason to get upset over something that you can't change, right?
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But because of this, you grow up, you grow and learn to treasure those you love even more than you do now, and not to take them for granted.
You will get stronger and better from this!
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