I’m not talented. I’ve never been talented. If anything, I am the epitome of normality in suburban America. Grew up in the suburbs of Chicago, went to a catholic school, was moderately introverted, and never got in trouble. It was when I was 11 I believe, when I discovered brood war at a friend’s house. I must have lost 10 or 15 games that day alone. Same scenario every time, I would go 1 base battle cruiser and my friend would build 12 devourers and 12 guardians and come kill me just as I started getting my BC’s up, then I would leave. And I loved it. I went to that friend’s house almost every game and just got bopped.
Then, one day, I made an incredible discovery. I built marines, and sent them across the map, and killed him. I was so happy. Not only because I won the game, but because I realized that this game had depth. This wasn’t a game like call of duty where you just shoot things, this wasn’t like rock band where you just hit notes, this was Starcraft, and it was special. I was hooked. Unfortunately, my computer at home was too recent, and it couldn’t run starcraft well(first world problems). So I was content with playing at my friend’s house. That was until starcraft 2 came out.
I spent the entire summer before sc2 came out watching husky and day9 videos, getting so hype about this game. I still remember watching the vod of white-ra vs. idra in the HDH invitational where white-ra barely blocked off the choke, I think it was on steppes of war. What a moment for me, sitting there realizing that this was legitimate. Others thought starcraft was special too.
So I eventually go to high school and join the crew(rowing) team. Through all this, I experienced the biggest change in my life. I used to have huge self-esteem issues. Like go to see a psychiatrist level huge. As I said, I’m not talented. I’m not super attractive or fit. So I had trouble realizing what I was good at. What made me special? So all I really did was crew and starcraft. Once Sc2 finally launched, I got it on release date and hopped right in. I played on a laptop, sometimes with a mouse sometimes on the track pad, and with an awful internet connection. I was placed into bronze, played random, sucked horribly, and loved it. I wasn’t allowed to play during the week because I was a studious nerd, but every weekend was just starcraft. If I wasn’t playing, I was watching a tournament or stream, and If I wasn’t doing that I was thinking of starcraft. Just thinking about it.
And no one knew. I didn’t preach about starcraft. I was scared of what everyone else would think. My entire family thought it the fact that I loved this video game this much so weird. They would ask why I didn’t follow basketball or football or “normal people” sports. But I just kept playing starcraft. Eventually I started moving up the ranks slowly. One season in bronze, a couple in silver, a couple in gold, a ton in platinum, and after two years, in the summer before I went off to college, I went straight through diamond and hit masters. Holy shit, I’m in masters. Ive played like 4000 games and enjoying myself so much that I didn’t realize I was actually not awful at this game anymore. It was late the night I got the promotion, and I got so excited I woke up my entire family screaming celebrating by myself.
And no one cared. Not my family, not my friends, no one. To them I was playing a game. I tried explaining to people, but the only way I knew how was essentially to say “Hey, I spent a lot of time doing this thing. And I got pretty good at it. I’m good at something!” But they still didn’t understand. Esports didn’t mean anything to anyone. But I didn’t let it get me down. I was determined to try to become the best. I wanted to be on the mlg stage. I wanted to gangnam style while getting champagne sprayed at me and get flipped over and accidently kick lauren elise in the face after I win nasl season a million. I want to go to korea, and get an all kill in the gstl. I would lay in bed when I couldn’t sleep daydreaming about what celebrations I would perform and what I would say if I got interviewed. It was truly a dream of mine.
So I go off to college (Seattle University, PM me if you go here!), way far away from Chicago. A much different, much more accepting city. I wanted to go to university of Washington and try to be on their csl team, so I was a little disappointed when I didn’t get in. So off to Seattle University I go. I was a bit worried about what my roommate would think about my starcraft. The second night, he comes home while I’m playing a game, and he was like “woah, how do you know what you’re doing? You’re fast as hell.” My first reaction was (Oh stop it you), but afterwards I was like “you think I’m good? People are pro at this who play 3 times as fast as I do.” (my apm is like 100) He actually thought that was cool. He respected it as something. I was in shock. As I went on here, I met more and more people who respect esports. I talked to a guy with a day9 shirt, met a masters protoss, and had a girl ask me if I could beat Koreans all in the first three days. I knew I was in the right place. Unfortunately we don’t have a csl team here, but I’m gonna try and get one started.
So, I guess all of this is to say, you don’t have to be talented in this industry. This entire industry is based on hard work and commitment. I am currently a masters league zerg. I love the starcraft community and the fighting game community and any esports community and really anyone who respects video games as much as I do.
So…Hi. My name is Brian a.k.a. Drej, and whether or not I ever do anything big in this scene, That’s okay, I will always be playing starcraft and supporting the scene. And that makes me happy.