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On May 09 2013 09:30 Lauriel wrote:Show nested quote +On May 09 2013 09:28 Chessz wrote:On May 09 2013 09:23 cactusjack914 wrote:Dude, you're 27 ? You seriously need guidance if this is how you are acting. Quit starcraft and see a psychologist. To everyone saying "quit and get professional help," thank you for your input, but I'm not going to respond, simply because it's a last resort, and I'm looking for solutions that will prevent me from going to that end. ....Wait, so you make a long post seeking advice, people give you advice, and you turn around and say "im not going to respond". Figure it out by yourself then. Seriously. If a large number of people offered the suggestion of getting pro help, in response to the details given in the OP, wouldn't you take it seriously? Most people can't offer other "alternative solutions" because they don't experience such abnormal behavior/displays. For those people a proper solution might be to take breaks, play unranked, stream to your friends/get feedback etc. For OP THO, it's obvious you should get some help. So that's why we're telling you. You can go ahead and "not respond" (is anyone sensing an immaturity underneath OP's writing?) but.. why even make the topic to begin with then? Don't misunderstand. My not responding has nothing to do with not seeing the validity of the opinion. I'd just like to avoid it if I can, and there's not much to say in response to it. I understand that it's a very real option, but I'm looking for alternative solutions first.
Okay then. Well I suggest what I wrote already, in addition to a stress squeezy ball, or something. I've heard some people will play 10 games and then make a workout given how many games they lost. 5 games lost = 50 pushups or 5 miles run or something. I don't know man. I really feel like you need to seek a professional given the extremity of what you said.
This whole thing feels like a facebook post with emo lyrics..
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first off, some huge idiots in this thread based on the "advice" they're giving... "grow up" yeah, i'm sure that'll solve the problem brilliant advice that will focus on the core issues at hand.
I used to rage very hard, but my life isn't nearly as nice as yours.
What cured it is I had to set goals before my matches, and also I started playing a lot of un ranked.
I found that a lot of what was ticking me off was mis clicks that costs me games. Stuff that was my own fault and made me feel terrible.
I still get very irritated sometimes, but my advice to you is to set a goal before each game.
Your goal for one game should be "ok i wanna not get supply blocked all game long, I don't care if I win or lose, it doesn't matter that's not the objective which is simply don't get supply blocked"
Then your next one can be "okay minerals don't get over a thousand all game long, doesn't matter if I win IN FACT i wanna lose so I know why exactly I lost while I was keeping my money low"
Clear, distinct goals, not just "win or get mad"
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It's incredible that there are so many shitty people here giving useless advice. People feel anger because there are chemicals in the brain inducing the anger and it is NOT A CHOICE whether you are angry or not. Telling someone to just not be angry anymore is the same as telling a sad person to "man up and stop crying, it's just a movie" or telling someone with pain to stop feeling the pain or telling someone who is gay to stop being gay. It doesn't work like that.
I am a very copetetive person myself and get angry from time to time too, though not as bad as you. Back in the day I used to play handball and I barely ever raged. I think it is very likely, that regular physical activity reduces anger.
Another point might be the food you eat. I'm not sure but I think it might be unwise to eat sweets all the time while gaming. It's just anecdotical evidence at best but it can't hurt to try to have regular eating sessions and not so much in the meantime.
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I dunno, try to think about how actually insignificant the game is? I pretty much never rage, ever. The most I ever feel is "damn I really fucked that up, that was dumb." And the main reason I have this mentality? Because you just have to look at your life from the outside. Like me, your life seems to be in a pretty damn good situation.
I have a day job as well that I love, has an awesome career path, pays above what I expected to make out of college, and pays for my further educational development. Starcraft is what I do when I'm home from work, when I relax. I don't give a shit about what happens in the game because my real priority is my work at the moment. That's what I need to "do better at."
I couldn't care less if I lose at Starcraft, it's why I play random, it's why I do random ass strats on a whim, etc. Who gives a fuck about getting better at this game? It accomplishes almost nothing positive in your daily life, regardless of how "competitive of a person you are." It doesn't get you in better shape like a physical sport does, in fact it will most likely do the opposite. In no way does it bolster your social skills. It's not going to make you money.
It's just something you do for fun, to kill time. Just try to laugh at how silly shit is in the game instead. Everytime someone rages, just laugh to yourself. When someone tells me to kill myself, I actually crack up out loud, because I think of the difference in importance the game holds over them vs me. When someone says something childish like "u mad bro?" or "HAHAHA YOU'RE RAGING RIGHT NOW HAHAHA" I laugh as well because they honestly just don't understand how little I care. And I play the game a fucking lot, 8,000+ games since release, former GM, often top of masters as random (ie. top 50 overall). Just take a step back, and release, there's absolutely no reason to give a shit about the game more than as a past time.
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On May 09 2013 09:30 Lauriel wrote:Show nested quote +On May 09 2013 09:28 Chessz wrote:On May 09 2013 09:23 cactusjack914 wrote:Dude, you're 27 ? You seriously need guidance if this is how you are acting. Quit starcraft and see a psychologist. To everyone saying "quit and get professional help," thank you for your input, but I'm not going to respond, simply because it's a last resort, and I'm looking for solutions that will prevent me from going to that end. ....Wait, so you make a long post seeking advice, people give you advice, and you turn around and say "im not going to respond". Figure it out by yourself then. Seriously. If a large number of people offered the suggestion of getting pro help, in response to the details given in the OP, wouldn't you take it seriously? Most people can't offer other "alternative solutions" because they don't experience such abnormal behavior/displays. For those people a proper solution might be to take breaks, play unranked, stream to your friends/get feedback etc. For OP THO, it's obvious you should get some help. So that's why we're telling you. You can go ahead and "not respond" (is anyone sensing an immaturity underneath OP's writing?) but.. why even make the topic to begin with then? Don't misunderstand. My not responding has nothing to do with not seeing the validity of the opinion. I'd just like to avoid it if I can, and there's not much to say in response to it. I understand that it's a very real option, but I'm looking for alternative solutions first.
your case is more extreme and most people don't think that alternative solutions like working out after a loss is going to help. remember that you're betting your own health here. is playing sc2 so important that you're willing to risk damaging your hands more permanently or crashing your car while you try to find an alternative solution that works?
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Hi Lauriel. A serious reply.
I got the same problem like you where I feel that I really can't control myself after a loss just bursting out rage. I don't think its easy for people who don't experience it to understand. I have no problem in losing in sports irl and other stuff but when it comes to starcraft and sometimes other games there comes unstoppable rage after losses. Although it has gotten better for me now than before its still there and I write stuff to opponents that I later regret. (And yes ive done worse stuff like destroyed a monitor and slammed a door, even got complete nuts etc) I stand by the point that its a behavior that have been learned and that it also can be changed. I think you should think through what you are focusing on, if you are focusing on avoiding to lose or focusing on the positive stuff like improving and winning. For me personally I know its my fear of losing, the shame that comes with it and me failing to live up to my expectations that causes my rage. Also I think that the constant talk about balance and imbalance from the community makes people feel like the game is unfair to them in many situations when playing. I played classic piano before infront of audience but I never really could handle the pressure because of the nerves(I started to shake alot when playing, ran out of stage two times even). That I still have the same issues when playing starcraft where there is no audience makes me believe that the nerves which imo also causes the rage comes from the high expectations and fear of failure. I think what you should also bring with you is that just cause you are losing that does not mean that someone is smarter, more talented or generally a better person than you, it just means they worked harder(or in a better way) to perfect their game play. Also accept that working with the behavior probably will take long time. Im still having quite some problems but atleast it has gotten better.
Hope some off this stuff can help you on your journey
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i feel like most people rage because of embarrassment. Just realize no one thinks you are good at this game and you have nothing to be embarrassed about being bad Stop judging yourself and you will probably rage less.
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I work at a psych hospital, albeit in the business office, but I deal with patients from time to time and I've been exposed to it long enough (had to chase down and take down a runaway patient my first month on the job). And honestly, from reading your 1-4 behaviors, you would meet criteria to be admitted into our hospital.
- High Risk Behaviors - Aggressive Behaviors - Destructive Behaviors - Danger to self and Danger to others - Irritability - Poor Impulse Control
I've had to do assessments for admitting patients before. In my opinion, go to a psych hospital and let them do an assessment on you, they do them for free. If you don't know which psych hospital to go to (because different ones have different specialties) or do not live close to one, go to an emergency room. They will do an assessment for you and send you to the nearest and most appropriate facility.
If you meet their criteria for admission and you want to go to seek help, don't freak out about it or get nervous. Don't think of it as a scary place you will have to stay at for years. You honestly come in and stay for around 7 days (the average at our hospital). You'll see the doctor for a long period of time the first day, and then for shorter periods everyday after that. You'll be in group therapy sessions. Depending on the hospital you'll be in a group with others with similar problems, or if it's a small place you'll have group with everyone on your unit (adult male, though some places have the females mixed). You'll get fed 3 meals a day minimum, be able to watch TV and relax with other patients. There is typically smoke breaks and gym time as well. There will also be visiting times, so your loved ones (the ones you want to know you're actually there) can visit. It could be a great experience for you; if you feel you really need to seek help.
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Maybe you feel like your life is so perfect and that you are so perfect that you cannot accept losing at a video game?
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If one of the reasons is because you want to practice something on ladder, and your opponent does something preventing that (like cheesing or early aggression), I think it would be helpful to re-think what it is to ladder for you.
I think if you can 1) change your mindset of the ladder 2) understand that nothing is personal 3) the result of a game is close to meaningless
your rage will decrease.
I think you should write out for yourself what the ladder is, what you think it is, and how that's different than the former.
Many people feel angry or cheated when they get cut off driving. They feel as if it's a personal attack on them, when in reality the person who cut them off probably just needed to get into that lane to exit, or was just moving into the passing lane, or something else entirely and they didn't realize it was something that would anger the person behind them. You might be feeling something similar. If that's the case, you need to somehow convince yourself (and maintain that mentaility while gaming) that the people you face on ladder aren't personally attacking you by cheesing or executing some other strategy, no matter what it is. Sure, some people might be trolling, but that's not personal either.
I would also recommend watching people who aren't effected by losses. Try to get inside their heads. Try to emulate them. I suggest watching TLO, Snute (though i haven't seen him stream for awhile), or Grubby. Try to grasp why it is they don't seem bothered by it. The mindset is similar to more traditional sports. You don't see people rage when they have someone dribble past them (in soccer or basketball), or if they drop a pass, have a bad touch, miss a shot etc etc. The best always keep playing, they don't let mistakes weigh them down for the remainder of the game. If they did they wouldn't be where they are. Understand that it's just part of the game, and maybe instead of thinking about each game of SC separately, think about it as one continuous game. Losing a game is just making bad touch or having the ball stolen from you. Just get it back. You don't punch the wall, or blame the person who was guarding you, you simply try to get it back. How do you get the ball back in SC? Press play again and try and win
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On May 09 2013 08:52 rANDY wrote: Sounds like you should stop playing SC2, no game is worth this. Find another hobby that does not affect you so negatively. just quoting this to say that this is absolutely the worst thing you can do. this doesn't help you deal with your anger and something later in your life could trigger more anger issues, and you still wont know how to deal with it.
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if it's only limited to sc2, that would be very strange indeed. Are you sure you don't get it doing something else?
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On May 09 2013 09:01 Lauriel wrote:Show nested quote +On May 09 2013 08:55 Whatson wrote: What makes you rage like this? Is it because you find some strategy to be really stupid, do you feel like you outplayed your opponent but still lost, or are you more frustrated by your own mistakes?
EDIT: Or are you just made whenever you lose, regardless of the reason? It depends. Losing several games in a row and often times to cheeses or strategies that prevent me from practicing what I want can set it off. That's the biggest thing.
I know you said cheese isn't the only reason, but in the cases when it is the cause, just remember that cheeses or allins are valid strategies and make a mental note to look out for them next time or try to alter your build so that it is safe against that particular strategy.
Many people seem to think that they were somewhat cheated or that their opponent was inferior when they lose to cheese or allins, but the fact is that if you played greedy or blind and lost because of it, you have no one to blame but yourself (which I see you said you already do) but it's not worth raging at because you can easily see what your mistake was and become better for it.
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On May 09 2013 09:13 FromShouri wrote: No one is going to give a shit about your leet starcraft skills, nor will you ever get good enough to play in GSL or MLG and get a good ranking. Perfect role model
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On May 09 2013 09:42 Sephiren wrote:If one of the reasons is because you want to practice something on ladder, and your opponent does something preventing that (like cheesing or early aggression), I think it would be helpful to re-think what it is to ladder for you. I think if you can 1) change your mindset of the ladder 2) understand that nothing is personal 3) the result of a game is close to meaningless your rage will decrease. I think you should write out for yourself what the ladder is, what you think it is, and how that's different than the former. Many people feel angry or cheated when they get cut off driving. They feel as if it's a personal attack on them, when in reality the person who cut them off probably just needed to get into that lane to exit, or was just moving into the passing lane, or something else entirely and they didn't realize it was something that would anger the person behind them. You might be feeling something similar. If that's the case, you need to somehow convince yourself (and maintain that mentaility while gaming) that the people you face on ladder aren't personally attacking you by cheesing or executing some other strategy, no matter what it is. Sure, some people might be trolling, but that's not personal either. I would also recommend watching people who aren't effected by losses. Try to get inside their heads. Try to emulate them. I suggest watching TLO, Snute (though i haven't seen him stream for awhile), or Grubby. Try to grasp why it is they don't seem bothered by it. The mindset is similar to more traditional sports. You don't see people rage when they have someone dribble past them (in soccer or basketball), or if they drop a pass, have a bad touch, miss a shot etc etc. The best always keep playing, they don't let mistakes weigh them down for the remainder of the game. If they did they wouldn't be where they are. Understand that it's just part of the game, and maybe instead of thinking about each game of SC separately, think about it as one continuous game. Losing a game is just making bad touch or having the ball stolen from you. Just get it back. You don't punch the wall, or blame the person who was guarding you, you simply try to get it back. How do you get the ball back in SC? Press play again and try and win 
Thank you to everyone for the well thought out and helpful responses.
The first paragraph of your statement really resonates, as it's very much like how I imagine road rage would be (though I don't really get road rage very badly). It's a good comparison, though.
Thinking about all the games as one continuous one is an interesting idea too. As a fan of most professional sports, it's an interesting approach to take.
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high expetations, the resulting lose, frustration, anger
don´t have high expetations you´re just a loser like all the others
in a good way
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What you need is an outlet for channeling your rage. Might I suggest joining a fight club or go to the shooting range.
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On May 09 2013 09:44 Kalingingsong wrote: if it's only limited to sc2, that would be very strange indeed. Are you sure you don't get it doing something else?
To this degree? Absolutely nothing else. Nothing at all, ever. Things annoy me from time to time, sure, and other games have caused some consternation, but absolutely nothing has caused this kind of reaction from me before.
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I think the best advice I ever got was this:
Stop putting your ego into it. You're not gaining or losing anything.
Stop taking you losing so personally. Stop worrying about it. Know that the reason you lost is because you could have played better, and that you can learn from it.
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On May 09 2013 09:53 riotjune wrote: What you need is an outlet for channeling your rage. Might I suggest joining a fight club or go to the shooting range.
I'd prefer exercising. I have no interest in fighting others and shooting ranges never did much as far as stress relief.
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