Gaming rage and anger management - please help - Page 20
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Flamingo777
United States1190 Posts
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padfoota
Taiwan1571 Posts
On May 12 2013 05:10 Flamingo777 wrote: You should seriously see a therapist, nothing you are describing is normal. Also, TeamLiquid might be a good place to see if anyone has had similar experiences, but don't rely on this site as a credible source for anger management advice. Seriously, the more I read his paragraph the more it seems like a really pent up guy who spends all his time controlling his posture in public and suddenly when playing this game in private he explodes.... Sounds familiar | ||
lawlohwhat
United States32 Posts
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Picklebread
808 Posts
Anyways, first step to fixing this is to find out what exactly is it about losing that makes you so mad. Like, not just "because I lost", like more like if its cause you don't feel like they should've won, or your mad at yourself (which is what it sounds like to me) or w.e. Gotta find out why its triggering you so bad. Remember that it is JUST a game, that is the mindset you should have going into it. Its for having fun, its an outlet ect and try to calm your emotions down, breathe slowly. Go outside, go for a walk, just chill the hell out the best way you can. Sounds like you have a good life, maybe taking a break would be good or quitting altogether honestly. It ain't worth stressin this hard over. Hope this helps. | ||
Lauriel
United States108 Posts
On May 12 2013 05:13 padfoota wrote: Seriously, the more I read his paragraph the more it seems like a really pent up guy who spends all his time controlling his posture in public and suddenly when playing this game in private he explodes.... Sounds familiar Several other people have mentioned this, but I'm afraid it just isn't true, at least with regards to the "pent up" part. | ||
Lauriel
United States108 Posts
On May 12 2013 04:22 Murdaa wrote: Look up intermittent explosive rage disorder.i know you said your fine outside of the game.but your life also sounds abnormaly laid back.have you been in stressful life situation in the past and found yourself over reacting to small irrelevant shit? I have found myself in stressful situations in life (who hasn't?) but I've always handled them fairly well (at least, in retrospect I think I have). I wouldn't say I react abnormally to small, irrelevant things any more than anyone else. | ||
Lauriel
United States108 Posts
On May 12 2013 04:33 furerkip wrote: LOL, this was actually kinda funny. Okay, so let me try to explain this to you. You're one of those guys who feed off their success. Like, you consider your success as a defining feature off you. If you want to really notice this, look at all your word choices: your life beyond the computer is fairly successful. "Wonderful" girl, good apartment, good everything in general ("I generally have a pretty awesome life."). You have a job you enjoy, blah blah blah. Now, one might say, "so what? He's living a good life, there's nothing with that." The follow up question I present however, is why did he even start talking about this? Like, if you have rage ABOUT A VIDEO GAME the most important thing to do is just calm down. That's the immediate advice anyone gives, no one actually asks about how you're living conditions are. However, you can't do this; it's probably because you feel like a loser after a game, and so it defies how you think about yourself (successful). Obviously, this would be a huge leap if he wasn't like this; but I really doubt it. Why? Because he spends nearly an hour raging, breaking things around him, etc. just after a few loses on sc2. So, I'd suggest two things (either/or): A) Quit playing so you stop feeling like a loser. The game balances your skill so you lose 50% of the time, if you don't like losing, you should stop playing. B) Stop caring about the results of a game. Just play the game for the fucks, the whole point of a game is to bring joy, not just for the winner, but for the loser as well. You're reading far, far too much into my word choices. The only reason I even mentioned my life outside of SC2 was to illustrate that my problems in SC2 were not merely the tip of a larger iceberg. As many here have pointed out, sometimes rage can be a symptom of a larger problem. However, in my case, I'm confident that is not the issue. | ||
Lauriel
United States108 Posts
On May 12 2013 05:42 Picklebread wrote: OP, I suffer with severe depression. I almost killed myself twice this year, and the symptoms you are describing are REALLY serious. Like, they are me when depression hits, maybe at a smaller scale but still. See a therapist please. Anyways, first step to fixing this is to find out what exactly is it about losing that makes you so mad. Like, not just "because I lost", like more like if its cause you don't feel like they should've won, or your mad at yourself (which is what it sounds like to me) or w.e. Gotta find out why its triggering you so bad. Remember that it is JUST a game, that is the mindset you should have going into it. Its for having fun, its an outlet ect and try to calm your emotions down, breathe slowly. Go outside, go for a walk, just chill the hell out the best way you can. Sounds like you have a good life, maybe taking a break would be good or quitting altogether honestly. It ain't worth stressin this hard over. Hope this helps. I'm sorry you're suffering from depression. I hope that you find a way to balance your life so that it doesn't affect you so severely. However, I'm pretty confident I'm not depressed, as the only negative feelings of this severity that I experience with any regularity stem from starcraft. As others have said, therapy would only be a last resort for me, as I like to try to solve my problems on my own if possible, and generally feel as though therapy can be somewhat disingenuous. I'd rather not get off on a tangent about that though. | ||
MoonfireSpam
United Kingdom1153 Posts
On May 12 2013 06:01 Lauriel wrote: I'm sorry you're suffering from depression. I hope that you find a way to balance your life so that it doesn't affect you so severely. However, I'm pretty confident I'm not depressed, as the only negative feelings of this severity that I experience with any regularity stem from starcraft. As others have said, therapy would only be a last resort for me, as I like to try to solve my problems on my own if possible, and generally feel as though therapy can be somewhat disingenuous. I'd rather not get off on a tangent about that though. Just out of interest, what happens when you lose in real life? Like when people give you shit for whatever reason which makes you have to work harder to make up for it, people U-turn on deals, getting cheated on etc. | ||
AnomalySC2
United States2073 Posts
On May 12 2013 06:01 Lauriel wrote: I'm sorry you're suffering from depression. I hope that you find a way to balance your life so that it doesn't affect you so severely. However, I'm pretty confident I'm not depressed, as the only negative feelings of this severity that I experience with any regularity stem from starcraft. As others have said, therapy would only be a last resort for me, as I like to try to solve my problems on my own if possible, and generally feel as though therapy can be somewhat disingenuous. I'd rather not get off on a tangent about that though. It does sound like you're suffering from depression, and you may not even draw that conclusion on your own until something horrible happens to you. At the very least you should recognize that the level of rage you're hitting is NOT healthy at all, and you either need to seek some professional help or give up on the game entirely if that is truly the only time you ever get that angry in life. | ||
Enki
United States2548 Posts
1. Slamming my fists into any objects around me with such force and consistency that I have damaged the nerves in my hands, wrists, and fingers several times, sometimes requiring months to heal. At one point I thought I was going to need surgery for a nerve impingement, but was fortunate to be able to avoid it. 2. Throwing, damaging, and breaking objects around me. Yesterday, I managed to slam 4 or 5 keys off of my $120.00 mechanical keyboard. Fortunately I was able to find them and re-attach them and it still works (good on you, Corsair!). 3. Screaming in fits of rage that lasts for anywhere from 30-45 minutes at their worst. I was actually cited for a noise violation by my apartment complex late last year for this and the associated slamming and banging. 4. Speeding and driving semi-recklessly when I have to go somewhere after playing and losing a few matches. This is the scariest thing, because I could, y'know, die, or cause someone else to die. Seriously just stop playing. Find another hobby. The first 3 are already pretty bad as you are destroying your own property and injuring yourself. Then you decide to drive when you are that angry and put lives in danger. Either see a shrink about your anger problems and get them under control or stop playing SC2 if it triggers your anger that badly. | ||
diehilde
Germany1596 Posts
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Lauriel
United States108 Posts
On May 12 2013 06:05 MoonfireSpam wrote: Just out of interest, what happens when you lose in real life? Like when people give you shit for whatever reason which makes you have to work harder to make up for it, people U-turn on deals, getting cheated on etc. If it's a failing of mine, like I didn't do my job well enough, then I become extremely focused on improving the situation and improving my performance. If it's someone doing something to me that I feel is shady or unfair (this actually just happened during the course of moving), I usually get frustrated at the situation, stay annoyed about it for a little while, and eventually just move on. If it's work related, I use it as motivation to perform well enough to prove them wrong. | ||
NET
United States703 Posts
On May 12 2013 06:14 diehilde wrote: Your self-complexity is probably far too low. Self-complexity means the amount of self-aspects and the interconnectivity between those that represent ones self. High self-complexity = many aspects, low interconnectivity and low self-complexity = few aspects, high interconnectivity. Studies found that negative feedback about performances evoked stronger emotional reactions in subjects that had low self-complexity than in subjects that had high self-complexity. Subjectively feeling one has done bad in one self-aspect has more weight the less self-aspects there are and more easily transfers to the whole self (in perception) the more interconnected the self-aspects are. This means you should probably try to get other hobbies that have nothing to do with competing, get more meaningful social contacts etc.. This behaviour would likely not occur if your self image would not have too few different aspects, with starcraft obviously being a much bigger part of it than would be appropriate or healthy. This is rather interesting. First time I heard of this concept, but it makes sense. Its great to learn something new and actually explains a lot when I look at myself and others. Nice post sir. | ||
KrazyTrumpet
United States2520 Posts
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Rad
United States935 Posts
Get a book on anger management, see if that helps, if not, it's time to suck it up and go to a psychologist. This is either a serious problem that needs a serious solution, or it's not truly a problem and this thread wasn't necessary. *edit* Keep in mind you might have issues that are affecting this aspect of your life without you realizing they're there. For example, just because your "job is in the performance business" doesn't mean you might not have some sort of performance anxiety causing this. That's what a professional can help you determine. If you just don't trust them for some reason, well, that itself could be due to some anxiety that you need to solve. | ||
Prevolved
United States573 Posts
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Thor.Rush
Sweden702 Posts
On May 12 2013 06:32 Prevolved wrote: When you lose and feel the rage coming, do push-ups. Do this every time. I agree, this helps! | ||
sc4k
United Kingdom5454 Posts
On May 12 2013 06:20 NET wrote: This is rather interesting. First time I heard of this concept, but it makes sense. Its great to learn something new and actually explains a lot when I look at myself and others. Nice post sir. I agree, this makes a lot of sense. I suffer from gaming rage, mostly when things in my life are going kind of badly. When I have a bunch of irons in the fire, and things are going well, I barely rage at all. | ||
salmonman78
United States13 Posts
Then I realized that I was getting nothing out of it, and that my son would eventually see me do this and pick up on it. That really shook me out of it, I always told him to be a good sport, that win or lose you can walk away with your head high and something learned that will make you better next time. He plays a lot of these games with me and if you look at my profile you will notice a lot of vs a.i. games which are him playing. Says he wants to rock at MLG or WCS one day(he's 11 lol). I don't want him to ever make an ass out of himself like I have. Just take a step back at times and try to find some humor in the situations or hell physically step back and go for a run or a walk and just zone out. | ||
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