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Introversion Awareness - Page 4

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Mortal
Profile Blog Joined November 2010
2943 Posts
December 21 2012 01:33 GMT
#61
I don't really know why this post was made, but I guess it'll help those that didn't know what it was before see it in a simple fashion. Although, I'm tired of these intro vs extrovert talks that the internet has been so excited about as of late. Just another craze in the world of psychology for people to try and analyze for reasons that someone is misunderstood by others (by no means and I saying "introverts" are bad in any way, I've always gotten INTJ on the shitty test, I'm just saying I think it's another waste of energy trying to categorize people).
The universe created an audience for itself.
Maxd11
Profile Joined July 2011
United States680 Posts
December 21 2012 01:35 GMT
#62
On December 21 2012 10:02 RoieTRS wrote:
The myths in the OP apply to 100% of people at varying levels and everyone will identify whether they are introverted or not. The OP paints a picture like introversion is a secret club. If this keeps up, in 5 years you'll be seeing people say "lol im so introverted" on a whim like they treat nerddom now.
I've been called shy or whatever bogus all my life and it has nothing to do with introversion vs extroversion. It is simply people give you shit about anything unless you tell them to back off. This is a scam I wouldn't be surprised if people started writing books on this soon or whatever else they do to get money

I totally agree. And they already are making books about it. Many kid's books have the main hero character as a loner who feels out of place.
I looked in the mirror and saw biupilm69t
puppykiller
Profile Blog Joined August 2009
United States3137 Posts
December 21 2012 01:38 GMT
#63
On December 21 2012 10:16 Thereisnosaurus wrote:
as a kind of alpha introvert (best expressed by the line 'yes I am quiet, what are you going to do about it punk?'), I think there's a sort of misconception in the OP that introversion is not aligned with boldness, confidence and charisma. I find I am at my most capable around other people when I let my quieter tendencies lead. I am extremely self confident, self critical (in a positive way) and self aware, so I am capable of making myself into an example of positive humanity. I serve, I prepare, I assist and I encourage, simply by going about my daily life.

I would say that the introvert's answer to extroverted charisma and social skill is what might be called 'force of will', the sort of thing you see in someone that tells you this person is both a) not to be fucked with and b) is worth not fucking with because they have their head screwed on straight. Introverts who aren't ashamed of what they feel and represent have incredible raw charisma in their sheer self confidence. I've always seen these people as role models and they've helped me shape myself into my current psychological state.

You can be an introvert and still a leader. You simply lead by example, not rhetoric.


Basically this. Too many symptoms of shyness and social weakness get associated with introversion. You can be a person who feels totally comfortable around people anywhere, be well received, and still be an introvert.
Why would I play sctoo when I can play BW?
LainRivers
Profile Joined March 2012
United States36 Posts
Last Edited: 2012-12-21 01:44:29
December 21 2012 01:38 GMT
#64
Everyone bashing this thread is completely misunderstanding it (Most likely due to the biased nature of the thread). Introversion is a gift...SO IS EXTROVERSION. Shut up, realize that this is an extrovert world and most people honestly believe introverts are anti-social and will end up being serial killers if not corrected. Jesus, it's not that hard to understand. Extroverts are just as capable as introverts and vice-versa. We just thrive in different environments.
FuzzyJAM
Profile Joined July 2010
Scotland9300 Posts
December 21 2012 01:40 GMT
#65
Introversion has nothing to do with your level of assertiveness, your confidence, your ability to speak publicly and privately, or anything like that. It has to do with motivations and where you feel most relaxed. It can be an advantage to be re-energised in a crowd or re-energised alone.

Shyness and introversion are different things. Introversion is not something that will negatively affect you the least, shyness is. This "introversion power!!" nonsense, however, is no better than the idea that introverts are failures with no social skills.
Did you ever say Yes to a single joy?
forgottendreams
Profile Joined August 2010
United States1771 Posts
Last Edited: 2012-12-21 01:43:55
December 21 2012 01:40 GMT
#66
I was a little skeptical until I scored "INFJ" from 2/3 tests (the third one being "INTP") and the INFJ assessment was extremely accurate and fits the title Jung gave it, "The Counselor", which in turn fits my career ambitions of being an advisor or legal counsel. My friends call me the old man sage or the prophet so I guess it lastly fits my own friends stereotyping of me

P.S. Thanks for that post Barrin, I thought it gives us introverts some needed self confidence to be ok with being introverted.
Flip9
Profile Joined June 2012
Germany151 Posts
December 21 2012 01:41 GMT
#67
On December 21 2012 10:11 Barrin wrote:
Show nested quote +
On December 21 2012 09:58 Mstring wrote:
On December 21 2012 09:53 Brosy wrote:
On December 21 2012 09:49 Mstring wrote:
If you think "I'm an introvert", so you will remain. Drop the labels and you're free.


Nonsense. Being an introvert or extrovert has nothing to do with how you think. For instance if I go to an event that where I am talking with a bunch of people that I don't know, to just stop thinking that I'm an introvert will not make me more comfortable with the situation.


Self-dialog is everything. If you think you know a certain thing, you won't look for evidence to the contrary.

That has more to do with Judging vs. Perceiving. It's the J's that are susceptible to this... not I's.

Show nested quote +
On December 21 2012 09:55 Barrin wrote:
On December 21 2012 09:49 Mstring wrote:
If you think "I'm an introvert", so you will remain. Drop the labels and you're free.

Honestly, fuck you for implying introversion is a bad thing.

I did no such thing. I'm implying that these labels and identities lead to rigid thinking and less freedom.

"If you think "I'm an introvert", so you will remain."
This right here is implying that being an introvert is undesirable. The only reason to say something like this is like a warning. To a reasonable person it's hard to see this line any other way.

"Drop the labels and you're free."
This does a better job of conveying what you actually mean, but even still it almost seems to imply that being an introvert takes away your freedom (you really mean just believing it does).

I would really like to see some more evidence for your claims. So you know the people who invented the personality types testified over and over that their patients were feeling better about themselves and that sorta thing (and there are many many first hand accounts... including my own...). WTB [your examples].


Your OP has a lot of information and I'm sure it will help some people get a better understanding, so good job on that.
However you arguing takes away a lot of your credibility. Where is the silence that you preach?
Actually I found what Mstring wrote a good addition to the other posts and not offensive at all (and I'm what you would call introvertive).
rasnj
Profile Joined May 2010
United States1959 Posts
Last Edited: 2012-12-21 01:44:16
December 21 2012 01:42 GMT
#68
On December 21 2012 10:31 Mstring wrote:
Show nested quote +
On December 21 2012 10:17 rasnj wrote:
On December 21 2012 10:05 Mstring wrote:
On December 21 2012 09:55 Barrin wrote:
On December 21 2012 09:49 Mstring wrote:
If you think "I'm an introvert", so you will remain. Drop the labels and you're free.

Honestly, fuck you for implying introversion is a bad thing. You'll be free when you can accept who you are - you kinda sound like someone who hasn't.


Is this a subtle put-down attempt? Why would you say this?

Why would we want to be free of the labels? The whole introvert vs extrovert dichotomy is just a recognition that most people fairly neatly divides into one class or the other, and further it is the idea that perhaps the groups need to be taught about each other and how to interact because there is a lack of understanding between the groups. You can compare it to the realization that there are boys and girls (or straight and gay people if you want something less physical), and it helps children to get some idea how to interact with the other group.

As the OP explains many people have experienced that introvert tendencies as you grow up are treated with an attempt to "cure" them and make you more extrovert. Your post makes it sound like you have the same approach. It is similar to someone coming out of the closet as gay and they are told "don't worry it's just a phase" or "you just haven't met the man/woman (of opposite gender)".

You may of course just have meant that there is no need for the distinction, but many people find it helpful because a large group of people are very hard to understand without a little guidance. Furthermore people need different advice depending on their personality. How do you socialize, how do you lead, how do you make friends? The answers may depend on how you are most comfortable engaging other people.

EDIT: Obviously no one is suggesting this is a completely binary relationship. You are of course some mixture of both introverted and extroverted. It is also clear that different situations call for different skills so you need to act introverted or extroverted on occassion to be succssfull. You shouldn't treat this as a terminal diagnosis or anything like that, just as a way to further understand yourself and other people. This includes understanding how others are successfull at some things you consider almost impossible and where you can push your boundaries.

I'm not trying to cure anyone from anything except using labels which can only serve to divide. What you "are" is subject to change at any second. Why would I want to limit my growth of self by attaching all these rigid identities to "I"?

How you lead, socialise and make friends is all personal preference in the end. What value does these two identities have in this regard?

But they don't just serve to divide. It makes it possible to have a discussion about introversion vs extroversion, and in particular a defense of several traits of introverted people which have generally been seen as negative by many people. It also makes it possible to recognize and learn something about yourself. It is clear to many people that they are introverted or extroverted before being introduced to the idea in a way like this thread does. If you suppress the debate you get people (especially children) questioning themselves and asking "Is something wrong with me for not wanting to socialize? Will I ever be successful? Does anyone else feel like I do? Is there a way to deal with it?" The recognition of the idea of introversion helps people deal with this kind of stuff.

It is all a matter of trying to understand yourself and understand others. You can then accept yourself as you are and recognize where your boundaries are. If you recognize that you are an introvert and have trouble socializing at parties then you can look up some of the litterature like the ones given in the OP which may very well help you. If you didn't know about introversion or didn't bother to label it, then it would much harder to understand how others in a similar situation successfully dealt with the problem you are having.

I think maybe I got a little too defensive in responding to you and am sorry for that, but I still feel the dichotomy is a useful one for many people.

EDIT: Also you may not find it useful, but I can personally attest to the fact that I found the distinction and some writings about it useful in understanding myself and trying to develop my personality.
Birdie
Profile Blog Joined August 2007
New Zealand4438 Posts
December 21 2012 01:43 GMT
#69
I feel like pretty much all the quotes there have to do with keeping your tongue. An introvert by definition is not someone who necessarily knows how to keep their tongue, and plenty of extroverts can be very skilled at keeping their tongues too.
Red classic | A butterfly dreamed he was Zhuangzi | 4.5k, heading to 5k as support!
Cutlery
Profile Joined December 2010
Norway565 Posts
Last Edited: 2012-12-21 01:52:28
December 21 2012 01:44 GMT
#70
I feel like there is or must be balance. For too long I was extremely introverted. I was intuitive and thinking, a lot. Now it's important to me to simply have fun. No, not a lot. But specially in social situations, having fun and be "extroverted" is much more important to me. Feeling is more important than thinking, and sensing often more important than intuition.

It's not something I have learned to "maintain". I shut it on and off, because it's not too natural to turn it "on" when I'm alone. Or when I'm tired. Or when I'm under stress/pressure. But I must admit, I like myself much better after I learned to talk nonsense and laugh it up even in a group of people. It doesn't have to mean anything. And oftentimes even (seemingly) extroverts will surprise you and share parts of their world. To some it comes natural, but I had to learn it, and just like I've been introverted for so long, I love to shut off my brain and simply feel, perceive and perhaps even judge to save myself a lot of "trouble" having to analyze and think. For why consider someone elses feelings if you can't shout out about your own?

My nature+upbringing made me extremely introverted. But I don't/didn't like it. There must be balance. Intuition means NOTHING if you can't begin to sense your surroundings, perceiving matters little if you cannot make judgements, thinking matters little if you do not feel emotions in "this very instant" (meaning that I would often/always be "numb" around people, and repeat the experiences/emotions when I was "home and safe", instead of paying attention to them and acting upon them when I should. For I have found it's much better to show it and act it like you're actually There and Important, rather than bring shit home and work them out in solitude, cause the possible motives of others are endless, and you won't get to learn neither anyone else nor yourself this way), and being introverted is awful if you can't also exert yourself. The "inside" world needs to be balanced by the "outside" world. Not saying it should be 50/50, but since I'm introverted, I have worked a lot on my emotions to finally acknowledge that I too enjoy interacting in the "outside" world, showing everyone my warts and all. And I like myself much better because of it.

EDIT: Guess I'm INTP. Thinking, intuitive, and introverted; I never judge and am highly perceptive. Although all these apply to the way I was, or mostly am, they do not necessarily always describe me equally well today. There has to be some sort of "bar" or "slides", balance, which can even change as you "grow".
dreamsmasher
Profile Joined November 2010
816 Posts
December 21 2012 01:44 GMT
#71
hmm i got


ENTP
Extravert(22%) iNtuitive(75%) iNtuitive Thinking(75%) Perceiving(11)%

You have slight preference of Extraversion over Introversion (22%)
You have distinctive preference of Intuition over Sensing (75%)
You have distinctive preference of Thinking over Feeling (75%)
You have slight preference of Perceiving over Judging (11%)

i would say this is pretty accurate, especially the descriptions of what this 'type' likes.

I'm in a pretty 'nerdy' major if you will: economics/statistics, but I have a lot of friends that don't share any of my similar intellectual pursuits, who like to party, hit clubs/do risky random things, and I can chat up anyone and make small talk easily. i also have my share of friends who practically never go out, really enjoy intellectual things, are generally 'quiet' or whatever society calls that -- i generally don't have trouble making friends from either end of the spectrum, you can be smart and be either an extrovert or introvert after all.
forgottendreams
Profile Joined August 2010
United States1771 Posts
December 21 2012 01:46 GMT
#72
On December 21 2012 10:44 dreamsmasher wrote:
hmm i got


ENTP
Extravert(22%) iNtuitive(75%) iNtuitive Thinking(75%) Perceiving(11)%

You have slight preference of Extraversion over Introversion (22%)
You have distinctive preference of Intuition over Sensing (75%)
You have distinctive preference of Thinking over Feeling (75%)
You have slight preference of Perceiving over Judging (11%)

i would say this is pretty accurate, especially the descriptions of what this 'type' likes.

I'm in a pretty 'nerdy' major if you will: economics/statistics, but I have a lot of friends that don't share any of my similar intellectual pursuits, who like to party, hit clubs/do risky random things, and I can chat up anyone and make small talk easily. i also have my share of friends who practically never go out, really enjoy intellectual things, are generally 'quiet' or whatever society calls that -- i generally don't have trouble making friends from either end of the spectrum, you can be smart and be either an extrovert or introvert after all.


Extroverted nerds are in vogue right now bro, and for the foreseeable future. If you are one be proud!
MountainDewJunkie
Profile Blog Joined June 2009
United States10346 Posts
Last Edited: 2012-12-21 01:49:14
December 21 2012 01:48 GMT
#73
Personality tests
self-help/self-analysis books
arbitrary cultural labels
vagueness
pretty people on camera
Massive stroke-fest
ambiguous quotes

Some of the worst aspects of our culture and exploitative marketing are all crammed into this OP.
[21:07] <Shock710> whats wrong with her face [20:50] <dAPhREAk> i beat it the day after it came out | <BLinD-RawR> esports is a giant vagina
LainRivers
Profile Joined March 2012
United States36 Posts
December 21 2012 01:50 GMT
#74
I don't think some people realize you can change your personality, it's just really fucking hard to do it 'because you want to'. You would literally be going against what your body feels is 'right' due to genetics or your environment growing up. It definitely happens over your lifetime, and in some cases even radically changes in a very short amount of time. You are not some static thing that can never change or adapt. Also, one introvert can be completely different from the next aside from the fundamental similarities basically every introvert shares. Which is why there is even a word to separate introversion and extroversion.
Grumbels
Profile Blog Joined May 2009
Netherlands7032 Posts
Last Edited: 2012-12-21 01:51:55
December 21 2012 01:50 GMT
#75
Barrin strikes me as the kind of person who has a beard and ponders about the relative value of Buddhism.
Well, now I tell you, I never seen good come o' goodness yet. Him as strikes first is my fancy; dead men don't bite; them's my views--amen, so be it.
TricksAre4Figs
Profile Joined May 2010
United States125 Posts
Last Edited: 2012-12-21 01:53:00
December 21 2012 01:50 GMT
#76
"American society tends to emphasize that success comes through being highly social and outgoing (in short, extroverted) which negatively pressures introverted people (1/4 to 1/2 of the population) into being uncomfortable with themselves or their environments, which in turn stifles creativity and progress."

OP can you elaborate on the definition of "American society" and "success" as it pertains to this statement? Otherwise this statement has hardly any meaning.
Liquid crystal display everyday.
CajunMan
Profile Joined July 2010
United States823 Posts
Last Edited: 2012-12-21 01:56:38
December 21 2012 01:52 GMT
#77
http://www.humanmetrics.com/hr/JTypesResult.aspx

Took this one says I am 78% introvert I've taken them before and it has been a mostly like that. I am one of those people that are pretty introvert for the most part but once I get used to people or warmed up at a social event I like explode to a different person sometime haha. I can be very outgoing but when it is done for me it is fucking done and I need a nap and people to leave me the hell alone haha.


On December 21 2012 10:50 TricksAre4Figs wrote:
"American society tends to emphasize that success comes through being highly social and outgoing (in short, extroverted) which negatively pressures introverted people (1/4 to 1/2 of the population) into being uncomfortable with themselves or their environments, which in turn stifles creativity and progress."

OP can you elaborate on the definition of "American society" and "success" as it pertains to this statement?


Well if you look at any work manual or what to do in an interview or what people look for it is all about being "extroverted". Being very out there kinda loud and exciting always especially in retail even if your job requires little socialization like working the stock rooms as I have before they always look for that.

On December 21 2012 10:50 LainRivers wrote:
I don't think some people realize you can change your personality, it's just really fucking hard to do it 'because you want to'. You would literally be going against what your body feels is 'right' due to genetics or your environment growing up. It definitely happens over your lifetime, and in some cases even radically changes in a very short amount of time. You are not some static thing that can never change or adapt. Also, one introvert can be completely different from the next aside from the fundamental similarities basically every introvert shares. Which is why there is even a word to separate introversion and extroversion.



Ya when you do it its like breaking for most of us at least 18+ years of habits haha. But it isn't impossible I defiantly had to change in High School I forced it and it becomes part of you.
Mstring
Profile Joined September 2011
Australia510 Posts
December 21 2012 01:54 GMT
#78
On December 21 2012 10:42 rasnj wrote:
Show nested quote +
On December 21 2012 10:31 Mstring wrote:
On December 21 2012 10:17 rasnj wrote:
On December 21 2012 10:05 Mstring wrote:
On December 21 2012 09:55 Barrin wrote:
On December 21 2012 09:49 Mstring wrote:
If you think "I'm an introvert", so you will remain. Drop the labels and you're free.

Honestly, fuck you for implying introversion is a bad thing. You'll be free when you can accept who you are - you kinda sound like someone who hasn't.


Is this a subtle put-down attempt? Why would you say this?

Why would we want to be free of the labels? The whole introvert vs extrovert dichotomy is just a recognition that most people fairly neatly divides into one class or the other, and further it is the idea that perhaps the groups need to be taught about each other and how to interact because there is a lack of understanding between the groups. You can compare it to the realization that there are boys and girls (or straight and gay people if you want something less physical), and it helps children to get some idea how to interact with the other group.

As the OP explains many people have experienced that introvert tendencies as you grow up are treated with an attempt to "cure" them and make you more extrovert. Your post makes it sound like you have the same approach. It is similar to someone coming out of the closet as gay and they are told "don't worry it's just a phase" or "you just haven't met the man/woman (of opposite gender)".

You may of course just have meant that there is no need for the distinction, but many people find it helpful because a large group of people are very hard to understand without a little guidance. Furthermore people need different advice depending on their personality. How do you socialize, how do you lead, how do you make friends? The answers may depend on how you are most comfortable engaging other people.

EDIT: Obviously no one is suggesting this is a completely binary relationship. You are of course some mixture of both introverted and extroverted. It is also clear that different situations call for different skills so you need to act introverted or extroverted on occassion to be succssfull. You shouldn't treat this as a terminal diagnosis or anything like that, just as a way to further understand yourself and other people. This includes understanding how others are successfull at some things you consider almost impossible and where you can push your boundaries.

I'm not trying to cure anyone from anything except using labels which can only serve to divide. What you "are" is subject to change at any second. Why would I want to limit my growth of self by attaching all these rigid identities to "I"?

How you lead, socialise and make friends is all personal preference in the end. What value does these two identities have in this regard?

It also makes it possible to recognize and learn something about yourself. It is clear to many people that they are introverted or extroverted before being introduced to the idea in a way like this thread does. If you suppress the debate you get people (especially children) questioning themselves and asking "Is something wrong with me for not wanting to socialize? Will I ever be successful? Does anyone else feel like I do? Is there a way to deal with it?" The recognition of the idea of introversion helps people deal with this kind of stuff.

What advantage does saying to a child "It's OK because you're introverted" have over simply "It's OK!"?


It is all a matter of trying to understand yourself and understand others. You can then accept yourself as you are and recognize where your boundaries are.

Boundaries are self-created. How does limiting yourself to boundaries of accepted identities help you?


If you recognize that you are an introvert and have trouble socializing at parties then you can look up some of the litterature like the ones given in the OP which may very well help you. If you didn't know about introversion or didn't bother to label it, then it would much harder to understand how others in a similar situation successfully dealt with the problem you are having.

You're absolutely right, it can be useful the way things are. I just think things could be better XD


I think maybe I got a little too defensive in responding to you and am sorry for that, but I still feel the dichotomy is a useful one for many people.

You're probably right. Thanks for the dialog.
Randomaccount#77123
Profile Blog Joined May 2010
United States5003 Posts
December 21 2012 01:56 GMT
#79
--- Nuked ---
Chronos.
Profile Joined February 2012
United States805 Posts
December 21 2012 02:01 GMT
#80
Many of the things in these lists for introverts describe me perfectly. Especially these 3: hating small talk, only talking when I have something to say, and preferring to talk with writing instead of words (texts instead of phone, not using mics online etc.)

So I'm definitely an introvert, but I definitely already knew that as well. And although I generally don't talk unless there's a specific reason, when I get to know people really well that can change.
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