Wow. That is just bloody unbelievable.
(*peaks into his hentai folder*)
Forum Index > General Forum |
Xayoz
Estonia373 Posts
Wow. That is just bloody unbelievable. (*peaks into his hentai folder*) | ||
Iyerbeth
England2410 Posts
On November 09 2011 01:45 rederoin wrote: Show nested quote + On November 09 2011 01:41 Iyerbeth wrote: On November 09 2011 01:39 RoosterSamurai wrote: On November 09 2011 01:34 saltywet wrote: On November 06 2011 10:15 aeoliant wrote: he definitely has harmed children by paying some sick fucker for the pictures... he deserves to be put away. but no parole seems a little harsh (he has ~50+ years in jail...) maybe he has a shit lawyer you could get the same sentence for watching children hentai. do you harm actually harm any child then? No you can't. You shouldn't, but since each image can be convicted as a seperate charge, 100 images at 1 year per image, it technically could happen. It wouldn't, but it could. Edit: Though I'm unsure if cartoons are illegal in the US if we were referring specifically to the US. Its illegal in the US and several European countries. Ah right, I know it was in a lot of countries but after I posted I had a little doubt in my mind that I may have been wrong about it being the same in the US. Thank ye. | ||
rederoin
Netherlands51 Posts
On November 09 2011 01:45 SySLeif wrote: Well he did steal that life of the child. For now on the child will have nightmares about it and will never grow up to be the same person had it not happened. It's very fair. He didn't do anything like that. I think you misread the article. | ||
Twiggs
United States600 Posts
I don't even want to comment on this situation really. Child Porn is fuckkkkkkeeeddd up... But I've seen murderers get off for less. I'd rather see some of this guy's prison years taken away and slapped onto a cold blooded murderer. Also I don't even want to touch on the fact that this case borders the situation of punishing someone for their thoughts (all he actually did was download.. the real crime was in his head). So is the government is punishing us for our thoughts now? Oh big brother is watching... Minority Report anyone? O.o the future is that scary. Regardless our justice system is messed. I wish we had perfect justice. Where's our Dark Knight? We need him... | ||
Krohm
Canada1857 Posts
On November 09 2011 01:21 NanaCry wrote: When i was 11, i used to be on IRC chatting with people i considered to be my friends. One of them was really nice to me so i used to speak with him a lot about my life and the little problems i had with my parents at this time. One day he asked me to come to his house for a week end so we could speak and see eachother in real life. I remember him saying that my sex and age wasn't a matter to him. I answered him that i did not have enough money for that. To which he responded that he would pay me the ticket and my parents would never know about this. I really wanted to see him, he was the only person i though that could really understand me. He always gave me good advices and was always here to hear me. I didn't come to his house, not because of him, but because my parents would have known and i thought they would have been mad at me because i though they didn't like me. Few years later, this same man showed me pictures of a man with two little girl (approx 3) completely naked. He was holding the first girl by her feet so that the little girl could suck his dick. The other girl was only watching the camera on the bed. This picture shocked me. Since then, nothing really shocked me. I've seen many horrible things including picture of dead bodies, video of assassinations, extreme body modifications, torture, .. Nothing seems to affect me anymore. A year after that, i heard that this guy got caught for possession of child porn on his hard drive. He was sentenced to jail and psycatric sessions. He flew to Guinea for some times and went back again. He never actually went to jail nor did he recieved any psycatric help. I'm still speaking to him. Two years ago he went to my house where i saw him in real life for the first time while he was still being purchased by the police. We never spoke about the day he asked me to come to his house, we just watched movies drink beers and talked. Soon after that, i started to search for child pornography pictures on the internet and found some. I never intended to like that. I wanted to see the picture he showed me to see if i was able to feel something again. I wanted to be shocked, i wanted to feel bad watching this. I didn't feel anything. So i searched again and again, i thought it was the only last thing that could makes me feel bad but actually, i started to enjoy it. When i realised i was looking up for cp for excitment rather than remorse, that's when i started to feel guilt. I realised i was becoming like him and that scared the shit out of me. I felt horrible thinking i was hurting someone by looking at these picture. At that time i had two options : see a shrink or kill myself. I decided to see a shrink first and if it failed then suicide. I was able to see someone specialized in deviant sexual behaviour and she first put me on antidepressant. It didn't really help (talking to her did afterwards) so she asked me to be followed by an hospital on regular basis for a month or two. I panicked, i didn't know what to do. It was the first time i talked to my parents about all this. They felt bad for not knowning this all this time but said that i didn't need hospitalization. That it was too hard for a treatment and that i could overcome my urges without it. I did, and i'm so happy about that. I never thought i would. What i want to say is all the pedophiles aren't the same. The guy i met is a good person. He's smart, educated and really nice to everybody. He doesn't deserve to be locked in jail for life and he doesn't deserve death penalty. He is just sick. He needs help, not punishment. And i'm the one he nearly abused when i was a child who says that. I saw his side and i don't think jail would have helped me like my shrink did. Of course there are pedophiles who won't ever change but they're only a little part of them. For the others, help can't hurt, punishment do. I saw a videos of a pedophile being hit to death by dozens of angry men. All i thought was "If it was me ? Did i deserve that ?". My answer is no and whatever this guy did, i think those men who killed him because of his sickness are the one who should be punished. English isn't my native language, i'm sorry for my mistakes. I hope i was clear, i'm getting a bit emotional when it comes to this subject. Wow that is a really strong post. Thank you for sharing that with us. You're right too, I don't mean to sound like I'm defending pedophiles but people tend to forget that everyone has a story and there's an actual person involved. Sure there may be some really terrible people out there that will never stop and seriously harm children. Those people I have no mercy for. But I do show leniency towards the people who appear to just need help take you in this story for example; you recognized your problem and sought help. That's very respectable. I too have had my own problems with something similar to things like this. Not CP directly but somewhat related. As for the OP it's really sad that he's been sentenced that amount of time. I don't think the time will stick though. This will most definitely end up in the supreme courts and overturned. Given the fact he just possessed pictures he found online. (The method in which he got them are somewhat unknown though. I don't know if he paid someone for them or what?) It's not like he went out and actually raped children. You could argue that he helped harm the children in an indirect way but I think that depends on the method in which he obtained the photos. If they were already out there and he just collected them from various file sharing sources then I'd say that's hardly worth his punishment. Also if you factor in his age he just most likely needs some serious psychological help. Which he will not get in the American judicial system. | ||
Golem72
Canada127 Posts
On November 09 2011 02:16 Krohm wrote: + Show Spoiler + On November 09 2011 01:21 NanaCry wrote: When i was 11, i used to be on IRC chatting with people i considered to be my friends. One of them was really nice to me so i used to speak with him a lot about my life and the little problems i had with my parents at this time. One day he asked me to come to his house for a week end so we could speak and see eachother in real life. I remember him saying that my sex and age wasn't a matter to him. I answered him that i did not have enough money for that. To which he responded that he would pay me the ticket and my parents would never know about this. I really wanted to see him, he was the only person i though that could really understand me. He always gave me good advices and was always here to hear me. I didn't come to his house, not because of him, but because my parents would have known and i thought they would have been mad at me because i though they didn't like me. Few years later, this same man showed me pictures of a man with two little girl (approx 3) completely naked. He was holding the first girl by her feet so that the little girl could suck his dick. The other girl was only watching the camera on the bed. This picture shocked me. Since then, nothing really shocked me. I've seen many horrible things including picture of dead bodies, video of assassinations, extreme body modifications, torture, .. Nothing seems to affect me anymore. A year after that, i heard that this guy got caught for possession of child porn on his hard drive. He was sentenced to jail and psycatric sessions. He flew to Guinea for some times and went back again. He never actually went to jail nor did he recieved any psycatric help. I'm still speaking to him. Two years ago he went to my house where i saw him in real life for the first time while he was still being purchased by the police. We never spoke about the day he asked me to come to his house, we just watched movies drink beers and talked. Soon after that, i started to search for child pornography pictures on the internet and found some. I never intended to like that. I wanted to see the picture he showed me to see if i was able to feel something again. I wanted to be shocked, i wanted to feel bad watching this. I didn't feel anything. So i searched again and again, i thought it was the only last thing that could makes me feel bad but actually, i started to enjoy it. When i realised i was looking up for cp for excitment rather than remorse, that's when i started to feel guilt. I realised i was becoming like him and that scared the shit out of me. I felt horrible thinking i was hurting someone by looking at these picture. At that time i had two options : see a shrink or kill myself. I decided to see a shrink first and if it failed then suicide. I was able to see someone specialized in deviant sexual behaviour and she first put me on antidepressant. It didn't really help (talking to her did afterwards) so she asked me to be followed by an hospital on regular basis for a month or two. I panicked, i didn't know what to do. It was the first time i talked to my parents about all this. They felt bad for not knowning this all this time but said that i didn't need hospitalization. That it was too hard for a treatment and that i could overcome my urges without it. I did, and i'm so happy about that. I never thought i would. What i want to say is all the pedophiles aren't the same. The guy i met is a good person. He's smart, educated and really nice to everybody. He doesn't deserve to be locked in jail for life and he doesn't deserve death penalty. He is just sick. He needs help, not punishment. And i'm the one he nearly abused when i was a child who says that. I saw his side and i don't think jail would have helped me like my shrink did. Of course there are pedophiles who won't ever change but they're only a little part of them. For the others, help can't hurt, punishment do. I saw a videos of a pedophile being hit to death by dozens of angry men. All i thought was "If it was me ? Did i deserve that ?". My answer is no and whatever this guy did, i think those men who killed him because of his sickness are the one who should be punished. English isn't my native language, i'm sorry for my mistakes. I hope i was clear, i'm getting a bit emotional when it comes to this subject. Wow that is a really strong post. Thank you for sharing that with us. You're right too, I don't mean to sound like I'm defending pedophiles but people tend to forget that everyone has a story and there's an actual person involved. Sure there may be some really terrible people out there that will never stop and seriously harm children. Those people I have no mercy for. But I do show leniency towards the people who appear to just need help take you in this story for example; you recognized your problem and sought help. That's very respectable. I too have had my own problems with something similar to things like this. Not CP directly but somewhat related. As for the OP it's really sad that he's been sentenced that amount of time. I don't think the time will stick though. This will most definitely end up in the supreme courts and overturned. Given the fact he just possessed pictures he found online. (The method in which he got them are somewhat unknown though. I don't know if he paid someone for them or what?) It's not like he went out and actually raped children. You could argue that he helped harm the children in an indirect way but I think that depends on the method in which he obtained the photos. If they were already out there and he just collected them from various file sharing sources then I'd say that's hardly worth his punishment. Also if you factor in his age he just most likely needs some serious psychological help. Which he will not get in the American judicial system. I love you people you actually think! Thank you for sharing that story and you are right I love people like you that actually share your experiences because it is in only that way might we be able to overcome things as to saying a person is sick and there is no help for them. People who say that are sick themselves sadly we only get a shrink after we have committed the crime! I was recently diagnosed with schizophrenia but a long story short you wouldn't believe how many times in my life I was brought to the edge from losing control. The talking has helped with not only the shrink but other friends and understanding things has become more clear. Though I don't believe that people understand the gravity of their actions because like the guy with the CP experience in how he felt nothing I too have experienced a life like this and at times unable to feel complete emotions or satisfaction of any form. The only example I can give you is that yesterday I was sitting at home doing nothing and a friend invited me to MW3 launch party somehow the guy who won the grand prize was not there and they drew again... I won but after everyone was celebrating I knew what was happening to me in reality where I was manufacturing false emotions I really had no interest somewhat. Regardless I am making some changes and trying for the best because I know I have a problem and am facing just like that guy did. The best thing to do though for people who don't know though is step outside of yourself and look at your self analyze and examine. When you find or see a problem acknowledge it and deal with it because ignoring problems only makes it worse! | ||
Brosaurus
United States12 Posts
Yet, our community will exonerate pot smokers who monetarily support the cartels that have been murdering people for decades in Latin America. Just some food for thought. | ||
r00ty
Germany1037 Posts
First of all why is it so goddamn hard to talk about it at all? While writing this i was mostly thinking to just delete it and forget about it. This site is normally not the place to talk about it, but many arguments in this thread made me feel sick. I see pedos/near-pedos telling their story but none of the victims, so here it is. It's not well written i'm not a native english speaker and there's so much more to tell. It's just so complicated... And this is just my story. Every person is different. It got longer than i wanted, some stuff might seem confusing but i tried. I hope it's readable and understandable. I'll spoiler it. + Show Spoiler + I have caring great parents, was good student and overall a really bright kid. Working class household but the kids were always first as it's supposed to be. I was just crying a lot and still do and emotions and feelings are kind of a book with seven seals to me, just too powerful most of the time in both ways (hate/love). Also people touching me in any way was always a no-go until i absolutely trust them. Also heavy claustrophobia and some other stuff not nice to have. When growing up, problems were starting to get serious. I was just not able to understand myself. Why those strong feelings all the time? Why this strange behavior? At the time i finished school (abitur/a-levels without ever learning, bright kid heh?), i started taking drugs. Weed only for the first years but others were to come. Finally i had something to soothe myself but as you can imagine it wasn't quite healthy on the long run. My behavior made it hard to find friends many people saw me as a weirdo, i guess and i can't blame 'em. Worst were the questions like "your quite attractive and so nice, why you don't have a girlfriend", ("you're so smart, why don't you make more of your life" became my favorite in the last years) and all that stuff. Good questions i also asked myself thousands of times. Why? I did not have answer so something must be really wrong with me. But what? Then there was this evening. One of the evenings i normally really cherish. I was 23 at that time just started university (which i quit after a couple of months). Two of my best friends (of the 5 or so overall left...) and me just getting drunk, playing cards, having fun, me feeling normal. We started to wrestle at some point just for the lulz which ended in my best friend, who is a lot stronger than me, pinning me to the ground without me being able to move. That's when i was "triggered" (as i know now). I started hyperventilating, crying, every muscle in my body cramped and my brain just went nuts. He was going nuts as well, like "i'm so sorry, what did i do, i'm so sorry, what did i do? please calm down!". Second worst night of my life. That's when i realised there's something terribly wrong. But I was still not able to get it together, thinking for days about that and my whole life so far. I decided to kill myself in the end, because nothing made sense anymore. No "crying for help" shit just end it. I am a man of principles though and when i was ready to jump the train, the thought came up, that i cannot do this to my parents and my family. Better a failing son, than one who killed himself. (to all the smartasses who go like "if you really want to kill yourself you'd be dead"). So i kept on going for years without any destination just for the sake of staying alive. Changing my shitty jobs every year or so when people started coming too close asking those damn questions again. Then there was this worst day of my life: Four years ago my brother beat my sister over something trivial. Violence never occured in my family and i was not willing to let him get away with this (family/best friends > all). When i told my mother i am going to beat the crap out of him, she told me i don't understand! After i insisted she has to declare to me why, or i am still going to beat him she told the story (crying): Family Holiday, he was 9 i was 5, a guy looked after us when my parents wanted an evening for themselves, you can put the rest together for yourself... Explained a lot. After first hearing the story i wasn't even thinking about myself and she wasn't speaking about me. I have absolutely no memory of it and already stopped caring about myself in general. I was just thinking about that *guy* (words can not describe the hate) destroying the life of my brother. But it didn't take long until it clicked. I had to swear never to talk to my brother and father about this. I agreed with this because he's finally able to lead a normal life atm and i don't want to pull him back in there. Concerning my father, he definately would have killed the guy if he knew, so he doesn't. Should he know? I decided he shouldn't because he's a great dad (He's over 70, no need to put that onto him). I can just be sure my brother was raped and i was there as well. What did he do to me? Should i be glad i have no memory of it? Would it help me to deal with it if i knew? Unfortunately i was always able to hide my problems from my parents quite well. Maybe they never made the connection and i don't blame 'em. Or do they know and the guilt is just too much? The human mind does crazy things sometimes. Never talked to them about it, even after i knew the story. Always tried my best to fake that everything is OK. I am so damaged, even after knowing all this stuff it's impossible for me to deal with it and my strange behavior stays the same. Also i just cannot talk about it to anyone and still fake being ok as far as possible. This is basically the first time... I am 31 now. Well my body is, my mind clearly isn't. My second try finding a therapist starts soon. I really would like to be happy again, because killing myself is not an option for me. My case is kind of soft and it was enough to severely damage my whole psyche. What about children being molested over years or even by their own family? I don't want to imagine. That's also one of the things that keeps me going. "There's worse. If they can make it, you have to!" So why am i telling this? I don't know for sure. It helps that's one thing. The other is, i want pedos to know what they are doing to children. Too many people are way too tolerant in this thread. Yes perhaps many of the victims are able to lead a normal life, but if you risk to destroy someone just to fullfil your sexual needs, you deserve the worst! If you feel those needs, seek help! If you can't help it and cross the line or support CP in any way, you deserve to die in pain. I get a bad conscience from killing a fly, but if you are pedo who actually molested a child, i could kill you with my bare hands without feeling any remorse. | ||
dmgdnooc
Australia33 Posts
Sure hope it was a good one. | ||
Millitron
United States2611 Posts
On November 09 2011 09:37 r00ty wrote: OK, f**k it. So here's an example from the other side. First of all why is it so goddamn hard to talk about it at all? While writing this i was mostly thinking to just delete it and forget about it. This site is normally not the place to talk about it, but many arguments in this thread made me feel sick. I see pedos/near-pedos telling their story but none of the victims, so here it is. It's not well written i'm not a native english speaker and there's so much more to tell. It's just so complicated... And this is just my story. Every person is different. It got longer than i wanted, some stuff might seem confusing but i tried. I hope it's readable and understandable. I'll spoiler it. + Show Spoiler + I have caring great parents, was good student and overall a really bright kid. Working class household but the kids were always first as it's supposed to be. I was just crying a lot and still do and emotions and feelings are kind of a book with seven seals to me, just too powerful most of the time in both ways (hate/love). Also people touching me in any way was always a no-go until i absolutely trust them. Also heavy claustrophobia and some other stuff not nice to have. When growing up, problems were starting to get serious. I was just not able to understand myself. Why those strong feelings all the time? Why this strange behavior? At the time i finished school (abitur/a-levels without ever learning, bright kid heh?), i started taking drugs. Weed only for the first years but others were to come. Finally i had something to soothe myself but as you can imagine it wasn't quite healthy on the long run. My behavior made it hard to find friends many people saw me as a weirdo, i guess and i can't blame 'em. Worst were the questions like "your quite attractive and so nice, why you don't have a girlfriend", ("you're so smart, why don't you make more of your life" became my favorite in the last years) and all that stuff. Good questions i also asked myself thousands of times. Why? I did not have answer so something must be really wrong with me. But what? Then there was this evening. One of the evenings i normally really cherish. I was 23 at that time just started university (which i quit after a couple of months). Two of my best friends (of the 5 or so overall left...) and me just getting drunk, playing cards, having fun, me feeling normal. We started to wrestle at some point just for the lulz which ended in my best friend, who is a lot stronger than me, pinning me to the ground without me being able to move. That's when i was "triggered" (as i know now). I started hyperventilating, crying, every muscle in my body cramped and my brain just went nuts. He was going nuts as well, like "i'm so sorry, what did i do, i'm so sorry, what did i do? please calm down!". Second worst night of my life. That's when i realised there's something terribly wrong. But I was still not able to get it together, thinking for days about that and my whole life so far. I decided to kill myself in the end, because nothing made sense anymore. No "crying for help" shit just end it. I am a man of principles though and when i was ready to jump the train, the thought came up, that i cannot do this to my parents and my family. Better a failing son, than one who killed himself. (to all the smartasses who go like "if you really want to kill yourself you'd be dead"). So i kept on going for years without any destination just for the sake of staying alive. Changing my shitty jobs every year or so when people started coming too close asking those damn questions again. Then there was this worst day of my life: Four years ago my brother beat my sister over something trivial. Violence never occured in my family and i was not willing to let him get away with this (family/best friends > all). When i told my mother i am going to beat the crap out of him, she told me i don't understand! After i insisted she has to declare to me why, or i am still going to beat him she told the story (crying): Family Holiday, he was 9 i was 5, a guy looked after us when my parents wanted an evening for themselves, you can put the rest together for yourself... Explained a lot. After first hearing the story i wasn't even thinking about myself and she wasn't speaking about me. I have absolutely no memory of it and already stopped caring about myself in general. I was just thinking about that *guy* (words can not describe the hate) destroying the life of my brother. But it didn't take long until it clicked. I had to swear never to talk to my brother and father about this. I agreed with this because he's finally able to lead a normal life atm and i don't want to pull him back in there. Concerning my father, he definately would have killed the guy if he knew, so he doesn't. Should he know? I decided he shouldn't because he's a great dad (He's over 70, no need to put that onto him). I can just be sure my brother was raped and i was there as well. What did he do to me? Should i be glad i have no memory of it? Would it help me to deal with it if i knew? Unfortunately i was always able to hide my problems from my parents quite well. Maybe they never made the connection and i don't blame 'em. Or do they know and the guilt is just too much? The human mind does crazy things sometimes. Never talked to them about it, even after i knew the story. Always tried my best to fake that everything is OK. I am so damaged, even after knowing all this stuff it's impossible for me to deal with it and my strange behavior stays the same. Also i just cannot talk about it to anyone and still fake being ok as far as possible. This is basically the first time... I am 31 now. Well my body is, my mind clearly isn't. My second try finding a therapist starts soon. I really would like to be happy again, because killing myself is not an option for me. My case is kind of soft and it was enough to severely damage my whole psyche. What about children being molested over years or even by their own family? I don't want to imagine. That's also one of the things that keeps me going. "There's worse. If they can make it, you have to!" So why am i telling this? I don't know for sure. It helps that's one thing. The other is, i want pedos to know what they are doing to children. Too many people are way too tolerant in this thread. Yes perhaps many of the victims are able to lead a normal life, but if you risk to destroy someone just to fullfil your sexual needs, you deserve the worst! If you feel those needs, seek help! If you can't help it and cross the line or support CP in any way, you deserve to die in pain. I get a bad conscience from killing a fly, but if you are pedo who actually molested a child, i could kill you with my bare hands without feeling any remorse. The thing is though, this guy DIDN'T actually hurt a child. He just downloaded some images. He didn't support the industry either, because he got them from a filesharing site, he didn't pay for them. If pirates are hurting the music industry by downloading without paying, then I don't see how this guy could be supporting the CP industry. I'm not saying it isn't bad, it definitely IS. And he definitely should face some kind of punishment, like big fines, maybe a little jail time, and certainly rehab. The people who actually made the CP are the ones to hate. They're the ones who should be locked up for good. But giving this guy life in prison would be like giving a smalltime pothead life in prison while the dealers only get a few years. | ||
sevencck
Canada698 Posts
On November 09 2011 09:37 r00ty wrote: OK, f**k it. So here's an example from the other side. First of all why is it so goddamn hard to talk about it at all? While writing this i was mostly thinking to just delete it and forget about it. This site is normally not the place to talk about it, but many arguments in this thread made me feel sick. I see pedos/near-pedos telling their story but none of the victims, so here it is. It's not well written i'm not a native english speaker and there's so much more to tell. It's just so complicated... And this is just my story. Every person is different. It got longer than i wanted, some stuff might seem confusing but i tried. I hope it's readable and understandable. I'll spoiler it. + Show Spoiler + I have caring great parents, was good student and overall a really bright kid. Working class household but the kids were always first as it's supposed to be. I was just crying a lot and still do and emotions and feelings are kind of a book with seven seals to me, just too powerful most of the time in both ways (hate/love). Also people touching me in any way was always a no-go until i absolutely trust them. Also heavy claustrophobia and some other stuff not nice to have. When growing up, problems were starting to get serious. I was just not able to understand myself. Why those strong feelings all the time? Why this strange behavior? At the time i finished school (abitur/a-levels without ever learning, bright kid heh?), i started taking drugs. Weed only for the first years but others were to come. Finally i had something to soothe myself but as you can imagine it wasn't quite healthy on the long run. My behavior made it hard to find friends many people saw me as a weirdo, i guess and i can't blame 'em. Worst were the questions like "your quite attractive and so nice, why you don't have a girlfriend", ("you're so smart, why don't you make more of your life" became my favorite in the last years) and all that stuff. Good questions i also asked myself thousands of times. Why? I did not have answer so something must be really wrong with me. But what? Then there was this evening. One of the evenings i normally really cherish. I was 23 at that time just started university (which i quit after a couple of months). Two of my best friends (of the 5 or so overall left...) and me just getting drunk, playing cards, having fun, me feeling normal. We started to wrestle at some point just for the lulz which ended in my best friend, who is a lot stronger than me, pinning me to the ground without me being able to move. That's when i was "triggered" (as i know now). I started hyperventilating, crying, every muscle in my body cramped and my brain just went nuts. He was going nuts as well, like "i'm so sorry, what did i do, i'm so sorry, what did i do? please calm down!". Second worst night of my life. That's when i realised there's something terribly wrong. But I was still not able to get it together, thinking for days about that and my whole life so far. I decided to kill myself in the end, because nothing made sense anymore. No "crying for help" shit just end it. I am a man of principles though and when i was ready to jump the train, the thought came up, that i cannot do this to my parents and my family. Better a failing son, than one who killed himself. (to all the smartasses who go like "if you really want to kill yourself you'd be dead"). So i kept on going for years without any destination just for the sake of staying alive. Changing my shitty jobs every year or so when people started coming too close asking those damn questions again. Then there was this worst day of my life: Four years ago my brother beat my sister over something trivial. Violence never occured in my family and i was not willing to let him get away with this (family/best friends > all). When i told my mother i am going to beat the crap out of him, she told me i don't understand! After i insisted she has to declare to me why, or i am still going to beat him she told the story (crying): Family Holiday, he was 9 i was 5, a guy looked after us when my parents wanted an evening for themselves, you can put the rest together for yourself... Explained a lot. After first hearing the story i wasn't even thinking about myself and she wasn't speaking about me. I have absolutely no memory of it and already stopped caring about myself in general. I was just thinking about that *guy* (words can not describe the hate) destroying the life of my brother. But it didn't take long until it clicked. I had to swear never to talk to my brother and father about this. I agreed with this because he's finally able to lead a normal life atm and i don't want to pull him back in there. Concerning my father, he definately would have killed the guy if he knew, so he doesn't. Should he know? I decided he shouldn't because he's a great dad (He's over 70, no need to put that onto him). I can just be sure my brother was raped and i was there as well. What did he do to me? Should i be glad i have no memory of it? Would it help me to deal with it if i knew? Unfortunately i was always able to hide my problems from my parents quite well. Maybe they never made the connection and i don't blame 'em. Or do they know and the guilt is just too much? The human mind does crazy things sometimes. Never talked to them about it, even after i knew the story. Always tried my best to fake that everything is OK. I am so damaged, even after knowing all this stuff it's impossible for me to deal with it and my strange behavior stays the same. Also i just cannot talk about it to anyone and still fake being ok as far as possible. This is basically the first time... I am 31 now. Well my body is, my mind clearly isn't. My second try finding a therapist starts soon. I really would like to be happy again, because killing myself is not an option for me. My case is kind of soft and it was enough to severely damage my whole psyche. What about children being molested over years or even by their own family? I don't want to imagine. That's also one of the things that keeps me going. "There's worse. If they can make it, you have to!" So why am i telling this? I don't know for sure. It helps that's one thing. The other is, i want pedos to know what they are doing to children. Too many people are way too tolerant in this thread. Yes perhaps many of the victims are able to lead a normal life, but if you risk to destroy someone just to fullfil your sexual needs, you deserve the worst! If you feel those needs, seek help! If you can't help it and cross the line or support CP in any way, you deserve to die in pain. I get a bad conscience from killing a fly, but if you are pedo who actually molested a child, i could kill you with my bare hands without feeling any remorse. Thanks for sharing all of this. I'm sorry for your pain, I really am, I can't fully identify with it obviously, because I just can't make myself feel this way about someone (the bolded sentence). Just to be clear, I'm certainly not defending CP, but I can be fully against it while being against killing someone involved in it. Similarly, I can be fully against it while being against sentencing someone found guilty of accessing it to life in prison. I do agree that if you find someone abusing a child in that way, he should be given a very stiff sentence. I guess even though I think it's horrible, I'm fortunate enough to have an emotional distance from the issue that you weren't lucky enough to have. No matter how horrible I might see someone guilty of that as, there is another part of me that sees them as a human being who has problems and pain in their life. I know that's not what you want to hear, and I don't want to offend you by saying it, but nevertheless I believe it's at least somewhat true. For that reason I always hated "to catch a predator," or forcing people convicted of such crimes to tell people they were found guilty of it. It's taking someone who's already fucked up and crippling them beyond belief in a horrible way. It won't help them change, and we're capable of showing more compassion than that. Anyway, I hope you never have to get your hands on a pedophile. | ||
SupLilSon
Malaysia4123 Posts
On November 09 2011 08:01 Brosaurus wrote: Why are we ready to lock away someone who looks on child porn based on the idea that they are creating a market for the abuse of children. Yet, our community will exonerate pot smokers who monetarily support the cartels that have been murdering people for decades in Latin America. Just some food for thought. That's why my friends and I get our bud from Cali, grown in the US. No monetary aid to drug cartels. Also, by that reasoning, anyone who purchases Nike products is perpetuating child labor around the world. Almost any purchase you make is probably contributing in some small way to an "immoral" cause. That being said, I agree with you he shouldn't be pinned with the charge of perpetuating child abuse if he has never physically touched a child. He should be punished yes, but not nearly as harshly as this. | ||
Dark_Chill
Canada3353 Posts
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Azzur
Australia6254 Posts
NanaCry's post is a very powerful one about "the other side". | ||
Tektos
Australia1321 Posts
On November 09 2011 11:52 Dark_Chill wrote: If you have people close to you who share the belief that this person and people like him should be executed, what do you do. I'm horrified by what these people (people close to me) think, but I can't seem to get them to see something really simple to see. Any suggestions? There will forever be ignorance in this world and people who throw reasoned logic out the window and instead choose to follow blind emotion. So sadly, there is nothing you can do. | ||
Eschaton
United States1245 Posts
On November 09 2011 10:57 SupLilSon wrote: Show nested quote + On November 09 2011 08:01 Brosaurus wrote: Why are we ready to lock away someone who looks on child porn based on the idea that they are creating a market for the abuse of children. Yet, our community will exonerate pot smokers who monetarily support the cartels that have been murdering people for decades in Latin America. Just some food for thought. That's why my friends and I get our bud from Cali, grown in the US. No monetary aid to drug cartels. Also, by that reasoning, anyone who purchases Nike products is perpetuating child labor around the world. Almost any purchase you make is probably contributing in some small way to an "immoral" cause. That being said, I agree with you he shouldn't be pinned with the charge of perpetuating child abuse if he has never physically touched a child. He should be punished yes, but not nearly as harshly as this. What makes you think pot grown in cali isn't grown by drug lords? It's a well known fact that there are guys with guns out in certain areas of the northern Californian forest that will kill you for disturbing their growing operation. I smoke too, but I'm just questioning your reasoning for absolving yourself from guilt. | ||
Hattori_Hanzo
Singapore1229 Posts
America's fucked. Next up, viewing intellectual property without permission is stealing. Oh wait, thar's what all the studios want the world to believe. We need to stop this shit... Now. | ||
r00ty
Germany1037 Posts
Just felt many people weren't taking the effects serious enough ("it's just pictures"), that was the main point. I did not want to say they all have to be killed, i just loose my temper a bit when thinking too much about it... In fact (might sound crazy now), i also say the sentence for that guy is too hard. He needs help first of all. But i stick to my point of view, if they cross the line, they cannot expect mercy. Where to draw the line? I shouldn't be asked for obvious reasons. If you get off to CP, think about what had to be done to produce it... Get Help! If you accept all the horrible consequences just for your sexual pleasue, don't expect mercy. If you actively take part in it, go to hell. If you are so sick you just can't help it and and are just not able to control yourselves, what to do? Let me put it like this: Was Jeffrey Dahmer certifiably insane? Damn yes he was! Did he still deserve to die? Hell yeah! NanaCry's post was really strong in deed and the post and the answers to it were one of the main reasons i wrote my story. He got messed up by getting shown a picture. How messed up must the girls be? | ||
qrs
United States3637 Posts
On November 10 2011 11:01 r00ty wrote: Would he still have deserved to die if he hadn't killed all those people and instead had just downloaded pictures of the murders?If you get off to CP, think about what had to be done to produce it... Get Help! If you accept all the horrible consequences just for your sexual pleasue, don't expect mercy. If you actively take part in it, go to hell. If you are so sick you just can't help it and and are just not able to control yourselves, what to do? Let me put it like this: Was Jeffrey Dahmer certifiably insane? Damn yes he was! Did he still deserve to die? Hell yeah! | ||
r00ty
Germany1037 Posts
On November 10 2011 11:03 qrs wrote: Show nested quote + Would he still have deserved to die if he hadn't killed all those people and instead had just downloaded pictures of the murders?On November 10 2011 11:01 r00ty wrote: If you get off to CP, think about what had to be done to produce it... Get Help! If you accept all the horrible consequences just for your sexual pleasue, don't expect mercy. If you actively take part in it, go to hell. If you are so sick you just can't help it and and are just not able to control yourselves, what to do? Let me put it like this: Was Jeffrey Dahmer certifiably insane? Damn yes he was! Did he still deserve to die? Hell yeah! No he wouldn't. What's wrong with you? Are you even trying to get the context? Ok, i didn't make myself clear enough. I wanted to point out, that if someone actually raped a child and can't help but giving into his needs, then to me it wouldn't matter how insane he was, he has to be removed from society. Had to edit sry. | ||
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