Dating: How's your luck? - Page 561

I guess I should start from the very beginning of meeting this girl. For this I will refer to her as "Rachel". Edit: I realize the background is very extensive and I go on each detail of meeting this girl. You can skip down to the texts if you dont wanna be hardcore and read the background. No harm done!

The first time I got to hangout with Rachel was at a party/rager back in March. I was a Freshman and she was a Sophomore. We grinded and danced but I didn't hook up with her because I wasn't totally comfortable getting with a girl that was drunk when I was sober. Regardless we had a good time and she gave me her number before I went home. A lot
of my friends thought I got with her but I let them know that I did not because I thought it'd be creepy for me to do so.

I texted Rachel for about a week afterward and things were going well. The following Friday after the party I talked to her after a school basketball game and asked her out for the next day. She told me she was busy hanging with some of her girlfriends but that she was interested. This was my first time really asking out a girl so my thoughts were along the lines of "Hell yeah!!!"

Well the next weekend I was sleeping over with a couple of my good friends and they told me that she had hooked up with a senior the day she had told me she was "with friends" and more specifically the day after I asked her out. Well this kind of depressed me and because, well, I didn't think she would do that right after I asked her out. She was not committed to me so there was nothing for me to be angry about but honestly i was kind of hurt. She kind of had a reputation as being a partier so I don't think I should've been all that surprised.

*Que 6 months of just texting and snapchatting here and there. Nothing big happens.

It was August and I had just returned back to my homestate after visiting family overseas. Our communicating with each other had increased a lot as school came closer. Well one time we were texting and she asked me if I wanted to go to dinner with some of her friends and like any sophomore hanging with upperclassman especially cute girls is pretty awesome. Her friend picked me up and we went out to a diner and it was pretty fun. I was shy at first but once I warmed up it was really a nice time. This was the first time I really got to talk and hang out with her.

The next time I would hang out with Rachel would be October when she invited me and a Junior friend of mine to a house party thrown by a friend of hers. It was my first time drinking and being with her alone. We didnt drink too much since I had a appointment early the next day and neither did she since she had a dancing competition the next day. Well I was feeling pretty good until I realized I would have to leave in about 20 minutes. I had been hanging with her for most of the night and I talked to her and told her that I would be leaving soon and if she wanted to do something (IE hook up) before I left. She said yes (Yay!!!) but wanted to finish talking with her friends. I ended up having to leave with my Junior friend to go home (He was my ride) and we were hugging good bye and I kissed her on her forehead while we were hugging. She looked at me and paused. Then she kissed me and it was a great feeling. My friend forgot where his keys were so I hugged her again after he found them and we kissed again as we left.

So to recap so far: Girl I like and I meet after around half a year of flirting. We kiss but don't hook up.
Well we start to facetime and call each other on the weekend and text each other daily. I started to walk with her to class and I started to think that I was falling for this girl. We went to a pizza place maybe a week after the party to support our school's best buddies club but we got there late and no one was left. We ended up talking and eating just the two of us and it was awesome. She had a great time and after maybe an hour of us talking her dad came to pick her up, I shook his hand met her dog and then they left. We didn't kiss but it was pretty romantic.

That weekend there were 2 parties going on but she could not get the person hosting the one she wanted to go to invite me so I went to a different one that was hosted by her grade because I could not go with Rachel as I was not invited. What followed was pretty strange. Everyone left the party she wanted to go to that was "exclusive" to go the one that was more open house which I was at. Rachel got ditched at the exclusive party and kept calling me asking me what was happening and what I was doing and what people were doing. Well Rachel ended up at the party I was at and I embraced her and we kissed and went into the party. Well I realized that she was having trouble walking as she was so drunk and once we got inside we just talked with her friends. It was getting kind of late and I asked her if she wanted to go upstairs (Where there werent people so we could hu) and she said yeah in a little bit. Well a little turns into a long time and I just sit down on a couch talking with a few friends. Well she comes over and lays down on the couch/ on me and I can tell she is not feeling well. She apologizes to me saying that she wants to but that she is too tired/drunk. I tell her that its ok and I go home after hugging her good bye (no kiss).

The next day we are texting and Rachel tells me that she can tell that i am pissed at her. I assure her that i am not angry at her but tell her that I feel like she was not interested in me or else she would've drunken less. She says that's not the case and we carry on texting and facetiming like usual throughout the next couple of weeks. We start adding kissy emojjis at the end of conversations which makes me think we are headed toward being a couple...

After a football game the next week Rachel asks me what i was doing and i tell her nothing and she asks me if she wants to go to her house (hell yeah!). Her bestfriend comes with us which was fine it was just gonna be the 2 of them but Rachel invited me to come too. I meet Rachel's parents and I talk with them and have dinner with her family before Rachel, her best friend and I wind up chilling in an enclosed room at the side of her house. Rachel and I end up cuddling and Rachels best friend asks if Rachel wants her to take her shower now (an obvious question asking Rachel if she wants to be left alone with me to hook up) top which Rachel says no its ok. I hug her goodbye a short while later (no kiss) and go home. At this point I was wondering why she hadn't wanted to hook up with me if she was interested in me.

Side note: she had hooked up with a lot more people before me. A lot of them when she had just met them so its not like she waits for all guys this long.

Well I get the idea that I should ask her if she wants to be my girlfriend to get an idea of where she wants to be with me in a relationship. I talk to her 2 days later after school and she tells me that she likes me but that we should just be friends and see where that takes us. Im like ok just friends it is but then she kisses me goodbye which confuses me because she had just told me she wanted to be friends!!!!

Well she texts me a short while later and I'll just transcribe the conversation because its really my only direct source that is not my memory:


I tell myself I should just give her space and she texts me a few times afterward but we dont do anything for 3 weeks besides text or say hi every once in a while. I thought this was what she wanted me to do untilllllll she texts me last night about "What we were/are". Keep in mind this is after 2-3 weeks of very little talk. I had pretty much gotten over her at this point and had put whatever we were behind us. (I should mention that this was yesterday 11/28/14) Here we go

First some small talk... Then...


We talk. Ends with me telling her we should just be friends. Rachel tells me its been so long where do we start?

I tell her it starts by us talking more. I told her I would text her tomorrow.

Tomorrow is now today...I am in need of some advice on what to do from here.

I realize that this has been a long post and I thank everyone who has taken the time to read it and talk to me. I just feel young and naive and confused and I do not know what to do. I like Rachel as she is beautiful, smart, funny everything someone would want in someone else.

I just don't know what to do.

tl;dr: I thought she wanted space. She tells me she likes me but doesnt want to be my girlfriend and doesnt want to be just a friend. She has brushed off my advances at hooking up. Advice?