We are extremely close to shutting down this thread for the same reasons the PUA thread was shut down. While some of the time this thread contains actual discussion with people asking help and people giving nice advice, it often gets derailed by rubbish that should not be here. The moderation team will be trying to steer this thread in a different direction from now on.
Posts of the following nature are banned: 1) ANYTHING regarding PUA. If your post contains the words 'alpha' or 'beta' or anything of that sort please don't hit post. 2) Stupid brags. You can tell us about your nice success stories with someone, but posts such as 'lol 50 Tinder matches' are a no-no. 3) Any misogynistic bullshit, including discussion about rape culture. 4) One night stands and random sex. These are basically brags that invariably devolve into gender role discussions and misogynistic comments.
Last chance, guys. This thread is for dating advice and sharing dating stories. While gender roles, sociocultural norms, and our biological imperative to reproduce are all tangentially related, these subjects are not the main purpose of the thread. Please AVOID these discussions. If you want to discuss them at length, go to PMs or start a blog. If you disagree with someone's ideologies, state that you disagree with them and why they won't work from a dating standpoint and move on. We will not tolerate any lengthy derailments that aren't directly about dating.
well. this summer i texted a girl i was crushing on last year, but she had a boyfriend then and we cut contact. That same day she followed me home and we doinked. To my surprise, she was still together with the other guy and was supposed to move in with him the day after. She didn't, broke up with him and moved in with me instead.
was great for a while but obviously she's not exactly reliable so she moved out after summer.
Then, a total 10 who was crushing on me 5 years ago, while i had a gf, moved back to sweden and started some intense flirting out of nowhere. haven't really spoken to her in a couple of years so i was surprised again. But well, she want's the D and shes' coming over this weekend.
I joined the local volleyball club about six weeks ago, unfortunately I was only attending two "sessions" so far. Now theres one woman, she´s a teacher and about three years older than me ( approximately 26 ). In my opinion she´s way less complicated than the girls at my age (or the younger ones) which is really pleseant. Plus we get along pretty well... Now, we do not see each other very often so I would like to make the best out of every chance I get to see her.
My question, is someone here experienced in dating "older" women? Somehow new territory for me...
there is a world of different between a 20 year old and a 26 year old. they want completely different things, unless you are dealing with the rare mature 20 year old.
On September 11 2013 12:50 VayneAuthority wrote: there is a world of different between a 20 year old and a 26 year old. they want completely different things, unless you are dealing with the rare mature 20 year old.
On September 10 2013 16:05 lannisport wrote: Okay I have a question for you guys, how is your success with online dating and what do you use in particular?
I'm in a new city and what I don't have is a cool group of friends who can hook me up with some quality babes. I don't have facebook anymore either which it turns out was a great way to attract opportunities without doing much work.
So I was thinking I'd try okcupid or something like that. I'm super busy so I'd like to have a system in place with the efficiency of the postal service, well, presuming nothing comes a few weeks late.
I've gone on a few dates these past weeks but the women I've gone out with have done absolutely nothing for me, though I am seeing one of them verrryyy casually (We BARELY text outside of "Can I come over?"). At this point I'm looking for more interesting but nonetheless beautiful girls. But then I can't help but think that those types of girls wouldn't need okcupid to begin with... And that that is why I think that having several social circles and a tight group of "cool" friends is the ost efficient and effective way to meet quality girls. But that shit takes a lot of time and investment.
My success rate online always was and still is pretty high, but I have never really been into the "mainstream" dating sites. It should be noted however that I know lots of girls that use those kind of things because they get hit on all the time irl. To use a more direct quote: "I don't want to get invited for a couple of drinks over a week or so to find out that the guy is into anal, listens to shitty music or reads shitty books. I'd rather just click those kind of guys away and deal with the ones that seem interesting."
For me personally I have great experiences when it comes to more "kinky" dating sites (whether you're looking for girls who are into bdsm or who are specifically looking for couples, you'll find sites for it) simply because most people who are into those things suck major balls at screening it when trying to date "normally". It's similarly awesome with subcultures no matter whether it's about certain a certain music-/artstyle or whatever. If any kind of thing like that is something you value highly you will probably find a dating site where you can be successful.
For super standard vanilla dating I think it's a lot harder but I also never tried to focus on it.
I'm in a new city and what I don't have is a cool group of friends who can hook me up with some quality babes.
...or you could like go out and meet people. =P
Tho "I need someone to show me around town" might be the best thing ever on this planet.
I do go out and meet people (Although I haven't found the 'right places'). I haven't met a single person at a bar or lounge that catches my attention besides being initially fun or whatever. I actually have my own meetup group as well and I've met a couple of cool people there but usually if there are 20-30 people at an event I'll make an effort to see 1-2 people outside of the meetups.
But I start to get busier I need better filters. I'm going to try okcupid because you can search for specific tags which is pretty cool.
Do you recommend any other sites? I' not into BDSM but I'm into cute geeky girls. But at the core I want to meet people who are fun (girls who can make ME laugh), cool (Do they have their own business? Are they doing their own thing? Are they intelligent or well read? Tomboyish? Adventurers?) and people who are eager to learn and grow and to try new things out (i.e. people who share my values). I like geeks I do but a girl I saw for a little while when I first arrived here was REALLY into games which can get pretty boring. She had like 450 hours clocked on some obscure JRPG. I would say I'm a well rounded, athletic geek. What kind of sites are tailored to that "type"?
On September 11 2013 12:50 VayneAuthority wrote: there is a world of different between a 20 year old and a 26 year old. they want completely different things, unless you are dealing with the rare mature 20 year old.
On September 11 2013 12:50 VayneAuthority wrote: there is a world of different between a 20 year old and a 26 year old. they want completely different things, unless you are dealing with the rare mature 20 year old.
three years older than me ( approximately 26 )
26-3 = 23. He's 23, shes 26.
he said he's never dated older, so I was comparing to 3 years younger. you should in fact not approach a 26 year old like you would a 20 year old.
There isn't much that changes between approaching a woman who is 20 or 40 years old.
Sure, some topics change, the amount of money thrown around or the locations you visit changes but all the general principles stay the same.
On September 11 2013 12:50 VayneAuthority wrote: there is a world of different between a 20 year old and a 26 year old. they want completely different things, unless you are dealing with the rare mature 20 year old.
three years older than me ( approximately 26 )
26-3 = 23. He's 23, shes 26.
he said he's never dated older, so I was comparing to 3 years younger. you should in fact not approach a 26 year old like you would a 20 year old.
There isn't much that changes between approaching a woman who is 20 or 40 years old.
Sure, some topics change, the amount of money thrown around or the locations you visit changes but all the general principles stay the same.
pretty big difference past the "approaching" phase which is kind of a walk in the park really
I'm single now. I'm not going to make a blog about it. Fuck this. Hawk was right, but I chose not to listen. We broke up mutually and now I'm totally lost. I'm just going to make an ass out of myself and weep until I feel better. It's funny, I don't want to feel better. I just want my love.
I met this girl 3 weeks ago. We both instantly got interested in each other and we both got feelings for each other. About a week ago we confessed these feelings and are spending a lot of time together. Due to past experience for both of us, we want to take it really slow to not mess anything up. We can't stop thinking of each other. She also has this new years resolution to not get a boyfriend in 2013, which I happen to think is a good idea, because both of us do not want to rush into things. This is also because I recently (4 months ago) broke up with my ex. So my question is, is there a chance that she might loose her feelings and friend zone me, because we take it slow? Do you guys have any experience with this?
On September 12 2013 21:50 ThePhan2m wrote: I met this girl 3 weeks ago. We both instantly got interested in each other and we both got feelings for each other. About a week ago we confessed these feelings and are spending a lot of time together. Due to past experience for both of us, we want to take it really slow to not mess anything up. We can't stop thinking of each other. She also has this new years resolution to not get a boyfriend in 2013, which I happen to think is a good idea, because both of us do not want to rush into things. This is also because I recently (4 months ago) broke up with my ex. So my question is, is there a chance that she might loose her feelings and friend zone me, because we take it slow? Do you guys have any experience with this?
You should have sex with her as soon as you can or somebody else will. What people say =/= what people want.
On September 12 2013 22:06 farvacola wrote: Take it from Cloud; though that 17 year old's face said no, her body said yes, and the rest is history as they say.
GTFO with that judgmental puritanical BS. It's 100% natural for men to be attracted to any woman who is fertile, and I for one make no apologies for my desires as a man.
And yes, he should have sex with her asap. Sex is what turns attraction into deeper feelings. She might not want a a serious relationship for a year, but I seriously doubt a healthy young woman will go a year without sex, at least barring any hang ups or other issues like religion. You can take it slow and still have sex.
Nah, your delicate sensibilities are not my concern, and when PUA attitudes combine with teenage ignorance and a gross older man, I see no harm in calling a spade a spade. Cloud regularly gives terrible, ill founded advice that oftentimes reads like the back cover of some sticky book on gaming women. If that's the sort of dating world you want to live in, fine. Just don't get hissy when others find it in bad taste and are willing to say so.
So this girl i like in school, ( she's 18. real athlete type, swims, tennis and just gives people the "I'm always improving" vibe which i find really attractive. )
During the holidays, we went out together in a group once, we had fun and everything and i tried to escalate things from there. However when school started, she has her own group of friends and I kinda botched things with a letter.
She said she lost the letter I wrote asking her out which I find it hard to believe hahaha I might be wrong though.
today we met up for some extra curricular activities and during the exercise, we had to write each other letters. She tells me to continue being mysterious, knowledgeable and confident, that I'm reliable. ( yes I help her too damn much, she's the president of my club )
how would you carry on from here? I'm trying to encourage more communication between us because I find that lacking sorely..
EPT
