I think you're doing great. Finish your chemistry degree, and then do your military service. When you get back, get a job in chemistry. Keep moving forward. I had a very similar experience to you (getting my ass kicked by classes and wondering if I was doing what I really wanted to). I did eventually graduate and just recently got a job in my field. I enjoy it a lot more than i thought I would. You're doing great, keep up the hard work and re take whatever classes you need to.
6 years after retirement. - Page 3
Blogs > Rain |
greg112358
United States1 Post
I think you're doing great. Finish your chemistry degree, and then do your military service. When you get back, get a job in chemistry. Keep moving forward. I had a very similar experience to you (getting my ass kicked by classes and wondering if I was doing what I really wanted to). I did eventually graduate and just recently got a job in my field. I enjoy it a lot more than i thought I would. You're doing great, keep up the hard work and re take whatever classes you need to. | ||
mlm
Austria164 Posts
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Ero-Sennin
United States756 Posts
I wish you the best and I hope you find something that pleases you. | ||
geokilla
Canada8217 Posts
According to the venn diagram, if I'm able to be successful in insurance as I get older, then at the very least I got 2 bubbles right. But I'd literally need to double or even triple my current income within the next 10 to 15 years if I want to afford a decent condo and drive a decent car ($35k to $40k). Toronto is just that expensive to live in right now. At the very least, keep on trying Rain and don't give up. Ask your classmates to teach you or find a tutor. There is nothing wrong with getting a tutor. | ||
doihy
668 Posts
Believe it or not , your experiences with progaming / moving to another country will be a great asset in your future interviewing process for anything. | ||
CCa1ss1e
Canada3231 Posts
I've been reading some good books lately though. Brian Tracy, Tony Robbins and all the other big names have some great self mastery material that you can read and/or listen to. I've also finished both of Jen Sincero's You Are A Badass books too, which are great. Honestly, I still feel stuck, same as you. We have to realize that we are the architects of our own lives and that we are 100% responsible for everything that has happened and will happened in our own lives. The best way to find happiness is to follow your joy, whatever that may be. The only way to light a fire underneath yourself is to constantly work towards something that is truly meaningful to yourself. Another good book/movie is The Secret. Some people don't believe in the Law of Attraction and the pseudoscience behind that movie. But it's still interesting. Good luck and all the best. | ||
Liquid`Sheth
United States2095 Posts
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F3arless
Canada45 Posts
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j0k3rj0k3r
1 Post
It's been years since I played SC but I ran across your post and I had to make an account to comment. I can understand this feeling of being lost. I don't know much about life or about SC, but I do know chemistry. It sounds like computational chemistry might interest you. It combines aspects of computers that you have found interesting with the best parts of chemistry. You don't need to be a wizard programmer or mathematician either. Also, I think you are overlooking your own achievements. You learned english, played SC at a pro level, and made it to a top tier university. Consider reaching out to some of the professors at uni to do research in their labs. This may help you find direction. I've found in life it is better to focus on what you are good at instead of a grand reason of being. | ||
Krootie
Sweden13 Posts
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Defessus
United States164 Posts
On March 12 2018 02:31 Rain wrote: Thanks for all the valuable advice! I guess I am not too late, and most people around my age are struggling with the same issue. Yea I guess I gotta work hard on things I'm doing right now, and I might be able to find something I truly enjoy. =]] Life is a journey, unique and precious to each of us. We are all living it together. If you're in Busan, near the airport, i'll buy you a meal sometime and we can talk about this wonderful journey. katalk ID is in my profile. | ||
KiLL_ORdeR
United States1518 Posts
I think you are exactly where you should be in life right now. When you think about it, you have already had an entire career where you were on the top of your field and you're only 24. Most people our age are just finishing school and getting their careers off the ground, doing grunt work or internships or work in a field that they didn't even study for. Most people with the experiences and learning you've had from SC2 are in their late 60's, early 70's. There's no reason for you to feel less than people you may have gone to high school with, or whatever. You chose a very different path by pursuing your passion and putting in the work to become a pro gamer, so I think it is OK to cut yourself some slack and accept that the rest of your life will be a bit different, but almost certainly for the better. I think this is a difficult time in everyone's life. We have to make adult decisions for the first time in our lives, and it feel like each one is so heavy. Additionally, the world is so different today than it was when our parents were our age, that it sometimes feels like there is no one to reach out to for help like we could growing up. I think it is very admirable that you were able to reach out for help or just tell your story and vent a little bit. That was a very healthy thing to do, and all of the kind words from people who remember you from your SC2 days must feel amazing! So, keep your chin up! You're in a great spot in your life, with some hard work ahead of you, but the fact that you were able to achieve as much as you did in SC2 is proof that you are more than capable of handling the hardship. If you want advice, check the spoiler, otherwise, gg gl on your journey, you got what it takes to be amazingly successful and happy!! + Show Spoiler + It seems like you are at a bit of a turning point with school, so I would suggest at least considering dropping out of school and getting your military service out of the way. I'm not sure what your financial or visa situation is right now, so it might not be possible. From what I know about visas though, it would probably be a lot easier for you to come back to America on a student visa after you finish your service to finish your degree than it would be to try and get another type of visa, especially a work visa since our government is trying to make it more difficult to get a work visa. The military should be a great experience for you, too. It probably sounds like the worst right now since you are forced to do it. But, if you just accept the fact that it has to get done, I think you can go through basic training and get placed into a field that will give you a lot of life experience. You may also find what you really want to do while you're in, which will give you more focus in life and make everything that comes next much easier. | ||
MayorITC
Korea (South)798 Posts
But think on the bright side. You escaped Hell Joseon and now live in the US where you speak English and Korean fluently. And even if being a progamer didn't pan out for you, it's an experience that most people don't have. So I think being a few years behind is a small price to pay for the opportunity you had and that unique experience probably gives you some insight that can't be found elsewhere. | ||
Rain
120 Posts
KawaiiRice! I definitely do remember you! I hope you are doing well! Haha I didn't know we go to same school. He might have graduated already =] | ||
Aunvilgodess
954 Posts
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Xax
475 Posts
it took me 10 years from my 20s well into my 30s to even be able to earn money in my dream profession (filmmaking) and it was worth it, definitely. Those "love" jobs, they take a lot of time to get into, there is a lot of competition, at first, funny enough just like in Starcraft! But only the strong prevail, only the strong keep on doing and and are able to live on a small enough income with maybe some help from their parents to keep going, to keep on dreaming and to be able to find something they love to do, at some point in their life and become happy. There are two things I want to tell you. First of all, it's never too late (look at this: http://fundersandfounders.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/04/lost-in-life-people-who-took-indirect-path-to-success-infographic.png). You can always start something new, and there is always enough time to do what you love to do. You have to believe that you CAN do it. And you definitely CAN. Playing Starcraft on such a high level is something that you have achieved as well, and it took you a long time! Second of all, happiness is made inside. Happiness is not achieved because you earn enough money so that your peers respect you. It is if you are happy with what you are doing. And you don't seem happy with what you have been doing right now, so probably you deep down know what you actually want to do? If not, then go on a soul search. Take some time off, maybe even do your military service to be able to have that time, to be able to "take two years off" and think about what you really want to do. Make yourself a plan during that military time, even if you only think about your dream and what you want to do for 10 minutes every day before you fall asleep. Then come out of the military and go for it. DO IT. Maybe it's something with progaming (NOT programming) that you want to do? I know, back in the day and even today for a lot of people gaming is laughable and not serious. All those great serious jobs, lawyers, economists, doctors, etc. etc., there are enough people doing those anyways. Why not look for a job that really satisfies you, but is not that "respected" YET? Did you try to reach out to teams or cooperations like the ESL, maybe work for IEM or something similar? Find your niche! You know what it takes to be a progamer and you are bilingual in Korean and English, what could your speciality be? FIND IT! LOVE IT! DO IT! You can! Let me know if you want to talk more and feel free to message me privately too. all the best and keep your head up, remember: - it's NEVER too late - you CAN achieve what you would love to do, so many people have, and they are making a living out of that - FIND YOUR NICHE, find that thing that you can do and would love to do and money will come GG | ||
L3gendary
Canada1470 Posts
I will say something that not many of the other posters are saying. I agree with others who are saying that 24 is still very young. If you are working as a professional by 30 you will have no problems financially in the long term. Many Phd's are well into their 30s! Even 30s is okay as long as you find your direction and are working towards a goal. But in my opinion, rather than trying to find something you "enjoy", "love", or whatever, come up with a list of careers that the market needs and will need in the future...something that there's money in! Then pick one of those and devote yourself to learning it and getting good at it. (Chemistry and especially computer science are fine choices!) You may not like it at first or even until after you graduate. But when you've been working for a while and gain confidence in your profession, pride in your work, and financial independence you will enjoy it a lot more. People enjoy and like the things they're good at, and people are good at the things they devote time to excelling in. You will have to "re-wire" your brain to think differently, to accept and take interest in the material you want to learn, but it will pay off in the end. Best of luck! | ||
escher
6 Posts
I don't have any great wisdom/advice that hasn't already been said, but I can definitely relate to your struggles... I'm a few years older than you, and still figuring out what I want from life. Thank you (everyone) for posting. This thread has actually helped me with some of the uncertainty I've been grappling with. | ||
Poopfeast 024
Gambia437 Posts
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Souma
2nd Worst City in CA8938 Posts
I dropped out of high school when I only had six months to go due to some very serious depression and gaming addiction. It was the darkest period of my life thus far, yet it was also the best decision of my life. After dropping out the depression did not fade for a long time, but it was the first step to getting my life back in order. For a year and a half I mainly stayed holed up in my bedroom playing games and minimized contact with people, including my family who resided in the same house. I had no motivation to do anything but game, let alone work or go back to school. I enrolled in community college when I was 19 when I began recovering just a bit. From dropping out to enrolling in college, I had always felt that I was far behind the rest of my friends, my cousins, and my peers at large. The weight of this pressure certainly didn't help my depression, nor did it inspire me to take action. It was just another source of anxiety. I began college not knowing what I wanted to do. Again, I had no motivation at this point except to play games. I chose to major in music because it was the one thing aside from video games that I enjoyed in my life; however, I had never learned how to play an instrument or sing as a kid. What I thought was a passion through endless hours awake and asleep listening to music was actually not a passion that would provide any ambition to my life, and I did not switch majors to programming because I knew things would end up the same way. In my second year of community college, I changed majors to Japanese Studies. I had always loved learning Japanese, watched anime almost as much as I played games, and actually felt like working in Japan would not be a bad idea. This tiny bit of hope that I felt regarding Japan was able to spur me through my studies (to an extent). I spent an extra year in community college due to the switch in majors, and ended up further behind my friends. By the time I transferred to my now alma mater, UCSD, my friends who were of the same age were graduating from their own. And again, that realization suffocated me. I was now 22 and starting my first year at UCSD. I was taking classes with kids who were 18-20. I was always older than my classmates (different from community college, which had a lot of older students), and any introductions to new friends always left them curious as to why I was at the point where I was. I was always too ashamed to tell anyone I was a high school dropout, so I always told people I took a break after high school. That was able to stave off any curiosity, but it never made me feel any better. I spent a year studying abroad in Japan during my second year at UCSD. It was the obvious thing for me to do, and I was lucky enough that government assistance plus scholarships enabled me to experience it. The year in Japan was absolutely magnificent, and it was around this point where I began to feel same change within myself. I felt that the holes inside of me were slowly being filled, and I was retrieving my "self," however it was not my past self, but a new self. A better self. When I came back from Japan in 2012, I was 24. By the time I graduated, I would be a month away from 25. I was a few years behind, and although Japan was a huge eye opener to me, I realized that I still had questions regarding my future. I no longer wanted to work and live in Japan, as much as I loved the people and the country. A life in Japan was just not for me; one year was plenty. Instead, the courses in university began to instill in me a lot of interest in politics and society. Living in Japan exposed me to various cultures (I lived in an international dorm) that provided me with a lot of insight into myself and the U.S., and I was suddenly ignited with a flame to change the world. I became absolutely engrossed in politics, and it was the first time I enjoyed anything outside of games and Japanese culture. I would graduate soon with a degree in Japanese, but that degree was already obsolete to me. I didn't feel the desire to completely switch majors again to pursue my new interest; instead, I began internships in the political sector during my final year of school. After interning for both a State Assemblymember and Congressmember, my dream of changing the world did not change, but my method of going about it did. I no longer wanted to work on the side of politicians, but decided that in the current climate, it would be more worthwhile to participate in grassroots efforts. After I graduated, I volunteered for a veterans organization for a year and spent a short time doing grassroots canvassing for a nonprofit. I became disenfranchised again. I realized that change did not come easily. Although I felt my intentions and actions were good, the majority around me seemed to close their eyes and ears to the problems of the country. I was devastated, although my dreams remained unchanged. However, I realized that my dreams will have to be pursued much later on in my life, when I've gained the experience, knowledge, connections, and money required to make the impact I really want to. And so I looked for a job--any job--that I could do while I tried to reinvent my path in life. I found a part-time marketing and sales job that I knew I wouldn't like, but I needed to build more experience, and most importantly, money to spend. All this time I was living with my parents, and thankfully for their support I didn't have to rush. My friends were already well into their careers at this point, but I didn't care how behind I was anymore. Throughout everything I experienced, I discovered that I am someone who just needs to do what they enjoy. Without enjoyment, there was no way for me to crawl through life doing some dead-end job just to pay the bills. That was not me and I knew it, so I refused to crumble to societal pressures and work just to make ends meet. In the middle of my new part-time job I got heavily involved with volunteering for Team Liquid's CS:GO subforum. I spent more hours writing, editing, coordinating, and brainstorming than I did at work or on video games or anime. Before I knew it I was so engrossed in what I was doing, everything I loved doing before just slowly slipped out of my life. I barely followed politics, the amount of hours I spent gaming steadily declined, and the amount of anime I watched decreased heavily. I absolutely loved doing what I did for Team Liquid. When I saw a job posting for an Esports Coordinator job at HTC, I mustered up my courage and applied. And thanks to the backing of the wonderful Nazgul and Bumblebee from TL, I got the job. And that is when my life took off. I am hitting 30 this year and doing what I absolutely love. I had always enjoyed gaming since before I can remember, and now I am involved in it, although in a different manner than being a player. Although I no longer work for HTC, I am now the Director of Esports at a startup company. I travel tons and enjoy most things about the job and industry at large (nothing's ever perfect of course). I've already caught up to my friends in salary, and have friends who have even gone back to school to earn a new degree as they didn't quite enjoy their first one. I would say that out of all my friends, I'm definitely the one enjoying what I do the most, and it is absolutely rewarding. And miraculously, I somehow even got myself engaged, even though I always told myself I would never get married before. Shit just happens. To sum it up, everyone has their own path and their own time. You should never feel pressured because you feel behind or because you don't know what you want to do. In life, you have to discover yourself, and you must do it at the pace most accommodating to you. For some people who are in the unfortunate position of absolutely needing to make ends meet and unable to wait, it does sadly make sense to have to force themselves to do whatever they can. Although I don't know your situation completely, just from guessing I think your circumstances are more similar to mine, and that you still have time to find your calling. Don't let the pressures and lack of motivation crush the future you never knew you could have. Continue walking, however slowly, towards the end of the tunnel. I assure you that without a doubt, there is something there for you. Just keep walking and never stay still. Don't be afraid of being forced back a few steps; every failure is a new learning experience and another chance at success. Standing still is worse than falling back. Move forward. Good luck to you. | ||
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