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Blogs > Liquid`Sheth
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Liquid`Sheth
Profile Blog Joined March 2010
United States2095 Posts
August 21 2013 01:34 GMT
#1
So I just wanted to kind of say whats new with me and whats going on lately here. I said a little on Reddit and on Chanman, but wanted to put it up here as well and in different words / more detail here.

So background for me is just, had hand issues, and I still do. I just had leg surgery 2 weeks ago, I'm going to go have the other leg done soon, and then I'll continue looking at getting hand surgery from many more doctors. (Just fixing old leg problems that aren't super needed, but torn ligaments hurt, and why not get it done) So anyway I started up college 2 days ago. My leg is killing me, and I have to walk / keep my leg down not up for like 9 hour days with college. Its a pain, but whatcha gonna do its my new life.

My goal with college is to eventually get a 4 year degree in chemistry and then re-evaluate. Possibly med-school from there, or stop and do something else while I apply for med-school. I'm about 1 1/2 years from my 4 year degree as of now. I recently said that if my hands were magically better (which they aren't, but maybe if I go to like 10 more doctors?) I'd probably still not come back to being an SC2 pro. And I guess I've never phrased it like that before, but its been something I've have to think about for a while. Do I want to go back to a pro-gaming life? Everyone always thinks its amazingly glamorous. And that pro-gamers should be appreciative that they can be a gamer at all as a living. And I understand why you can think that, but all in all its a very stressful tough life choice if you want to be one of the best. 9 hour college day, you think thats long? ha. Most progamers do longer then that every day. And sure 9 hours of play versus 9 hours as a resident, or working doing whatever (I'm a previous lawn care guy so I know work is harder then college) is still not amazingly easy.

Gaming all day every day isn't healthy for me as well. I lost a lot of weight when I couldn't play on the computer at all and had help from others (victor, robbie). I don't blame Sc2 for my weight problems at all just saying for me its easier without constantly sitting in front of the computer.

Traveling is tough. Especially when you travel once every week for 3 days or more. Or even once every other week. Its like your living two lives. Now imagine throwing in that sometimes you stay for a few weeks traveling in a row. And when your traveling its not a vacation. Very rarely do I do anything non-gaming related at these events. Your still playing a game (work) wherever you go traveling. And a lot of the times your under a lot more stress and you put in a lot more effort when you travel. Then you reap the reward of all your hard work.... or you get 6 pooled, or 2 raxed... ever seen someone rage really hard? Maybe this happened to them. It'd be like taking a risk and hoping it pays off, gambling on your own skill for instance. Then you lose. Maybe it was your mistake that you died, and then you just get angry at yourself. Now imagine repeating this over and over.

You may still get paid, but you know unless you win it won't continue, so the stress is up again! Maybe your job isn't stable, even though you worked that hard! It can be a tough job I assure you. Oh wait, you have a contract. Good thing in e-sports those are very reliable. Hm, maybe not if past experience is any guide. (TL is the best thing ever, not talking about those gods among men). Just in general e-sports teams can be shady. Even companies are shady. IPL still not paying players for instance is just one thing. One thing of many.

Hurray though now Blizzard is organizing tournaments for players. Anyway I don't even need to go over that, but clearly it doens't help players either. So now say that I'll stream. I'll just stream non-stop and maybe that'll work to pay my bills while I prep for my next tournament. But ya know what I lag a little bit when I stream / play. Also its harder because your playing for others watching. Maybe you forget to run some commercials. Maybe you decided to stream when Idra and Stephano are streaming so no one watched you. Maybe Ti3 is on and WCS at the same time and you just wanted to stream some GM level games. Its not always doable in a stable way. It is a tough job, where as other jobs can be stable (doctor for instance).

Anyway I can ramble on forever about my complaints about how it is tough to be a pro-gamer. And trust me I realize in terms of easiness its easier to be a mediocre pro-gamer then a mediocre lawn mower. But being a top level at either one takes tremendous effort and some luck. And who wants to be a mediocre pro-gamer? Not me. I see stuff like "when was the last time Sheth actually did anything worth while?". And despite having hand issues, even before that I wasn't tremendously impactful. I beat rain, I beat polt at an MLG, I did well in team leagues, and I did charity events and did well in some online events and tried a lot at lans. (Taeja knocked me out like 10x, and if it wasnt him it was HerO). I've gotten knocked out of NASL by the winner, then knocked out of Dreamhack by the winner (Puma/Hero), I lost 1-2 vs Leenock when he won the MLG. All in all its tough out there.

I have no one to blame but myself for not winning those. Maybe I wasn't skilled enough. Maybe instead of 10 hours I needed 11. Maybe I needed to live in Korea and completely abandon my family. But again, I'm not quite Naniwa, or TLO. I have a burning desire to be good, but not at an extremely high cost. And I realize thats what u need in e-sports. And trust me, I gave up a lot. I tried what I consider my best in Sc2. But it just wasn't enough. We can't all be winners. Games need losers too.

So anyway of late I'm starting up college. If my hands were better, maybe I'd give SC2 a try again. But maybe not. Maybe I'd just try and play/stream some on the side. Maybe I'd just continue to watch starcraft, cheer for my team and wish that one day I could live that life again deep down inside. Because even though its not the easiest, it was by far some of the best times of my life. And if I had to do anything over again, I'd mostly keep it the same.

****
Team LiquidUnderneath it all they were really quite nice. They just got screwed up. Mostly by stuff that wasn't entirely their fault.
Mahanaim
Profile Joined December 2012
Korea (South)1002 Posts
August 21 2013 01:38 GMT
#2
Sorry for all that pain, man.
Celebrating Starcraft since... a long time ago.
URLateral
Profile Joined October 2012
275 Posts
August 21 2013 01:39 GMT
#3
it would be really sad to see you go and im sorry to hear about everything
HeeroFX
Profile Blog Joined November 2010
United States2704 Posts
August 21 2013 01:46 GMT
#4
I think it is a smart move. It isn't easy to justify being a pro gamer. I am sad that one of my favorite players/people in esports that I got to know over the years, and cheered for is basically done with SC. But I am happy to know you are moving forward in life. Good luck with chemistry, I only took the gen chem 1 and 2 classes but man they were tough and time demanding. I do hope to hear more from you in esports world, and who knows maybe by the time you are done with med school (if you go that route,) esports will be big enough to justify having a team doctor on staff! Anyway, Sheth thanks for being such an awesome person and player and best of luck to you sir.
Valon
Profile Joined June 2011
United States329 Posts
August 21 2013 01:49 GMT
#5
Miss you Sheth. Hope your hands get better. Even if you never play professionally again. Hope to still see you commentate or on community shows and stream (if your hands are better) But best of luck in school. Thanks for the update.
Harajuku
Profile Blog Joined May 2013
150 Posts
Last Edited: 2013-08-21 01:53:47
August 21 2013 01:50 GMT
#6
Great blog. To me, you are a winner, Sheth. Good luck with whatever you'll decide to do.
blade55555
Profile Blog Joined March 2009
United States17423 Posts
August 21 2013 01:51 GMT
#7
I don't blame you for moving on. Honestly people do think that being a progamer is the luxurious awesome life that they want, but they really don't have a clue (I don't either other then playing).

While I have never been a pro and never had that stress, I just know from playing how frustrating that is. I can only imagine how much more frustrating it is when you play 2-3x more then I do (I play 3-4 hours a day at most) and still not do well at a LAN event. If you are on a team that does pay (EG/TL) it's still going to be stressful, you have to give exposure and do well at events. I really couldn't imagine the amount of stress/frustration they get, I imagine they get a lot more then I do (in terms of frustration, I know they are obviously way more stressed) because they are expected to do well.

If you don't, you get shit on by the community. You play a bad game and lose because of whatever reason? Nobody cares, you will still get shit on. I give you kudos for doing it for the past couple years (I don't think you have really played for the past year?).

Good luck on moving on and I imagine it's a lot less stressful, albeit a little more boring to .
When I think of something else, something will go here
Heyoka
Profile Blog Joined March 2008
Katowice25012 Posts
August 21 2013 01:55 GMT
#8
Best of luck with your new path Sheth, you'll do amazing things wherever you go. Being in esports is far from easy, you basically have to sacrifice everything else in your life, and it can be an incredibly unhealthy lifestyle. We'll always be here for you if you want to be involved again! In any capacity

Take care of yourself!
@RealHeyoka | ESL / DreamHack StarCraft Lead
Pontius Pirate
Profile Blog Joined August 2013
United States1557 Posts
August 21 2013 01:57 GMT
#9
I hope you decide to do a bit of casting in the future. I was always impressed with your casting.
"I had to close the door so my parents wouldn't judge me." - ZombieGrub during the ShitfaceTradeTV stream
bLzPostman
Profile Joined September 2011
New Zealand82 Posts
August 21 2013 01:59 GMT
#10
It was amazing to see you play and wish you all the best for college.
Raven068
Profile Blog Joined September 2011
United States90 Posts
August 21 2013 02:00 GMT
#11
I hope the surgeries go well. I just had surgery for a torn ACL and I can only imagine what you must be going through with that many on the horizon. That and the way you carried yourself always made you kind of a hero to me. Good luck with the surgeries and college! Hopefully, we can meet on the ladder in SC2 or another game some day! :D
www.youtube.com/Omega068
Jinxed
Profile Blog Joined May 2011
United States6450 Posts
August 21 2013 02:04 GMT
#12
Nothing but <3 Sheth. Hope you still hang around here. Was always hoping you would break that last barrier and get a victory you truly deserved. Best of luck in life though. Manner bear fighting!
LiquidDota Staff"LeLoup is a great name pls undo." -Liquid`Nazgul
Riffandroll
Profile Joined November 2011
Canada71 Posts
August 21 2013 02:09 GMT
#13
Umm, I'm sorry sir : "But it just wasn't enough. We can't all be winners. Games need losers too." doesn't apply to you. Your most definitely an awesome SC2 player and have accomplished a lot. Also, personality wise, your incredible for the community. Best of luck man for sure :-D
To forget one's purpose is the commonest form of stupidity. - Nietzsche
Archas
Profile Blog Joined July 2010
United States6531 Posts
Last Edited: 2013-08-21 02:10:38
August 21 2013 02:10 GMT
#14
On August 21 2013 10:34 Liquid`Sheth wrote:
We can't all be winners. Games need losers too.

You may think that you ended up a loser, but to all of your fans who enjoyed your games, your personality, your eternal smile, your commitment to excel... You're nothing if not a winner.
The room is ripe with the stench of bitches!
ProtoDemn
Profile Joined June 2012
Croatia11 Posts
August 21 2013 02:16 GMT
#15
Although it makes me a little sad to see you leaving progaming, I wish you the best of luck in college! I know how much time that takes up, trust me. But it is worth it in that it can help you find a stable job. However I also know its hard to completely give up something you love, so I'm hopeful I'll get to see your stream once again. Watching you streams were always one of my favorite ways to start my summer mornings
Hope to see you around more often bud
Fishriot
Profile Joined May 2010
United States621 Posts
August 21 2013 02:17 GMT
#16
Good luck yo, gotta do what you gotta do. <3
critique
Profile Blog Joined March 2011
United States135 Posts
August 21 2013 02:21 GMT
#17
It's been a lot of fun watching and rooting for you the last few years. Best of luck in college, and thanks for being the nicest guy in esports.
nooboon
Profile Blog Joined July 2011
2602 Posts
August 21 2013 02:22 GMT
#18
Sad to see you go sheth.
Alejandrisha
Profile Blog Joined July 2010
United States6565 Posts
August 21 2013 02:33 GMT
#19
good luck at school.
get rich or die mining
TL+ Member
DarkPlasmaBall
Profile Blog Joined March 2010
United States44186 Posts
August 21 2013 02:51 GMT
#20
Your health is more important than anything else.

And a good education will certainly open up more doors for you in the future!

Best of luck to you, Sheth
"There is nothing more satisfying than looking at a crowd of people and helping them get what I love." ~Day[9] Daily #100
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