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RTV #2: Why I Don't Have a Boyfriend

Blogs > TaraBabcock
Post a Reply
1 2 3 Next All
TaraBabcock
Profile Blog Joined April 2012
United States391 Posts
November 21 2012 12:46 GMT
#1
This week is all about why I don't have a boyfriend or practice standard relationship traditions!



ABOUT RTVs:
Random Topic Videos are short weekly-ish videos with a topic suggested by my viewers and fans! Post your ideas in the comments! They can be gaming/modeling-related, or they can be completely off topic!



Thanks in advance for your topic suggestions and viewership! Here's something a little different for my viewership community at TwitchTV and TL, as well as some more content for YouTube that all kinds of fans can enjoy!

You can find my SC2/gaming stream at tarababcock.tv on TwitchTV!

*
Supermodel Nerd Stream! twitch.tv/tarababcock
Azera
Profile Blog Joined December 2010
3800 Posts
November 21 2012 14:08 GMT
#2
Why do you have a poster of yourself (is it?) and 2 dogs getting it on in your room?
Check out some great music made by TLers - http://bit.ly/QXYhdb , by intrigue. http://bit.ly/RTjpOR , by ohsea.toc.
brian
Profile Blog Joined August 2004
United States9639 Posts
November 21 2012 14:41 GMT
#3
On November 21 2012 23:08 Azera wrote:
Why do you have a poster of yourself (is it?) and 2 dogs getting it on in your room?

You're missing a comma. Or something. Any kind of syntax indicating these are two separate things.
snexwang
Profile Joined April 2011
Australia224 Posts
November 21 2012 14:52 GMT
#4
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
HaXXspetten
Profile Blog Joined October 2009
Sweden15718 Posts
Last Edited: 2012-11-21 14:54:52
November 21 2012 14:52 GMT
#5
On November 21 2012 23:41 Gene wrote:
Show nested quote +
On November 21 2012 23:08 Azera wrote:
Why do you have a poster of yourself (is it?) and 2 dogs getting it on in your room?

You're missing a comma. Or something. Any kind of syntax indicating these are two separate things.

nono, please keep it the way it is, it's perfect

edit: seriously it's too good to have been accidental, hall of fame material right there, my god xD
MCDayC
Profile Joined March 2011
United Kingdom14464 Posts
November 21 2012 14:54 GMT
#6
LOL best first 2 comments ever.
VERY FRAGILE, LIKE A BABY PANDA EGG
TaraBabcock
Profile Blog Joined April 2012
United States391 Posts
November 21 2012 14:57 GMT
#7
Oh god. >.<

Haha!
Supermodel Nerd Stream! twitch.tv/tarababcock
meteorskunk
Profile Blog Joined August 2009
Canada546 Posts
November 21 2012 15:01 GMT
#8
On November 21 2012 23:08 Azera wrote:
Why do you have a poster of yourself (is it?) and 2 dogs getting it on in your room?


because taras awesome and because dogs are awesome and then a yellow dog getting it on with a pink dog is super awesome!!

I enjoyed the video. Open relationships are a very interesting idea. If you can accept your partner having sex with someone else, that's some good, accepting, uncontrolling love, non? OH but jealousy is so strong.

But what about... like if say one person is good for sex, but then the other person is good for emotional support? And then so the person who is good at supporting his/her partner emotionally has to stay around and be friends all the while knowing that their attraction to the friendship has hints of sexuality??

Girl Blog Credentials: Comfortable talking to some women. Tried the sex once
TaraBabcock
Profile Blog Joined April 2012
United States391 Posts
November 21 2012 15:12 GMT
#9
On November 22 2012 00:01 meteorskunk wrote:
Show nested quote +
On November 21 2012 23:08 Azera wrote:
Why do you have a poster of yourself (is it?) and 2 dogs getting it on in your room?


because taras awesome and because dogs are awesome and then a yellow dog getting it on with a pink dog is super awesome!!

I enjoyed the video. Open relationships are a very interesting idea. If you can accept your partner having sex with someone else, that's some good, accepting, uncontrolling love, non? OH but jealousy is so strong.

But what about... like if say one person is good for sex, but then the other person is good for emotional support? And then so the person who is good at supporting his/her partner emotionally has to stay around and be friends all the while knowing that their attraction to the friendship has hints of sexuality??



Thanks!

In regards to your last question, my answer is yes, just like a mother would be there for her child, or one of your guy friends would support you knowing that you have sex with a girlfriend. It's like I have a bunch of friends, and a few are good for filling that sexual void as an added benefit.

It's the same concept as having a girl who I love to gossip with and shop with, but then guy friends that are good for other things like playing video games.

I feel you are seeing it still as a committed relationship where one man is supporting me financially and is, for all intensive purposes, "in love" with me and I am just leading him on and sleeping with someone else, and it's not like that. I am very open with people and feel communication is king in any relationship, and hopefully that helps minimize any issues I have with guy friends who have feelings for me that I am not sleeping with.

Hopefully that makes sense!
Supermodel Nerd Stream! twitch.tv/tarababcock
meteorskunk
Profile Blog Joined August 2009
Canada546 Posts
November 21 2012 15:16 GMT
#10
On November 22 2012 00:12 TaraBabcock wrote:
Show nested quote +
On November 22 2012 00:01 meteorskunk wrote:
On November 21 2012 23:08 Azera wrote:
Why do you have a poster of yourself (is it?) and 2 dogs getting it on in your room?


because taras awesome and because dogs are awesome and then a yellow dog getting it on with a pink dog is super awesome!!

I enjoyed the video. Open relationships are a very interesting idea. If you can accept your partner having sex with someone else, that's some good, accepting, uncontrolling love, non? OH but jealousy is so strong.

But what about... like if say one person is good for sex, but then the other person is good for emotional support? And then so the person who is good at supporting his/her partner emotionally has to stay around and be friends all the while knowing that their attraction to the friendship has hints of sexuality??



Thanks!

In regards to your last question, my answer is yes, just like a mother would be there for her child, or one of your guy friends would support you knowing that you have sex with a girlfriend. It's like I have a bunch of friends, and a few are good for filling that sexual void as an added benefit.

It's the same concept as having a girl who I love to gossip with and shop with, but then guy friends that are good for other things like playing video games.

I feel you are seeing it still as a committed relationship where one man is supporting me financially and is, for all intensive purposes, "in love" with me and I am just leading him on and sleeping with someone else, and it's not like that. I am very open with people and feel communication is king in any relationship, and hopefully that helps minimize any issues I have with guy friends who have feelings for me that I am not sleeping with.

Hopefully that makes sense!


sure does. thanks for the quick response. Your thoughts will help me out.
Girl Blog Credentials: Comfortable talking to some women. Tried the sex once
deathly rat
Profile Blog Joined October 2010
United Kingdom911 Posts
Last Edited: 2012-11-21 15:24:12
November 21 2012 15:21 GMT
#11
Are you aware that relationships are something that you build together, not something that happens when you meet your perfect match? That goes for sex as well.

Nothing wrong with friends with benefits, but you're kidding yourself if you think that is better than being in a loving relationship.
No logo (logo)
TaraBabcock
Profile Blog Joined April 2012
United States391 Posts
November 21 2012 15:28 GMT
#12
On November 22 2012 00:21 deathly rat wrote:
Are you aware that relationships are something that you build together, not something that happens when you meet your perfect match? That goes for sex as well.

Nothing wrong with friends with benefits, but it you're kidding yourself if you think that is better than being in a loving relationship.


That's what I am saying, I build these strong relationships over time with good friends. No title or piece of paper makes that happen, nor does the exclusivity, which are the only differences.

I understand that it's easy to equate what I am saying to the standard "friends with benefits" that is more of a shallow "one night stand" kind of relationship, and that's not what I have.

I have been best friends with my roommate for 7 years without secrets, restrictions, rules, and other unimportant traditions, and I would do absolutely anything for him. My newer FWBs are like your new dating scenarios, they are still growing into the potential strong friendship partnerships you speak of.

There's really no difference, other than a few logical tweaks that, IMO, make a relationship even stronger.
Supermodel Nerd Stream! twitch.tv/tarababcock
brian
Profile Blog Joined August 2004
United States9639 Posts
November 21 2012 16:10 GMT
#13
I find your blogs surprisingly endearing.
divito
Profile Blog Joined January 2011
Canada1213 Posts
Last Edited: 2012-11-21 16:24:57
November 21 2012 16:23 GMT
#14
I think this is the first time I've ever heard someone say being non-committal is more logical.

The only issue I take with such a stance is: practicing casual sexual relationships doesn't prepare you for the day you finally decide you've found someone that meets all your needs and you finally need no one else. I suppose it would beg the question, in that do you fully answer every question one of your trusted fuck buddies asks of you?

If feelings ever start to shift with these friends, I'm not sure how they make the next step of fully trusting you, or you them. You've both started and will maintain a track record of not being "tied down" and all the other negative spins you placed on traditional relationships.

If you both have this attitude of not conforming with the typical relationship, and this "I'll do what I want, when I want to, and answer to no one," I really don't see where true trust can factor in there when you're both putting yourself above your relationship.
Skype: divito7
TaraBabcock
Profile Blog Joined April 2012
United States391 Posts
November 21 2012 16:55 GMT
#15
On November 22 2012 01:23 divito wrote:
I think this is the first time I've ever heard someone say being non-committal is more logical.

The only issue I take with such a stance is: practicing casual sexual relationships doesn't prepare you for the day you finally decide you've found someone that meets all your needs and you finally need no one else. I suppose it would beg the question, in that do you fully answer every question one of your trusted fuck buddies asks of you?

If feelings ever start to shift with these friends, I'm not sure how they make the next step of fully trusting you, or you them. You've both started and will maintain a track record of not being "tied down" and all the other negative spins you placed on traditional relationships.

If you both have this attitude of not conforming with the typical relationship, and this "I'll do what I want, when I want to, and answer to no one," I really don't see where true trust can factor in there when you're both putting yourself above your relationship.


Like I said, finding "one person forever" to have sex with is illogical and against our biological make-up.

Aside from that one difference, I have already found my perfect person, and I spend all day every day with him pretty much, he's like my other half. I will not be getting married or changing my lifestyle. Ever.

I don't agree that you build trust by making huge compromises. The fact that my roommate and I agree with each other on what is important and can be ourselves fully while sharing our lives together as individuals makes us much stronger than with the traditional illogical rules associated with the religion-based marriage.

Most men lie to their wives about looking at other girls, porn, liking colleagues, etc., and end up losing that sexual desire, IMO big chunk of what it is to be full content in a relationship, and it withers.

With that said, I am well aware it's hard to understand my ideas. I have thought about them for year, and a lot. Most people just grow up being taught things. I grew up in a house where I was encouraged to figure out what want.

Supermodel Nerd Stream! twitch.tv/tarababcock
TaraBabcock
Profile Blog Joined April 2012
United States391 Posts
November 21 2012 17:13 GMT
#16
With all of the arguments here, I just want to say that I completely respect others' very personal prerogatives and beliefs on this topic. I am very confident and happy with mine as well, but I enjoy discussing things and exploring psychology and sociology's role in how people think.

Oh, and thanks for watching and posting!
Supermodel Nerd Stream! twitch.tv/tarababcock
brian
Profile Blog Joined August 2004
United States9639 Posts
Last Edited: 2012-11-21 17:36:23
November 21 2012 17:30 GMT
#17
What I read out of his comment is the idea that I'd be afraid one day what I want would change. For you, or for him.

I mean hell, the entire argument here is that what we want is at best a moving target.
EG.lectR
Profile Blog Joined September 2010
United States617 Posts
November 21 2012 20:30 GMT
#18
I'm curious...what happens when you're 40 and losing your attractiveness, struggling to find your friends with benefits, and have now a list of sexual partners who, because you so greatly feared words like tradition or standard, are now married and want to distance themselves with someone [like yourself] who views sex as a "make it or break it" and casual part of a relationship? I would assume those emotions that you tried to hide, and viewed as distinct from your sexual encounters, would return to remind you that you cannot separate yourself from your experiences. They define you, and sexual experiences are not distinct from this.

I have no interest in going into this topic deeply due to the sheer nature that I do not know you nor do I feel an online forum is the best platform for this type of discussion, but your definitions and worldview on this subject are contradictory and are not without emotion. The fact that you reference words like tradition and standard and relate them to a negative tone makes me question your approach's clarity.

Relationships take work. Real relationships are not built on sex because sex is fleeting. Real relationships acknowledge commitment and hard work because of the fact that we are human. We make mistakes...we are wrong many times...and if you are thinking that marriage is simply a piece of paper, that speaks to your lack of self-control and commitment to another person. If you can't commit to "a piece of paper," then doesn't that say, "Oh...I like you or maybe I love you, but not enough to make it official. Not enough to bind myself to you"? That's not love nor is it really even like then. That's you trying to escape because you don't like restraints or pressure upon your life. You're saying that point, "My needs need to be met before yours."

When you're at that point, you want a "carefree" life...ones which do not exist on this earth. When you engage in the mindset that you have, it's not even a moral issue, it's a common sense issue.
@colindeshong
Rathwirt
Profile Joined January 2011
United States42 Posts
Last Edited: 2012-11-21 21:00:32
November 21 2012 20:59 GMT
#19
As a fellow poly person, (though I am married) I always love seeing other people endorse that lifestyle. Go you/us!
Sinensis
Profile Blog Joined April 2009
United States2513 Posts
November 21 2012 22:01 GMT
#20
You should do your next random topic video about why nerd guys turn you on. Or your favorite outfits while laddering; this could spawn an entire mini-series of topics about various outfits for various activities. Those are the best two I could think of that fit in with your theme of pandering to sex for publicity.
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