• Log InLog In
  • Register
Liquid`
Team Liquid Liquipedia
EDT 15:55
CEST 21:55
KST 04:55
  • Home
  • Forum
  • Calendar
  • Streams
  • Liquipedia
  • Features
  • Store
  • EPT
  • TL+
  • StarCraft 2
  • Brood War
  • Smash
  • Heroes
  • Counter-Strike
  • Overwatch
  • Liquibet
  • Fantasy StarCraft
  • TLPD
  • StarCraft 2
  • Brood War
  • Blogs
Forum Sidebar
Events/Features
News
Featured News
Team Liquid Map Contest #22: Results and Winners7Code S Season 2 (2026): RO4 and Finals Preview12TL.net Map Contest #22 - Voting & Ladder Map Selection7Code S Season 2 (2026) - RO8 Preview5[ASL21] Finals Preview: Two Legacies21
Community News
Douyu Cup 2026: $20,000 Legends Event (June 26-28)8[BSL22] Non-Korean Championship from 13 to 28 June4Weekly Cups (May 25-31): Clem doubles, 2v2 circuit heads toward finale0StarCraft II 5.0.16 PTR Patch Notes may 26th156Weekly Cups (May 18-24): MaxPax wins doubles0
StarCraft 2
General
Oliveira Would Have Returned If EWC Continued Team Liquid Map Contest #22: Results and Winners RSL S6 finale at Blizzcon High level ptr replays? where can I find them? StarCraft II 5.0.16 PTR Patch Notes may 26th
Tourneys
Douyu Cup 2026: $20,000 Legends Event (June 26-28) Maestros of The Game 2 announcement and schedule ! Sparkling Tuna Cup - Weekly Open Tournament Sea Duckling Open (Global, Bronze-Diamond) GSL Code S Season 2 (2026)
Strategy
[G] Having the right mentality to improve
Custom Maps
[D]RTS in all its shapes and glory <3
External Content
Mutation # 530 One For All The PondCast: SC2 News & Results Mutation # 529 Opportunities Unleashed Mutation # 528 Infection Detected
Brood War
General
BW General Discussion BGH Auto Balance -> http://bghmmr.eu/ vespene.gg — BW replays in browser Quality of life changes in BW that you will like ? [BSL22] Non-Korean Championship from 13 to 28 June
Tourneys
[Megathread] Daily Proleagues [ASL21] Grand Finals [BSL22] Grand Finals - Sunday 21:00 CEST Escore Tournament StarCraft Season 2
Strategy
Creating a full chart of Zerg builds Relatively freeroll strategies Why doesn't anyone use restoration? Any training maps people recommend?
Other Games
General Games
Stormgate/Frost Giant Megathread Nintendo Switch Thread PC Games Sales Thread ZeroSpace Megathread Summer Games Done Quick 2026!
Dota 2
Looking for a Dota Mentor Official 'what is Dota anymore' discussion
League of Legends
Heroes of the Storm
Simple Questions, Simple Answers Heroes of the Storm 2.0
Hearthstone
Deck construction bug Heroes of StarCraft mini-set
TL Mafia
Vanilla Mini Mafia
Community
General
US Politics Mega-thread Canadian Politics Mega-thread Russo-Ukrainian War Thread Trading/Investing Thread Things Aren’t Peaceful in Palestine
Fan Clubs
The HerO Fan Club! The herO Fan Club!
Media & Entertainment
Movie Discussion! [Req][Books] Good Fantasy/SciFi books [TV/BOOK] *SPOILERS* Game of Thrones Discussion [Manga] One Piece
Sports
2024 - 2026 Football Thread Formula 1 Discussion Cricket [SPORT] TeamLiquid Health and Fitness Initiative For 2023 NBA General Discussion
World Cup 2022
Tech Support
Computer Build, Upgrade & Buying Resource Thread Facing Challenges in Mobile App Development
TL Community
The Automated Ban List
Blogs
Does Workplace Frustration D…
TrAiDoS
An Exploration of th…
waywardstrategy
I'm an arrogant trash talke…
FlaShFTW
Gauntlet SC2: A Retrospectiv…
Ctone23
Why RTS gamers make better f…
gosubay
Customize Sidebar...

Website Feedback

Closed Threads



Active: 9656 users

[Fiction] Isn't Everybody

Blogs > Shady Sands
Post a Reply
Shady Sands
Profile Blog Joined June 2012
United States4021 Posts
Last Edited: 2012-08-25 14:16:42
August 25 2012 14:15 GMT
#1
I met Sal on the Blue Line, coming back in.

Course, I'd known her for a while. She was the quiet, studious Chinese girl who always sat in the front row. She probably didn't know me though, given that I was the dude who slept in the back.

Anyhow, there I was, trying my best to stay awake and not miss my stop, when I saw her stumble aboard at the Western stop.

She sat across from me and didn't notice. Then she stood up and began to yell.

I wasn't sure what she was yelling about. I looked around to see if she had a friend with her who could take of her.

Nope.

When I'd asked my first girlfriend out on my first date, I'd started the phone call by asking if she was alone.

Isn't everybody, was her answer. Charlene was amazing. Probably spoiled me.

But back to Sal. She lasted two stops before the attendant escorted her off the train car. I followed.

I still don't remember why. Maybe I thought I could be a gentleman?

Nah, who am I kidding.

We walked for two blocks east, towards the lake. She was alternating between leaning against me and doing pirouettes in her heels.

I had to catch her once or twice. Okay, maybe a little more than once or twice. We were young and drunk. Or she was. I don't really remember.

I asked her where she lived.

"Morgan Towers," she blurted into my ear. She was leaning against me now. I could smell all the cosmopolitans she'd had.

I looked towards the lake. A half-circular cylinder stretching up to the sky, soft blue glow. "Like an erect..." I turned around. Now she was giggling like crazy.

Sometime during all of this, it had begun to rain. I pulled her close. Her striped shirt under the black denim jacket was now semitransparent. "Guess we'll just have to do laundry when I get home." More giggling.

I should probably back up a bit and tell you how she looked. She was five foot eight, 32B-24-34, and probably weighed about one hundred pounds dripping wet. Oh, and she had big eyes and ringlets that looked like they belonged on a 1940s movie star.

In short, she was way out of my league. But alcohol is man's best friend, I guess.

I know her measurements, because I ended up doing the laundry.

I found the opened bottle on the kitchen counter the next morning. It was orange, plastic, and she started crying when she saw me looking at it. AZT, anti-retrovirals.

Thank God I kept a condom in my wallet.

Oh shit.

I felt around my pockets, felt the sharp edge of the foil packet. It was still there.

Now we're sitting in bed, and I'm using her laptop to type this, and I'm not talking to her, and she's not talking to me.

We're watching a dating show. The host asks one of the contestants if she's ever kept a secret from her boyfriend. I look at Sal. Sal looks back at me. I say fuck it, and kiss her again.

**
Что?
Yurie
Profile Blog Joined August 2010
12100 Posts
Last Edited: 2012-08-25 16:53:52
August 25 2012 16:50 GMT
#2
The story felt a bit too basic in description and tension for me. I could follow the plot and abstractly see the mental situation of the people involved, I simply don't care about the characters.

The only thing that struck me after reading it, isn't that illegal? No emotional impact. It is a different way to look at the topic at hand though, very different from what I would do in a similar situation.

I liked the use of "Course", made it feel like the main character was somebody that would flunk high school from just using one word.
Aerisky
Profile Blog Joined May 2012
United States12129 Posts
August 25 2012 22:24 GMT
#3
I thought it was alright. It's one of the shortfalls of writing a short short story, for sure. Pretty difficult to get your audience vested in a short story's characters if it's that short and posted on the Internet. Even shorter O. Henry-length stories will break the audience's attention span unless it's fantastic, so there's not too much you can do in terms of character development. What's more important is that it captures your attention and makes you wonder about those two people (it didn't for you so that's unfortunate I guess ). Just my two cents.
Jim while Johnny had had had had had had had; had had had had the better effect on the teacher.
Shady Sands
Profile Blog Joined June 2012
United States4021 Posts
Last Edited: 2012-08-27 17:09:39
August 27 2012 17:08 GMT
#4
On August 26 2012 07:24 Aerisky wrote:
I thought it was alright. It's one of the shortfalls of writing a short short story, for sure. Pretty difficult to get your audience vested in a short story's characters if it's that short and posted on the Internet. Even shorter O. Henry-length stories will break the audience's attention span unless it's fantastic, so there's not too much you can do in terms of character development. What's more important is that it captures your attention and makes you wonder about those two people (it didn't for you so that's unfortunate I guess ). Just my two cents.


Heh--exactly the case. I keep thinking that there has to be a balance, or maybe one should just link all these first person stories together, make it a memoir of sorts. Enough words on paper from a FPOV, and eventually we will start caring about the first person narrator.

EDIT: Even if everyone in the story is completely undeserving of our sympathy (e.g. The Great Gatsby.)
Что?
Please log in or register to reply.
Live Events Refresh
BSL22 NKC (BSL vs China)
19:00
Group Stage - Day 2
Jaystar vs Dewalt
eOnzErG vs TerrOr
XuanXuan vs Bonyth
Mihu vs Dewalt
Messiah vs Jaystar
eOnzErG vs Bonyth
TerrOr vs Dewalt
LiquipediaDiscussion
uThermal 2v2 Circuit
15:00
Season Finals: Group Stage 2
uThermal3572
RotterdaM1085
TaKeTV 587
mouzHeroMarine480
IndyStarCraft 265
SteadfastSC132
BRAT_OK 130
LamboSC279
SHIN 77
sc2solar38
Shameless20
Classic15
SpiritSC213
LiquipediaDiscussion
[ Submit Event ]
Live Streams
Refresh
StarCraft 2
uThermal 3572
RotterdaM 1085
mouzHeroMarine 480
IndyStarCraft 265
SteadfastSC 132
BRAT_OK 130
LamboSC2 79
SHIN 77
ProTech71
sc2solar 38
Railgan 21
Classic 15
SpiritSC2 13
CosmosSc2 12
JuggernautJason11
StarCraft: Brood War
Britney 14494
Calm 2846
Mini 208
ZZZero.O 185
ggaemo 79
Sea.KH 54
Soulkey 54
Dewaltoss 50
Shine 18
Rock 17
Dota 2
XaKoH 432
League of Legends
Doublelift5
Counter-Strike
fl0m9514
zeus690
byalli542
Super Smash Bros
Mew2King94
Heroes of the Storm
Khaldor271
MindelVK9
Other Games
gofns20570
Grubby3239
summit1g2415
mouzStarbuck323
UpATreeSC48
Tefel16
OptimusSC24
Organizations
Other Games
EGCTV1468
gamesdonequick829
BasetradeTV180
StarCraft 2
Blizzard YouTube
StarCraft: Brood War
BSLTrovo
[ Show 12 non-featured ]
StarCraft 2
• Reevou 5
• AfreecaTV YouTube
• intothetv
• Kozan
• IndyKCrew
• LaughNgamezSOOP
• Migwel
• sooper7s
StarCraft: Brood War
• BSLYoutube
• STPLYoutube
• ZZZeroYoutube
Other Games
• Shiphtur161
Upcoming Events
Wardi Open
15h 5m
OSC
1d 4h
Replay Cast
2 days
The PondCast
3 days
Replay Cast
4 days
OSC
4 days
CranKy Ducklings
4 days
BSL22 NKC (BSL vs China)
5 days
XuanXuan vs Jaystar
Mihu vs Messiah
eOnzErG vs Dewalt
Bonyth vs Jaystar
TerrOr vs Messiah
XuanXuan vs Mihu
eOnzErG vs Jaystar
BSL22 NKC (BSL vs China)
6 days
Dewalt vs Messiah
Bonyth vs Mihu
TerrOr vs XuanXuan
eOnzErG vs Messiah
Jaystar vs Mihu
Dewalt vs XuanXuan
Bonyth vs TerrOr
Liquipedia Results

Completed

Acropolis #4 - GSB
2026 GSL S2
Heroes Pulsing #1

Ongoing

IPSL Spring 2026
KCM Race Survival 2026 Season 2
Acropolis #4
CSCL: Masked Kings S4
YSL S3
BSL 22 Non-Korean Championship
SCTL 2026 Spring
Maestros of the Game 2
WardiTV Spring 2026
uThermal 2v2 2026 Main Event
Murky Cup 2026
Heroes Pulsing #2
IEM Cologne Major 2026
Stake Ranked Episode 2
CS Asia Championships 2026
Asian Champions League 2026
IEM Atlanta 2026
PGL Astana 2026
BLAST Rivals Spring 2026
IEM Rio 2026
PGL Bucharest 2026
Stake Ranked Episode 1

Upcoming

CSLAN 4
Blizzard Classic Cup 2026
Kung Fu Cup 2026 Grand Finals
RSL Revival: Season 6
CranK Gathers Season 4: BW vs SC2 Team League
HSC XXIX
Douyu Cup 2026
Heroes Pulsing #3
BLAST Open Fall 2026
Esports World Cup 2026
BLAST Bounty Summer 2026
BLAST Bounty Summer Qual
Stake Ranked Episode 3
XSE Pro League 2026
TLPD

1. ByuN
2. TY
3. Dark
4. Solar
5. Stats
6. Nerchio
7. sOs
8. soO
9. INnoVation
10. Elazer
1. Rain
2. Flash
3. EffOrt
4. Last
5. Bisu
6. Soulkey
7. Mini
8. Sharp
Sidebar Settings...

Advertising | Privacy Policy | Terms Of Use | Contact Us

Original banner artwork: Jim Warren
The contents of this webpage are copyright © 2026 TLnet. All Rights Reserved.