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On October 26 2011 06:59 Chef wrote:This is a very superficial method. It's good that you're going to start taking care of yourself and trying things, but I also sense a lot of pitfalls with your mindset. You are really trying to fulfill a certain ideal and I think that's unhealthy. Just in the tone of your post, this ingenuous, overly-decisive machismo... It lacks the internal motivation necessary for lasting and fulfilling change. IM GONNA GO TO PARTY AND BE A COOL GUY AND ASK THAT GIRL OUT BLERP BLERP. Wow is your life a b-movie comedy? Good that you've decided to stop being a worthless slob, but be wary of the short-term value external motivators give. Maybe along the way with this shamelessly idealistic persona you will discover some lasting internal motivators and move healthily into the next stage of your life. Maybe you were a little drunk while writing this, or maybe you are naive to the disappointment that comes from adopting a prescribed personality. Maybe you're actually this shallow and it really makes sense to you. gl gl whatever it is. Don't go back to being worthless if things don't go exactly as you hope, just try more things and learn a little about life. PSPS: Brood War isn't a waste of time  Don't knock it just because you are trying to do something new. Hobbies make people interesting.
Well I think the OP's point is not about trying to be popular or cool, but that it helps if you break your isolation. What the OP listed were just some examples that helped him. In times of depression you naturally seek safety and isolation, and that could cause a downward spiral that makes things worse.
However, there is a pitfall here. People who are truly medically depressed will not benefit from some guy just telling them to start having fun. The whole problem is that they physically cannot experience much pleasure or happiness at all. Those people should consult psychiatrists as getting outside and doing social activities simply will not help without the help of anti-depressants.
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The mystery remains in what causes it, but it is completely true that if at some point, things just click, you open your eyes and look around you and realize there are other, better options and you're letting them pass over you like a fool, that's how depression is really broken.
Personally I think depression is actually an episode of broken philosophy, perhaps a very long episode, and your mind can only work with what you've experienced up to that point to come to new conclusions which cause your philosophy to change. You just have to absorb whatever you will, around you, and hope that eventually things line up and you get the bigger picture, accept some more workable premises for life only because you've come to learn that they are real by your own judgement, from your own limitted perspective. It helps if you look for it, but it's when your disfunctional premises include willfull ignorance of any kind that you have the longest road ahead of you. Still, hopefully even a slowly expanding frame of mind will eventually come upon an epiphany, one which accellerates your growth, if only slightly, leading eventually to another.
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On October 26 2011 07:04 Slow Motion wrote:Show nested quote +On October 26 2011 06:59 Chef wrote:This is a very superficial method. It's good that you're going to start taking care of yourself and trying things, but I also sense a lot of pitfalls with your mindset. You are really trying to fulfill a certain ideal and I think that's unhealthy. Just in the tone of your post, this ingenuous, overly-decisive machismo... It lacks the internal motivation necessary for lasting and fulfilling change. IM GONNA GO TO PARTY AND BE A COOL GUY AND ASK THAT GIRL OUT BLERP BLERP. Wow is your life a b-movie comedy? Good that you've decided to stop being a worthless slob, but be wary of the short-term value external motivators give. Maybe along the way with this shamelessly idealistic persona you will discover some lasting internal motivators and move healthily into the next stage of your life. Maybe you were a little drunk while writing this, or maybe you are naive to the disappointment that comes from adopting a prescribed personality. Maybe you're actually this shallow and it really makes sense to you. gl gl whatever it is. Don't go back to being worthless if things don't go exactly as you hope, just try more things and learn a little about life. PSPS: Brood War isn't a waste of time Don't knock it just because you are trying to do something new. Hobbies make people interesting. Well I think the OP's point is not about trying to be popular or cool, but that it helps if you break your isolation. What the OP listed were just some examples that helped him. In times of depression you naturally seek safety and isolation, and that could cause a downward spiral that makes things worse. However, there is a pitfall here. People who are truly medically depressed will not benefit from some guy just telling them to start having fun. The whole problem is that they physically cannot experience much pleasure or happiness at all. Those people should consult psychiatrists as getting outside and doing social activities simply will not help without the help of anti-depressants.
I think depression as a scientific subject is largely unsolved. However what I sense in the OP is that he just replacing one method of hiding with another. 'No one will judge me if I hide in my dark room and go on the internet anonymously' -> 'No one can judge me because it's not really me, it's a personality I'm embodying' The fear of being judged, of being discovered for who you are and if you'll be rejected or accepted is never resolved. To me it is avoiding a large issue that people who isolate themselves deal with (unnecessarily). Be a little braver and don't put on a big show. To an extent we all have to play little acts throughout life, but the less you have to act the more satisfied you will be. Otherwise you get these weird people who ten years later suddenly admit 'no, I wasn't really like that. the REAL me I kept hidden from everyone' ok super dramaman. I dislike those people... So I ask why is going to dinner and seeing your friend so much more valuable than other hobbies? See your friends, maintain your connections, be real, good, but there is satisfaction from other things in life that you shouldn't reject. If you just go out with friends because this is what society deems you should be doing, then you are still going to end up depressed and unfulfilled. This is what I mean... It's an avoidance of problems even if it is socially acceptable/encouraged. It makes no sense to value drinking in a bar more than playing games.
Pills could make you happy, but to people who have to make decisions about whether or not they take drugs to improve their mood, that's not always a satisfying solution. Actually it seems like just another diversion from the real problems.
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Damn, I wish I had the chance to do nothing but play computer games. It sucks having to do other things in life. Pretty annoying
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On October 26 2011 07:04 Slow Motion wrote:Show nested quote +On October 26 2011 06:59 Chef wrote:This is a very superficial method. It's good that you're going to start taking care of yourself and trying things, but I also sense a lot of pitfalls with your mindset. You are really trying to fulfill a certain ideal and I think that's unhealthy. Just in the tone of your post, this ingenuous, overly-decisive machismo... It lacks the internal motivation necessary for lasting and fulfilling change. IM GONNA GO TO PARTY AND BE A COOL GUY AND ASK THAT GIRL OUT BLERP BLERP. Wow is your life a b-movie comedy? Good that you've decided to stop being a worthless slob, but be wary of the short-term value external motivators give. Maybe along the way with this shamelessly idealistic persona you will discover some lasting internal motivators and move healthily into the next stage of your life. Maybe you were a little drunk while writing this, or maybe you are naive to the disappointment that comes from adopting a prescribed personality. Maybe you're actually this shallow and it really makes sense to you. gl gl whatever it is. Don't go back to being worthless if things don't go exactly as you hope, just try more things and learn a little about life. PSPS: Brood War isn't a waste of time Don't knock it just because you are trying to do something new. Hobbies make people interesting. Well I think the OP's point is not about trying to be popular or cool, but that it helps if you break your isolation. What the OP listed were just some examples that helped him. In times of depression you naturally seek safety and isolation, and that could cause a downward spiral that makes things worse. However, there is a pitfall here. People who are truly medically depressed will not benefit from some guy just telling them to start having fun. The whole problem is that they physically cannot experience much pleasure or happiness at all. Those people should consult psychiatrists as getting outside and doing social activities simply will not help without the help of anti-depressants.
Emotional impulses and neuro-chemicals are the chicken and the egg. Your neurons fire off and your glands start pumping chemicals, of course, in response to stimuli (external or internal), and who is to say that it is not a learned process? To say furthermore that it cannot be unlearned, or that you'd be better off living the rest of your life with a growing drug dependency and a host of side-effects, is in my opinion giving up too easily on a possible better answer, and on someone else's behalf. I see it as a negative influence.
To automatically discount the claim of a vitim of depression that he's ready to experience genuine, lasting happiness without the need of your prescribed physical treatment, just because you or no one you know has ever had such an experience, is really psychology at its worst. There is always an element of individual discovery that has to be respected, or else you're just an emotional dictator, and that likely will not help anyone.
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I think there are a lot of misconceptions about depression and anti-depressants here.
I never advocated someone randomly taking anti-depressants. In fact I made it clear they should seek medical professionals who may or may not prescribe anti-depressant after they evaluate and talk to you.
Anti-depressants aren't like morphine in that they do not produce pleasure. What they do is restore the natural balance of serotonin levels and give you more energy back. They help with physical symptoms of depression such as panic attacks, night sweats, lack of appetite, abnormal tiredness and lack of energy, insomnia, etc. Anti-depressants are not addictive. Actually a major problem is some people tend to stop taking them too early or take them infrequently.
Also, there is a confusion about what depression is. The depression I'm talking about is the kind that manifests in actual physical symptoms. Therapy may reduce these symptoms but it is very difficult to rely on that alone. I'm not talking about someone in a stage of life where he's just bored or unmotivated but still can have lots of fun with friends. By definition people with moderate to serious depression find it difficult to experience happiness whatever they do.
I'm not trying to say what everyone should do if they are depressed besides go see a professional. It doesn't hurt to talk to somebody and you might find it helps a lot.
This is a link that might help explain some basic things:
http://www.nimh.nih.gov/health/publications/depression/complete-index.shtml
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5/5
Good for you. It's always nice when you have these epiphanies on what you really want to do and you start DOING something after a long time of not doing anything. Though I must give similar advice as Chef - start doing something that'll change life long term as well. Always wanted to master the guitar? Want to be awesome at drawing? Maybe it's something completely different, but no matter what it is - if it's something you can keep to for a long time ahead, go for it. 
I know that my own immediate problem is to clean my own room. ^^ Other than that and having no cash (which is something I cannot fix right now without giving up school which I refuse to do ^^'), I'm livin' the dream (sort of)! I'm happy were I am in life and the future is looking extremely bright.
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hey hey, instead of how depression works, and all... i love psychology and if i could i'd double major in it, but the idea of the post was to show that maybe just changing the subtle things in your life, such as cleaning up a space, selling old things you have, might give you an oppertunnity to just change how your life is currently going
many people get stuck in a "rut" so to speak,a nd those who was clinically depressed and being, or should be- clinically treated for it. but im talking about that depression that jsut makes the world seem like a gray rather then a dark and desolate place.
so otherwise, just look to what you can do to change, and i know that sounds cliche, but like... just go clean a closet or something, it helped me feel better and it made me want to keep the lights on in most of my rooms, they're CLEAN and i like seeing that, it makes me feel happy.
booze-cruising with friends also makes me feel happy and we have that planned, just... look around ya for something
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On October 26 2011 08:39 Dee-Kej wrote:+ Show Spoiler +5/5 Good for you. It's always nice when you have these epiphanies on what you really want to do and you start DOING something after a long time of not doing anything. Though I must give similar advice as Chef - start doing something that'll change life long term as well. Always wanted to master the guitar? Want to be awesome at drawing? Maybe it's something completely different, but no matter what it is - if it's something you can keep to for a long time ahead, go for it. I know that my own immediate problem is to clean my own room. ^^ Other than that and having no cash (which is something I cannot fix right now without giving up school which I refuse to do ^^'), I'm livin' the dream (sort of)! I'm happy were I am in life and the future is looking extremely bright.
the funny thing is, is that I play guitar and i recently sold some of my older ones so that I can have some money, sure money cant buy me love or happiness, but having it available for when i need it sure helps.
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On October 26 2011 08:39 Metalreflux wrote:
hey hey, instead of how depression works, and all... i love psychology and if i could i'd double major in it, but the idea of the post was to show that maybe just changing the subtle things in your life, such as cleaning up a space, selling old things you have, might give you an oppertunnity to just change how your life is currently going
many people get stuck in a "rut" so to speak,a nd those who was clinically depressed and being, or should be- clinically treated for it. but im talking about that depression that jsut makes the world seem like a gray rather then a dark and desolate place.
so otherwise, just look to what you can do to change, and i know that sounds cliche, but like... just go clean a closet or something, it helped me feel better and it made me want to keep the lights on in most of my rooms, they're CLEAN and i like seeing that, it makes me feel happy.
booze-cruising with friends also makes me feel happy and we have that planned, just... look around ya for something
Yeah you are right and I never disagreed with you that those things help a lot and people should try to do them. I was only pointing out that simply thinking about doing all that stuff may be difficult for some suffering from depression.
And even while doing those things it's good to talk to a psychiatrist/therapist. I mean I don't know Rokit5 and all but reading his post makes me think he would benefit from talking to a therapist. I'm not interested in telling him what to do cause I don't know a thing about him, but there are people out there who can listen to him and give him good advice (and maybe take a blood test to make sure this isn't just a thyroid problem or something).
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On October 26 2011 07:24 Chef wrote:Show nested quote +On October 26 2011 07:04 Slow Motion wrote:On October 26 2011 06:59 Chef wrote:This is a very superficial method. It's good that you're going to start taking care of yourself and trying things, but I also sense a lot of pitfalls with your mindset. You are really trying to fulfill a certain ideal and I think that's unhealthy. Just in the tone of your post, this ingenuous, overly-decisive machismo... It lacks the internal motivation necessary for lasting and fulfilling change. IM GONNA GO TO PARTY AND BE A COOL GUY AND ASK THAT GIRL OUT BLERP BLERP. Wow is your life a b-movie comedy? Good that you've decided to stop being a worthless slob, but be wary of the short-term value external motivators give. Maybe along the way with this shamelessly idealistic persona you will discover some lasting internal motivators and move healthily into the next stage of your life. Maybe you were a little drunk while writing this, or maybe you are naive to the disappointment that comes from adopting a prescribed personality. Maybe you're actually this shallow and it really makes sense to you. gl gl whatever it is. Don't go back to being worthless if things don't go exactly as you hope, just try more things and learn a little about life. PSPS: Brood War isn't a waste of time Don't knock it just because you are trying to do something new. Hobbies make people interesting. Well I think the OP's point is not about trying to be popular or cool, but that it helps if you break your isolation. What the OP listed were just some examples that helped him. In times of depression you naturally seek safety and isolation, and that could cause a downward spiral that makes things worse. However, there is a pitfall here. People who are truly medically depressed will not benefit from some guy just telling them to start having fun. The whole problem is that they physically cannot experience much pleasure or happiness at all. Those people should consult psychiatrists as getting outside and doing social activities simply will not help without the help of anti-depressants. I think depression as a scientific subject is largely unsolved. However what I sense in the OP is that he just replacing one method of hiding with another. 'No one will judge me if I hide in my dark room and go on the internet anonymously' -> 'No one can judge me because it's not really me, it's a personality I'm embodying' The fear of being judged, of being discovered for who you are and if you'll be rejected or accepted is never resolved. To me it is avoiding a large issue that people who isolate themselves deal with (unnecessarily). Be a little braver and don't put on a big show. To an extent we all have to play little acts throughout life, but the less you have to act the more satisfied you will be. Otherwise you get these weird people who ten years later suddenly admit 'no, I wasn't really like that. the REAL me I kept hidden from everyone' ok super dramaman. I dislike those people... So I ask why is going to dinner and seeing your friend so much more valuable than other hobbies? See your friends, maintain your connections, be real, good, but there is satisfaction from other things in life that you shouldn't reject. If you just go out with friends because this is what society deems you should be doing, then you are still going to end up depressed and unfulfilled. This is what I mean... It's an avoidance of problems even if it is socially acceptable/encouraged. It makes no sense to value drinking in a bar more than playing games. Pills could make you happy, but to people who have to make decisions about whether or not they take drugs to improve their mood, that's not always a satisfying solution. Actually it seems like just another diversion from the real problems.
No need to be a complete ass about it. The guy's got out of his cave, something alot of us here have struggled with, and is trying something new. Just because you don't agree with what he's chosen to do with his newfound freedom doesn't make it 'shallow' or any less valuable than whatever you do (play BW?). Hanging out with people, sharing experiences and communicating doesn't seem like a bad way to spend your free time. Even if it is naive and he it doesnt make him happy at least it's worth a shot, then he can learn from it and become a more complete individual. He's probably got a better chance than some pretentious twat on an internet forum telling people why they are naive, culturally programmed noobs who don't know how to be happy.
This isn't the first time I've seen you on here bashing depression and anti-depressants. You're like a climate change skeptic, not 'believing' in a general scientific consensus simply because you personally disagree with it. As someone on anti-depressants, they didn't make me happy. Instead they relieved enough of the symptoms so that I was able to be treated by a therapist and work through my issues. Then eventually I was happy. The drugs aren't a diversion, they are a means of addressing the real problems and a long term prop to people who have naturally low levels of serotonin.
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Good for you, been there before.
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I've been there in a really bad way. I would go to work at my computer job, come home and surf the web while eating till I went to bed. I did almost nothing physically for 3 years. I got way out of whack and starting developing a strange chronic skin condition like psoriasis. It started to become painful so I just forced myself to start getting out and sweating. Sweating and increased blood flow made it feel better. It eventually went totally away when I developed a habitual exercise regimen.
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On October 26 2011 09:38 HowitZer wrote:
I've been there in a really bad way. I would go to work at my computer job, come home and surf the web while eating till I went to bed. I did almost nothing physically for 3 years. I got way out of whack and starting developing a strange chronic skin condition like psoriasis. It started to become painful so I just forced myself to start getting out and sweating. Sweating and increased blood flow made it feel better. It eventually went totally away when I developed a habitual exercise regimen.
i'm not much of an exercise man myself, i exercise, but not in a way to get rid of my problems i do so cause my family has really bulky builds to our bodies, quite a few years ago I looked really fat and I was in highschool at the time, so i worked out over a summer, and continuted through the fall and results really showed after x-mass break, where not only did i still look "big" but i looked "big" in a good way; and I also have psoriasis.
But I think changing things up is a good way to become a bit happier, but only subtly, big changes typically dont work out too well
Gl with the psoriasis, I have just the normal kind, where my skin just looks silvery and scaly, rather then really ridged or red in patches, and it's not too noticeable. you said it was painful? probably plaque psoriasis, right? try aloe mixed with some milk, it's good i hear for both psoriasis and sunburns.
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On October 26 2011 09:38 HowitZer wrote:
I've been there in a really bad way. I would go to work at my computer job, come home and surf the web while eating till I went to bed. I did almost nothing physically for 3 years. I got way out of whack and starting developing a strange chronic skin condition like psoriasis. It started to become painful so I just forced myself to start getting out and sweating. Sweating and increased blood flow made it feel better. It eventually went totally away when I developed a habitual exercise regimen.
i'm not much of an exercise man myself, i exercise, but not in a way to get rid of my problems i do so cause my family has really bulky builds to our bodies, quite a few years ago I looked fat and I was in highschool at the time, so i worked out over a summer, and continuted through the fall and results really showed after x-mass break, where not only did i still look "big" but i looked "big" in a good way; and I also have psoriasis.
But I think changing things up is a good way to become a bit happier, but only subtly, big changes typically dont work out too well
Gl with the psoriasis, I have just the normal kind, where my skin just looks silvery and scaly, rather then really ridged or red in patches, and it's not too noticeable. you said it was painful? probably plaque psoriasis, right? try aloe mixed with some milk, it's good i hear for both psoriasis and sunburns.
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JAMES IM SO SRY UR DEPRESSED I HAD NO IDEA. IM THERE FOR YA MAN!!!! PLZ CALL ME ASAP. WE WILL SORT THIS SHIT OUT. YOU ALWAYS BEEN LIKE A BROTHER TO ME!
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On October 26 2011 12:31 Tabbris wrote:
JAMES IM SO SRY UR DEPRESSED I HAD NO IDEA. IM THERE FOR YA MAN!!!! PLZ CALL ME ASAP. WE WILL SORT THIS SHIT OUT. YOU ALWAYS BEEN LIKE A BROTHER TO ME!
trololol lance.
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On October 26 2011 06:19 Cress wrote:
I'm entirely sure what this thread means exactly, but I'm glad your out of your bad mindset. Having a clean room and feeling better about your life probably increases your ability to play star craft 2. After all some of the most successful star craft 2 players have a posative mindset on sc2. Probably why those koreans are so good, nothing seems to bother them
Haha, OP's talking about going out and you're talking about Star Craft 2.
Anyway, good on you for cleaning your room and starting to live a better life.
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EPT
