[Q&A] Girls/Relationships - Page 27
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PassiveAce
United States18076 Posts
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Garnet
Vietnam9008 Posts
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Hassybaby
United Kingdom10823 Posts
On November 29 2011 00:02 Garnet wrote: Any chance for an Asian guy vs white girls? Be the perfect level of asian to look exotic, but not too much that they can't understand you. | ||
Mogwai
United States13274 Posts
On November 28 2011 04:42 iamahydralisk wrote: I hate to even do this, but fuck it, I post everything else here so why not. N texted me yesterday and said she wants me back and she'd be willing to consider a normal marriage way down the road. I'm pretty much taken aback and I have no idea what to say. I never asked or expected her to compromise her values for me, but she seems somewhat willing... but it's still not a guarantee. She says her thoughts could change again. I still care for her tons, but honestly, I'm kinda sick of the drama... like I just want to be done with it. so I don't really know what to say to her... Hassy gave good advice. It's a mistake to try to take her back now. Essentially, you had a problem with her, and the only way to get her to even think about fixing it was to break up with her. If that's what it takes to get the problem solved, well, things just aren't going to work out. Getting back together now puts a ton of strain on the relationship because you're going to bear the guilt of knowing that she had to compromise her core values for you. Not to mention that she just proved that she's going to be incredibly needy by trying to reinvent herself again just to get you back. Let this one go. On November 28 2011 23:46 bloopie wrote: I have a similar problem - like I don't really know /try to get a relationship, but even if i work towards one, I don't, like have any sort of impassioned feelings.. I used to, back then when I was a young nerd, but after 2 heartbreaks and quite a few hookups later, I'm just like meh. Girls (some) seem to get worked up over me, which i enjoy but sometimes i can't see the reason for it, and they just think I'm a dick/tool (which I probably am..) who wants some sex. (and ofc I attract girls with daddy issues..) Just throwing it off my chest, i guess. Not sure what to tell you guys. You get into a real relationship by doing real things with a girl and making the effort to get to know her. You go to new places together, try new things together and get to know if this is someone you really want to spend the rest of your life with. If you don't find yourself getting passionate about the person you're seeing, then a serious relationship just isn't in the cards. I'm not sure how you're going about meeting girls, but I generally think that successful relationships typically come from people who meet via a shared interest, rather than people who are just physically attracted to each other at a club/party or meet via well, pretty much any other means. I just think that the best way to meet someone to get into a serious relationship with is to expand your own horizons and try to do something you've always wanted to do. Take a cooking class, a dance class, find people to go backpacking with, etc. Just get yourself out there and do the things you want to do and if you find someone doing things you're interested in, you're more likely to find someone who you can share your life with. Just my $0.02 On November 29 2011 00:02 Garnet wrote: Any chance for an Asian guy vs white girls? Yes, a lot of white girls catch yellow fever in college in my experience. | ||
Hassybaby
United Kingdom10823 Posts
Either way, I suspect, you got this | ||
FractalsOnFire
Australia1756 Posts
On November 29 2011 00:02 Garnet wrote: Any chance for an Asian guy vs white girls? If you haven't visited yet But the best one i saw was the biggest bauss There shouldn't be any 'stigma' or fear about white girls if you're asian. There's nothing that different from other girls. They're still kooky, crazy, manipulative, emotionally draining, a huge time sink, money grubbing and who can make you feel like the happiest person in the world. xD | ||
iamahydralisk
United States813 Posts
today a girl asked me "if an apocalypse happened and you could save 3 people, who would you save?" damn trap question if I've ever seen one. | ||
Mogwai
United States13274 Posts
On December 23 2011 05:21 iamahydralisk wrote: I couldn't really think of a better place to post this, so here we go today a girl asked me "if an apocalypse happened and you could save 3 people, who would you save?" damn trap question if I've ever seen one. 3 people in addition to yourself or do you have to choose whether you'd save yourself too? also, depends on the nature of the apocalypse. for instance, you'd want a different skill-set for a zombie apocalypse than you would for a nuclear holocaust. and you have to clarify the goal of the 3 people you pick. whether the end goal is the survival of the human race or to enjoy the time you have left and accept the extinction of our race. basically, you should dodge the trap by asking for clarification on the question over and over again until she just gets pissy and tells you to forget it. | ||
NationInArms
United States1553 Posts
So, I'm in High School right now, and a girl in one of my classes told me that she likes me. This was Around the second week of January. Since then, we've facebook msged each other, and talked a little more in class, but I don't like her (-ish, let's just say I'm not sure I want to date her for reasons, including the fact that she knows that I like someone more then her). I know that I've probably been in the wrong by kind of leading her on (kind of, we didn't really talk that much before hand), so I need help in how to tell her that I don't like her / want to date her. I'm not sure how to or what to say. Advice please? Also, several friends know about this situation and are pressuring me to go out with her. | ||
StorkHwaiting
United States3465 Posts
On December 23 2011 05:21 iamahydralisk wrote: I couldn't really think of a better place to post this, so here we go today a girl asked me "if an apocalypse happened and you could save 3 people, who would you save?" damn trap question if I've ever seen one. How is it a trap? So ez. Answer: Mom, Dad, and her. To the guy above me: How old are u and how much dating xp do u have? if you don't have much dating xp, I say go for it. Better to learn the ropes with a girl you're not too emotionally involved with. | ||
NationInArms
United States1553 Posts
On February 02 2012 12:45 StorkHwaiting wrote: How is it a trap? So ez. Answer: Mom, Dad, and her. To the guy above me: How old are u and how much dating xp do u have? if you don't have much dating xp, I say go for it. Better to learn the ropes with a girl you're not too emotionally involved with. Uh, what about no dating experience? XD Yeah, I'm not really comfortable with dating when I should be concentrating on school. Also, what really irritates me is that she knows I like someone else, so how am I suppose to have a relationship with someone when I like someone else even more? | ||
erektion
Canada62 Posts
you can date and do well in school lol. don't have a relationship with someone that you are not totally into. don't waste your time, don't experience something that could ruin the wonders of dating. pursue someone you want to be with. | ||
Hassybaby
United Kingdom10823 Posts
On February 02 2012 12:40 NationInArms wrote: BUUUUUUUMP!! So, I'm in High School right now, and a girl in one of my classes told me that she likes me. This was Around the second week of January. Since then, we've facebook msged each other, and talked a little more in class, but I don't like her (-ish, let's just say I'm not sure I want to date her for reasons, including the fact that she knows that I like someone more then her). I know that I've probably been in the wrong by kind of leading her on (kind of, we didn't really talk that much before hand), so I need help in how to tell her that I don't like her / want to date her. I'm not sure how to or what to say. Advice please? Also, several friends know about this situation and are pressuring me to go out with her. First thing's first. Slap your friends for being dicks and trying to pressure you into a relationship that you may not want. Second, if you don't feel it, straight up tell her. Obviously be polite about how you do it, but don't give excuses or beat arounf the bush, just be straight with her. After all, she was with you. | ||
OpticalShot
Canada6330 Posts
Okay, for NationInArms: What others said above is good and true, but I had a slightly different approach. Be warned, it will yield you hilarious stories to share with friends over a beer at some... emotional costs. My philosophy in high school was to date as many as possible - hahaha I said it! - to gain more experience. Yes, I played a fucking RPG game in high school called dating and my goal was to gain a lot of EXP so that when I actually feel strongly about a girl (from my side), I would be near MAX level and have maxed out all my essential skills with all the maps explored and all that good shit. You get the point. EXP gaining was not hard. I had a special talent (called piano and it just penetrates Asian girl defences like no other) and I was always in a 'position of advantage'. So I got to date quite a few girls. The problem is, once you date one, you date that entire 'crowd' or 'clique'. There was at least a 6-month cooldown period before I could re-establish my reputation up with that particular crowd so I could poke at another girl in the same crowd. Even then, I had to face the heat of nasty stares and oh-so-obvious whispers in particular hallways throughout the school. Didn't matter; got EXP. (DM;GE?) The problem is that once I actually felt strongly about a very special girl in my final year of high school, it didn't quite work out. No matter how well I played the game before, this new content which I completely fell for was a challenge like no other. She was like no other. I played the game like the end-game character I was, and she was barely learning the first area outside town. Needless to say I failed my main quest and all my EXP hunting was in vain. Actually regarding that one particular girl, I was planning to make a giant three-part or something girl blog on TL but I keep passing up on that due to laziness, dammit. It's an epic story of love and jealousy and corruption and something similar to Shakespeare's Hamlet and k I'll stop that here. So, adventurer, the choice is yours! I still believe just 'playing around' with chicks that have interest in you is fair game. It's not like you threatened them into a relationship or anything. If you pass up on the opportunity, well you will do good in staying true to your heart, but you will disappoint a lot more people than you think. There are subtle ways of playing along in a relationship then exiting through a 'mutual break-up' and I was able to do that with a less than 50% success rate (hence the date-a-girl = date-the-crowd theory). Do you think you can sign up for 3+ clubs in the upcoming semester to naturally fade away from the girl's sight? Even the fanatical ones grow weary when all they get is facebook updates. Good luck! | ||
Hassybaby
United Kingdom10823 Posts
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TheToast
United States4808 Posts
I disagree with the assesment you make in your last paragraph though, I personally believe it is time for humanity to move to a centralized procreation process where humans are made in factories. Would make much more time for Starcraft 2. Relationships are a complete waste of time, effort, and resources. Also I'm pretty sure they contribute to global warming in some way that I haven't quite figured out yet. | ||
Hassybaby
United Kingdom10823 Posts
Think long and hard about where this course of action is going! | ||
Jealous
10079 Posts
On February 02 2012 12:40 NationInArms wrote: BUUUUUUUMP!! So, I'm in High School right now, and a girl in one of my classes told me that she likes me. This was Around the second week of January. Since then, we've facebook msged each other, and talked a little more in class, but I don't like her (-ish, let's just say I'm not sure I want to date her for reasons, including the fact that she knows that I like someone more then her). I know that I've probably been in the wrong by kind of leading her on (kind of, we didn't really talk that much before hand), so I need help in how to tell her that I don't like her / want to date her. I'm not sure how to or what to say. Advice please? Also, several friends know about this situation and are pressuring me to go out with her. Many traditional people get married off to people they don't know. And guess what? Eventually, they find love. To them, love is something that you learn by appreciating your partner that you did not choose. If people can achieve this, I think it's correct to assume that you can't be sure that you don't want to date her. Dating doesn't have to be (and isn't) that serious on the grand scale of things. What I mean by this, is that if things aren't working out between you two as people, you will just break up and that's that. Treat her right and be honest and it will happen peacefully. If things ARE working out, then you get a girlfriend you like ^o^; It's like win-win except win-neutral. I guess you'll probably get laid, so it's win-win in my books. | ||
TheToast
United States4808 Posts
On February 03 2012 01:32 Hassybaby wrote: Toast if your suggestion is actually carried out, we'd have no need for girl blogs Think long and hard about where this course of action is going! Even more time for SC2. Maybe even UT2004 and CS:S. Also more time for people to write cooking blogs which are clearly superior to girl blogs. (Also I could then secretly co-opt the facitily and begin production of a race of super soldiers to take over the world.... muahahahaha!!!) | ||
Servius_Fulvius
United States947 Posts
On February 02 2012 12:40 NationInArms wrote: BUUUUUUUMP!! So, I'm in High School right now, and a girl in one of my classes told me that she likes me. This was Around the second week of January. Since then, we've facebook msged each other, and talked a little more in class, but I don't like her (-ish, let's just say I'm not sure I want to date her for reasons, including the fact that she knows that I like someone more then her). I know that I've probably been in the wrong by kind of leading her on (kind of, we didn't really talk that much before hand), so I need help in how to tell her that I don't like her / want to date her. I'm not sure how to or what to say. Advice please? Also, several friends know about this situation and are pressuring me to go out with her. I'm surprised no one has mentioned this yet: If you like someone else then why aren't you pursuing her? The first thing you have to do is ask the first girl out. If she says yes then awesome, you can go on a date with the girl you like. If she says no then you can get over it. Now, for the girl who likes you. There's nothing wrong with becoming friends, talking, and even going on a few dates. In fact, this girl took risk to tell you her feelings (so she already has more balls than your typical TL girl blogger), so I'm glad you gave her the chance to become friends, at least. As I said, there's nothing wrong with going on a few dates to see if there's anything there. HOWEVER, you need to make very clear that you don't feel the same way she does at the moment. You're not leading someone on by hanging out or going out because you enjoy the others' company UNLESS they don't know your perspective. There's no harm if, after a few dates, you tell her she's not for you and just remain friends. | ||
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