EPTtldr; you're all pussies
also hi moggie !
[Q&A] Girls/Relationships - Page 29
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HeavOnEarth
United States7087 Posts
tldr; you're all pussies also hi moggie ! | ||
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Salv
Canada3083 Posts
On February 04 2012 07:43 HeavOnEarth wrote: attention all: you are wasting time. just go out and fucking do w.e u think is right. if it isnt tldr; you're all pussies also hi moggie ! Yup. All the little intricacies that people fret about don't really matter. In fact, to people who look for the most comfortable and least risky situations to ask out a girl, it's probably more impressive to a girl when a guy asks when there is a risk. For example: I have a friend who insists on asking out girls in a very, very casual way, almost to the point where it seems like he isn't interested. He'll tell them that he's doing something, and that she can come if she wants to - that way if she says no it's not embarrassing. Only problem is that any chick I talk to says that they would feel like he doesn't care enough about a date if they were asked out like that. Basically, just ask girls out, you'll do a lot better than trying to theorycraft it all day. | ||
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Mogwai
United States13274 Posts
On February 04 2012 07:43 HeavOnEarth wrote: attention all: you are wasting time. just go out and fucking do w.e u think is right. if it isnt tldr; you're all pussies also hi moggie ! sup ezpz *shrug* this is like telling people who find comfort in theorycrafting that they need to suck it up, play the damn game and learn from their mistakes. I mean, yea, one way or another you need to play the game, but if you choose to just play more and more and learn from your mistakes or use your downtime to theorycraft is a choice of preference. one way works for some people, doesn't for others, and vice versa. there's not necessarily a right or wrong way to go about doing it. least that's how I see it. besides, if no one asked for relationship advice, how else would I kill boring work days when there's no interesting LoL discussion going on? | ||
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NationInArms
United States1553 Posts
On February 04 2012 07:43 HeavOnEarth wrote: attention all: you are wasting time. just go out and fucking do w.e u think is right. if it isnt tldr; you're all pussies also hi moggie ! Well, usually that would be my mantra, in video games that is. Ok, so I think I'm either going to tell her that I don't like her or go out on a date and see what happens (and it'll probably turn into me saying I don't like her anyways). On February 02 2012 23:46 OpticalShot wrote: + Show Spoiler + I prefer separate girl blogs than one giant thread because as soon as two stories come in things get mixed up and wah wah wah. Also, Hassy you are catching up in postcount, how do you find more girl blogs than me? I'm pretty much on TL 8 hrs/day (bored at work). Okay, for NationInArms: What others said above is good and true, but I had a slightly different approach. Be warned, it will yield you hilarious stories to share with friends over a beer at some... emotional costs. My philosophy in high school was to date as many as possible - hahaha I said it! - to gain more experience. Yes, I played a fucking RPG game in high school called dating and my goal was to gain a lot of EXP so that when I actually feel strongly about a girl (from my side), I would be near MAX level and have maxed out all my essential skills with all the maps explored and all that good shit. You get the point. EXP gaining was not hard. I had a special talent (called piano and it just penetrates Asian girl defences like no other) and I was always in a 'position of advantage'. So I got to date quite a few girls. The problem is, once you date one, you date that entire 'crowd' or 'clique'. There was at least a 6-month cooldown period before I could re-establish my reputation up with that particular crowd so I could poke at another girl in the same crowd. Even then, I had to face the heat of nasty stares and oh-so-obvious whispers in particular hallways throughout the school. Didn't matter; got EXP. (DM;GE?) The problem is that once I actually felt strongly about a very special girl in my final year of high school, it didn't quite work out. No matter how well I played the game before, this new content which I completely fell for was a challenge like no other. She was like no other. I played the game like the end-game character I was, and she was barely learning the first area outside town. Needless to say I failed my main quest and all my EXP hunting was in vain. Actually regarding that one particular girl, I was planning to make a giant three-part or something girl blog on TL but I keep passing up on that due to laziness, dammit. It's an epic story of love and jealousy and corruption and something similar to Shakespeare's Hamlet and k I'll stop that here. So, adventurer, the choice is yours! I still believe just 'playing around' with chicks that have interest in you is fair game. It's not like you threatened them into a relationship or anything. If you pass up on the opportunity, well you will do good in staying true to your heart, but you will disappoint a lot more people than you think. There are subtle ways of playing along in a relationship then exiting through a 'mutual break-up' and I was able to do that with a less than 50% success rate (hence the date-a-girl = date-the-crowd theory). Do you think you can sign up for 3+ clubs in the upcoming semester to naturally fade away from the girl's sight? Even the fanatical ones grow weary when all they get is facebook updates. Good luck! When you were EXP gaining, did you ever actually like the girl you were dating? 0_o On February 03 2012 13:23 KazeHydra wrote: [spoiler]Hey Nation, First of all, do not let peer pressure influence your decision. If you have no interest, then there's no reason to start a relationship. Starting a relationship half-heartedly will not end well. Although, I can't deny OpticalShot's perspective that it's more of a trade off in exchange for some fun stories and useful experiences. Considering you have no *real* interest in this girl, you should set her straight asap and not give her false hope. You are probably complicating this in your mind more than you should be (which is completely normal in your situation, at almost any age) but the reality is you just need to say what's on your mind. Give her the reasons you are giving yourself. Even if you try to console her with some "well maybe in the future..." make sure, or at least do your best with the intention of, she realizes you are not interested for whatever reasons. Unfortunately, I do not have the ability to advise you in how to do this, but I can say that the longer you ignore the topic, the more led on she will be and harder she'll take it when you do tell her. If all else fails, just tell her to watch 5 cm/s and be like "you are Kanae; I am Tohno. sorry." With that said, while I don't agree with the idea of not dating during high school, I can definitely understand where your parents are coming from. The vast majority of high school relationships are pretty shallow, weak, and meaningless. You haven't mentioned your opinion on your parents' rule, but I'd just like to point out their opinion is not entirely misplaced. I mean, even if they have some completely ridiculous reasoning behind it, the rule itself is not such a bad idea. [spoiler] Thank you for your advice KazeHydra, I'll probably follow it. OTL | ||
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iamahydralisk
United States813 Posts
Basically, she still wants to go on her mission (I'm pretty sure I mentioned that before), and that'd be about a year and a half from now. She'd be gone for two years, and I'd be willing to wait, but she told me something that scares me... she told me she might come back and be a "different" person, and that she might want to settle down with some Mormon guy, and in that case, my ass would be out the door. She said she doesn't expect that to happen, but the fact that it's a possibility scares me. I've been having some mental battles lately because I do love her very much and I want to wait for her when the time comes, but it's going to be hard to do so when I know that her mission could change things between us, and it makes it more difficult to be happy now because I'm less optimistic about the future. Another thing I'll mention briefly is that we're back to not having sex again, but that honestly doesn't bother me too much. It'd be nice if we could, but I understand where she's coming from, and I know we can't have sex now if we want to stay together. The final thing I want to mention is something else that's been bothering me a bit. I've noticed that my girlfriend is kind of socially awkward and it makes it hard for me to try to integrate her with my social circle. I'm the type of person who actively tries to involve their significant other in their social life, but it's hard for me to do that with her because she's just kind of odd around people who aren't me. The fact that she's a bit on the odd side doesn't bother me at all because I know what she's really like (and I love that side of her), but it does bother me a little bit that I can't really integrate her into my social life very easily. So, that's where I'm at now. Things are a lot better than they were before, but it's still hard because part of me feels like her mission is basically impending doom for our relationship. I guess only time will tell. | ||
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Hassybaby
United Kingdom10823 Posts
-First, I slightly wanna slap you but as long as you guys are happy, its all good. -Second, fuck worrying about the future. Just enjoy it while you can and if you make it, be pleasantly surprised to do! -Third, you should just introduce her to your circle slowly, so she gets to know them. Throwing her in the deep pool may be overwhelming, but a few at a time should be OK | ||
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Mogwai
United States13274 Posts
From your more recent posts on the situation, I'm getting a combination of neediness and lack of commitment from her end. Trust me, that's a really bad combination. When she's giving herself easy outs to the relationship with a 2 year mission that might change her, you really ought to be thinking long and hard about why she's worth the wait and the risk. I dunno man, I kinda wanna just mirror Hassy's thoughts that as long as you're happy, it's all good, but at the same time, the fact that you're posting here to talk about it leads me to believe that you're convincing yourself that you're actually happier than you are. I've wasted a lot of time in unhappy relationships just cause I was capable of convincing myself that I was actually happy despite being miserable about them. Regarding friends, just set something up where you can hang out with a small subset of your friends that she would get along with. In my experience, it's just about introducing your significant other to the right 1 or 2 people in your social circle that she can most easily relate to. | ||
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Chaggi
Korea (South)1936 Posts
And now I'm scared cause this seems too good. | ||
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Mogwai
United States13274 Posts
On February 18 2012 01:03 Chaggi wrote: For the first time in my life, I have a really really good and supporting girlfriend. And now I'm scared cause this seems too good. Stop it. You have a good thing, don't ruin it by worrying that it's too good. If you take this approach to life, you'll never be happy with anything. | ||
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Hassybaby
United Kingdom10823 Posts
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unichan
United States4223 Posts
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Chaggi
Korea (South)1936 Posts
On February 18 2012 01:11 Hassybaby wrote: Chaggi I will cut you with Occam's Razor if you think like that. Crazy idea: if you're happy its because she makes you happy. Facts in front of you. Just enjoy it IT HURTS I JUST GOT CUT WTF NOW I GOTTA GO BUY A BANDAID BRB no really I just got a papercut thanks a lot On February 18 2012 01:09 Mogwai wrote: Stop it. You have a good thing, don't ruin it by worrying that it's too good. If you take this approach to life, you'll never be happy with anything. yeah, It's just a nagging feeling at the back of my mind. Feels weird that I come to Korea and find someone that really fits me. | ||
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Mogwai
United States13274 Posts
On February 18 2012 01:15 unichan wrote: i wish there was a way to just filter the hydralisk's posts so i could read his whole story without having to figure out which was the last part i read. maybe even make a fucking tv drama out of it lol hit the all button for the pages, and then just search on iamahydralisk and read them. | ||
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iamahydralisk
United States813 Posts
On February 18 2012 00:59 Mogwai wrote: I don't want to sound like a prick or overstep my bounds here, but what exactly makes this girl so special for you hydra? It seems like the whole relationship has been wrought with frustration and difficulties, yet you keep coming back and I guess I'm just trying to figure out why exactly this girl is worth doing distance, denying yourself sex and fretting over a nonsensical future where she "might become a different person." From your more recent posts on the situation, I'm getting a combination of neediness and lack of commitment from her end. Trust me, that's a really bad combination. When she's giving herself easy outs to the relationship with a 2 year mission that might change her, you really ought to be thinking long and hard about why she's worth the wait and the risk. I dunno man, I kinda wanna just mirror Hassy's thoughts that as long as you're happy, it's all good, but at the same time, the fact that you're posting here to talk about it leads me to believe that you're convincing yourself that you're actually happier than you are. I've wasted a lot of time in unhappy relationships just cause I was capable of convincing myself that I was actually happy despite being miserable about them. Regarding friends, just set something up where you can hang out with a small subset of your friends that she would get along with. In my experience, it's just about introducing your significant other to the right 1 or 2 people in your social circle that she can most easily relate to. The part I bolded is what I'm struggling with a lot. I do like being in my current relationship, but I also think I could be happier with a different relationship. But then, I think about how my girlfriend accepts all my quirks and loves me anyway, and how hard it could be to find another person like that... so I really don't know. | ||
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Mogwai
United States13274 Posts
see, when you're talking about struggling with how hard you perceive finding someone who will love you for your little idiosyncrasies, and weighing that versus, well, let's call a spade a spade, the major issues with her (no sex, long distance, and a high likelyhood of 2 years of considerably longer distance after which she may just ditch you for a mormon guy), it really makes me wonder why you're fighting so hard for it. You say she loves you for who you are, but what does that really means when the course she's set for her life involves being away from you and she's so unsure about the relationship that she'd feed you that stuff about "oh, maybe I'll become a different person and not love you anymore." Look, everyone changes; again, par for the being-human course. she doesn't need to explain to you that 2 years can change a person, but she's going out of her way to spell out a specific bad scenario from this, and that's saying a lot to me about her actual faith in the long term relationship. it's one thing to say that you love someone, another thing to act like you love someone around them, and then there's the third thing that people ignore too often, which is driving your life towards being with the person you love. the problem I've run into is that breaking something off because of each of you doing what feels right for you and having those not line up feels really shitty, but in the long run, it's generally for the better. So maybe she says she loves you, and maybe you feel loved when you're around her, and that's all well and good, but the course her life is set on is not lining up well with yours, and that makes me think this isn't going to end well. just my $0.02, but what do I know, I'm just another dude on the internet. | ||
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ThunderGod
New Zealand897 Posts
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ThunderGod
New Zealand897 Posts
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Jealous
10175 Posts
On April 26 2012 08:56 ThunderGod wrote: Anyone know what happened to Largasse and his advice thread?? Can't find through search - need to PM him (or someone else qualified). Larjarse. He's not "qualified." His threads died a long time ago. | ||
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iamahydralisk
United States813 Posts
I posted a different blog about it when it happened, but concert girl and I broke up. I got broken up with, if you want to be specific. That was about three weeks ago. I'm still hurting, but I'm moving on. The main reason I'm posting this is because I'm crushing on a new girl, but things aren't going so well, and I need some advice. Basically, I met this girl two nights ago. She works at an ice cream shop in the mall, and I got some ice cream there two nights ago. I started up a conversation that lasted about 45 minutes all together (it was close to closing time so it wasn't busy, but there were a few customers, and I'd go and mind my own business when a customer came up so I wasn't distracting her). At the end, I got her number, and waited until the next night (last night) to text her. She responded pretty immediately, and we exchanged a few texts. She seemed interested and happy to talk to me (no one word replies and quite a few smiley faces), and after a while, I asked her if she wanted to get coffee on Sunday. No reply. Still no reply when I got up this morning. I waited until the afternoon to text her again, and all I sent was something to the effect of "Hey, you didn't answer my question last night. Would you like to go out on Sunday?" Still no reply, 6 hours later. I'm really confused as to where I went wrong here. We hit it off pretty damn well in person, and I asked her then if she would want to go out sometime, and she said yes, so I don't understand why she'd all of a sudden stop replying when I text her about it. In addition to being hella confused about what went wrong here, I'm also confused about what I should do next. I haven't texted her since then, and I'm not planning on texting her again tonight. What can I do to get her attention again? She seemed really interested before, so I think there's definitely something there. Should I call her tomorrow, or text her and just ask how she's doing, or bring up the date idea again? Or something else haha. Any help would be greatly appreciated. | ||
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Servius_Fulvius
United States947 Posts
On May 12 2012 13:41 iamahydralisk wrote: Hey all. I figured it's update time. I posted a different blog about it when it happened, but concert girl and I broke up. I got broken up with, if you want to be specific. That was about three weeks ago. I'm still hurting, but I'm moving on. The main reason I'm posting this is because I'm crushing on a new girl, but things aren't going so well, and I need some advice. Basically, I met this girl two nights ago. She works at an ice cream shop in the mall, and I got some ice cream there two nights ago. I started up a conversation that lasted about 45 minutes all together (it was close to closing time so it wasn't busy, but there were a few customers, and I'd go and mind my own business when a customer came up so I wasn't distracting her). At the end, I got her number, and waited until the next night (last night) to text her. She responded pretty immediately, and we exchanged a few texts. She seemed interested and happy to talk to me (no one word replies and quite a few smiley faces), and after a while, I asked her if she wanted to get coffee on Sunday. No reply. Still no reply when I got up this morning. I waited until the afternoon to text her again, and all I sent was something to the effect of "Hey, you didn't answer my question last night. Would you like to go out on Sunday?" Still no reply, 6 hours later. I'm really confused as to where I went wrong here. We hit it off pretty damn well in person, and I asked her then if she would want to go out sometime, and she said yes, so I don't understand why she'd all of a sudden stop replying when I text her about it. In addition to being hella confused about what went wrong here, I'm also confused about what I should do next. I haven't texted her since then, and I'm not planning on texting her again tonight. What can I do to get her attention again? She seemed really interested before, so I think there's definitely something there. Should I call her tomorrow, or text her and just ask how she's doing, or bring up the date idea again? Or something else haha. Any help would be greatly appreciated. First things first - slow the hell down! You're going from one girl to another without giving yourself any time for rest. It's great you can strike up a conversation and get a number, but is it really the best thing for you right now? As for the situation: you're over-thinking it. If it's something like a date you shouldn't be texting it in the first place. Maybe she thought she was getting a new friend and you jumped straight away into first date. There are a million other possibilities, but it's utterly pointless to try and figure them out. Either give her a call/go see her at work and ask there, or drop it entirely and keep on texting random conversation. | ||
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