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![[image loading]](http://i.imgur.com/Vw6mS.png)
Blizzard to Create Custom Race for TLO
Dario Wünsch, also known as “TheLittleOne” or “TLO”, has had a bit of a racial identity crisis in Starcraft 2. In the Beta, he wowed the SC2 community with his creative play with all 3 races. His strong finishes and immense popularity earned him a spot on the prestigious Team Liquid. However, after SC2 was released, he was forced to take a strong look inward about his race selection. He meditated for days atop Germany's tallest hill, living only on strong German beer that flowed as streams and rivers around the hill and the sausages that grew plentiful in the trees. (Ed. Note: this is how I picture Germany and anything else would be a disappointment) Eventually, he came to the conclusion that Terran was his best race and opted to focus solely on that race.
As TLO struggled to go far in GSL and other tournaments with Terran, he needed to take another deep look into his soul. After about 20 seconds, he decided Zerg was more fun and chose to compete in Blizzcon as Zerg to the surprise of the SC2 world. Unfortunately, he pulled a MorroW and lost 2 ZvZ's at Blizzcon in his Zerg debut. He continued to struggle with Zerg, only doing well in some minor tournament in the US. After his poor results as Zerg, TLO needed to return home to contemplate his race once again.
With the year turning over, and back in his home country of Germany, TLO finally decided to switch back to Random. While he did win the Poker Idol SC2 European Championship and qualified for TSL, many currently believe he still has problems with some matchups and he would be best served picking one race or race pick to get certain matchups. Fortunately for TLO, he won't have to make that choice or any more deep, life-changing decisions related to his choice of race.
Earlier today, Blizzard announced they will be creating a custom race just for TLO. It will be called Prozerran and will combine all of TLO's favorite units of each race.
![[image loading]](http://i.imgur.com/QSSwv.png)
The new Prozerran logo+ Show Spoiler +This is the reason I haven't put an article out in over a week. I hope you can appreciate the fine quality of this image and the hard work and time I put into it
The Prozerran race will feature the Infestor, Ghost (w/ nukes preloaded of course), Thor, Colossus, Raven, Queen, Hellion, and pretty much any other unit TLO wants included.
Dustin Browder, the Lead Developer of Starcraft 2, made a statement regarding this announcement, “We have been watching TLO since the beta and were amazed by his creative play. Sadly, we've also seen his immense struggle with his racial identity. It has been very rough to see him unable to find true happiness with a particular race. Honestly, it keeps me up some nights thinking about his sad story. It is truly amazing to see him still have some success despite all the hardships he's experienced in his Starcraft 2 career. This is why we want to try to end his struggle by finally giving him a race that he can finally be happy with.”
When asked how the new race will affect balance, particularly with so many Prozerran units being good against Marines, Browder suddenly turned pale and said, “Oh shit, I forgot about my preciou- er, the Marine. We'll have to rethink this.” It is believed Blizzard will use this as an excuse to finally buff the underpowered marine.
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+ Show Spoiler [Infested Archon archive] +
 
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A+ would read again.
Always hilarious, keep it up.
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I feel like this isn't as funny as your previous works. It's more like "yeah TLO is that badass" than "Harr harr." It basically just seems like something someone would say in a LR thread: TLO deserves a race just for himself!
What's the funniest things that you do is when you take a hot topic(Idra leaving, EG's announcement) and turn it into something hilarious. Rather than just pay homage to our German hero.
That image is badass though....+ Show Spoiler +
*Imagines a portrait of TLO. The Zerg icon an eye-patch for TLO, the Protoss icon part of a mask which covers his chin-right lower face, and the Terran icon the beginning of the shoulder-body that you see in portraits. *
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That image, blown up as a TLO wallpaper would be pretty fucking sweet.
Well done! I continue to follow your great work!
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Haha well done, as usual. Keep up the great work, dude.
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Haha, I was thinking about IA today wondering if they ran out of ideas considering it's been relatively quiet lately.
Now this.
Haha, gold!
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Prozerran so underpowered. They haven't won anything.
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A+ all the way, haha.
This was just amazing.
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I love Prozerran, sixpool4gate2rax is best opening ever!
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United States4126 Posts
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Ha, I think that was among the finalists, but I opted for the more pharmaceutical sounding and equal opportunity (3 letters from each race's name) Prozerran. That's a good catch on the Gretorp part, tho, I didn't think of that 
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On March 11 2011 07:44 Hoju wrote:
He meditated for days atop Germany's tallest hill, living only on strong German beer that flowed as streams and rivers around the hill and the sausages that grew plentiful in the trees. (Ed. Note: this is how I picture Germany and anything else would be a disappointment)
Yeah, that sounds about right. Also animals made of Schnitzel.
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I lol'ed xDD
thanks for making my day a lil bit better
//tx
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Meh 4/5
anyway I'm pretty sure TLO played Terran at PokerIdol, at least in the finals anyway. =)
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You're articles are awesome. Keep up the good work.
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On March 11 2011 08:31 ranjutan wrote:
Meh 4/5
anyway I'm pretty sure TLO played Terran at PokerIdol, at least in the finals anyway. =)
I think you're right, but he was listed as Random for that tournament on liquipedia and registered as Random. TLPD shows him as only playing Terran, but he only played Terrans, so he might've been race picking? I know that was the first indication of TLO going back to Random, so I just left it as Random rather than saying he went back to Terran  No one remembers anyway since the coverage of that tournament was so bad and SCRI and TL Open were going on too.
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Quality blog.
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On March 11 2011 08:47 AntiLegend wrote:
give this man a star!
How about 5?
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Oh IA, you never fail to amuse
Great work as usual!
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prozerran.... probably the best sounding 3 race smashup in existance rofl!!
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Hey, you got it all wrong, marines are totally OP!
I am joking, please don't scream at me.
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I think Prozerran should have two different hellions, perhaps with slightly different textures, in order to satisfy TLO's hunger for building hellions. I think i saw him make hellions in a PvP one time.
It's telling that TLO's early to midgame counter to roaches is Enough Hellions.
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Everyone knows that TLO is secretly a Xel Naga player. He is the perfect fusion of the purity of essence and purity of form, with a bit of Terran ingenuity thrown in there. I also heard that he is quite a Supreme Commander.
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your work is just awesome! :D
either my english is horrible, or there is a typo tho
"he needed took another deep "
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Great read 5/5 :D I <3 IA
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Loooolll
VERY much like The Onion.
Good read, bud!
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Someone already plays this race. He's actually Gretorp's brother whos name is Gretorp backwards. See what he did there? >:
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United Arab Emirates874 Posts
Awesome read! Prozerran Is so IMBA!
Good job as usual, Like the other articles.
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Best one yet, because of the Twitter Posts and Germany xDDD
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Germany767 Posts
HAHA I always loved your blogs, NOW I am your biggest fan! :D
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On March 11 2011 17:31 Liquid`TLO wrote:
HAHA I always loved your blogs, NOW I am your biggest fan! :D
:D :D :D
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Mmmm TLO is so delicious.
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Haha this is gold! Prozerran should also get a 300 cap too. Only seems fair.
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Will they add new hybrid units too? Zerglings that can shoot ranged like Marines and have Zealot shields?
That'd be balanced. *cough*
(this, like the entire thread, is a joke )
...at least I think the thread is joking?
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Germany767 Posts
(this, like the entire thread, is a joke )
Last edit: 2011-03-11 17:42:04
...at least I think the thread is joking?
nope I just checked my inbox, I got an email by Dustin, with a patch attached.
Patching right now, only I will have to install, so dont worry you wont all have to update the game just because of me.
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On March 11 2011 17:51 Liquid`TLO wrote:Show nested quote +(this, like the entire thread, is a joke )
Last edit: 2011-03-11 17:42:04
...at least I think the thread is joking? nope I just checked my inbox, I got an email by Dustin, with a patch attached. Patching right now, only I will have to install, so dont worry you wont all have to update the game just because of me.
That is so kind of Blizzard to make it convenient for your opponents, and people say Blizzard dosen't care!
Move over Moon, there's a new 4th race in town!
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O come on TLO dont teese the crowd!
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I am glad to see that Blizzard doesn't shy away from the ever-so-awkward topic of the german post-war struggle with racial identity... Sadly, the recent Prozerran update renders my doctoral dissertation "Random Identity or The Starcraft Way - will TLO lead East- and West-German citizens on a new path towards the Europe of the future?" void. And I was so close to finishing it.
Also, what about all the merchan-dice? (Worst pun ever, I apologize).
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Aw meeeehn!! I LOVE IT! ♥ :D
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Thank god.
I was just thinking the other day how useless the current marine is - at least they are recognizing it and will FINALLY give terran the buff they've needed so badly.
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EPT
