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ugh so i just had my fourth 6+month break up, and it was also my second 1yr+, clocking in at 1 year and 1 month.
for being only 21, i find it a little gross that i have spent so much time not being single. anyone else out there focusing on moving on?
i guess some relevant info is that i dumped her, it was semi long distance for the last two months but we saw each other every week anyway, because shes crazy. I met her while I was in college with no real plans of seeing her afterwards, and here we are.
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On August 05 2010 12:16 Gene wrote: i find it a little gross that i have spent so much time not being single
[/brag]
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haha i feel u man. In almost the same situation now hahaha. Well im moving on now
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As long as you enjoy the relationships while they last, it's generally worth it. I think it's stupid that people use the fact that they won't last forever as a reason not to have relationships.
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i find it a little gross that i have spent so much time being single (me)
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On August 05 2010 12:25 Pokebunny wrote: As long as you enjoy the relationships while they last, it's generally worth it. I think it's stupid that people use the fact that they won't last forever as a reason not to have relationships.
This is a good bit of wisdom.
Have fun while you're in a relationship, but also have fun while you are single. Look on the bright side - you can use all the free time you have now to hang out with guy friends, go to the gym, play basketball, play starcraft. Pick up a hobby or learn something new to fill up the time and keep your mind off of things.
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On August 05 2010 12:19 Megalisk wrote:Show nested quote +On August 05 2010 12:16 Gene wrote: i find it a little gross that i have spent so much time not being single [/brag]
that isnt really a brag at all.
being single is much more fun, depending on your life style i suppose
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Yeah, I hate breaking girls' hearts, especially since they've confessed to you that they love you and want to marry you. I find it to be such a pain having to fuck one girl after the other all the time and not having time to myself. I guess it's just a curse I have to live with, being too attractive you can't really walk down the street without beautiful women noticing you. I feel you man.
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On August 05 2010 12:30 c.Deadly wrote:Have fun while you're in a relationship, but also have fun while you are single. Look on the bright side - you can use all the free time you have now to hang out with guy friends, go to the gym, play basketball, play starcraft. Pick up a hobby or learn something new to fill up the time and keep your mind off of things. What's to stop you from doing those while in a relationship...
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On August 05 2010 12:27 zeks wrote: i find it a little gross that i have spent so much time being single (me)
Me too man, me too.
Breaking up is hard, but by looking at your post you shouldn't have too much trouble if it is true.
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On August 05 2010 12:25 Pokebunny wrote: As long as you enjoy the relationships while they last, it's generally worth it. I think it's stupid that people use the fact that they won't last forever as a reason not to have relationships.
im glad you brought that up, because i disagree ENTIRELY. there is a difference between THINKING it wont last forever, and knowing it wont. I never go into a relationship thinking it wont last forever. generally in a relationship i also believe it has the potential to do so, becuase otherwise...:
when you are sure there will one day be an end to your relationship, why on earth would you continue it? that is nearly the same as leading someone on in my opinion, and it will only waste your time, their time, and hurt more in the end.
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On August 05 2010 12:34 Divinek wrote:Show nested quote +On August 05 2010 12:19 Megalisk wrote:On August 05 2010 12:16 Gene wrote: i find it a little gross that i have spent so much time not being single [/brag] that isnt really a brag at all. being single is much more fun, depending on your life style i suppose
and megalisk, while i guess some may find it that way, i agree with diviniek. Being in a relationship is really great and all, so sure maybe it could be a brag. But after spending the better portion of my last seven years in one, I really wish i had the independence to stay single. I don't, sadly. My times being single were always very, very fun. While there is still a lot to say for being able to wake up next to someone every day, when it turns sour and wkaing up next to them just sucks and you dont have the balls to end it for like another month, shit is torture.
On August 05 2010 12:41 JohannesH wrote:Show nested quote +On August 05 2010 12:30 c.Deadly wrote:Have fun while you're in a relationship, but also have fun while you are single. Look on the bright side - you can use all the free time you have now to hang out with guy friends, go to the gym, play basketball, play starcraft. Pick up a hobby or learn something new to fill up the time and keep your mind off of things. What's to stop you from doing those while in a relationship...
Your girlfriend's INSANE jealousy. and he was also merely giving me ideas to spend my time not thinking about a very recent ex, and I thank you very much, c.Deadly. Which is typically something hard to do. I just pick up smoking again.
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On August 05 2010 12:38 Pineapple wrote: Yeah, I hate breaking girls' hearts, especially since they've confessed to you that they love you and want to marry you. I find it to be such a pain having to fuck one girl after the other all the time and not having time to myself. I guess it's just a curse I have to live with, being too attractive you can't really walk down the street without beautiful women noticing you. I feel you man.
i have no idea what to make of your post. I dont think i've put out the idea that i sleep with many people. Because I really, really, really dont.
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On August 05 2010 13:10 Gene wrote:Show nested quote +On August 05 2010 12:25 Pokebunny wrote: As long as you enjoy the relationships while they last, it's generally worth it. I think it's stupid that people use the fact that they won't last forever as a reason not to have relationships. im glad you brought that up, because i disagree ENTIRELY. there is a difference between THINKING it wont last forever, and knowing it wont. I never go into a relationship thinking it wont last forever. generally in a relationship i also believe it has the potential to do so, becuase otherwise...: when you are sure there will one day be an end to your relationship, why on earth would you continue it? that is nearly the same as leading someone on in my opinion, and it will only waste your time, their time, and hurt more in the end.
So do you think people under 18 shouldn't have any kind of sexual relationship, just because the chance of it ending in marriage is 0.0000001%? I'm pretty sure everyone acknowledges that their relationships in high school aren't gonna last forever, but hey, they're horny and have nothing better to do. Relationships aren't all about permanent stability anymore.
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I dont think that is at all what i said, and if so, I surely didnt mean it. I dont think age EVER was a factor in what i said, nor was a relationship being sexual or not.
My point is, every relationship I go into, i fully believe it has a chance to last forever.
If and when i realize, no, it really cant, I should end it. I haven't been great at it, but I've stuck to it. My point is that if i realize the relationship is absolutely going to end someday, end it now. save the time and pain.
To clarify, in each relation in which i was the one to end it, i realized that I wont be happy in this relationship forever. There is going to come a day where i just cant take it anymore. When that realization has occured, I SHOULD end it asap. This time it took me a month, however. Which I am a little embarassed about.
That being said, I was dumped twice out of these four relationships. half and half.
Moreover, merely having sex with someone does not consitute a relationship in my book. a FWB, fuckbuddy, or anything similar is not a relationship. I would relate a relationship most aptly with something exclusive and committed. Though not a perfect description, im at a severe lack of words to describe it aptly in my current state. drowning emotions currently. working l ike a charm.
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You know what they say, it's better to have loved and been hurt than to not have loved at all. Dont worry man, you're still young, when you find the right girl, you will know.
also, Happy Birthday Pokebunny! =D
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On August 05 2010 13:21 Gene wrote: I dont think that is at all what i said, and if so, I surely didnt mean it. I dont think age EVER was a factor in what i said, nor was a relationship being sexual or not.
My point is, every relationship I go into, i fully believe it has a chance to last forever.
If and when i realize, no, it really cant, I should end it. I haven't been great at it, but I've stuck to it. My point is that if i realize the relationship is absolutely going to end someday, end it now. save the time and pain.
To clarify, in each relation in which i was the one to end it, i realized that I wont be happy in this relationship forever. There is going to come a day where i just cant take it anymore. When that realization has occured, I SHOULD end it asap. This time it took me a month, however. Which I am a little embarassed about.
That being said, I was dumped twice out of these four relationships. half and half.
Meh. I've had times where I really thought I loved a couple people (yea yea I just turned 15 today, leave the "you're too young to know what you're talking about" shit for elsewhere) but I still recognized that it wasn't gonna last forever. That didn't stop me from enjoying while I "believed" it would last. I guess we just have different perspectives, which is totally respectable and I do see your side of the discussion.
edit to your edit: no, I guess when I said sexual relationship I mostly meant serious relationship. It's hard to draw a line.
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On August 05 2010 13:15 Gene wrote:Show nested quote +On August 05 2010 12:38 Pineapple wrote: Yeah, I hate breaking girls' hearts, especially since they've confessed to you that they love you and want to marry you. I find it to be such a pain having to fuck one girl after the other all the time and not having time to myself. I guess it's just a curse I have to live with, being too attractive you can't really walk down the street without beautiful women noticing you. I feel you man. i have no idea what to make of your post. I dont think i've put out the idea that i sleep with many people. Because I really, really, really dont.
You haven't put much out. There was more info in your OP about how many relationships you've been in then there was details about how you feel about it all. Except that you are optimistic about relationships you get into initially, it seems.
I mean, dude, I understand the pain of being in a relationship you just realized isn't going to go anywhere and procrastinating the breakup for all sorts of reasons. His post is just sarcastic because this really does come off as kind of like you're just saying you've had a ton of GF's while only being 21.
It's like the dick touching the toilet thread of yore. It was probably legit, but at the same time, it just sounded like a brag about penis size.
But yeah, you gotta hold back dude. Stop the relationships for a couple years or so. I think you'll like it better that way.
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I feel you OP that's the reason while I ended up my relationships around 2-3 months into it if I saw it going nowhere. It makes you feel like a dick when you're doing, it but hey it worked for me in the long run ^^.
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