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Contemplating Suicide - Page 5

Blogs > qzmpwxno
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AppleTart
Profile Blog Joined March 2010
United States1261 Posts
August 04 2010 06:34 GMT
#81
So you have very blatantly inconstant posts about yourself... I'm not going to waste my time helping you if I can't even trust you.
always tired -_-
ieatkids5
Profile Blog Joined September 2004
United States4628 Posts
August 04 2010 06:40 GMT
#82
On August 04 2010 15:15 Masamune wrote:
ieatkids5, don't trivialize his blog just because you feel your life or other peoples lives were/are "harder".

Maybe he's fixating on things that would seem minuscule to you, but it still bothers him as much as your problems did for you. Not everyone's the same and hopefully he'll find a way around his issues.

Even if this is a trollpost, who cares? I'm sure there are kids reading this who are feeling exactly what he's going through...

Let's pretend that what the OP wrote was actually happening to him, just to make conversation.

Trivializing? You could call it that. Because the 'real life' problems he has are trivial. They're nothing compared to what other people go through. They are trivial and they are miniscule. The real problem here, and you even said it, is that he's fixated on these things. His perspective, his thoughts, his views on these little problems are the true problem here. He's making these problems bigger than they should be, and overreacting to them in a negative way instead of finding the best way to deal with it.

And all the kids "who are feeling exactly what he's going through" reading this blog and my posts? Good. Now they can see how they're wrong, how seeing everything in a negative light is useless and only detrimental to yourself and those who you're close with. Yeah, I know my tone is harsh in these posts. All for the better. Sometimes a good kick back into reality is needed. Some people need to be told this way for the message to get through. And of course, there are people who aren't like this. The OP just didn't seem like one.

prototype.
Profile Blog Joined July 2009
Canada4206 Posts
August 04 2010 06:43 GMT
#83
Nice consistency in your blogs.

But if you're actually being honest about the whole suicidal thing, you should take a lesson from a blog you wrote about (Z)EffOrt.

http://www.teamliquid.net/blogs/viewblog.php?topic_id=129042

( ・´ー・`)
TuElite
Profile Blog Joined March 2010
Canada2123 Posts
August 04 2010 06:53 GMT
#84

And all the kids "who are feeling exactly what he's going through" reading this blog and my posts? Good. Now they can see how they're wrong, how seeing everything in a negative light is useless and only detrimental to yourself and those who you're close with. Yeah, I know my tone is harsh in these posts. All for the better. Sometimes a good kick back into reality is needed. Some people need to be told this way for the message to get through. And of course, there are people who aren't like this.


It can be munch more complicated then that. You said, seeing everything in a negative light is useless and only detrimental to yourself and those who you're close with. I agree. But for some people it's chemically impossible to think otherwise. OP is probably not diagnosed with bi-polaria or severe depression but you get the point.
Always Smile - Jung Nicole - Follow Nicole on Twitter @_911007 and me @TuElite
ccou
Profile Joined December 2008
United States681 Posts
August 04 2010 07:04 GMT
#85
On August 04 2010 15:40 ieatkids5 wrote:
Let's pretend that what the OP wrote was actually happening to him, just to make conversation.

Trivializing? You could call it that. Because the 'real life' problems he has are trivial. They're nothing compared to what other people go through. They are trivial and they are miniscule. The real problem here, and you even said it, is that he's fixated on these things. His perspective, his thoughts, his views on these little problems are the true problem here. He's making these problems bigger than they should be, and overreacting to them in a negative way instead of finding the best way to deal with it.

And all the kids "who are feeling exactly what he's going through" reading this blog and my posts? Good. Now they can see how they're wrong, how seeing everything in a negative light is useless and only detrimental to yourself and those who you're close with. Yeah, I know my tone is harsh in these posts. All for the better. Sometimes a good kick back into reality is needed. Some people need to be told this way for the message to get through. And of course, there are people who aren't like this. The OP just didn't seem like one.


Well, on the off-chance that the OP was only lying in the previous blog entry was completely truthful in this one, I'd rescind my original post if it hasn't been quoted so much already. Constructive sympathy has a much smaller chance of pushing someone towards destructive behavior.
Wake up Mr. B!
Masamune
Profile Joined January 2007
Canada3401 Posts
August 04 2010 07:09 GMT
#86
On August 04 2010 15:40 ieatkids5 wrote:
Show nested quote +
On August 04 2010 15:15 Masamune wrote:
ieatkids5, don't trivialize his blog just because you feel your life or other peoples lives were/are "harder".

Maybe he's fixating on things that would seem minuscule to you, but it still bothers him as much as your problems did for you. Not everyone's the same and hopefully he'll find a way around his issues.

Even if this is a trollpost, who cares? I'm sure there are kids reading this who are feeling exactly what he's going through...

Let's pretend that what the OP wrote was actually happening to him, just to make conversation.

Trivializing? You could call it that. Because the 'real life' problems he has are trivial. They're nothing compared to what other people go through. They are trivial and they are miniscule. The real problem here, and you even said it, is that he's fixated on these things. His perspective, his thoughts, his views on these little problems are the true problem here. He's making these problems bigger than they should be, and overreacting to them in a negative way instead of finding the best way to deal with it.

And all the kids "who are feeling exactly what he's going through" reading this blog and my posts? Good. Now they can see how they're wrong, how seeing everything in a negative light is useless and only detrimental to yourself and those who you're close with. Yeah, I know my tone is harsh in these posts. All for the better. Sometimes a good kick back into reality is needed. Some people need to be told this way for the message to get through. And of course, there are people who aren't like this. The OP just didn't seem like one.


There are always going to be people who have it worse. You can trivialize anything. Hey, that kid living in the ghettos of NYC, he may not have gotten any presents for Christmas, but at least he's not living in poverty-stricken Africa. And that kid in Africa? Hey at least he's not living in Africa with AIDS! And that kid in Africa with AIDS??? At least he still has family and is not living alone in Zaire with the Ebola virus!!

You can always make a situation sound better than it is, but I think it's more appropriate to look at things in perspective and relatively. I remember reading some guys blog here on TL who visited his family in South America. The rich mom's side were constantly working and depressed, and the poorer dad's side was happier, despite having a worse quality of life, financially. Things really need to be looked at from a proper angle because happiness is not the same for everyone.

With this guy, sure his problems may not be that big of a deal in comparison to other people but he's hurting just as much emotionally. We all have a different chemical make-up and some people are more prone to things like depression because of chemical imbalances in their brains etc. so I think we have treat everyone seriously, not matter what their issues are. I'm also sure many people who are depressed know that they have it better than other people but still fall into these "holes". A lot of the times it's genetic and they just can't help feeling like this. If it was as simple as just being put back into reality, many people wouldn't feel like this in the first place.

Maybe being harsher toned worked for you and possibly other people reading this blog, but there are those who it won't work for and only a different approach will help.
Ghardo
Profile Blog Joined September 2004
Germany1685 Posts
August 04 2010 07:38 GMT
#87
i shed a tear at baller's comments

dude you got all the advice you need in this thread and should clearly see what a stupid, rushed idea this is. just give it some time, first try to develop for the better, it will come to you, i'm sure.
hell, i just recently understood what it means to sit down on my arse for once and study seriously, and i'm 24, so please don't end your life. it's all a matter of emtional state, so bear with this one and there'll be a brighter one in the future.

17, don't be killed by your naivete!
Dance.
Profile Blog Joined July 2010
United States389 Posts
Last Edited: 2010-08-04 07:55:14
August 04 2010 07:50 GMT
#88
Meh, college is a mixed bag. Sure, I go to parties and shit and hook up with girls, but worrying for exams and studying gets old and stressful.

This guy is fucking bullshitting.

hey!! I haven't made a blog in more than a month, just because I haven't had too much to talk about. But finally I seem to have started digging myself out of my self-inflicted holes, and so here I am today.

This post is going to be about a topic which gets a lot of attention on TL: girls and love.

So, to start off, I finished my junior (3rd year of college) and am getting ready for my senior year and the real world. But the past 3 years have been hectic. I got bad grades throughout my college years, and at one point was close to being dismissed because of my poor gpa. I took a summer course to remediate myself this summer, and am about to get an A in the class, which would bring up my average to over a 2.0 (I know, absolutely terrible). But all seems to be alright again. I finally seem to have developed good study habits and concentration but, most importantly, I seem to have conjured up a state of peace of mind and self-worth. And it all started with a girl.


-What ever the fuck his name is.

I dont know which is bullshit and which is not, but both is pretty fucking pathetic.
It is what it is...
PrinceXizor
Profile Blog Joined April 2010
United States17713 Posts
August 04 2010 07:59 GMT
#89
Okay here you go kid: Go to the gym after school mon, wed, fri for 2 hours, do some cardio and some wrist curls, get home, get some water, sit down in front of your computer and go at SC2 for 3 hours, on Tues/Thurs spend 4 hours on SC2 after school. Then after SC2 get your school work done, get some more water, and spend an hour watching replays of SC2, then go to bed. Gets you in shape, gets your parents off of you for that, you get to spend alot of time on SC2, and you still work toward getting to college. you'll spend 35-40 hours on school, 6 hours at the gym, 21 hours on SC2. and that also gives you about 10 and a half hour a week day to sleep. and weekends off.
LonelyMargarita
Profile Blog Joined August 2007
1845 Posts
August 04 2010 08:21 GMT
#90
On August 04 2010 12:34 Elegy wrote:

You have no fucking idea what this will do the people around you and to your family. You think you don't have friends? You think people won't care? You bet your ass they will, they'll think of it every day that you aren't in class.


Caring about someone and wanting someone to not kill himself are 2 entirely different things. Of course people will feel bad when someone commits suicide - but to actually care enough about someone to make his life better is another thing altogether. If people actually cared about someone, they would be there for him even if they didn't think he was suicidal. If they cared about him, they would have been thinking of him every day he WAS in class. Legitimately caring about someone else is selfless - something not many people can do. Caring when someone dies is selfish - at that point they're sad about their own loss, not his.

And to the OP: Yes, the vast majority of people are very disingenuous, but not everyone. It's obviously going to be much worse when you're younger. If everyone was the same person for their whole life that they were at 17, the world would be a horrible, horrible place. And quite frankly, you don't want to go to an Ivy League school if you want to be more social - the social structure at slightly lower, top-tier schools will be better and more representative of the actual population. Living in a dorm will force you into an environment with every type of person, and pretty much ensure you'll meet a couple people you're compatible with.

Start lifting weights and eating right. There was pretty young diabetic at my old gym - maybe 20 years old. After a couple years, not only was he very thin, but among the strongest people there. He could bench almost twice his weight - better than me, and certainly better than 99% the population. Being diabetic doesn't mean you have to be overweight - just be careful about what you eat and avoid supplements other than protein. If you start now, you'll easily be 150 in a couple years, and you'll feel a ton better all along the way.
I <3 서지훈
LonelyMargarita
Profile Blog Joined August 2007
1845 Posts
August 04 2010 08:30 GMT
#91
On August 04 2010 16:09 Masamune wrote:
Show nested quote +
On August 04 2010 15:40 ieatkids5 wrote:
On August 04 2010 15:15 Masamune wrote:
ieatkids5, don't trivialize his blog just because you feel your life or other peoples lives were/are "harder".

Maybe he's fixating on things that would seem minuscule to you, but it still bothers him as much as your problems did for you. Not everyone's the same and hopefully he'll find a way around his issues.

Even if this is a trollpost, who cares? I'm sure there are kids reading this who are feeling exactly what he's going through...

Let's pretend that what the OP wrote was actually happening to him, just to make conversation.

Trivializing? You could call it that. Because the 'real life' problems he has are trivial. They're nothing compared to what other people go through. They are trivial and they are miniscule. The real problem here, and you even said it, is that he's fixated on these things. His perspective, his thoughts, his views on these little problems are the true problem here. He's making these problems bigger than they should be, and overreacting to them in a negative way instead of finding the best way to deal with it.

And all the kids "who are feeling exactly what he's going through" reading this blog and my posts? Good. Now they can see how they're wrong, how seeing everything in a negative light is useless and only detrimental to yourself and those who you're close with. Yeah, I know my tone is harsh in these posts. All for the better. Sometimes a good kick back into reality is needed. Some people need to be told this way for the message to get through. And of course, there are people who aren't like this. The OP just didn't seem like one.


There are always going to be people who have it worse. You can trivialize anything. Hey, that kid living in the ghettos of NYC, he may not have gotten any presents for Christmas, but at least he's not living in poverty-stricken Africa. And that kid in Africa? Hey at least he's not living in Africa with AIDS! And that kid in Africa with AIDS??? At least he still has family and is not living alone in Zaire with the Ebola virus!!

You can always make a situation sound better than it is, but I think it's more appropriate to look at things in perspective and relatively. I remember reading some guys blog here on TL who visited his family in South America. The rich mom's side were constantly working and depressed, and the poorer dad's side was happier, despite having a worse quality of life, financially. Things really need to be looked at from a proper angle because happiness is not the same for everyone.

With this guy, sure his problems may not be that big of a deal in comparison to other people but he's hurting just as much emotionally. We all have a different chemical make-up and some people are more prone to things like depression because of chemical imbalances in their brains etc. so I think we have treat everyone seriously, not matter what their issues are. I'm also sure many people who are depressed know that they have it better than other people but still fall into these "holes". A lot of the times it's genetic and they just can't help feeling like this. If it was as simple as just being put back into reality, many people wouldn't feel like this in the first place.

Maybe being harsher toned worked for you and possibly other people reading this blog, but there are those who it won't work for and only a different approach will help.


Yes. Emotions are relative, not absolute. They are highly based on expectations and have little to do with actual wealth or measurable achievement. People who honestly believe that living in a wealthier country has much to do with being happier have no idea what they are talking about.
I <3 서지훈
Laerties
Profile Blog Joined March 2010
United States361 Posts
August 04 2010 08:50 GMT
#92
I think the most important thing that you are lacking is pride in yourself. While you should work on improving your flaws, you should always be proud of who you are despite what anyone may think.
Happiness is when what you think, what you say, and what you do are in harmony.
DoctorHelvetica
Profile Blog Joined July 2008
United States15034 Posts
August 04 2010 08:58 GMT
#93
Perfectionism is a chore. I got an 1830 on the SAT and I know I could have done better if I studied. Stop looking at what you could have done, should have done, or whatever and start looking on how you can make your immediate life better. Focus on what you appreciate and how to make that more apparent.

At the end of the day, it doesn't matter if you went to Princeton or ITT Tech. It's the relationships you have and the positivity YOU make out of life that will leave you satisfied.

When I was a cocky freshman in highschool I was certain I'd end up at a high level university. I was an arrogant slacker, I never studied math and it hurt me a lot on the SAT. I barely passed all of my math classes, I slept through all of them. I got mediocre grades and now I'm going to Jr. College working on a transfer to become a nurse. I'll probably make six figures if I make it through and become an NP or CRNA. And you think you can't get a decent job if you don't go to a place like Harvard? Are you fucking kidding?

As far as sociophobia I can understand. I even left TL because my addiction to the internet and starcraft was ruining my life. For the better part of my teenage life I walled myself off from people and then blamed them for ignoring me. I left TL, got off my ass, and repaired the relationships I have lost. I stopped feeling sorry for myself and started searching for a reason to exist. I thought about killing myself and now the idea isn't even a blip on my radar. The only thing I worry about is reverting back into the pathetic sack of shit I used to be.

I just got a call from a doctor that said I'm having liver problems because I'm overweight. 6'2" and 242 lb. I'm on a good diet, exercising regularly, and now working hard to make something of my life. You can do it too. Don't give in and really look at all the problems in your life. People treating you like shit? Is that really because all people are jerks or is it something you're doing? I found out in a hurry that all the people I thought were assholes were really just responding naturally to the way I carried myself.

If you sit around whining waiting for life's meaning to smack you in the ass you aren't going anywhere. That's the truth.
RIP Aaliyah
Amnesia
Profile Blog Joined September 2009
United States3818 Posts
August 04 2010 10:02 GMT
#94
Bro what happens in high school stays in high school.

College is a totally new place for you to change yourself. You're fat? Lose pounds. I was ~170 in high school, decided to lose weight and now I am around 135. I am also 5'7/8 ish.

Suicide is the stupidest thing you could do.
intrudor
Profile Blog Joined December 2009
Canada446 Posts
August 04 2010 11:04 GMT
#95
"Life is sacred, it is the supreme value to which all other values are subordinate."
— Albert Einstein
USER MIGHT BE WARNED FOR THIS COMMENT
Epicfailguy
Profile Blog Joined August 2007
Norway893 Posts
August 04 2010 11:10 GMT
#96
Meh, I was suicidal a few months ago, but I just ended up drinking a lot, and now I've met a girl.
Life feels great again, I'm trying to stop drinking every day, and I don't smoke as much as I used too..I'm just scared of how empty it'll feel when/if I lose her.

Moral of the story: even if you suck ass, hang in there...good things come for those who wait.
chaoser
Profile Blog Joined November 2008
United States5541 Posts
August 04 2010 12:36 GMT
#97
Can we get it checked out if he's lying or not about what he said?

Previous blog:

On June 28 2010 02:55 qzmpwxno wrote:
So, to start off, I finished my junior (3rd year of college) and am getting ready for my senior year and the real world. But the past 3 years have been hectic. I got bad grades throughout my college years, and at one point was close to being dismissed because of my poor gpa. I took a summer course to remediate myself this summer, and am about to get an A in the class, which would bring up my average to over a 2.0 (I know, absolutely terrible).


On this post:

On August 04 2010 11:43 qzmpwxno wrote:
OK so so start off...Academics. I'm a high school junior and will be a senior this fall. I failed AP English this year thanks to my stubborn teacher (who should retire BTW). I took the SAT and prepared my ass off for it, even though I only got a 1970 (I was distracted the whole time by a hot girl in the front row). In my freshman year I had hopes of going to an Ivy League, but now all my academic dreams have been crushed.


If he's lying, that's pretty fucked up man, suicide ain't nothing to joke about/lie about. I didn't really care in Dream)Xero's case cause fuck if, that's pretty pathetic that he's lying about getting a girl when he didn't but lying about suicide's way lower cause there's tons of people out there with suicidal tendencies as real problems.

if he's lying please, that's just messed up
Haven't you heard? I'm not an ex-progamer. I'm not a poker player. I'm not an admin of the site. I'm mother fucking Rekrul.
TheAntZ
Profile Blog Joined January 2009
Israel6248 Posts
August 04 2010 13:20 GMT
#98
On August 04 2010 21:36 chaoser wrote:
if he's lying please, that's just messed up


Hes quite obviously lying since theres no consistency between his blogs, hes like a different person in his other blog
Im not sure why this guy isnt banned yet, theres been a precedent set for this with xearo's ban
43084 | Honeybadger: "So july, you're in the GSL finals. How do you feel?!" ~ July: "HUNGRY."
Whole
Profile Blog Joined May 2010
United States6046 Posts
August 04 2010 16:24 GMT
#99
u gotta skate
ieatkids5
Profile Blog Joined September 2004
United States4628 Posts
August 04 2010 17:41 GMT
#100
On August 04 2010 16:09 Masamune wrote:
Show nested quote +
On August 04 2010 15:40 ieatkids5 wrote:
On August 04 2010 15:15 Masamune wrote:
ieatkids5, don't trivialize his blog just because you feel your life or other peoples lives were/are "harder".

Maybe he's fixating on things that would seem minuscule to you, but it still bothers him as much as your problems did for you. Not everyone's the same and hopefully he'll find a way around his issues.

Even if this is a trollpost, who cares? I'm sure there are kids reading this who are feeling exactly what he's going through...

Let's pretend that what the OP wrote was actually happening to him, just to make conversation.

Trivializing? You could call it that. Because the 'real life' problems he has are trivial. They're nothing compared to what other people go through. They are trivial and they are miniscule. The real problem here, and you even said it, is that he's fixated on these things. His perspective, his thoughts, his views on these little problems are the true problem here. He's making these problems bigger than they should be, and overreacting to them in a negative way instead of finding the best way to deal with it.

And all the kids "who are feeling exactly what he's going through" reading this blog and my posts? Good. Now they can see how they're wrong, how seeing everything in a negative light is useless and only detrimental to yourself and those who you're close with. Yeah, I know my tone is harsh in these posts. All for the better. Sometimes a good kick back into reality is needed. Some people need to be told this way for the message to get through. And of course, there are people who aren't like this. The OP just didn't seem like one.


There are always going to be people who have it worse. You can trivialize anything. Hey, that kid living in the ghettos of NYC, he may not have gotten any presents for Christmas, but at least he's not living in poverty-stricken Africa. And that kid in Africa? Hey at least he's not living in Africa with AIDS! And that kid in Africa with AIDS??? At least he still has family and is not living alone in Zaire with the Ebola virus!!

You can always make a situation sound better than it is, but I think it's more appropriate to look at things in perspective and relatively. I remember reading some guys blog here on TL who visited his family in South America. The rich mom's side were constantly working and depressed, and the poorer dad's side was happier, despite having a worse quality of life, financially. Things really need to be looked at from a proper angle because happiness is not the same for everyone.

With this guy, sure his problems may not be that big of a deal in comparison to other people but he's hurting just as much emotionally. We all have a different chemical make-up and some people are more prone to things like depression because of chemical imbalances in their brains etc. so I think we have treat everyone seriously, not matter what their issues are. I'm also sure many people who are depressed know that they have it better than other people but still fall into these "holes". A lot of the times it's genetic and they just can't help feeling like this. If it was as simple as just being put back into reality, many people wouldn't feel like this in the first place.

Maybe being harsher toned worked for you and possibly other people reading this blog, but there are those who it won't work for and only a different approach will help.

I've come to understand that we have different viewpoints and they can't be reconciled.

I believe that there are stupid/trivial problems. Especially what the OP is going through. Then there are problems that are serious, like that stuff you said. The poor kid in the ghetto, people in third world countries. Their problems are serious. And yes, the kid in Africa should be looking at his situation with logic. He should be happy that he doesn't have it worse. Everyone should think like that. Everyone should see their situation through a positive lens and approach their problems with reason. That doesn't mean be satisfied with the current situation. But don't fucking despair and become a useless member of society. Work your way out of that situation, or make the best of it if you can't.

If I'm diagnosed with a terminal disease and I have one month left to live, it'd be perfectly reasonable for me to become depressed. Maybe it'd be common or reasonable for me to never get over it either, and die an unhappy death. But why do that when there is a better alternative? Understand that I have one month to live. Understand that there is nothing I can do about that fact. Understand that despairing will only make those precious few moments I have left to live worse. Therefore, I should do what I can to be happy in those last few moments. There is no reason to not view your situation with a positive outlook.

The OP has it much better than the hypothetical situation above. His problem can be fixed if he doesn't sit there and vegetate. OP needs to understand that: here is a situation; he is unhappy in this situation; work to get out of it; see things in a positive light during that entire process (and after).

Oh, and that family you mentioned with one side being rich/unhappy, other side being poor/happy. Yes, everyone's happiness is unique. The poor/happy side seems fine. Rich/unhappy side needs to do some thinking. Is working so hard to get more money really going to make you happy? Would you be happier if you worked less and had less money? Clearly they're not enjoying their work. Something needs to change here. Either reassess what they truly should be doing to enjoy life, or learn to like their work (pretty damn difficult).

Anyways, yes, I agree that for some people, advice from someone like me won't work. And for others, showing sympathy becomes like a drug and they come back for more without ever doing anything to fix their way of thinking. You can't cure someone's depression without truly understanding them - so it's really difficult to do it in a post. In the end, if my ideas about how someone approaches life manages to make their life a bit better, then I'll be satisfied.

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