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About Socialising - Page 5

Blogs > XiaoJoyce-
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Bereft
Profile Blog Joined February 2010
United States1007 Posts
July 06 2010 21:54 GMT
#81
On July 07 2010 00:31 TheAntZ wrote:
Show nested quote +
On July 07 2010 00:28 niteReloaded wrote:
TheAntZ, you're creeping me out. I know you're joking and tryin to make her feel better, but it just feels over the top.


nite I think if u read my last post again you'd realize I dont want to be creepy, a full commitments what I'm, thinkin of.


You wouldn't get this from any other guy!
December12345
Profile Joined July 2010
40 Posts
July 06 2010 21:56 GMT
#82
Zia, is that you?
darmousseh
Profile Blog Joined May 2010
United States3437 Posts
July 06 2010 22:22 GMT
#83
My family hosted a foreign exchange student from japan twice and both times they were in for a culture shock. In japan, I believe, that touching is a very intimate thing, however my mother is the kind of person to hug everyone she sees so right when he got to our house she hugged him right away. Also, he was very quiet at first (not sure if it was nerves), but eventually over a month he warmed up to everyone and got used to the way we lived.

As for long term integration, I coached a high school kid who was from korea. When he first came he was very quiet and humble, but as time went on, after 2 years or so, he was acting just like everyone else in high school. Loud and comical.


A lot of outsiders misunderstand american culture and even insiders too. People here see self-confidence as a huge personality trait and to not have it, or to even show that you don't have it is a sign of weakness. This is true for both boys and girls but definitely more so for guys. The number one trait in an interview is self-confidence and passion.

At the same time, americans care deeply for each other once they get to know each other. Personally, in middle school I was one of those kids that didn't have too many friends. The way I found to get out of it was to laugh when others laugh (even if they are laughing at you) and to stand up for yourself. As long as you don't make a big deal out of things, most people will think you are cool.
Developer for http://mtgfiddle.com
n.DieJokes
Profile Blog Joined November 2008
United States3443 Posts
Last Edited: 2010-07-06 23:14:40
July 06 2010 23:13 GMT
#84
On July 07 2010 04:18 Hawk wrote:
Show nested quote +
On July 07 2010 04:00 n.DieJokes wrote:
On July 07 2010 03:46 Hawk wrote:
Reading it to the class is fine as long as the teacher didn't say before hand 'what you write will be private' and change his/her mind when they read the OP's thing.

It's kind of expected of any good teacher, really. You need examples of good and bad writing, what works and what doesn't. Criticism ain't the same as shitting on someone for giggles.

You don't believe in any level of Student-Teacher trust? There are thousands of examples of shitty essays online and in teaching books, you don't need to break down one of your own students to show an example of bad writing. It sounds purely malicious to me


Again, there's a big difference between criticism and shitting on someone for the sake of doing so. If you can't handle a professional telling you that your essay isn't as great as your mommy told you, then you're gonna get hammered in the real world.

That has absolutely nothing to do with student-teacher relationship. That's the same as your teacher telling you that you're wrong when you raise your hand. Breaching the trust would be like your teacher instructing you to keep a journal that he/she will not share with classmates and holding it up in front of the class and calling you a retard a week later.

He can share it with just you! Like a normal teacher! He can grade your paper, write comments and return it to you with a poor grade and some reasons! He doesn't have to read it to the whole class! You're totally misconstruing everything I say
Edit: Also, I'm sorry for destroying this blog. I didn't think this would happen...
MyLove + Your Love= Supa Love
love1another
Profile Blog Joined December 2009
United States1844 Posts
July 06 2010 23:15 GMT
#85
What the hell happened to this blog... How did this turn into a "compare education systems!" thread?
"I'm learning more and more that TL isn't the place to go for advice outside of anything you need in college. It's like you guys just make up your own fantasy world shit and post it as if you've done it." - Chill
]343[
Profile Blog Joined May 2008
United States10328 Posts
July 07 2010 00:03 GMT
#86
On July 07 2010 06:13 Exteray wrote:
Show nested quote +
On July 07 2010 01:20 baller wrote:
据已真正决定使用甚至想要做看起来更像人

baller 你用的翻译机也太差劲了


LOL I don't even understand his post

anyway yeah I think Chinese culture just emphasizes education a lot more than American culture in general. And (math/science-wise, anyways) Chinese education is at a much faster pace, and students are expected to do much harder problems.

anyway too much derailing hahaha xiaojoyce's cute post --> AMERICA VS CHINA SHOWDOWN
Writer
endy
Profile Blog Joined May 2009
Switzerland8970 Posts
Last Edited: 2010-07-07 02:21:28
July 07 2010 02:20 GMT
#87
+ Show Spoiler +
On July 07 2010 04:19 Orlandu wrote:
Show nested quote +
On July 07 2010 03:01 Xeris wrote:
On July 07 2010 02:14 n.DieJokes wrote:
On July 07 2010 00:45 Xeris wrote:
On July 06 2010 23:42 n.DieJokes wrote:
On July 06 2010 20:06 XiaoJoyce- wrote:
One day I am so upset during composition writing I wrote about my feelings. Teacher find it ridiculous and read my writing to every1. I got condemed ever since

This teacher is a dick, I can't believe someone would do that. At my school they would instantly lose their job


This is pretty standard in Chinese culture. At my best friend's middle school in China, the teacher would throw bad grades on the floor and make the kids go pick them up off the floor in front of the rest of the class. Chinese education is very demanding, in America kids are way too soft and get babied by everyone.

Our kids wouldn't be as dumb if we had a humiliation-based way of punishing people for incompetence the way China does. Think you'd be motivated to get a good grade on a test if you knew getting a bad grade meant humiliation? You bet.

Thats bullshit, if I thought a teacher would humiliate me when I did poorly I would tune out his opinion and his class. The classes I've tried my hardest in are the ones where I liked and respected the teacher. I don't know whats warped your perception in this way but education isn't for everyone, not every student should be pushed and shoved and kicked into doing well in school. There are other things in life and it's very a stressful and unhealthy experience for the Chinese kids I've met who are pushed in this way.

Obviously in this case it didn't do XiaoJoyce any good, he made her feel embarrassed and ashamed for trusting him and sharing her feelings. Tell me how it breaking her self-confidence and aleinating her from her classmates promoted her intellectual growth.


Obviously nothing is good for everybody. But there is a reason why the education in places like China is miles ahead of the US. This is one of the reasons. I don't particularly agree with the concept of public humiliation, but at the same time if I had to choose between that and a soft American education, I'd choose the former.

I work at my high school, I deal with education every day nd the HS I work at is one of the highest rated public schools in California. It's shocking to me how little a lot of the kids know, many of the 10th and 11th graders I work with can't write a coherent essay. Almost everyone is failing geometry and algebra 2. A big part of the reason for our failure to educate is because we don't promote a rigorous enough curriculum and students aren't pushed hard enough.

Again, this isn't the case for everyone. If I was publicly humiliated, I might shut down and stop caring, but then again it might motivate me even more, who knows. Just because many Chinese students aren't 'free thinking' in the way that American students are doesn't mean it's bad. There is no universal law that says our Western notions of freedom of thought and expression are fundamentally better than other modes of thought. All the Chinese people I know (and I know a lot, my best friend is Chinese, my ex gf was Chinese, I went to UCSD which has 99% asians...) have the capacity for deep contemplation of different things, etc. They're not really robotic, except in stuff that pertains to China (like their views on Tibet, from my experience). There really is not much that separates my Chinese friends from my other friends except that all my Chinese friends are much more disciplined, have a much better work ethic, and have a much more solid foundation of education.


You should really try living in China for awhile, especially on a university campus if you can, and spend a lot of time communicating with the students. You'll quickly realize many of the strengths and flaws in both your own and their education systems. Chinese education is extremely rigorous, but by no means is it better, and most intelligent Chinese will be quick to point out the flaws in their own education system.

For example, as has been pointed out, many Chinese are not particularly adept at creative thinking. There are a lot of reasons for this. Did you know that in China, papers (such as reports, essays, any of that sort of thing) are often not taken seriously at all, to the point where most students download papers from the internet or literally turn in the exact same papers as their classmates? What's more, this is perfectly acceptable and common even from the hardest working students. The 10th and 11th graders you spoke of may not be able to write coherent essays, but many Chinese are certainly not able to do any better.

Not only that, but you would be quite surprised at the other forms of cheating that go on in China. It's not uncommon at all for someone to walk into an exam and take it for their friend (especially in English exams), or for people to just blatantly cheat by talking or looking at materials during the exam. You can even often buy the answers ahead of time to many exams, such as the CET-4 or CET-6, as well as others. The list goes on and on. While the 高考,or the infamous high school exam that students take to get into a university, is particularly difficult and taken very seriously, afterwards things change a bit. Many students will study very hard and take them seriously still, but cheating still happens quite a lot.

You'll also quickly find that many students tend to specialize in particular areas (such as some kind of math or science), and be quite ignorant in multiple other areas. In fact, Chinese are particularly poor in their knowledge of the rest of the world. Americans may have the stereotype for being the most ignorant about the rest of the world, but anyone who's lived abroad in certain countries can tell you that is very far from being the truth. You would be amazed at the stereotypes you can hear about many different countries when speaking with the average Chinese, and usually what they say is exactly the same (literally word-for-word), even when communicating with people from very different parts of the country. When you engage in any sort of further discussions with most people regarding their respective countries, most people will meet you with confused faces. While that's not a problem unique to the Chinese, they are quite fond of their stereotypes, often more so than those in the West. That being said however, they are very eager to learn more.

Chinese are no doubt extremely hard-working in most aspects of their life at school. Many of them go to the classroom to study in silence for hours at a time, every day. As has been discussed, most Chinese are pushed very hard to do well on standardized tests. The problem is that scoring well on standardized tests says very little about how intelligent or how well-educated you are. Many Chinese are able to score well on tests, but often without really even understanding the material. They have become quite good at learning how to do well on tests without actually knowing the material well, and there are many organizations in China designed to improve test scores that further this problem. It is definitely true that many of them do severely lack critical thinking skills, and it's a problem that is not being addressed.

You're basing much of what you're saying off of Chinese that have ventured outside of China. Chinese that leave China, even for a short time, are forever changed, and cannot be accurately compared to those who have not. Opening up your mind is something that is difficult to reverse, and it does have a very large effect on overseas Chinese.

There are a lot of stereotypes that people in the West believe about China and Asia in general, and their education is one of those things. There are many things about Chinese education that you just won't know or even understand until you experience it first-hand. Most overseas Chinese have no idea either, despite how much they may claim to know, unless they actually went to high school or university in China. There are DEFINITELY strengths in the Chinese education system, and there are most DEFINITELY some very obvious flaws as well. It's quite an interesting thing, and experiencing it will really open up your eyes and make you realize that Western education, and specifically American education, while flawed as well, is nowhere near as bad as what many would have you believe.


I agree with every single point of this post.
ॐ
R2D2C3PO
Profile Blog Joined July 2010
Canada105 Posts
Last Edited: 2010-07-07 02:38:57
July 07 2010 02:37 GMT
#88
On July 06 2010 20:06 XiaoJoyce- wrote:

One day I am so upset during composition writing I wrote about my feelings. Teacher find it ridiculous and read my writing to every1. I got condemed ever since



lol

my friend wrote this for peer evaluation for data management project and the teacher read it to every one of his classes, everyone laughed at him, he sent what he wrote to me:

From the moment he stood up and began to walk towards the computer, I was shocked by his nervousness that he was trying to bury deep in his heart. Although he appeared to be calm and relaxed because he had put tears and sweats through days and nights to prepare for this huge task, inside him, it was like a volcano ready to erupt. Although Ares had not been in Canada long enough to have the best English communication skills, he stood up like a real man and presented his research logically.



TheAntZ
Profile Blog Joined January 2009
Israel6248 Posts
Last Edited: 2010-07-07 03:38:18
July 07 2010 03:37 GMT
#89
On July 07 2010 06:37 tec27 wrote:
Show nested quote +
On July 07 2010 06:21 mOnion wrote:
this thread has derailed so hard its not even on another rail. we're like traveling in space bubbles now its so far off.

It got TheAntz to stop being creepy as fuck though. Mission accomplished.


On July 07 2010 06:46 Xeris wrote:
Show nested quote +
On July 07 2010 06:37 tec27 wrote:
On July 07 2010 06:21 mOnion wrote:
this thread has derailed so hard its not even on another rail. we're like traveling in space bubbles now its so far off.

It got TheAntz to stop being creepy as fuck though. Mission accomplished.


Agreed. If the blog has turned from mindless flirting with a girl (WHOA GIRL ON TL GOGO CHARM PATROL) to an interesting discussion on education, I don't see how it could be bad.


Actually thats not what caused me to stop, but ok. You guys are seriously strangers to love if you dont get my posts. You wouldnt think it was creepy if you knew the rules. She knows them, and so do I.
43084 | Honeybadger: "So july, you're in the GSL finals. How do you feel?!" ~ July: "HUNGRY."
Risen
Profile Blog Joined March 2010
United States7927 Posts
Last Edited: 2010-07-07 04:20:46
July 07 2010 04:17 GMT
#90
On July 07 2010 03:53 Chill wrote:
Show nested quote +
On July 07 2010 03:32 Xeris wrote:
On July 07 2010 03:05 Chill wrote:
On July 07 2010 03:01 Xeris wrote:
On July 07 2010 02:14 n.DieJokes wrote:
On July 07 2010 00:45 Xeris wrote:
On July 06 2010 23:42 n.DieJokes wrote:
On July 06 2010 20:06 XiaoJoyce- wrote:
One day I am so upset during composition writing I wrote about my feelings. Teacher find it ridiculous and read my writing to every1. I got condemed ever since

This teacher is a dick, I can't believe someone would do that. At my school they would instantly lose their job


This is pretty standard in Chinese culture. At my best friend's middle school in China, the teacher would throw bad grades on the floor and make the kids go pick them up off the floor in front of the rest of the class. Chinese education is very demanding, in America kids are way too soft and get babied by everyone.

Our kids wouldn't be as dumb if we had a humiliation-based way of punishing people for incompetence the way China does. Think you'd be motivated to get a good grade on a test if you knew getting a bad grade meant humiliation? You bet.

Thats bullshit, if I thought a teacher would humiliate me when I did poorly I would tune out his opinion and his class. The classes I've tried my hardest in are the ones where I liked and respected the teacher. I don't know whats warped your perception in this way but education isn't for everyone, not every student should be pushed and shoved and kicked into doing well in school. There are other things in life and it's very a stressful and unhealthy experience for the Chinese kids I've met who are pushed in this way.

Obviously in this case it didn't do XiaoJoyce any good, he made her feel embarrassed and ashamed for trusting him and sharing her feelings. Tell me how it breaking her self-confidence and aleinating her from her classmates promoted her intellectual growth.


Obviously nothing is good for everybody. But there is a reason why the education in places like China is miles ahead of the US.

Can I ask what you are basing this on?


http://www.theglobalist.com/storyid.aspx?StoryId=5264

http://www.examiner.com/x-423-Colorado-Education-Examiner~y2008m7d3-Is-the-US-falling-behind-the-world

http://www.saratogafalcon.org/content/us-education-falling-behind-those-other-countries

I figured this was pretty much generally accepted that elementary - middle - high school in the USA was horrible compared to many other countries.


First article - the main discussion is China's diligent students. Focuses on how hard they work because doing well in the standardized tests is a way into a good life. It mentions a few examples of western schools shifting policies to emulate China's "there is only one answer" policies. It goes on to show that there are problems with the Chinese system and that they lead to students who crush standardized tests but have little critical thinking skills.

Second article - I don't even know what this is. It's a quote from one man and ties it into some documentary about two students? Ok, the original source is from the Aspen Institute. A brief look around their website doesn't really explain what they do outside of "preparing people for" and "raising awareness." It's probably legit I just don't know what credentials they have to write this article. Reading the original article here, doesn't really objectively address anything.

Third article - Good article.

I don't get the feeling from reading these three articles that 'education in places like China is miles ahead of the US.' I get the feeling that they have different values taught from them and that the average Chinese student is many times more diligent than even the top American students.


And this is why, in almost every case, I love Chill's posts.

Edit: On-topic (or at least the topic this blog has now moved to)

The poster who said self-confidence is everything in America has the right of it. We are focused on Credentials, not Competence. (capitalized for emphasis)
Pufftrees Everyday>its like a rifter that just used X-Factor/Liquid'Nony: I hope no one lip read XD/Holyflare>it's like policy lynching but better/Resident Los Angeles bachelor
Maero
Profile Joined December 2007
349 Posts
July 07 2010 04:44 GMT
#91
On July 07 2010 12:37 TheAntZ wrote:
Show nested quote +
On July 07 2010 06:37 tec27 wrote:
On July 07 2010 06:21 mOnion wrote:
this thread has derailed so hard its not even on another rail. we're like traveling in space bubbles now its so far off.

It got TheAntz to stop being creepy as fuck though. Mission accomplished.


Show nested quote +
On July 07 2010 06:46 Xeris wrote:
On July 07 2010 06:37 tec27 wrote:
On July 07 2010 06:21 mOnion wrote:
this thread has derailed so hard its not even on another rail. we're like traveling in space bubbles now its so far off.

It got TheAntz to stop being creepy as fuck though. Mission accomplished.


Agreed. If the blog has turned from mindless flirting with a girl (WHOA GIRL ON TL GOGO CHARM PATROL) to an interesting discussion on education, I don't see how it could be bad.


Actually thats not what caused me to stop, but ok. You guys are seriously strangers to love if you dont get my posts. You wouldnt think it was creepy if you knew the rules. She knows them, and so do I.


I'm going to have to side with TheAntz on this one, he's been a class act the entire time.

You wouldn't get this from any other guy.
Niten
Profile Blog Joined October 2009
United States598 Posts
July 07 2010 05:11 GMT
#92
On July 06 2010 23:10 December12345 wrote:
I think your attempts to make friends is wrong, because you are not familiar with the culture in the US. Let me explain. (I've gone through a lot of trouble as well, being a first generation immigrant, so I feel your pain.)

In China, the accepted way to make friends is to be nice, to be kind and respectful, and with lots of personality and unique and cute things to say.

In the US, the way to make friends is also that, but there are 2 stages. Second stage is where you can be unique, cute, personable, etc.

But first stage, you need to show no weakness!! You don't even know them yet. Everyone will be mean to you. If you ask "who is the slut", the answer will be you "you are the slut". If you ask, "Why are black people stupid?" they will automatically say "Because you have no brain". You get the idea.


It's odd that you bring up nation's and how they make initially make friends. In Japan, for men, I think it has a lot to do with being part of the same group doing the same thing with the same interests... and being able to show a degree of skill or talent for whatever people are doing.

Anywho, it's a cute blog and I think we've all been there (not to discount ur experience).
Korra: "Ok, I know that I'm not good at emotions, but that's what Tenzin's gonna teach me, right? He's gonna teach me to be happy and gentle and spiritual, and the rest of that bullsh**t."
oddo123
Profile Joined October 2009
Iceland134 Posts
July 07 2010 05:28 GMT
#93
Secondary school is like that. Thinking back to my sec school days, the good looking ones have most friends and gf/bfs. If not good looking, will be bullied. It is a popularity contest, I find it immature but trust me the politics in working life is also quite stressful lol
Imma lead farmer, motherfucka!~ T: TLO P: InCa Z: Sen
XiaoJoyce-
Profile Blog Joined December 2009
China2908 Posts
July 07 2010 08:53 GMT
#94
On July 07 2010 14:28 oddo123 wrote:
Secondary school is like that. Thinking back to my sec school days, the good looking ones have most friends and gf/bfs. If not good looking, will be bullied. It is a popularity contest, I find it immature but trust me the politics in working life is also quite stressful lol


No...I can 100% garentee this is not true keke. Good looking people can have sad life in school too.
Pew! Pew! Chitty Chitty Bang Bang!
Mortician
Profile Blog Joined December 2008
Bulgaria2332 Posts
Last Edited: 2010-07-07 09:21:35
July 07 2010 09:20 GMT
#95
On July 06 2010 20:06 XiaoJoyce- wrote:

Ah, 1 thing in common, Guys talk about Girls. Girls talk about Guys.


There you go, talk about girls with the boys, and about boys with the girls

On July 07 2010 06:54 Bereft wrote:
Show nested quote +
On July 07 2010 00:31 TheAntZ wrote:
On July 07 2010 00:28 niteReloaded wrote:
TheAntZ, you're creeping me out. I know you're joking and tryin to make her feel better, but it just feels over the top.


nite I think if u read my last post again you'd realize I dont want to be creepy, a full commitments what I'm, thinkin of.


You wouldn't get this from any other guy!


I think he just wants to tell her how he's feeling, gotta make her understand
"If anything, the skill cap in sc2 is higher [than sc1] because there are a lot more things you can do at one given time. " darmousseh
n.DieJokes
Profile Blog Joined November 2008
United States3443 Posts
July 07 2010 19:02 GMT
#96
On July 07 2010 17:53 XiaoJoyce- wrote:
Show nested quote +
On July 07 2010 14:28 oddo123 wrote:
Secondary school is like that. Thinking back to my sec school days, the good looking ones have most friends and gf/bfs. If not good looking, will be bullied. It is a popularity contest, I find it immature but trust me the politics in working life is also quite stressful lol


No...I can 100% garentee this is not true keke. Good looking people can have sad life in school too.

A. You can guarantee good looking people have sad high school experiences
B. You had a sad high school experience
C. :3
MyLove + Your Love= Supa Love
Bill307
Profile Blog Joined October 2002
Canada9103 Posts
Last Edited: 2010-07-07 20:26:01
July 07 2010 20:10 GMT
#97
(edit: decided to derail TheAntZ's blog instead)


On topic: guys will randomly start to hate a girl because they were attracted to her at first, but became upset at her for some unimportant reason. Also, disliking the girl makes it easier for them to get over their attraction towards her. This is not the girl's fault in any way: it is simply the guys' way of dealing with their own problems.
T0fuuu
Profile Blog Joined May 2009
Australia2275 Posts
July 07 2010 21:30 GMT
#98
what? How can there even be a debate about whether the american system is better than the chinese. Its still ahead but everyone else in the develped world is also ahead of america. Ur university are the best though . No contest. chinese university sux bad. Compulsory socialism course and the same textbook memory game. Not the best way to teach Id say.
Urth
Profile Blog Joined November 2007
United States1250 Posts
July 07 2010 22:29 GMT
#99
On July 07 2010 17:53 XiaoJoyce- wrote:
Show nested quote +
On July 07 2010 14:28 oddo123 wrote:
Secondary school is like that. Thinking back to my sec school days, the good looking ones have most friends and gf/bfs. If not good looking, will be bullied. It is a popularity contest, I find it immature but trust me the politics in working life is also quite stressful lol


No...I can 100% garentee this is not true keke. Good looking people can have sad life in school too.

conceited
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