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I have a feeling my new roommate and I are not going to work well together.
By that I don't mean we will argue or dislike each other cause he's a great guy and I've had fun hanging out with him so far!
His name is Sam and he's Indian, and he's really nice. But the first thing I've noticed is that after just a few days here he is very free with the food that I've bought. That said, he just made a delicious dinner (with the chicken that I made the other night) and is very quick to offer it to me. It seems he's used to communal living. I'm not. Me and my other roommate have been by ourselves in our 3-bed for 5 months now and we're very accustomed to keeping things separate. This could take some getting used to, especially since I have no money, and what I buy is usually for myself.
He's so nice but his accent is so thick that I'm afraid to discuss it with him. His english is good but I fear miscommunication and I don't want to get started on the wrong foot with him. And maybe it's not such a bad thing, especially if he doesn't care that I don't really buy my fair share of the food stuff. I typically don't cause I don't have enough money.
What should I do?? Haha.
   
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This is totally normal. Try to be accommodating and see how it goes. If things really don't work out make a change but making a change now is just stupid. Give it time.
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especially if he doesn't care that I don't really buy my fair share of the food stuff. I typically don't cause I don't have enough money.
i dont get it. so you are saying he is free with 'your food' but your food is mostly not your food.
either that or you are explaining it wrong.
i'm indian, and ill say we are generally chill as fuck so if you bring up issues in a nice way he will likely not get mad.
likely. lol.
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JOEY DOESN'T SHARE FOOD!!
But really, just talk to the guy, he shouldn't get so angry tbh
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i believe he's saying "i don't have a lot to eat as it is" not "i starve"
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If he eats your food, why don't you eat his food?
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On June 30 2010 14:54 nath wrote: especially if he doesn't care that I don't really buy my fair share of the food stuff. I typically don't cause I don't have enough money.
i dont get it. so you are saying he is free with 'your food' but your food is mostly not your food.
either that or you are explaining it wrong.
i'm indian, and ill say we are generally chill as fuck so if you bring up issues in a nice way he will likely not get mad.
likely. lol. The food that I do buy, which is not that often, he has been free with.
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Situations like this only get worse the longer you wait on bringing them up. Just be honest and let him know. He'll understand, and if he continues eat his food and bring it up with the RA or something (I assume you live in a dorm).
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it doesnt sound like he lives in a dorm, probably an apartment on campus "Me and my other roommate have been by ourselves in our 3-bed for 5 months now..."
but eiserne, so if you dont buy food 'that often' does that mean you use food that you don't buy sometimes? or do you not just eat? or am i missing something? just to clarify.
either way just bring it up.
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You could either trying rolling with it and enjoy him cooking meals for you, or just bring it up to him and say you'd rather keep things separate, he'll understand. I've done both... I guess I prefer keeping things separate besides milk and such.
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dude if you're white just say white people don't share food and that you're not cool with it. blame your Culture not him
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this is the less conflictive of the roommates blogs ive seen.. i dont know just tell him you arent as used to share food? i dont really know why its a problem if you have good reasons then just straight up tell him... its still a bit confusing why its uncomfortable..
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Buy an iPad.
+ Show Spoiler [I had to do it, but seriously....] + My roommate and I lived communally you could say. It's important to set clear boundaries though and expect fair treatment. My roommate took a lot of advantage of me at first, not because he had any sort of malicious intent, but he just didn't think about things. It's important if it bothers you to talk to him and discuss your feelings, as lame as that sounds.
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Just subtly hint that you like it when he makes food. And then have delicious free food or confuse him with your iPhone whenever he makes a move for your food
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Jaedong would call you a cheapskate.
But seriously, just tell him with a smile on your face and it'll go through easily.
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Just talk to him about it.
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whats the issue? if anything id reccommend you all gather round for a food budget so you all survive rather than being stingy with your food and my food. xD
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"Hey, we have to figure something out about food, I'm on a really tight budget, so maybe it would be easiest to just keep our stuff seperate?"
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wow I don't understand what's the big deal yo. You come to ask for an advice from internet? Just tell him that you'd like both of you to take care of your own food. Tell him that you like to eat at your own time and it's easier to calculate your money that you eat just for yourself.
He is a roommate not someone who you want to share your life with.
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just tell him that normally you love sharing food, but recently you have less money, so you are unable to.
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I'm indian as well and I've never really had this problem with anyone else. Nor would I behave in the same way (but that's probably because I can't cook). Either way, just talk with him and set some boundaries.
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On June 30 2010 15:47 endy wrote:Could have been worse. Some roommates bring a bunch of black guys and suck each others cocks all night. Example : http://www.teamliquid.net/blogs/viewblog.php?topic_id=119744 (epic thread lol) Btw lol at TL search engine. I typed "gay roommate" => Did you mean 'Garimto' ? BTW this searching for gay roommate does lead to Garimto
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On June 30 2010 15:47 endy wrote:Could have been worse. Some roommates bring a bunch of black guys and suck each others cocks all night. Example : http://www.teamliquid.net/blogs/viewblog.php?topic_id=119744 (epic thread lol) Btw lol at TL search engine. I typed "gay roommate" => Did you mean 'Garimto' ?
Honestly that was the funniest / most disturbing blog I've ever read
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I don't see you having a problem
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Have a talk with him.
Unless the guy eats a lot, maybe it's better to try for communal living, as it's very used to do in most dorms. Sometimes when you're out of money he may have food and vice-versa, might work better for you.
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This is ridiculous. Where are your balls man? Just tell him if you have a problem with it.
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Don't freak man, if the dude cooks great food let him do it! hell I would pay him to do it.
My old room mate can not cook for shit and insist on cooking all the time. It really pisses me off.
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On June 30 2010 15:32 Orome wrote: "Hey, we have to figure something out about food, I'm on a really tight budget, so maybe it would be easiest to just keep our stuff seperate?"
This seems to be the best option so far, why over complicate something?
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Smash him with yo chello.
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On June 30 2010 17:24 hifriend wrote: This is ridiculous. Where are your balls man? Just tell him if you have a problem with it.
And do it in a nicer way then this post :p
But i would talk to him about it asap, the longer you wait the harder it gets. While it is not that big of a deal and im sure he will understand.
Edit: That blog about the gay roommate is sick and at the same time the most funny thing i ever read lol.
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On June 30 2010 15:47 endy wrote:Could have been worse. Some roommates bring a bunch of black guys and suck each others cocks all night. Example : http://www.teamliquid.net/blogs/viewblog.php?topic_id=119744 (epic thread lol) Btw lol at TL search engine. I typed "gay roommate" => Did you mean 'Garimto' ?
Why did I even read all of this I don't know
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On June 30 2010 15:08 jaw wrote: dude if you're white just say white people don't share food and that you're not cool with it. blame your Culture not him You're an idiot. I don't even know where to begin.
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^ Well, He's got a point, it is a culture thing.
I mean, who the hell just use food that BELONG to another person without asking him?
It's like using your shampoo and drink your coke. It's just not DONE.
If you really need to, then at least ask.
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just tell him to ask before he eats your shit. make him feel bad like you were saving that chicken for a romantic dinner with your mom
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Well, He's got a point, it is a culture thing.
well its also a culture thing to appreciate good food and shareing with people who live in the same house as you? example, ordering an pizza and cola for yourself when you know the entire house has been living on oatmeal for a week.
its not a good premise for good atmosphere and budding friends / neighbors.
as for the OP, you are insecure because you know its bad mannered, and while you should establish boarders i strongly advocate a mentality that very share and cooperate strategy.
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Yea I think an I pad is the way outta this one.
But really, this is like, WAY more than reasonable. Either deal with it , or just let him know very casually.
Or be an internet shut in!! You get it on your I phone right?
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On June 30 2010 19:09 haduken wrote: ^ Well, He's got a point, it is a culture thing.
I mean, who the hell just use food that BELONG to another person without asking him?
It's like using your shampoo and drink your coke. It's just not DONE.
If you really need to, then at least ask. It could very well be a culture thing. It could also be just an upbringing thing. It could be a million different things. In any case, bringing in race and being a racist about it isn't going to even begin to solve any problems.
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The solution is easy imo: Make up a plan for how much money you are prepared to spend on food per day (for just yourself) Buy food for this amount of money and allow room mate to use at will. (Since you apparantly enjoy his cooking). Use his food whenever you need it. If you buy the end of the month has spent no more money than your budget allowed then the sharing thing works out fine and you don't need an argument. Otherwise splt the fridge in two and keep things separate.
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I honestly don't see what the problem is. You barely have enough to eat and you are poor. He comes in and turns your crap into something delicious and actually supplies you with MORE food.
The point with the oatmeal is right as well. You don't just live with someone and watch them eat oatmeal for a month while you cook up sweet meals for yourself and eat it. It's good to share. Sure hes using some of your food, but you yourself said that you get more for your buck than he is getting.
You could just tell him to ask you before he uses your stuff. That way if you really really wanted to keep your food you can just tell him not to use it. Talking with him about it won't make him mad, a nice guy like him would understand, I mean if he were mean as hell then I would be scared to talk to him about it, or I know talking to him about it would have no effect.
As for the accent, well... there's nothing you can do about that, but I mean... in hindsight if you actually had a friend to room with you would never have been in this situation. Consider yourself lucky, some people get stuck with genuinely shitty roommates
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I've told my roommates 'i don't mind if you want some, just ask first' which works pretty well
What works really well is just putting your name/initials on the stuff you want for yourself. lots of people have the attitude that If it ain't got your name on it its fair game
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There's an app for this too
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maybe you should get a small fridge in your room. they are not too expensive and any food i didnt want to share would be secured in my room. the longer you wait the worse its gonna get. its really important though that when you tell him you dont look hostile.
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If he's a nice guy just act like a man and tell him what's up. If you're not cool with sharing food for the most part, just explain it. It's not like he's going to be upset he'll just say ok or ask why.
Or really just lighten up and enjoy a little less structure in your life
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On June 30 2010 14:57 Chesner wrote: JOEY DOESN'T SHARE FOOD!!
But really, just talk to the guy, he shouldn't get so angry tbh
wow wtf i just watched this episode
that's scary :o
on topic; i don't see a problem. new roommate buys food and cooks it for you, so what.
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throw your iphone in his face next time he takes your food, then you solve two problems.
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