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Let's Shame some Dispraises: A Victoria II AAR

Forum Index > General Games
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Caller
Profile Blog Joined September 2007
Poland8075 Posts
Last Edited: 2013-02-15 01:19:30
February 08 2013 02:10 GMT
#1
1. For Daimyo and Tosa (here)
2. Your Golds, give them Tosa
3. Dutch Ado About Nothing
4. Korea me softly with his dong


Let's Shame some Dispraises: A Victoria II AAR


This is a Victoria II After Action Report. This means I was bored enough to type up a fictional dialog to me playing a Paradox Game. I highly recommend you play this and similar Paradox games, and then bash your head for not understanding how stupid difficult they are.

Victoria II is a game that puts you into a country's shoes during the period 1836-1936. Here, you will attempt to industrialize and/or civilize (if you are non-European or American). You also, more likely than not, paint the map your color by annexing and conquering territories that have good resources. Uncivilized nations tend to be at a huge disadvantage to civilized ones. The nation I am playing is Tosa, a substate (basically, vassal) of Shogunate Japan.

I am playing with a Mod-New Nations Mod. I also reserve the right to mod in things as I see fit. But it's funnier when people die terribly, so I won't mod in cheats.

[image loading]


1. For Daimyo and Tosa


[image loading]

Tosa Domain. On the poorest island of Japan, the Yamauchi clan has consolidated its control. But the resources of this land are few and its population even fewer. It will take great strength and resolve, as well as opportunism, to make something of this.

[image loading]

The tidings of the West approach our isle. We have already began to modernize our country, but not to the extent that our neighbors to the north and west have. Shimazu, the last holdouts against the Shogun, rule the island of Kyushu as Satsuma Domain. Choshu Domain, ruled by the Mori, also has been fairly modernized. We need to change quickly.

[image loading]

The Daimyo looks at his finances. The administration of the country is very expensive, and to maintain an army costs further. He decides to disband the army to save income. The Shogun can hardly blame him-it was the Shogun's fault for giving him this poor land in the first place.

[image loading]

The Daimyo decides to encourage the growth of Buddhism in the territory. It is hoped that the monks will teach more and more people to read and write, increasing Tosa's ability to modernize.

[image loading]

Due to his location, the Daimyo is able to take advantage of some tidings of the West. While official Japanese policy is to kill any foreigner that lands outside of the designated trading port, a ship may stop every now and then on its way to richer lands. The Daimyo does not mind this sort of exchange of ideas.

[image loading]

The thought in his mind is to overthrow the Shogun. The Shogun may rule, but he has grown decadent, much like the Ashikaga before them. Like the unifiers of Nobunaga and Hideyoshi, the Tokugawa must be taken down so a new rule can reinvigorate Japan. But for now that is but a dream.

[image loading]

Meanwhile, tidings are brought of a similar island, whom has coronated a queen. Perhaps the long-ignored Japanese royalty may be what we need to reinvigorate Japan.

[image loading]

Elsewhere, the lands of China and Korea are rich and valuable. Alas, the might of the Chinese Empire is great, and the Koreans are mere puppets of the Manchu Emperor. Perhaps if Tosa is to grow strong, the riches of China and Korea could go to our coffers.

[image loading]

A disease strikes the people of Tosa. God. Damn. It. That's 20% of my entire population. FFFUUUUU.

[image loading]

It appears that the Chinese are now at war with a great foreign power. This is an opportunity that should be watched closely. If only we Tosa were free to interact with the world as we see fit.

[image loading]

After a while, the Daimyo recognizes that the foreigners who call themselves "Resupanne" have been frequently stopping by. Friendly relations have developed with these sailors, and the occasional Spaniard on an errand turns heads amongst the people. The Spanish bring glass beads to try and extort more valuable resources, but the denizens of Tosa prefer the tortillas they have instead. Combining them with the Ocotopi found often in the waters brings about a new fusion dish, the Tako.

[image loading]

Suddenly, the Shogun gives the call to arms. An armada of strange ships arrived, demanding entrance to the harbor. While the Shogun refused (as he should) the foreigners did not concede-they declared war!

[image loading]

The strange land they come from, "Amerika," is incredibly far away. Or so the Spanish told the Daimyo. It is a land of infinite riches and strange ideas. Perhaps this could be a further avenue of expansion?

[image loading]

Meanwhile, nothing important happens.

[image loading]

After many months, the Daimyo hears vague news of foreign battles. But the call to arms is quietly dropped. Perhaps the Shogun has gone senile in his old age. What if the Mongols were to invade again?

[image loading]

The quiet dying down of the foreign enemy upsets the locals. The restless samurai have called to expel the foreigners and honor the emperor. But the Daimyo of Tosa is wise, and sees further than short-term bloodlust and xenophobia.

[image loading]

In Europe, Austria has apparently gotten its shit packed in by Prussia and now the Hungarians.

[image loading]

Suddenly, opportunity strikes. The Spanish make a most interesting proposal to the Daimyo. By offering to essentially join the Spanish Empire, the Spanish would be able to use their power to protect the Daimyo from Shogunate repercussions.

[image loading]

After consideration, the daimyo decides to take the envoy up with his offer. A few days go by while the Spanish engage the Shogun in talks. (Note: I have no idea what I'm doing here)

[image loading]

When the Spanish triumphantly return with news of success, the general populace rises up, furious that they were now under the rule of foreigners. The daimyo, having planned this from the start (not at all, actually), proceeds to blame the Spanish. The people of Tosa, fine patriots, proceed to chase all the Spanish out of Tosa. They are quickly put down by Shogunate forces.

[image loading]

Tosa will now be the one to forge its own destiny. (ah.)

[image loading]

TOSA BANZAI!
Watch me fail at Paradox: http://www.teamliquid.net/forum/viewmessage.php?topic_id=397564
EchOne
Profile Blog Joined January 2008
United States2906 Posts
February 08 2013 02:28 GMT
#2
Something tells me you're winging it entirely. Excellent.

GLHF
面白くない世の中, 面白くすればいいさ
Caller
Profile Blog Joined September 2007
Poland8075 Posts
February 08 2013 03:12 GMT
#3
well that was underwhelming
Watch me fail at Paradox: http://www.teamliquid.net/forum/viewmessage.php?topic_id=397564
Caller
Profile Blog Joined September 2007
Poland8075 Posts
February 08 2013 12:42 GMT
#4
should probably add a poll

Poll: ARE YOU NOT ENTERTAINED?

Go invade some people, then we talk (15)
 
42%

Go unify Japan or something (10)
 
28%

Shouldn't this be a blog? (10)
 
28%

Can you change the title to something else? (1)
 
3%

36 total votes

Your vote: ARE YOU NOT ENTERTAINED?

(Vote): Go invade some people, then we talk
(Vote): Go unify Japan or something
(Vote): Shouldn't this be a blog?
(Vote): Can you change the title to something else?



Watch me fail at Paradox: http://www.teamliquid.net/forum/viewmessage.php?topic_id=397564
Psyonic_Reaver
Profile Blog Joined June 2007
United States4342 Posts
February 08 2013 14:43 GMT
#5
Great battle report but you may want too be to blogs. I'll keep this thread subscribed, I want to see how you do.
So wait? I'm bad? =(
Archas
Profile Blog Joined July 2010
United States6531 Posts
February 08 2013 15:00 GMT
#6
not enough sanae
The room is ripe with the stench of bitches!
Caller
Profile Blog Joined September 2007
Poland8075 Posts
February 08 2013 15:16 GMT
#7
On February 08 2013 23:43 Psyonic_Reaver wrote:
Great battle report but you may want too be to blogs. I'll keep this thread subscribed, I want to see how you do.

blogs won't work because i dont want to have to make a new blog every single time i update, that would be silly
Watch me fail at Paradox: http://www.teamliquid.net/forum/viewmessage.php?topic_id=397564
sc4k
Profile Blog Joined January 2010
United Kingdom5454 Posts
February 08 2013 15:43 GMT
#8
Suddenly, Spanish. That was unexpected.
icystorage
Profile Blog Joined November 2008
Jollibee19350 Posts
February 08 2013 15:50 GMT
#9
Beautiful. Please continue!
LiquidDota StaffAre you ready for a Miracle-? We are! The International 2017 Champions!
Psyonic_Reaver
Profile Blog Joined June 2007
United States4342 Posts
Last Edited: 2013-02-08 16:56:35
February 08 2013 16:55 GMT
#10
So just make one blog and update it when you have something to add. TL mods can give you edit powers after the 6 month edit lock but its up to you. I think you'd get more readers. <3 ShotCaller
So wait? I'm bad? =(
Caller
Profile Blog Joined September 2007
Poland8075 Posts
February 08 2013 16:58 GMT
#11
On February 09 2013 01:55 Psyonic_Reaver wrote:
So just make one blog and update it when you have something to add. TL mods can give you edit powers after the 6 month edit lock but its up to you. I think you'd get more readers. <3 ShotCaller

I don't know about you, but I never read the blog section :|
Watch me fail at Paradox: http://www.teamliquid.net/forum/viewmessage.php?topic_id=397564
Kurumi
Profile Blog Joined April 2010
Poland6130 Posts
February 08 2013 17:18 GMT
#12
TOSA TOSA TOSA
I work alone. // Visit TL Mafia subforum!
Caller
Profile Blog Joined September 2007
Poland8075 Posts
Last Edited: 2013-02-08 22:44:53
February 08 2013 22:43 GMT
#13
2.Your Golds, Give them Tosa


[image loading]


Tosa, a land free from both the Shogun and foreigners. A poor place, but what can be done? Steal other people's gold, of course. But that is dishonorable.

[image loading]
Yep, that's our castle.


Nevertheless, Tosa needs funds. An expedition is planned to secure territory. China and Korea, of course, are too strong for even the brave and disciplined samurai of Tosa. An easier target needs to be selected.

[image loading]


The vulnerable Johore sultanate lies to the south. It is a land of riches, according to the Dutch travelers that come from that direction. With the maps given to them by the European traders, a plan of attack is drafted, and transport ships are commissioned.

[image loading]


Unfortunately nobody wants to let me invade, or even want to sell boats to Tosa. If you notice, none of my boats are building (days waiting is still the same). This is one of the frustrating parts of Vicky-not being able to buy stuff you want when weak. ITS WOOD AND LINEN. SHIKOKU IS A FOREST ON AN ISLAND.

[image loading]


Fortunately, Tosa retains good ties with the Shogun, despite having declared independence (senile Shogun, indeed!). The Shogun gladly honors the call to arms, looking to distract the restless samurai from his failing regime. He can do so by sending them some 3000 miles away. On boats that won't be able to come back.

[image loading]


Within months, Johore surrenders, ceding a stretch of lightly populated but wealthy territory.

[image loading]

The golds from Johore, combined with the steady increase in foreign ideas and trade, is enough for the Daimyo to finish the boats and do a few other things.

[image loading]

First, he begins a program of industrialization. With this, Tosa is ready to take a step into the next age:

[image loading]

Nom, factories! Making... concrete.

[image loading]

Then, he brings in a foreign officer corps, to increase the efficiency of his general staff. Yet somehow now...

[image loading]

Civilization. Look at all the reforms that can be made!

[image loading]

Poo poo, the East is West!

[image loading]

The research system for a civilized power is pretty straight forward. You click on what you research, and depending on your literacy (left %), number of clergymen, and other buffs, you gain research points. These research points are used to complete research that give you HUGE benefits. Like this one. Which gives me more research points, so I can research while I research.

[image loading]

This is Tosa dog. He really likes research.

[image loading]

What's this? It appears the Ainu have managed to throw off the weakened shackles of the Shogun. This is unacceptable!

[image loading]

Ezo is Japanese! Give us back our cla~

[image loading]

Well, fuck you world, I'll have my own concert of Europe. With hanafuda. And geishas!

[image loading]

LIBRALS

[image loading]

DEMOCRATS! FUUUUUU

[image loading]

The whole point of the revolutions event chain is to simulate the revolutions of 1848. Unfortunately, it only happens to civilized nations, and right now its the mid 1850s. So I expect the revolution to end any day now.

In the meantime, though, I have to deal with my population turning liberal, which is bad, because they don't want to fight or let the government build factories. Basically it means I can't do anything, which is boring. It also means I may have to give them the right to vote in the future. Which also sucks, unless you happen to be in the Americas. Also, they have increased militancy, which makes them more likely to revolt, and makes the revolt larger. These are bad things.

[image loading]

Some twirly guy with a mustache is declaring himself an Emperor? There is only one true Emperor.

[image loading]

[image loading]

Despite the world being very angry about it, and sending us a letter stating just how angry they are, we are now ready to brutally subjugate reclaim the island of Ezo.

[image loading]

Unfortunately for the rest of the world, they don't have any way to stop us. For Aizu has a special condition, one I like to call Hasnoarmy.

[image loading]

Needless to say everything proceeds as planned.

[image loading]

Apparently, watching another people get brutally subjugated is enough to distract the common people from their own subjugation. This is something that hopefully won't be happening years from now.

[image loading]

The Daimyo sees an opportunity to expand his reach in South-Eastern Asia. By invading the Sultanate of Aceh, it provides a valuable way to control naval traffic in the area, forming a chokepoint of sorts to block European powers from interfering in Tosa spheres of influence. Not that we have one at the moment. At least we're civilized!

[image loading]

Unfortunately, the same cannot be said for the recently crushed reintegrated province of Ezo. But they do see ome sense in pre-emptively striking an uncivilized nation Emperor knows how far away from Tosa before they can get us.

[image loading]

After preparations are ready, the Daimyo sends the Army of Tosa down to Indonesia, in a fleet waiting right outside the Aceh capital. A rock was thrown, and then shots were fired, with both sides claiming that the other instigated the issue. Either way, the rock throwing was clearly a good enough premise to annex their entire country.

[image loading]

The first actual battle fought by Tosa forces was a resounding success. The Aceh army consisted mostly of levied peasants, armed with matchlock guns imported from the Ottoman Empire. There were also groups of swordsmen, whom intended to take advantage of the first volley to charge in at the outnumbered Japanese force.

Unfortunately for them, not only were the Japanese better at swordfighting, they were also better at shooting. They also were using Western flintlock guns, which, while not being state of the art, were enough to overwhelm the Aceh forces completely. After three rapid volleys that decimated the Aceh army, a spontaneous banzai charge that could have been completely shattered by a competent foe slammed into the opposing lines, completely routing them. This battle essentially decided the war, with the remaining troops being hunted down as they fled. The Daimyo was concerned about the low discipline of his troops but was content to first consolidate gains before improving the troops.

[image loading]

He was so concerned about this he totally neglected about a HUGE opportunity in China-namely, a man claiming to be the brother of Jesus Christ-the head of the "Kurisu-chan" religion, or so the Daimyo was told-had started a massive rebellion against the Manchu emperor. While the Manchu were clearly winning, the Daimyo realized he missed a chance to gain a valuable piece of Chinese territory. Oh well, China will have to wait.

[image loading]

Finally, victory. Now the Daimyo intended to take a rest, for the world was getting weary of this strange Japanese power that had suddenly become better known than Portugal. With the resources from Aceh, the Daimyo intended to create a powerbase strong enough to throw off the chains of the Shogun on not just himself, but on the rest of Japan. He estimated it would be ten years, ten years of preparation to remove the Shogun. But first peace, peace and consolidation, a chance to breathe...

[image loading]

[image loading]
Watch me fail at Paradox: http://www.teamliquid.net/forum/viewmessage.php?topic_id=397564
Caller
Profile Blog Joined September 2007
Poland8075 Posts
February 08 2013 23:47 GMT
#14
oh right a poll
Poll: Who is the one true Emperor?

HERESY (15)
 
56%

Palpatine (6)
 
22%

Napoleon Bonaparte (3)
 
11%

Komei (3)
 
11%

27 total votes

Your vote: Who is the one true Emperor?

(Vote): Napoleon Bonaparte
(Vote): Palpatine
(Vote): Komei
(Vote): HERESY


Watch me fail at Paradox: http://www.teamliquid.net/forum/viewmessage.php?topic_id=397564
sc4k
Profile Blog Joined January 2010
United Kingdom5454 Posts
February 09 2013 00:46 GMT
#15
You have convinced me to actually bother playing this game. Bought it a long time ago. Thanks Caller...
icystorage
Profile Blog Joined November 2008
Jollibee19350 Posts
February 09 2013 01:23 GMT
#16
Grats on the battle! can't wait for the next installment
LiquidDota StaffAre you ready for a Miracle-? We are! The International 2017 Champions!
rwrzr
Profile Joined February 2010
United States1980 Posts
February 09 2013 02:12 GMT
#17
mordehuehue
FADC
Lysteria
Profile Blog Joined November 2008
France2280 Posts
Last Edited: 2013-02-09 14:47:07
February 09 2013 13:49 GMT
#18
Ah hah that's a fun AAR indeed. :p

Which mods are you using, and are you playing with the Victoria II's add-on ?
edit : I mean, the others than the New Nations' one.
Caller
Profile Blog Joined September 2007
Poland8075 Posts
February 09 2013 15:35 GMT
#19
On February 09 2013 22:49 Lysteria wrote:
Ah hah that's a fun AAR indeed. :p

Which mods are you using, and are you playing with the Victoria II's add-on ?
edit : I mean, the others than the New Nations' one.

I'm playin with AHD , yes. This is the only mod I am using in this aar. I will have to mod in some things, however.
Watch me fail at Paradox: http://www.teamliquid.net/forum/viewmessage.php?topic_id=397564
Archas
Profile Blog Joined July 2010
United States6531 Posts
February 09 2013 15:39 GMT
#20
Putting aside my previous troll response, this is a highly entertaining read. Please continue when you can.
The room is ripe with the stench of bitches!
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