Handshaking Thread - Page 2

On May 15 2020 10:55 Pangpootata wrote:
I am firmly in favor of continuing with the handshake tradition, so I can continue watching Donald Trump assert his superiority over other world leaders.

On May 15 2020 02:31 KwarK wrote:

I genuinely thought you were suggesting divining useful information from the temperature of a handshake as a joke and that I was playing along with your joke. I read your post as an amusing deconstructive parody intended to show how stupid that kind of analysis would be and I genuinely thought it was a good joke and enjoyed it. I wasn’t mocking you on purpose, I thought we were both mocking the same stupid idea you were jokingly proposing. It never occurred to me that you have some kind of actual system in which the temperature of someone’s hand tells you what kind of person they are.

How would that even work? There are a huge number of personality traits and I doubt you can feel the difference between 35.5 Celsius and 35.6, for example. I thought you were, as a joke, proposing a system of “this person feels warm blooded, probably mammalian” rather than seriously claiming an actual system. Please explain your temperature based system though. Which temperatures mean what, and how do you measure them?

Also stop sniffing people, it’s weird.

On May 15 2020 13:23 xM(Z wrote:
one uses jokes on people who can't conceive of certain things if for nothing else than to break the ice. once the audience loosen up, it becomes easier for information to be received and even if it's perceived as a joke, it is progress because the idea gets processed, thought of, rationalized.
best way to look at it is: meaningful banter. i mean, one handshake and you can definitely tell of someone has a fever; next step, run dude, just runnnnn ...

as to your query, are you unaware of the divide between people who feel cold to the touch and the ones that feel warm?, or you question whether or not that can be used to derive an useful trait/attribute?. i'll assume the later and just say, manners?, give that dude your jacket.
overall, i get from you that you don't value practical attributes. ex: touching(hands here) completes or gives credit to personal credentials: rough hands = craftsman vs soft hands = office rat (when hiring someone for a manual labor job, since everything else can be obfuscated or can/do contain lies(CV)).
+ Show Spoiler +

On May 15 2020 13:43 KwarK wrote:

I don't want to accidentally offend you by assuming you're not being 100% serious just because it sounds odd to me so I'm going to take your response literally.

If I'm understanding you correctly you're saying that the value of the handshake greeting is that you can greet someone, assess their body temperature, and then offer them a jacket if they're below a certain temperature? Does that happen often? How many spare jackets do you take to professional functions where you might meet a number of strangers? Is there an etiquette for subsequently recovering them or are these jackets gifts? Do you have them manufactured with your contact info on them like business cards or are they just whatever surplus jackets you might happen to have?

I apologize for the barrage of questions but your life is just so different from mine. I shake a hand because it's expected that I do so but I've never used it as an opportunity to assess whether an offer of a jacket might be appropriate.

On May 14 2020 03:38 Seeker wrote:
Don’t abolish handshakes. They’re too damn important to society. Instead, we need to evolve to the point where at least one party brings out a travel-sized hand sanitizer and allows all involved parties to use it before the handshake(s) can take place. There, problem solved.

On May 14 2020 04:13 Seeker wrote:

For me, personally, I like physical forms of contact when I meet and get to know a new person. And a handshake is often indicative of what kind of person you’re dealing with, so I think it definitely has a role in society that cannot just be ignored.

On May 14 2020 11:36 Seeker wrote:

I'm not superstitious about any arbitrary social customs.

On May 15 2020 14:26 Danglars wrote:

Let me copy in and echo Seeker's sentiments. A handshake isn't going to give you a ton of information, but it does give you an idea of "what kind of person you're dealing with." It's in the realm of greeting, body language, facial expression, vocal inflection, manner of dress. These aren't the kind of social and cultural cues that you can debate in black-and-white terms.

And honestly, I think the superstition/obvious joke is just trolls doing their schtick. Like obviously, you don't have to kiss or hug in a relationship when you really think about it etc etc.

On May 15 2020 05:18 NrG.Bamboo wrote:
Outside of the context of a pandemic, how do some of you see approaching more than one person? For instance, you go to a bar and see 6 familiar faces standing in a circle talking. Maybe you give a wave or a greeting to the group as a whole, maybe shake hands and introduce yourself to anyone you don't know. However, I know a lot of people who seem to need to shake each and every hand before engaging in conversation. On one hand (heh) I understand that it might feel odd to be snubbed (some person comes in an shakes 3 hands close to them and gives a nod to you, slightly further away), but the person entering the scenario just didn't want to keep shoving himself between people for the sake of being equally polite.

Is this "imbalanced greeting" something that ever crosses your minds?

EDIT: and for what it's worth I see it similarly to Drone. I think there are definite benefits to physical contact, but can only speak for myself: I love giving a hug to someone I'm excited to see, or happy to have met.

On May 15 2020 22:34 Dangermousecatdog wrote:

You are still shaking hands over in USA? Bars are still open? Anyways when meeting people just raise your hand/ wave/ say hello/ tilt head/nod/raise eyebrows/smile. Make a joke about not shaking hands. Why act like there is only one way to greet someone and it's with a handshake?

On May 15 2020 14:26 Danglars wrote:
Let me copy in and echo Seeker's sentiments. A handshake isn't going to give you a ton of information, but it does give you an idea of "what kind of person you're dealing with." It's in the realm of greeting, body language, facial expression, vocal inflection, manner of dress. These aren't the kind of social and cultural cues that you can debate in black-and-white terms.

On May 16 2020 02:02 Mohdoo wrote:
The one thing I take from handshakes is to know if the guy is insecure or not. If his handshake is too firm, he's extremely insecure. I know to be delicate with him and try to never make him think I am trying to take control of anything. If I need to take control, i do it delicately and try to make it seem like I am not. If you can convince an overly firm handshake guy they are being a big contributor, they will generally not make a stink.

However, I would say it is always pretty clear WITHOUT a handshake if that is true or not. A handshake gives me information, but that information is not unique. I get that information in lots of other ways.

I can't imagine a world where I get something out of a handshake that I wouldn't from a brief conversation.

On May 16 2020 03:35 TheYango wrote:

They absolutely are. A whole lot of things that humans have chalked up to "intuition" have proven to be meaningless bullshit in the past few decades when put up to rigorous objective analysis. The human brain is extremely good at assigning patterns and confirming biases based on random noise that has no actual value.

On May 16 2020 04:16 Archeon wrote:

The thing is that you can create a stronger impression by piling these things up, especially in a first meeting. You can get an impression of insecurity in a dialogue, but if the person you meet has a body language that speaks of confidence and speaks confidently it leaves a much stronger impression than if one of the two point towards insecurity. If you're in a meeting with 20 people and the person at the end of table didn't speak but still looks confident, looked you in the eye during the greeting and had a firm but not too firm handshake you are likely to think that they are in charge.

When meeting someone humans instinctively check body language and handshake is one way of asserting confidence, which we generally associate with competence, so it's useful if you want people to trust you. It's the reason politicians, swindlers and CEOs train these things.

Generally I like handshakes as an easy fairly natural way of establishing mutual physical contact, which creates trust. Obviously not during Corona. But I find it less awkward than French kissing or hugging f.e..

On May 16 2020 06:35 ASoo wrote:
We should follow the canine example and replace handshakes with mutual butt sniffing.

Change my mind.