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We are extremely close to shutting down this thread for the same reasons the PUA thread was shut down. While some of the time this thread contains actual discussion with people asking help and people giving nice advice, it often gets derailed by rubbish that should not be here. The moderation team will be trying to steer this thread in a different direction from now on.

Posts of the following nature are banned:
1) ANYTHING regarding PUA. If your post contains the words 'alpha' or 'beta' or anything of that sort please don't hit post.
2) Stupid brags. You can tell us about your nice success stories with someone, but posts such as 'lol 50 Tinder matches' are a no-no.
3) Any misogynistic bullshit, including discussion about rape culture.
4) One night stands and random sex. These are basically brags that invariably devolve into gender role discussions and misogynistic comments.

Last chance, guys. This thread is for dating advice and sharing dating stories. While gender roles, sociocultural norms, and our biological imperative to reproduce are all tangentially related, these subjects are not the main purpose of the thread. Please AVOID these discussions. If you want to discuss them at length, go to PMs or start a blog. If you disagree with someone's ideologies, state that you disagree with them and why they won't work from a dating standpoint and move on. We will not tolerate any lengthy derailments that aren't directly about dating.
TheFish7
Profile Blog Joined February 2012
United States2824 Posts
August 21 2013 14:44 GMT
#5161
Let them eat cake!
~ ~ <°)))><~ ~ ~
DarkPlasmaBall
Profile Blog Joined March 2010
United States44336 Posts
August 21 2013 14:47 GMT
#5162
On August 21 2013 16:59 Recognizable wrote:
Show nested quote +
On August 21 2013 12:50 biology]major wrote:
On August 21 2013 12:39 AndySCWilson wrote:
Almost every girl I meet, I don't want to date.


I am like this too. Except after a long time of being like that, I finally found someone I like. She lives like 2 doors down from me, and we have met 1 time on a drunk night after midterms. I am just patiently waiting for the opportunity that fate will me a chance to say hi and talk to her... Q_Q. I don't even know how to have a relationship, and I am sooo swamped with school, but I do want to get to know her better. Things we have in common are we are from the same city, from same country, thousands of miles away and now are 2 doors away from each other. WTF


Errr. Just go up to her and say hi.


I agree. Make your own opportunities and then take them.
"There is nothing more satisfying than looking at a crowd of people and helping them get what I love." ~Day[9] Daily #100
Slardar
Profile Joined April 2010
Canada7593 Posts
August 22 2013 01:03 GMT
#5163
Just wanted to drop in and say #ForeverAlone. Shietttttt this is getting tough.
chadissilent
Profile Blog Joined September 2010
Canada1187 Posts
August 22 2013 01:05 GMT
#5164
On August 21 2013 23:44 TheFish7 wrote:
Let them eat cake!

Every day's my birthday 'cause bitches love cake.
Killscreen
Profile Joined February 2012
188 Posts
August 22 2013 12:35 GMT
#5165
On August 21 2013 03:33 r.Evo wrote:
Show nested quote +
On August 20 2013 22:57 NotSorry wrote:
I feel "shit test" is getting massively over used for any time of negative reaction rather than it's intended purpose of a pick up qualification. Once you've already picked up a woman that kind of behavior is her just being a bitch or whore. Pick ups are a numbers game, you can't change every hot girl into your long term girl because odds are you wouldn't want anything to do with at least half of them outside of sex. So why waste time on manipulative tactics when you can just move on to the next girl that isn't a bitch/whore?

Hopping on this because people keep getting it wrong left right and center.

First of all, someone "shit testing" someone else doesn't turn anyone into a bitch, whore or manipulative brat. What's defined as a shit test in the PUA community is, on a larger scale, nothing more than one person trying to verify if the frame the other person presents is real or fake.

In practice that means that everyone shit tests everyone all the time until the point at which you accepted the frames you've been presented with. Random guy shows up at a party and is talking about how he was just street car racing in Hong Kong? Any comment that even remotely pokes at whether the persona that story represents (e.g. "World travelling race car freak") actually exists can be considered a shit test. It's prettys much *poke poke* "Are you for real?"


In the realm of dating all that happened was that someone thought "Hey, she's asking: 'Is he gonna take my shit?' so let's call it a shit-test hurpdurp" and it went downhill from there. In reality it's more about frame dominance than anything else, that's why people usually don't shit test their doctors.

This is very accurate and eloquently put.
When women test your frame, and you pass that test, it generates a lot of attraction, which is why a lot of guys will actually attempt to invite these tests. I have a buddy who sometimes wears a Twilight T-Shirt :D
Zooper31
Profile Joined May 2009
United States5710 Posts
August 23 2013 03:40 GMT
#5166
So girl broke up with me who I was in love with. After more than 2weeks I finally start getting over her and try to find another girl. Now the girl is hugely pissed off that I was trying to get with another girl and is threatening and insulting me. Wtf, if you didn't want me to see others don't break up with me. I'm trying to move on from you... that's why I did what I did.
Asato ma sad gamaya, tamaso ma jyotir gamaya, mrtyor mamrtam gamaya
Rhino85
Profile Joined February 2011
United States90 Posts
August 23 2013 04:02 GMT
#5167
On August 23 2013 12:40 Zooper31 wrote:
So girl broke up with me who I was in love with. After more than 2weeks I finally start getting over her and try to find another girl. Now the girl is hugely pissed off that I was trying to get with another girl and is threatening and insulting me. Wtf, if you didn't want me to see others don't break up with me. I'm trying to move on from you... that's why I did what I did.


Its going to sound cliche but you're better off with out her. If she tries to act jealous after she breaks up with you then she has issues you don't want to deal with anyways. Some bitches don't know what they have till they don't have it anymore.
The object of war is not to die for your country but make the other bastard die for his.
QuanticHawk
Profile Blog Joined May 2007
United States32056 Posts
August 23 2013 04:16 GMT
#5168
this is exactly why, whether you wanna be friends ultimately or not, you dont talk to that person for a while post breakup. no good comes out of it
PROFESSIONAL GAMER - SEND ME OFFERS TO JOIN YOUR TEAM - USA USA USA
Zooper31
Profile Joined May 2009
United States5710 Posts
Last Edited: 2013-08-23 04:29:19
August 23 2013 04:28 GMT
#5169
On August 23 2013 13:02 Rhino85 wrote:
Show nested quote +
On August 23 2013 12:40 Zooper31 wrote:
So girl broke up with me who I was in love with. After more than 2weeks I finally start getting over her and try to find another girl. Now the girl is hugely pissed off that I was trying to get with another girl and is threatening and insulting me. Wtf, if you didn't want me to see others don't break up with me. I'm trying to move on from you... that's why I did what I did.


Its going to sound cliche but you're better off with out her. If she tries to act jealous after she breaks up with you then she has issues you don't want to deal with anyways. Some bitches don't know what they have till they don't have it anymore.


Oh ya I alrdy removed her from all contact lists and off fb. She completely freaked out at me and threatened my life if she sees me again. That shit ain't cool. But hey, all feelings are gone when I fear for my life instead haha. Cured my depression and I'm happy again ironically.
Asato ma sad gamaya, tamaso ma jyotir gamaya, mrtyor mamrtam gamaya
thebakereb
Profile Joined December 2012
Canada31 Posts
Last Edited: 2013-08-23 04:31:06
August 23 2013 04:30 GMT
#5170
I really dont know how to describe what i have, I've been dating a girl for like a year and a half now and i kind of feel like we hit a wall and dont get me wrong she makes me incredibly happy but like the actual feeling of "IN LOVE" isn't there and what also complicates it is I move away for college in like [9]days so normally id try and work through it but ill be an hour(which isnt a lot) away plus I've had bad experience with long distance relationships. I dont know what to do, I dont really want to tell her now because its my last week and i dont want to ruin the end of summer and i also want to spend it with her.

Any advice? I have to come home for a birthday like 2 weeks into school so should i talk to her then?
TheFish7
Profile Blog Joined February 2012
United States2824 Posts
August 23 2013 04:39 GMT
#5171
You're going to college man....
You know what to do
~ ~ <°)))><~ ~ ~
Recognizable
Profile Blog Joined December 2011
Netherlands1552 Posts
Last Edited: 2013-08-23 16:36:15
August 23 2013 16:34 GMT
#5172
"I really like you, but we'll be studying in different city's so I can't see it working. Let's just stay friends!!"
Something along those lines. In short, she doesn't like me the way I like her.
I'm sad right now
VayneAuthority
Profile Joined October 2012
United States8983 Posts
Last Edited: 2013-08-23 16:42:10
August 23 2013 16:41 GMT
#5173
On August 22 2013 21:35 Killscreen wrote:
Show nested quote +
On August 21 2013 03:33 r.Evo wrote:
On August 20 2013 22:57 NotSorry wrote:
I feel "shit test" is getting massively over used for any time of negative reaction rather than it's intended purpose of a pick up qualification. Once you've already picked up a woman that kind of behavior is her just being a bitch or whore. Pick ups are a numbers game, you can't change every hot girl into your long term girl because odds are you wouldn't want anything to do with at least half of them outside of sex. So why waste time on manipulative tactics when you can just move on to the next girl that isn't a bitch/whore?

Hopping on this because people keep getting it wrong left right and center.

First of all, someone "shit testing" someone else doesn't turn anyone into a bitch, whore or manipulative brat. What's defined as a shit test in the PUA community is, on a larger scale, nothing more than one person trying to verify if the frame the other person presents is real or fake.

In practice that means that everyone shit tests everyone all the time until the point at which you accepted the frames you've been presented with. Random guy shows up at a party and is talking about how he was just street car racing in Hong Kong? Any comment that even remotely pokes at whether the persona that story represents (e.g. "World travelling race car freak") actually exists can be considered a shit test. It's prettys much *poke poke* "Are you for real?"


In the realm of dating all that happened was that someone thought "Hey, she's asking: 'Is he gonna take my shit?' so let's call it a shit-test hurpdurp" and it went downhill from there. In reality it's more about frame dominance than anything else, that's why people usually don't shit test their doctors.

This is very accurate and eloquently put.
When women test your frame, and you pass that test, it generates a lot of attraction, which is why a lot of guys will actually attempt to invite these tests. I have a buddy who sometimes wears a Twilight T-Shirt :D


yea and then people wonder why relationships go down hill so quickly or are fleeting. You are attracting people with the most interesting parts about you, so when you have nothing to match that they will get bored of you eventually. If you're just trying to pick up girls fine, but that's a recipe for never having a solid long term relationship unless she just never gets bored with your few outstanding qualities. It's much better in my opinion to have a basic attraction and learn more about each other from there, saving your "ace(s) in the hole" for down the road so the relationship doesn't get stale.
I come in for the scraps
Badfatpanda
Profile Blog Joined December 2010
United States9719 Posts
August 23 2013 16:51 GMT
#5174
On August 24 2013 01:41 VayneAuthority wrote:
Show nested quote +
On August 22 2013 21:35 Killscreen wrote:
On August 21 2013 03:33 r.Evo wrote:
On August 20 2013 22:57 NotSorry wrote:
I feel "shit test" is getting massively over used for any time of negative reaction rather than it's intended purpose of a pick up qualification. Once you've already picked up a woman that kind of behavior is her just being a bitch or whore. Pick ups are a numbers game, you can't change every hot girl into your long term girl because odds are you wouldn't want anything to do with at least half of them outside of sex. So why waste time on manipulative tactics when you can just move on to the next girl that isn't a bitch/whore?

Hopping on this because people keep getting it wrong left right and center.

First of all, someone "shit testing" someone else doesn't turn anyone into a bitch, whore or manipulative brat. What's defined as a shit test in the PUA community is, on a larger scale, nothing more than one person trying to verify if the frame the other person presents is real or fake.

In practice that means that everyone shit tests everyone all the time until the point at which you accepted the frames you've been presented with. Random guy shows up at a party and is talking about how he was just street car racing in Hong Kong? Any comment that even remotely pokes at whether the persona that story represents (e.g. "World travelling race car freak") actually exists can be considered a shit test. It's prettys much *poke poke* "Are you for real?"


In the realm of dating all that happened was that someone thought "Hey, she's asking: 'Is he gonna take my shit?' so let's call it a shit-test hurpdurp" and it went downhill from there. In reality it's more about frame dominance than anything else, that's why people usually don't shit test their doctors.

This is very accurate and eloquently put.
When women test your frame, and you pass that test, it generates a lot of attraction, which is why a lot of guys will actually attempt to invite these tests. I have a buddy who sometimes wears a Twilight T-Shirt :D


yea and then people wonder why relationships go down hill so quickly or are fleeting. You are attracting people with the most interesting parts about you, so when you have nothing to match that they will get bored of you eventually. If you're just trying to pick up girls fine, but that's a recipe for never having a solid long term relationship unless she just never gets bored with your few outstanding qualities. It's much better in my opinion to have a basic attraction and learn more about each other from there, saving your "ace(s) in the hole" for down the road so the relationship doesn't get stale.


Unless your "ace in the hole" allows you to meet women that are your type! Then it's perfectly acceptable.

Also, been wondering a while even if I usually just lurk in this thread. The fuck is the PUA community?
Music is a higher revelation than all wisdom and philosophy. -Beethoven | Mech isn't a build, it's a way of life. -MajOr | Charlie.Sheen: "What is sarcastic, kids who have no courage to fight?" | #TerranPride #yolo #swag -Naama after 2-0'ing MC at HSC VI
Roxor9999
Profile Joined December 2011
Netherlands771 Posts
August 23 2013 16:53 GMT
#5175
On August 23 2013 13:30 thebakereb wrote:
I really dont know how to describe what i have, I've been dating a girl for like a year and a half now and i kind of feel like we hit a wall and dont get me wrong she makes me incredibly happy but like the actual feeling of "IN LOVE" isn't there and what also complicates it is I move away for college in like [9]days so normally id try and work through it but ill be an hour(which isnt a lot) away plus I've had bad experience with long distance relationships. I dont know what to do, I dont really want to tell her now because its my last week and i dont want to ruin the end of summer and i also want to spend it with her.

Any advice? I have to come home for a birthday like 2 weeks into school so should i talk to her then?

1 hour definitely isn't long distance. You will have plenty of opportunity to see her if you want.
QuanticHawk
Profile Blog Joined May 2007
United States32056 Posts
Last Edited: 2013-08-23 17:21:35
August 23 2013 17:16 GMT
#5176
On August 23 2013 13:30 thebakereb wrote:
I really dont know how to describe what i have, I've been dating a girl for like a year and a half now and i kind of feel like we hit a wall and dont get me wrong she makes me incredibly happy but like the actual feeling of "IN LOVE" isn't there and what also complicates it is I move away for college in like [9]days so normally id try and work through it but ill be an hour(which isnt a lot) away plus I've had bad experience with long distance relationships. I dont know what to do, I dont really want to tell her now because its my last week and i dont want to ruin the end of summer and i also want to spend it with her.

Any advice? I have to come home for a birthday like 2 weeks into school so should i talk to her then?


dump her before you go. just do it in person like an adult and gentle and quick about it. there's never really a right time for that type of thing and waiting is just gonna give you stress. youre gonna sit there in a new place, scoping out all the new girls and then youre gonna feel guilty because you know what you have to do

panda: http://www.teamliquid.net/forum/viewmessage.php?topic_id=229041

just take a look at squattincassanova's posts. that's what most pua people are like

PROFESSIONAL GAMER - SEND ME OFFERS TO JOIN YOUR TEAM - USA USA USA
farvacola
Profile Blog Joined January 2011
United States18827 Posts
August 23 2013 17:22 GMT
#5177
Long distance, especially something like an hour away, is definitely doable, the big question is one we can't answer and likely neither can you; do you like this girl enough for it to work? If you genuinely see yourself being with her for the long haul, don't dump her based on some expectation that you cut all strings in college.
"when the Dead Kennedys found out they had skinhead fans, they literally wrote a song titled 'Nazi Punks Fuck Off'"
QuanticHawk
Profile Blog Joined May 2007
United States32056 Posts
August 23 2013 17:25 GMT
#5178
i think if you dont feel in love after a year and a half, it probably means it isnt really that special. that's more damning than taking a hs gf to college an hour away.

still, who knows what happens in the future. id break up, let her do her own thing and give her space, and reach out as a friend in a few months. there's no need to totally cut her out of your life, but for her sake and yours, post break up, you def need a few months of not contacting each other to get over things or shit gets messy real fast
PROFESSIONAL GAMER - SEND ME OFFERS TO JOIN YOUR TEAM - USA USA USA
farvacola
Profile Blog Joined January 2011
United States18827 Posts
August 23 2013 17:34 GMT
#5179
Yeah, now that I'm rereading the dudes post, I'd say breaking it off on amicable terms is probably the best bet.
"when the Dead Kennedys found out they had skinhead fans, they literally wrote a song titled 'Nazi Punks Fuck Off'"
QuanticHawk
Profile Blog Joined May 2007
United States32056 Posts
August 23 2013 18:58 GMT
#5180
http://kotaku.com/bodybuilding-forum-freaks-the-heck-out-over-dudes-love-1185678305

thought the reactions were funny and this is relevant here haha
PROFESSIONAL GAMER - SEND ME OFFERS TO JOIN YOUR TEAM - USA USA USA
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