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Brave New World

Forum Index > Final Edits
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Brave New World

Text bySaracen
July 20th, 2010 07:19 GMT

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Brave New World
by Saracen
Team Liquid: Final Edits


The gods gazed down from their frozen thrones, their icy pupils piercing the clouds below. Sitting atop these frosty heights, they saw the world, an open book, through eagles’ eyes. They watched the ebb and flow of the tide of war, the creation and fall of empires and nations. At times, the small, insignificant pawns in this grand game would look up to the frosty skies, their small minds unable to comprehend or imagine the magnificence that lay beyond. And then, their thoughts would be brutally interrupted by the blast of an arclite cannon or the hum of a warp blade, leaving them to wonder no more.
New Shores
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Chapter One: Terran, the Golden Boy

Chapter Two: Zerg, the Bastard Child

Chapter Three: Flight of the Phoenix

Chapter Four: Gulliver's Travels

Chapter Five: B.Net 1.984

Chapter Six: The Little Pony

An icy wind of change blew furiously through the silent halls. Heads turned, a host of eyes, pupils doused in cold fire, looked, expectant, towards the center throne. Upon that frigid seat, the denizen stroked his frosty beard. Almost pensive, he knew the ten year old floodgates, battered and cracked, could contain the deluge no longer. And so, with a single nod, the icy host rose and walked to the edge of the hall overlooking the mortal world below. The center lord stepped forward and raised a mighty arm, summoning all the wind and fury of the heavenly skies. And with a single swing, the floodgates burst, pouring forth a torrent of cold and stormy change that swept and submerged their decade old creation.

With a single hand, the frozen gods tore the world asunder.


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Chapter One: Terran, The Golden Boy
(A story of Terran patching)

We raise our arms, the wicked fall,
Our battle cry and spirits soar.
Our race, as one, will conquer all.
Sing glory to the Pride of War.
- Terran Battle Chant

It was a lush and verdant place. The trees reached up to the clouds, and the alien fruit was delicious and plentiful. Our scouts reported an abundance of scattered mineral deposits in the surrounding area, littering the banks of the rushing tributaries from the great river to the north. Our landing site was perfect, and our hopes were high. We drank heartily and festively that night, and slept well.

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Entering the New World...

Day one. Our scanner system reported masses of alien forces in the surrounding jungles. Their movements were quick and erratic. But what they lacked in order and discipline, they made up for in sheer size and strange yet advanced technology. We even caught a low resolution image of a never before seen Zerg, an enormous airborne manta ray with a host of Broodlings swarming behind. By the grace of God, the Zerg made no aggressive fronts, but there is no doubt in my mind that, today, we were the luckiest bastards alive. Though we’ve contacted Blizzard HQ and requested immediate assistance, there’s no way in hell we’re sleeping soundly. Grab them ice cubes, boys; there’s gonna be double shifts tonight.

Day five. We’ve engaged in countless skirmishes these past few days. It seems that the Zerg are testing our mettle, our fortitude, taunting us with just a taste of their overwhelming numbers. Well, give ‘em hell, I say. Even so, we’ve barely held our outposts, and our supplies are dwindling fast. But what irks me the most is that HQ doesn’t give a flying shit about our distress calls. They’re just toying with our lives, dropping tiny health and tech packs and small boxes of relief cargo. What they can’t seem to shove through their cinderblock of a skull is that we don’t need no goddamn vitamin tablets. Because right now, we just don’t have the men and the resources to fight that never ending swarm one on one. Come on, HQ. We need bigger guns.

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The might of the Swarm.

Day six. Today is a sad day here on the northern front. Our men are weak and tired, and our once steadfast defense is in shambles. Morale has plummeted since day one; memories of those jubilant, blissful times have long been buried beneath our ragged suits and battered helms. Not an hour passes where every battle weary soldier doesn’t yearn for home across this vast expanse. And yet, with the end nowhere in sight, that damned HQ did it again. They confiscated our SCVs’ health packs and slowed our troop conscription and training to a snail’s pace. How the hell are we supposed to fight those potato-headed Protoss bastards that keep appearing around our perimeter, now? A common phrase now echoes throughout the forlorn camp: “I want out.”

Day seven. Thank the lord, our prayers have been answered. From the heavens, our manna, our bread of life, has fallen into our eager and outstretched hands. This morning, HQ dropped us a round of the newest and shiniest 80mm longbolt missiles, and they look absolutely amazing. And, on top of that, they’ve equipped our Thor mech units with state-of-the-art explosive shrapnel shells, which I saw in action firsthand this afternoon at the East Victoria outpost. Those flying Zergs never had a chance.

Day eight. Mutiny is a-stirring in the barracks of our highly prized marauder task force. HQ just informed us that it would be withholding their favorite concussive shells, reciting some obviously rehearsed bullshit about empty coffers, our extraordinary performance and fortitude and whatnot. The rocket heads didn’t buy it, of course, and now they’re threatening to go rogue. We can’t afford any more losses, let alone defects. This is our fortress, our bastion against the wilds, and we need every man we can get.

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The mightiest of men.

Day eleven. It’s official. Our artillery line is the scariest bundle of firepower known to man, beast, and Zerg. Those arclite shock cannons will blow up anything that walks, even the massive demon-plated Ultralisk. And with our tank crew bigger, tougher, and more coordinated that ever before, endless swarms of Zerglings drop like flies in an oven. Even our infantry is timid around those mighty gods of the earth, for fear of accidentally wandering into their enormous blast radius. With our Scandinavian warriors pillaging the skies and our artillery ravaging the ground, our mechanical force is near invincible. It’s a good day to be a Terran.

Day fifteen. We just got word from HQ that our funding and supplies are being cut. According to them, we’re doing just fine, so they’re turning their tail like General Mengsk at Korhal and leaving us to fend for ourselves. Well, let it be known that we’re not like Sarah Kerrigan; the might of our force rivals that of the hosts of heaven. We are the strongest army in the galaxy, and we will defend this territory – no, rule this jungle planet with an iron fist. Already, the Zerg are scrambling, cowering in fear at the sound of our march. And the Protoss have long since abandoned this satellite world, leaving us to plunder the bountiful natural resources to our hearts’ content. “Plunder?” No, why say that of what is rightfully ours? For we are the conquerors, the victors, and these are our spoils. This land, this beautiful virgin soil now rich and unblemished, is ours for the taking. For glory, for the Dominion, for the Terran race. We are the Pride of War.

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The Pride of War


Chapter Two: Zerg, The Bastard Child
(A poem about the might or plight of the Swarm)

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Zerg: Overcome All

Rise, my child of the swarm
And listen to this tale of woe,
Where sullen hearts as one conform
To fight our greatest unseen foe.

Crack the egg, its supple shell
Unfurls into a world afresh.
Born in slime and blood of hell
The carapace and armored flesh

Crawl and stumble forward slow,
The creep so slimy underneath.
It aids your padded claws below
Encroach upon this trodden heath.

Look around, your eyes so wide;
Embrace this land – it’s yours to take.
Claim the world in just one stride;
This continent, your will shall break.

Your throat emits a feral sound –
O destiny, you know your place.
You drink the rivers, eat the ground
As part of the victorious race.

The future looks so bright indeed,
And, perched atop the highest peaks
You greet your fate with utmost speed.
But then the future’s herald speaks:

“Look, o Zerg, the time draws near.
Your kingdom’s rule shall wilt and fade,
Your power slowly disappear
And greatest works shall be unmade.”

And up atop those rocky stones,
The horror shows upon your eyes
And chills the marrow of your bones –
A change that rocks the earth and skies.

Your gaze, a black and stormy cloud
Is cast across a wilted hive.
A race now lost, but once so proud,
So sadly struggles to survive.

The warriors have fallen fast –
The lurkers of the glory years,
Defilers of a golden past
Will shed their bedrock tombstone tears.

The mighty scourge once ruled the skies,
The queens crawl slow, have lost their wings.
The ancient soldier falls and dies
Devouring, no more, the springs.

But look, o Zerg, embrace the new
The swarm’s grotesquely altered face
A parasitic cockroach spew,
A truly weak and bug-like race.

A putrid sack of burning flesh
Is pulsing, almost seems alive.
This sad and rotten nitric mesh,
It’s damage? Merely thirty five.

What next, a hardened bug so bland.
It’s tunneled bottom shall encroach
The hallowed grounds, the creep-spewn lands.
Reflect the sorrow of the Roach.

The Overlords have lost their sight.
So blind, their holy pupils pass
A newer face, a “seer,” takes flight,
And robs you of one hundred gas.

Infest, in the Defiler’s stead
This steward, one cannot compare.
It rears its small and ugly head,
To “plague” so weak the unaware.

The Spire crippled, still it stands
A structure that once ruled the peaks,
“Corrupted” by some unclean hands
Or useless tentacles and beaks.

And now the lord of ticks and slugs
A slowly floating manta ray
Spews out an obscene line of bugs,
Then turns its tail and flies away.

And Zerglings, long ago revered
To quickly shred a base to bits,
Are now not something to be feared,
Their sagging muscles slow their hits.

Atop the peaks, your pupils wide,
You watch the once-proud race transform
A bland nine unit bug-like tide –
Mere shadow of the former swarm.

You know your foe, who smote this race,
The third creation never smiled.
It sits atop this rocky place
As Blizzard’s only bastard child.

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Oh, how we have fallen...


Chapter Three: Flight of the Phoenix
(A story of how the Phoenix found its wings)

From ashes burns a smokeless fire,
Embers crisp begin to rise.
From shallow grave, a burning pyre
Born again, the Phoenix flies.

I have walked amongst the ruins of Aiur, tread upon that tattered and hallowed ground. Serpent vines and tentacle roots encroach these old and weathered stones, weaving a seamless and intricate network of Nature’s flesh and bones. The bricks, crumbled, cracked, and splintered, a resilient testament to the fires that burned in the hearts and eyes of our heroic departed, sprawl flat across the unkempt ground, shackled by Nature’s iron fingers. And then they speak. In dull tremors, they bemoan the fettered spirits, chained beneath the dust of the earth, within these very stones. Fly, my brethren, for I will tell you a story of this place, of a people who found their wings and, like the twilight Kakaru, took to the virgin skies.

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Sacred grounds.

I was a scientist, the head of the Aeronautics Research Tribunal. The program was created with my flesh and blood, my body and soul. It was my greatest pride, and it was destined to be the pride of my country as well. The research was slow, at first. My peers were skeptical and my funding was scarce. Still, my work consumed me, and, two grueling years later, a prototype was unveiled. Designed to explore strange and alien worlds, to venture into the farthest reaches of the galaxy, it was aptly named the “Scout.”

~~~~~

The high council was unimpressed. “An interesting piece of craftsmanship,” they remarked, “But far too costly. It’s slow, unreliable, and difficult to pilot, and its power is second rate. Such a novelty will never find place in our elite contingent.” I was devastated, and drank much that night. But the vision of the graceful flying Kakaru still pervaded my thoughts; I would not give up hope. The next day, I burned all my previous blueprints; I would start afresh. I would create a new frigate, compact and agile, yet powerfully deadly, and it would rule the skies like the pirate sailors of yore once terrorized the seas. In their honor, I called it the “Corsair.”

However, the high council was still skeptical. At the time, our standing army was invincible, with scarabs and psionic shockwaves carving the bones of our fallen enemies and melting the landscape anew, while my prized creation could only hover alone and fire wistfully at the clouds above. My motivation fast fading, I was beginning to lose hope. Then they arrived. Riding on the wings of hell, these Zerg demons stormed the battlefield and left a tide of destruction and terror in their wake. As our psi blades clawed fruitlessly at the skies, as our strongest sublimated into clouds of smoke, as our fields became furiously drenched in blue fluids, our people turned to skies and cried. And an angel answered.

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The demons of the skies.

This glorious Revolutionist descended from above and approached me. He had a grand scheme to turn the tide of the Swarm, and he needed me, needed my creation. A fire burned so brightly in his eyes, the same fire long extinguished in the eyes of our weary countrymen, and I could not help but consent. As he turned to leave, I asked for his name. “Bisu,” he replied, and walked into the darkness.

The following revolution was swift and brutal. The swarm was completely unprepared; their wings were broken and their Messiah was crucified. As the Dark Templar ravaged silently the battlegrounds, I could proudly look to the skies and see a fleet of my own creation soar victoriously above. And as I watched, my heart lifted up and followed them into the clouds.

Those were the glory days, where, led by the Revolutionist, legendary commanders left their footprints in the sands of time. The sea of Zerg parted before our might, and as we looked to the future, we said with confidence, “Victory after victory.” But in our finest hour, the wheel of destiny turned yet again. A new Tyrant had claimed the throne of the Swarm, and all of the fire, ferocity, and thirst for conquest in the galaxy condensed into his powerful eyes. Our people pleaded for our warrior kings to once again rise up and take arms, to fight against the storm and the sea as they had so gallantly in the past. But their eyes were weary and their wills were weak, for a great change had rocked the universe. The frozen gods had lifted their mighty hands, and, in a powerful Blizzard, buried our dragoons and war bringers in an icy tomb. And my most prized creation was, too, wrested from my grasp and lost inside the storm of change.

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The Blizzard of change.

While the old kings were defeated under the fearsome gaze of the Tyrant, our research facilities hustled to churn out new technologies that would replace those lost in the Blizzard. But, while the clamorous sound of work rang clear through the labs, my heart was sullen, for none could replace the majesty I had created and lost. As I worked, resigned, on a new air superiority fighter, I remembered long ago that young Revolutionist who approached me, and, with all the fire and hope in the world in his eyes, asked for my assistance. His memory fueled my passion, and, as my third and final creation took flight, I could see him looking down on me from the skies with that same victorious gaze. My youngest child, you rose from the ashes of the lost, and were born anew, just as I had hoped, and continue to dream, that a certain old Revolutionist would. And so, in memory of my lost creation, in memory of the lost Revolutionist, I called you the “Phoenix.”

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Rise again, my child...

I had originally equipped the Phoenix with an “overload,” to fight with the fury of the old kings. But the frozen gods were displeased. They shunned my design, and smote my child with wobbly wings. Unwieldy and fragile, my Phoenix resembled more my first failed creation than my second. Undeterred, I fought for my son, equipped him with a graviton beam, and prayed to the gods for assistance. They turned their backs and my pleas fell upon deaf ears. As the newborn colossi first stretched their arachnid legs and the immortals raised their hardened shells, I watched in agony as my last creation flailed clumsily through the air. Little did I know, someone else was watching, too.

As a child, this young priest watched my Corsairs pillage the skies, and desired wings of his own. And as the icy storm of change buried my child, so too did it bury the dreams of the priest. So, he fought for me, fought for my child, with prayer upon eloquent prayer to the frozen gods. And they answered his call.

One dark night, while I slept in my laboratory, a chill gale blew through the cracks and crevices of the doors and walls, rocking the very foundations of the facility. Groggily, I looked up to see my Phoenix humming, vibrating. Slowly at first, it began to rise, casting an eerie shadow across the ground. Alarmed, I quickly rose to confront the rogue pilot, but as I peered into the glass, I froze in horror. I saw nothing inside.

And I could do nothing as my last creation quickly accelerated through the roof and flew away...

~~~~~

In the twilight, I walk again through these jungle ruins. The serpent vines and tentacle roots still claw at my feet, binding the stones to the ground. I look up to see a Kakaru soar overhead, as it had when I was a child. Instead, I see a pilotless robotic fleet, ghost ships circling the dim clouds.

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Where have the Kakaru gone?


Chapter Four: Gulliver's Travels
(A story of the maps of the world)

My name is Gulliver. I am a cartographer aboard the legendary scientific explorer vessel Magellan, and it is my job to map the corners of the virgin galaxy. The world of Starcraft is brimming with strange and exotic unexplored territory just waiting to be discovered. I will tell you of my travels.

April 2503 – the treasure hunt. We received a call from the Dominion. Something about gold and riches beyond our wildest imaginations. And a small alien artifact. Apparently, these were all the rage. Our captain was a righteous and stalwart man, well-versed in the ways of this world. Our crew was the most rag-tag and rowdy bunch of convicts, carpetbaggers, and space pirates to grace this side of Korhal. And so, we set off on our expedition with high hopes and an overflowing sense of adventure.

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Lost Temple:
Warm nostalgia filled our nostrils, penetrated the depths of our bones. The earth itself called to us, whispered hauntingly sweet in our ears. “I knew you’d be back.” We looked around this jungle landscape. The moss-covered ruins, ornate stones, wild grass almost seemed to look back, animated by some ghostly force. “I knew you’d be back.” We hurriedly unpacked our expedition gear and excavation equipment. Grabbing our blast torches and high-pressure drills, we clawed at the surface of this land, incising deep into its rocky skin. The ground around us moaned in agony. “I knew you’d be back.” We dug deeper and deeper. Our eyes sparkled with greedy golden brightness. Discovery was imminent, and there was no turning back. The earth trembled and cracked beneath our mechanical might. “I knew you’d be back.” We finally hit the core. Dust gathered in a billowing cloud around us. Fragments and heaps of sandstone and metal lay scattered across the site in disarray. Ashen-faced rainclouds clustered overhead, drizzling the world in their cold gray tears. And the earth spoke no more. For the Temple was nowhere to be found.

Kulas Ravine:
The air was hot and thick with buzzing insects. The trees unfurled their leafy branches to the sky, creating a lush and thick canopy that blotted out the sun. Here on the dark jungle floor, thick roots and muddy grass concealed a thousand and one jittery creatures below. We walked deeper and deeper into the forest's heart, gazing in awe at the grand ruin walls that rose up around us. The finely chiseled stones, the ornate carvings of some ancient civilization captured the very depths of our imagination. We stupid, oblivious sightseers were blind to the hunters’ eyes that peeped just over the tops of those temple ruins. Suddenly, the forest around us erupted in a storm of movement and cacophony. Colossal robots and primal warriors surrounded us, trapping our measly expedition force in an immobilizing blue stasis. We were marched to the natives’ camp, and the captain, ever calm, was unbound and brought before the tribunal. An eternity passed before he returned unscathed. “We head south,” he said simply. “To the desert sands.”

Desert Oasis:
The ancient pharaohs once ruled these burning dunes, caught in a terrifying battle with the demons of the earth. Now, nothing is left of that distant past. History is buried deep beneath the unchanging gray sands. What gemstones lay entombed beneath the scorching earth, our captain wouldn’t say. Still, we scoured the oddly hued sands, puddles of sweat swamping the damp interiors of our burning suits. But our laborious efforts were futile; there was nothing to be found in this desert wasteland. As we turned and headed back to the ship, I felt a small tug on my bootstrap. Turning sharply, I looked down and saw a brown and mottled skeletal hand clutching my foot. And upon the middle finger rested a golden ring that supported a sick and veined eyeball, shut forbiddingly tight. But something was eerily amiss. I bent down for closer inspection, grabbing the hand and lifting it out of its sandy catacombs. My eyes widened in surprise as a chill wave swept through my sweat-drenched body. The palm of the hand was gone, disintegrated into winds. A strange and terrible realization struck me: the shifting ground we stood upon was not composed of coarse, sandy grains. No – this barren landscape was a grim graveyard made from the ashen dust of the restless dead. My stomach turned, and my grip on the decayed fingers loosened. But the hand wouldn’t let go. Horrified, I tried desperately to shake it off. It flopped lifelessly to the ground and disappeared beneath the dust. Later that evening, in the safe comfort of the vessel, my pocket felt oddly weighted. Curious, I thrust in an unsuspecting hand. My fumbling fingers finally clamped on a small sphere, strangely wet and squishy. I slowly raised my trembling hand, and saw, in the center of my palm, the veined eyeball wide open and staring straight at me.

Blistering Sands:
We reached a vast desert empire nestled amidst the sweltering heat and blistering sands. Paved highways crisscrossed the golden dunes, dashing headlong through blasted backdoor boulders and running past the ever-vigilant watchtowers. Dusty bazaars and shady harems lined the streets, hosting a crowd of squabbling hagglers, inviting patrons, and fabulously adorned merchants with wide and toothy smiles. We were jostled amongst the frantic crowd, pushed this way and that by a myriad of colorful and revealing lace, heavy gray turbans, and sweaty bare bodies. The heat was oppressive. But what burdened me the most was the awkward lump that weighted down my coat pocket and pressed and bulged uncomfortably against my thigh. Just then, a mysterious raspy voice called to me. I turned, and seeing only a dark and unobtrusive vendor stall, pardoned myself from the exploration group and approached. The shop was well-shaded, with heavy cloth blanketing the ceiling from the sun’s penetrating rays. A tall and thickly turbaned man stood in the shadows behind the counter. I could not see his face. In that same heavily accented and raspy voice, he introduced himself. He was a treasure hunter in his younger days, and he had traveled the world many times over. Now, he made a living selling the finest treasure maps, and he had in his possession one that would be of great interest to the Dominion. At that, he reached under the many folds of his cloak and pulled out a wrinkled, yellow piece of parchment. Upon it was elaborately written in dark red ink “The Hearts of the Xel’Naga.” I regretfully informed him that I had no money, revealing my empty pockets as proof. But then, to my surprise and horror, the eyeball ring tumbled out and rolled slowly across the table. The shadowy merchant stiffened. Roughly, he grabbed my hand and forced the crumpled map into my palm. Then, snatching the wide-open eyeball from the counter, he briskly strode through rear flaps of the tent. And, as I turned to leave, I fancied I saw a strangely serpentine tail disappear through the fluttering of the exit.

May 2503 – into the inferno. The following month, we followed the map vigilantly, for we had no other leads. After all, the drawings were authentic, and the depiction was perfect. Our hopes remained high, despite our previous setbacks. Little did we know that we were tumbling headlong into the fires of hell.

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Scrap Station:
We came upon a small outpost docking station, the geographic terrain cutely sculpted into the silhouette of a ship. A layer of scattered junk and debris orbited this inconspicuous satellite town, testing our navigator’s fortitude. Running low on supplies, we landed for a brief pit stop and were accosted by an old and gruff engineer who grumbled something about “watching your steps” as we casually strolled into the city. The dim lights of a quaint and humble town welcomed us. All was peaceful and quiet. Eager to explore the nightlife, our crew split their separate ways, leaving me to roam the empty streets. And so I walked aimlessly through twisted alleys and corridors, innocent and unsuspecting. Little did I know that this unsuspicious junkyard station was one of the most rampant outlaw havens in the entire sector. And not even a thought of doubt or unease entered my mind as a loud thump resounded throughout my skull and the world went black and disappeared. I awoke much later to see the captain’s face hovering overhead in an expression of genuine concern. The back of my head throbbed uncontrollably, and I was mummified in bandages. To this day, the captain won’t speak of what happened in that shady little town. “You’re just lucky to be alive.”

Steppes of War:
Blood caked and splattered these blasted lands, submerging a valley of splintered bones in a sea of red. An uneasy silence hung like death, a fragile truce perpetually interrupted by the concussive boom of a siege tank merely a shot’s length away from the opposing natural. The chokes were walled and barricaded with rusty supply depots, exiling me to the tiny strip of ground between the offensive fronts known as no man’s land. Just a minute’s roundabout hike took me to a cobbled ledge. Peeping over the mighty rocks, I could just distinguish the burning bunkers and war-scarred trenches, housing dark and grim faces that gazed off into oblivion, into the eyes of death. “Nothing to see here,” the captain muttered, letting a heavy and solemn hand fall stiff on my shoulder. As we gunned our engines and lifted ourselves out of this hell, I looked down and saw the damned raise their wretched arms, clawing at the sky. The “Steppes of War,” indeed.

Metalopolis:
The cityscape breached the night sky, steel teeth gnawing away at the clouds. These majestic spires, white lights ablaze, beckoned us, mesmerized us like the Sirens of Odysseus’s stormy seas, urging us to take a closer look. And so we followed these bright and flaming beacons, edging closer until the towers rose like mountains beside our ship. So small indeed did I feel amongst man’s grand design – the flickering neon signs, the windows gleaming and sleek upon mighty pillars of black iron. And so, we watched the looming walls enclose us, swallow us, consume us in complete and awe-struck silence. Then, a moonbeam knifed through the dazzling spectacle of bright color and pitch black shadow, revealing a grotesque and contorted tentacle dripping in ooze and toxic fluid. The urban landscape suddenly burst into a fury of monstrous and putrid jittery infestation, as if awakened by some great and silent alarm. Masks of horror contorted our features as we saw the metropolis for what it truly was: a festering and wretched hive, a hatching ground for the disgusting newborn Zerg. Desperation pumped deep through our veins as we flew higher and higher, a horde of slimy tentacles shooting behind. Never shall I forget the creep-covered windows or the thousands upon thousands of mutated eyes. Never shall I forget the City of the Zerg.

Incineration Zone:
The heat was stifling, unbearable, even, as we at last landed haphazardly atop the molten earth, our final destination. Lava seeped through the cracks in the brimstone beneath our feet, singeing our travel-worn boots and biting our heels like thousands of flaming vipers. Not a living soul could be found in this desolate maze. The narrow stone walls stifled and enclosed us, sapped us of our strength, robbed us of our sanity. The only water lay in the rivers of lava that encircled us. All else was charred sand and ash-covered stones. Much was our surprise when a rustling sound scattered the pebbles nearby. And out slowly crawled a pitiful and lonesome Zergling, bruised and burnt from this flaming dungeon. Staring at us imploringly with scared, doe-like eyes, it seemed almost human. Almost. The marine to my right quickly and brutally gunned it down, spraying our grimy visors and suits with a mist of blood. It didn’t even let out a cry of despair as it writhed painfully on the smoky ground, the light fast fading from its forlorn eyes. And we turned and walked away. Such is how the mind is warped upon entering the labyrinth of hell.

June 2503 – epilogue. Thus ends our two months of fruitless searching, and our exploration of this new and fantastic world. Though our adventures were many, our successes were few, and we returned to the Dominion empty handed. But that is not to say that nothing has changed. For we have braved the hive of villains, the land of the dead, the heart of the Zerg, and the very fires of hell itself. Creases of sorrow and despair have slowly crept their way across our features. And as we depart this inconspicuous June day, I sense a darkness, a despair and unrest that has filled the depths of every man’s heart.

[image loading]

Leaving the Heart of Darkness.


Chapter Five: B.Net 1.984
(A story of the future of Battle.net)

It was a bright cold day in April, and the clocks were striking thirteen. Stumbling quickly across the dust covered patchwork streets, Winston)Smith approached a rusted and wind-battered shack. His head was tucked deeply inside a heavily worn gray coat, sparsely sheltered from the dirt and debris the all too frequent gusts of wind would toss at his tightly closed eyes and mouth. He fumbled with the door – the knob was loose and desperately needed a replacement – and lurched inside.

The shack consisted of a single tiny room, sparsely furnished. A flimsy desk sat somewhat erect in the center, accompanied by a lopsided stool, while a single grimy mattress hugged a shadowy corner. A dull and dusty screen was built into a side wall, easily overlooking the entire room. It was turned on, as always, projecting a simple middle-aged man reading a list of names and numbers. Pasted roughly against the far wall opposite the door was an enormous and intimidating poster featuring a well-groomed and bearded face. Underneath was a message written in big bold letters. “ACTIVISION BLIZZARD IS WATCHING YOU.”

This was home. There were many more just like it. They littered the colorless and dusty streets, sprawling eternally across the flattened soil. No one knew where these shacks began, or where they stopped. A common rumor, a widely held belief was that there was in fact no end; that the shacks continued on and on in a massive circle, covering the surface of the land and back again. And each person had his own shack. Or, rather, each person was allotted a shack. It would be wrong for him to call it his “own” – a crime, even. For nothing belonged to him. The shack, the single mattress, the tattered clothes on his back, the very creations of his fragile mind; none of it was his.

[image loading]

Home, sweet home.

Each shack was the same. Each contained a single mattress, desk, chair, screen, and poster, and each reeked of sweat and despair. The only difference was the doors; upon some, a glaring red “X” was painted. No one knew what this meant, but it was in one’s best interest to ask no questions. There were no two room shacks or three room shacks. The rule was strict and simple: one shack, one body. More than one body would lead to conversations, gossip, idle chatter, and more than one conversation would lead to sloth, lawlessness, anarchy. Silence was a virtue. The walls, flimsy barriers against the endless rain and sleet and snow, were curiously reinforced to withstand one thing – sound. To discuss matters of business, one had to trudge on foot for miles, possibly, to find a coworker. No local area transportation network existed. It would be too exploitable, the party said. And so, an eerie silence hung over the wretched streets and shacks, only broken intermittently by the lonesome howl of the wind or the distant scuffle of well-worn boots.

Winston)Smith looked up at the screen. The program had changed; it was now flashing a black and white war film, and the sound of muted gunshots and explosives reverberated softly inside the silent room. Eurasian bodies, riddled with bullets and shrapnel, littered the battlefield as a calm and even voice steadily narrated the scene. Something about victory in Europe or Asia or Oceania, somewhere so remote and far away, no one really knew if it existed at all. In fact, nothing was known outside this single territory of scattered shacks save what was shown upon that dusty flashing screen. But Winston)Smith wasn’t listening; his thoughts had drifted to what had happened at work this peculiar morning...

Sparsely scattered amongst the sea of shacks were enormous grim factories abutting coal mines and brimstone quarries. Towering smokestacks sprouted from the rooftops, belching cloud after cloud of grime and smog above the windowless concrete walls. Each was given a name such as Medivac Alamo or Lurker Sigma, and each operated with the same raw efficiency, consuming the same amount of coal, and generating the same amount of energy, regardless of the strength, determination, and competency of the throng of faceless men that tended to the smoky beast from within. Among these was Winston)Smith. Or Winston)Smith.491, to be precise. For names were not unique; uniqueness was a sin, an evil that bred corruption and discontent. There was no place for such radical and dangerous ideals.

As the clock struck twelve, an obnoxious-sounding siren blared from the speakers spread throughout the complex. It was time for the Two Minutes Hate. The massive screen on the front wall of the factory flickered, projecting a blood red backdrop. The workers gathered round like blind and faithful sheep flocking to a crimson shepherd. To Winston’s immediate left stood a short and fervent shrew of a woman, one of those who worshiped the party with all of her heart. To his right was a massive man whose face radiated a quiet and reserved intelligence ill-suited to his grappling physique. His name was Rotick, a prominent figure of the party, an overseer of this sector who ever so rarely would drop by for an inspection. But, Winston knew deep down, instinctively, even, that there was something unsettling, something not quite right about this man. Something more. The siren stopped and gave way to a calm and droning voice that belonged to a curly haired man who now contrasted sharply the red background. His nose was pointed and angular and his mouth was contorted into a silly, stupid smile that matched his bright and beady eyes. He was ranting about the insurgency and the lies of Activision Blizzard, advocating dangerous rebellious ideals: freedom of speech and freedom of thought. But nobody was listening. A great hissing erupted unanimously from the faceless crowd, with scattered boos tossed around with the utmost zeal. The droning voice was quickly drowned amidst the tidal uproar as fists of outrage were raised and small objects were hurled at the screen. Marching boots and deafening gunshots joined the din, resonating from the battalion of twenty foot Eurasian soldiers that had appeared on screen behind the massive profile. Several of the crowd, including the tiny woman to Winston)Smith’s left, shrunk in fear. Others, consumed by blinding rage, yelled and swore and went into a frenzy. Even the giant Rotick to Winston’s right, normally calm and collected, was choked with anger, his face veined and purplish red. And, as the head on the screen gradually mutated into the grotesque visage of a Zerg overlord, Winston found himself inescapably drawn to the rage and hate that suffocated the entire building. Was image on the screen a face or an alien? Winston could no longer tell, so blinded by emotion was he. And who could resist? For so fearsome a power bonded the souls of the frenzied workers and kindled and stoked the wildfires that enflamed their hearts that they kicked and shouted and screamed as one fearsome beast, one single wild and burning conflagration guided by hands unseen.

But as Winston hurled flaming verbal javelins at the gruesome specter that still grinned stupidly from the screen, it dawned upon him that his cries of anger and hate and incredulity were directed not at the infuriating propaganda, but rather at the party itself. He hated the slummy and unkempt streets, the never ending food rations, the dingy shack allocated to him. He hated the oppressive silence, the mind-wrenching rumors and secrets, and the furiously mundane life he lived. He hated Activision Blizzard. And so he welled up all of the remorse, despair, and fervent passion that dwelled within his breast and, in this single minute, unleashed it upon the world.

[image loading]

The Two Minutes Hate

Finally, the grotesque figure softly melted into a calm and reassuring face that exuded peace and stability, the same face plastered across the countless posters that littered the populace. A wave of relief swept across the crowd, and an audible sigh could be heard. The crowd applauded and cheered, and the shrewish woman to Winston’s left curled up in a small ball and burst into tears. Their savior had come. Slowly, the crowd broke into a low chant. “A-B! …A-B!” And Wilson followed suit. But something caught the corner of his eye, a glimmer perhaps, or maybe just the simple certain and inescapable feeling that his attention was required. He turned, half-expectant, to meet the intense and probing gaze of Rotick, staring straight into the depths of his soul. Those eyes, two glassy portals into worlds beyond comprehension, reflected wisdom, knowledge, and understanding. Grasping Winton’s burning mind, those yawning pupils pulled and tugged at Winston’s desires and fantasies. And for once, he dared to dream. For the first time, he saw the world with clarity. Europe and Asia and Oceania, they really existed. The party was on the cusp of a new local area transportation network that they had long ago tossed with the ideological rubbish of the past. Though they lived in the gray twilight hours, a new and golden dawn awaited just beyond the horizon. And with it lay change and freedom and a new beginning. Soon, the world would be silent no more.

The morning shift came to a quiet and unremarkable end. Winston and Rotick parted without exchanging a single syllable, for such was the silent bond between the two men, the unspoken understanding that transcended mere words. They were brothers for the same unmentionable cause, fighters wrapped in the same unremarkable drab and colorless guise of a comrade of the party. Change was just around the corner.

Winston snapped back to reality. It was a mere hour since those events transpired, and the eyes brimming with forbidden knowledge still burned clearly in his mind. He looked with utter disgust upon his repulsive soiled cot and ramshackle furniture. A cockroach scuttled across the bare dirt floor, just out of Winston’s reach. The stench of sweat and despair was suddenly unbearably noticeable, choking his mind and clouding his senses. He flung himself outside in a coughing fit, stumbling painfully across the scattered litter and debris. Looking up to the cloudless gray and open sky, he fancied a bold ray of sunshine pierced the impenetrable layer of smog that hung so stiflingly overhead. And for the second time in his life, Winston)Smith dared to dream. He saw the imminent change, the incredible future, the wonderful truth suppressed beneath a layer of oppression and silence and solitude. A burst of inspiration seized his fevered mind, penetrated the core of his frontal lobe, tugged at the fringes of his sanity. Inexorably, his mouth opened, and a rumbling overtook his vocal cords. He knew what was coming and couldn’t stop it; he didn’t want to stop it. It was inevitable. With a mouth open wide, he mustered all of the hope and dreams that resided in his soul. “Down with Activision Blizzard! Down with Activision Blizzard! Down with Activision Blizzard…”

No sooner had those words escaped his lips than a dark and heavy hand fell upon his shoulder. A shiver shook his entire body as he twirled to confront this unsuspecting assailant. And he met a countenance so horribly contorted, an expression so astonishingly twisted that, upon first impulse, he believed this disfigured face to be the face of a complete stranger. The face of Rotick. His pupils, once unfathomable pools of knowledge, now radiated only mindless rapacious hunger, an insatiable desire for unimaginable suffering. A spasm of pain shot through Winston’s shoulder, and he dropped to the ground in a fetal ball and saw no more.

It was a bright cold day in April, and the clocks were striking thirteen. The wind howled furiously, battering row after endless row of dilapidated shacks that stretched endlessly across this gray and sullen expanse. A massive and well-built man, dressed smartly in the tidy but colorless garb of the upper party, trudged through the filthy streets. His cap was pulled low to screen the dirt and dust the wind flung mercilessly at his shadowed face, and his gray cloak was wrapped tightly around his bulky figure. Passing an unremarkable shack, he paused. Its door bore a blood red “X.” The door that once led to the abode of Winston)Smith.491. The dark man gave a slight nod of approval, and a tiny grin crept across his stolid countenance, for he knew that inside fluttered a single piece of paper, upon which was written a single word: “BANNED.”

And he walked away.

[image loading]

The end.


Chapter Six: The Little Pony
(A story of the community)

Once upon a time, there was a little pony. He wasn’t your ordinary little pony, though. Every day, at around sunrise, when the sun first stretched and unfurled its soft and yellow rays onto the peaceful world below, while the other little ponies were still drowsy with sleep, he would quietly don his warm scarf and steal off into the distant woods. None of the other ponies could read his heart, understand his unfettered spirit. “He is just an eccentric,” they would mutter with sleep-laden eyes, “Better for us all that we stay as far away as possible.” Little could they imagine the exciting and far-off places that lone little pony dared venture to explore, often absent for days, even weeks at a time. But when that little pony would finally return, body dreadfully weary yet eyes brimming with golden excitement, he would chatter tirelessly, for hours upon end, of the strange and exotic sights and sounds he encountered. The other ponies, busily munching the dewy grass, simply nodded in silence, for they had much better things to do than to indulge in the fantasies of a wild dreamer.

[image loading]

All alone...

Those down-to-earth ponies couldn’t begin to fathom the pain and hardships the little pony experienced while chasing the sky, the heavens. Spiny thickets and muddy sinkholes littered the rocky path, and more often than not, he was caked in grime and covered in bruises upon his arrival. And, all too frequently, that little dreamer would stumble, breathless but with soaring spirits, to his final destination, only to find it barren and deserted, and infested with weeds and stones. With crestfallen eyes and head hung low, the miserable little pony would slowly and resignedly lope back to his mellow home, quietly dreading the stinging silence and turned backs that awaited him. But the little pony never lost sight of his dreams. He would explore the ends of the earth, and tell his friends of the wonders that lay beyond in hopes that, one day, he would awaken in their hearts the adventurer’s spirit that so consumed and blazed in his own. And maybe, just maybe, they could one day find and unfurl their downy wings and soar together amongst the wind-swept clouds. Such was the fantasy of a dreamer.

One unsuspecting day, a deadly frost swept through the peaceful meadows, crystallizing the grassy fields in a blanket of icy white. Hungry and blue with cold, the ponies wandered aimlessly about their once so familiar home, now so harsh and unwelcoming. Day after starving day passed, but the diamond ice refused to thaw. Distraught, the frostbitten herd turned to their little dreamer, asking, imploring him to lead them into worlds anew. Taken aback, the bashful little pony reluctantly consented, and, as one, they headed off into the frozen woods.

The journey to their promised land was not an easy one. Sleeted stones and partially iced rivers littered their path ahead as hungry beasts gathered and lurked in the shadows behind with eager mouths salivating at the thought of the inevitable straggler. Other countless alien ponies joined the pack, seeking refuge from the cold, or possibly just sharing that very same spirit of adventure that tugged at their heartstrings. Most were friendly, amiable, and offered valuable insight for traversing the untamed wilds that lay ahead; others were merely a burden, slowing the herd and whittling away at the already scant provisions. Cold and exhausted, many simply fell to their wobbly knees, resigning their life to the frigid tomb of the earth. But the little pony and his pack resolutely marched ahead, stubbornly weathering the biting winds that cut the eyes and skin and the icicle stones that chaffed and chipped the hooves.

Finally, the tattered and beaten entourage arrived upon a lone majestic hill unblemished amongst the blizzard that raged below. And upon that hill grew the most ripe and delicious snowy fruit the ponies had ever seen, the fruit of the storm. Hungry mouths open wide, the ponies rushed forward and feasted to their hearts content. And, no sooner had they taken a single bite than a miraculous change swept over the dreary frost-covered plains. The ice melted and thawed, revealing the most verdant dew-bound grass and the brightest and most colorful flowers their doe eyes had ever seen. The trees yawned and stretched their weary branches as the world was bathed in a beauty and glory previously unknown to man and beast. And, as the sun shone warm and soft on the weary backs of the wide-eyed ponies, pairs of dove-like wings slowly budded and took form. Slowly, hesitantly at first, they flapped their angels’ guise, wobbly hovering to and fro. Then, with the crimson adventurer’s spirit ablaze in each of their breasts, the little winged ponies, as one, took to the skies and soared amongst the clouds, eager to explore this marvelous land, this brave new world, anew.


[image loading]


The gods gazed down from their frozen thrones, their icy pupils piercing the clouds below. Nothing escaped their eagles’ eyes; the powerful Dominion, the bastard race, the winged ghosts, the untamed lands, the world of oppression, the ponies that breached the clouds – they saw it all. From their glorious heights, they saw the world, their child, their own creation, as no other could. No mortal could fathom, could even begin to wrap his feeble mind around the complex beauty and harmony that pervaded the ragtag landscape. Indeed, the future showed bright on the crystal eyes of the snowy gods. They saw with clarity what lay ahead, the wonder and grace that nothing but countless fruitful years could make apparent to the skeptical mortals below. But even a god can live a doubter’s life when holding the world twixt the glassy lens of the unbeliever.

And a god can hope. Twelve years ago, they created perfection itself. By chance or by ingenious design, they sculpted a world so beautifully complete that it rivaled the heavens. And as hope raised its infant head, as necessity reached forth a forlorn hand, the gods knew perfection would once again cast its long and glorious rays. On the twelfth year, the frozen gods cracked the earth and skies, and the world beneath their feet was torn asunder. And they saw that it was good.




Huge thanks to Photoshop God keit for the amazing banner.


Images from:
+ Show Spoiler +
Sexy banner by resident TL Photoshop god keit
God of War: Mount Olympus Concept Art
Blizzard's Amazing Starcraft 2 Artwork Gallery
Googling "Phoenix Fantasy" gave me this awesome picture
Jungle Ruins by Greg Barley
Phantom Moon over Twilight Beach by SkillZombie
Water in the Heart of Darkness Area, uploaded by Redemption
From the Outside on the Frozen Kennebec
From the 1984 movie
Photoshopped Battle.net Login Screen
Mount Olympus by *andyparkart
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Bill Murray
Profile Blog Joined October 2009
United States9292 Posts
Last Edited: 2010-07-20 07:20:43
July 20 2010 07:20 GMT
#2
jeez lots to read

edit: i wonder if i can finish this before proleague lol
University of Kentucky Basketball #1
1a2a3aPro
Profile Joined July 2009
Canada227 Posts
Last Edited: 2010-07-20 07:21:54
July 20 2010 07:20 GMT
#3
... Second. Totally not first. Never been first on a news item =( ... *sniffle*

Will read when I have some time

User was warned for this post
Heyoka
Profile Blog Joined March 2008
Katowice25012 Posts
July 20 2010 07:24 GMT
#4
This is one of the best things I've read on TL, its been a pleasure to see it come along and I'm excited to see it as a finished product.

Great work Saracen!
@RealHeyoka | ESL / DreamHack StarCraft Lead
Blixy213
Profile Blog Joined May 2010
United States360 Posts
July 20 2010 07:25 GMT
#5
Amazing read, thanks for posting!
I really love your write ups, they always give me lots to think about when beta is down.
#1 sKyHigh and MorroW fan. "Should have stayed in the bush, bush reaper."
Xxio
Profile Blog Joined July 2009
Canada5565 Posts
Last Edited: 2010-07-20 07:27:46
July 20 2010 07:26 GMT
#6
Amazing job, really incredible to read. I'm going to get a cup of tea and enjoy this.
KTY
CursOr
Profile Blog Joined January 2009
United States6335 Posts
Last Edited: 2010-07-20 08:04:14
July 20 2010 07:38 GMT
#7
I have seen a lot of brilliant shit on TL.

This is a work of art. Brilliant literary references... totally amazing insights to each patch from each race... wonderful pictures. It walks that fine line between Orchestration and Chaos... abstract and concrete... that really... really is something...

There really isn't enough to say about this. It's unreal.

I know genius when I see it, and this is genius.
(not only because 2 of the main references are my favorite books )
CJ forever (-_-(-_-(-_-(-_-)-_-)-_-)-_-)
Gonff
Profile Joined May 2010
United States686 Posts
July 20 2010 07:38 GMT
#8
wow that was fun! Your writing style is hopelessly cheesy but works great because of how genuine you are. Liked the community part the best *happytear* :'-)
Niten
Profile Blog Joined October 2009
United States598 Posts
Last Edited: 2010-07-20 16:59:42
July 20 2010 07:39 GMT
#9
I am checking this crazy late but am awestruck by the sheer look of this, which almost undoubtedly means reading it is going to be something like a written clean clear fresh breath of air.

I'll edit my post when I wake up to say what I think after having read the article.

Edit:
I loved the first three chapters on the Terran, Zerg, and Protoss. Those were awesome! The Bnet 1984 was insightful; damn, that image of the huts and the descriptions of the shacks are so spot on. It, like the work it paradigms, gives me a chilling sense of dread for Bnet and the future.

And I'm proud to consider myself one of those little ponies that joined the flock. (awwwwwww)
Korra: "Ok, I know that I'm not good at emotions, but that's what Tenzin's gonna teach me, right? He's gonna teach me to be happy and gentle and spiritual, and the rest of that bullsh**t."
Stealthpenguin
Profile Joined April 2010
Finland393 Posts
July 20 2010 07:41 GMT
#10
this is just brilliant
pieisamazing
Profile Joined May 2009
United States1234 Posts
July 20 2010 07:41 GMT
#11
sweet christ, this is the longest thing ever

i cant finish it tonight.. -_-
connoisseur
Art.FeeL
Profile Blog Joined September 2007
1163 Posts
July 20 2010 07:44 GMT
#12
Now seriously, this is awesome. Such a good writer are you Saracen. Did you invent those poems all alone? Fcking awesome. keep up the good work
I am a great believer in luck. The harder I work the luckier I am.
butchji
Profile Joined September 2009
Germany1531 Posts
July 20 2010 07:44 GMT
#13
On July 20 2010 16:25 Blixy wrote:
Amazing read, thanks for posting!
I really love your write ups, they always give me lots to think about when beta is down.


How did you read all this in six minutes?
Iplaythings
Profile Blog Joined August 2009
Denmark9110 Posts
July 20 2010 07:56 GMT
#14
Amazing read, absolutely silly amount of chineese wall texts!
In the woods, there lurks..
Jakalo
Profile Blog Joined March 2009
Latvia2350 Posts
July 20 2010 08:03 GMT
#15
Ohh, 1984 Blizzard impersination is perfect, as is the rest of it, great job.
Nostalgia is not as good as it used to be.
omninmo
Profile Blog Joined April 2008
2349 Posts
Last Edited: 2010-07-20 08:07:02
July 20 2010 08:06 GMT
#16
impressive write-up.
im staring at my computer screen now wondering what to do without sc2.
guess ill play some dota?
OminouS
Profile Joined February 2010
Sweden1343 Posts
July 20 2010 08:09 GMT
#17
If only news articles could be written like this. I enjoy the effort for sure.
On the 6th day JF made Reavers and on the 7th day JF put his opponent to rest
pencilcase
Profile Joined September 2007
United States330 Posts
July 20 2010 08:13 GMT
#18
Wow, amazing effort and incredible dedication!
NIIINO
Profile Blog Joined July 2010
Slovakia1320 Posts
July 20 2010 08:13 GMT
#19
impressive ! i dont need newspapers i got this !
Agama
Profile Blog Joined May 2010
United States72 Posts
July 20 2010 08:14 GMT
#20
Amazing read

I loved the Rise of the Phoenix story.
sk`
Profile Joined November 2008
Japan442 Posts
July 20 2010 08:18 GMT
#21
I read the whole thing... wtf!?

I'm impressed and bewildered all at once.
www.pureesports.com
jodogohoo
Profile Blog Joined March 2008
Canada2533 Posts
July 20 2010 08:29 GMT
#22
T_T
GhoSt[shield]
Profile Blog Joined April 2010
Canada2131 Posts
July 20 2010 08:38 GMT
#23
Excellent Read Sir!
The work and detail you put in is very commendable and impressive. Probably the longest read on TL for me to date and the most exciting. As a Zerg, Metalopolis feels like home when playing it, really felt you had it spot on in the description. Looking forward to your excellent contributions!
slowmanrunning
Profile Joined March 2010
Canada285 Posts
July 20 2010 08:54 GMT
#24
loved the rise of the phoenix story, and the golden boy terran one.

Makes me want a starcraft novel
I aim to become a hydralisk and then stop posting, cause I don't wanna be a queen...
Crazypyro1
Profile Joined May 2010
United States446 Posts
July 20 2010 08:55 GMT
#25
I shed a tear reading the zerg poem. Also I <3 Metalopolis.
Tufas
Profile Blog Joined April 2010
Austria2259 Posts
July 20 2010 09:01 GMT
#26
This proves one more time that teamliquid is the most awesome site there is. Thank you for all your hard work..... just for me, to read this. I honestly feel honored that someone would write this article in his freetime... that is just incredible. Really.
Where is my ACE flair
Kezaya
Profile Joined July 2010
1 Post
July 20 2010 09:05 GMT
#27
some people have too much time on their hands

User was banned for this post.
starfries
Profile Blog Joined July 2009
Canada3508 Posts
July 20 2010 09:18 GMT
#28
long but beautifully written, well worth staying up to read
DJ – do you like ramen, Savior? Savior – not really. Bisu – I eat it often. Flash – I’m a maniac! | Foxer Fighting!
Turbo.Tactics
Profile Joined April 2010
Germany675 Posts
July 20 2010 09:37 GMT
#29
On July 20 2010 17:55 Crazypyro1 wrote:
I shed a tear reading the zerg poem. Also I <3 Metalopolis.


You with your probe picture may have "shed a tear" Mr. Protoss Sir, I as a Zerg have cried like a baby...

Saracens best work besides the "How to play Zerg-cartoon" (still waiting for it to continue).
Keep 'em coming!
Zerg - because Browders sons hate 'em
flamewheel
Profile Blog Joined December 2009
FREEAGLELAND26781 Posts
July 20 2010 09:38 GMT
#30
Remember when I said you were my hero?

I meant it.
Writerdamn, i was two days from retirement
scrdmnttr
Profile Joined May 2010
United States96 Posts
July 20 2010 09:39 GMT
#31
I must commend your collosal efforts. An absolutely delightful read. It really summarizes the beta experience for a lot of us.
Crushgroove
Profile Joined July 2010
United States793 Posts
July 20 2010 09:41 GMT
#32
Truly a masterpiece. Well done, impressed in many ways. Creative and insightful, entertaining and provocative. Keep it up.
[In Korea on Vaca] "Why would I go to the park and climb a mountain? There are video games on f*cking TV!" - Kazuke
lycheejello
Profile Joined June 2010
United States59 Posts
July 20 2010 09:43 GMT
#33
haha this made my day (after having it destroyed by the end of beta)

i knew there was a reason i had to read george orwell's 1984 in high school

AlecPyron
Profile Joined May 2010
United States131 Posts
July 20 2010 09:49 GMT
#34
Very impressive! Dunno why, but I expected to see Kotick's face in that 1984 image.
zul
Profile Blog Joined February 2010
Germany5427 Posts
July 20 2010 09:58 GMT
#35
man, how long did it take you to write this? anyways - it was worth it
keep it deep! @zulison
Ventil
Profile Blog Joined June 2010
Sweden414 Posts
July 20 2010 10:02 GMT
#36
Fantastic work
Only bad thing was that my coffee was dead-cold once I had read it all
Twitter: @VeNtiLSC
Fates
Profile Joined June 2010
United States91 Posts
July 20 2010 10:06 GMT
#37
So much to read, yet all worth it! Especially liked the zerg bit.

Well done.
InfiniteIce
Profile Blog Joined May 2010
United States794 Posts
July 20 2010 10:09 GMT
#38
SARACEN!!!

I love this article ))))))))))

Seriously. I'm trying to watch proleague but i..can't..stop..reading!

<3
i keep going back to my response to chill's fake PM and laughing, then immediately getting a feeling that i assume i'd get if i had an orgasm and the girl said "hahaha guess what i have a dick" -FakeSteve
Angryhorse
Profile Joined January 2010
Sweden387 Posts
July 20 2010 10:22 GMT
#39
Good Job man!
Don't cry blood, the world doesn't revolve around you
Hagan
Profile Joined February 2010
Luxembourg34 Posts
July 20 2010 10:34 GMT
#40
WOW! There went a lot of effort and detail into those! Great read and absolutely loved the Zerg Poem

Thank you sir for making my day!
snotboogie
Profile Blog Joined August 2009
Australia3550 Posts
July 20 2010 10:39 GMT
#41
Insane. Great work, sir.
Zemtex
Profile Joined April 2010
Sweden31 Posts
July 20 2010 10:41 GMT
#42
Impressive Loved it all but my two favorites are Chapter One and Five. =)
Athene's Theory of Everything... Watch this Documentary. It will Blow your Mind... http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dbh5l0b2-0o
Puglet
Profile Joined June 2010
South Africa78 Posts
July 20 2010 10:48 GMT
#43
Fantastic.
Particularly liked chapter 2's poem. Oh how the great have fallen :'(
Keep up the great work

Navane
Profile Blog Joined February 2007
Netherlands2747 Posts
July 20 2010 11:52 GMT
#44
We need a pdf release for this. I want to read this printed out.
TBO
Profile Joined September 2009
Germany1350 Posts
July 20 2010 12:00 GMT
#45
Is there a specific reason why it is : Winston)Smith.491

I can't see any meaning in that number but there might be something hidden. I am just wondering because in the original he is 6079 (see chapter 3 when he has to do stretches in front of the telescreen). Obviously 6079 wouldn't work because identifier are just 3 digits but there might be more to it.

Really enjoyed all the stories, even the poem despite being not too much into poetry.
RoieTRS
Profile Blog Joined July 2008
United States2569 Posts
July 20 2010 12:04 GMT
#46
People still play sc2?
konadora, in Racenilatr's blog: "you need to stop thinking about starcraft or anything computer-related for that matter. It's becoming a bad addiction imo"
oxidized
Profile Blog Joined January 2009
United States324 Posts
July 20 2010 12:06 GMT
#47
Holy crap, you are writing articles all over the place. Lots of free time at home?
They're all really good though.
Nyovne
Profile Joined March 2006
Netherlands19133 Posts
July 20 2010 12:23 GMT
#48
Sick shit can't believe I read it all but it was so worth it, cheers!
ModeratorFor remember, that in the end, some are born to live, others born to die. I belong to those last, born to burn, born to cry. For I shall remain alone... forsaken.
DropTester
Profile Joined April 2010
Australia608 Posts
July 20 2010 12:25 GMT
#49
really good and interesting story, love reading about game lore
bITt.mAN
Profile Blog Joined March 2009
Switzerland3693 Posts
July 20 2010 12:35 GMT
#50
Wow thanks, this is great!

Now I definitely have something to read on the plane to Japan
BW4LYF . . . . . . PM me, I LOVE PMs. . . . . . Long live "NaDa's Body" . . . . . . Fantasy | Bisu/Best | Jaedong . . . . .
Ciryandor
Profile Blog Joined May 2010
United States3735 Posts
July 20 2010 12:50 GMT
#51
Should have been WinstonSmitch451; would have been more appropriate considering this: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Farenheit_451 unless I'm missing something else entirely.
에일리 and 아이유 <3 - O Captain 박재혁 ・゚✧*:・*゚+..。✧・゚:*・..。 ✧・゚ :・゚* ゜・*:・ ✧・゚:・゚:.。 ✧・゚ SPARKULING ・゜・:・゚✧*:・゚✧。*゚+..。 ✧・゚: ✧・゚:*・゜・:・゚✧*::
MangoTango
Profile Blog Joined June 2010
United States3670 Posts
Last Edited: 2010-07-20 13:00:04
July 20 2010 12:59 GMT
#52
Sir, I must protest. Zergs do not write poetry.

Edit: but srsly, pretty funny.
"One fish, two fish, red fish, BLUE TANK!" - Artosis
jtype
Profile Blog Joined April 2009
England2167 Posts
July 20 2010 13:08 GMT
#53
Wow! A lot of work must have gone into this one. A very entertaining read and one that I'll definitely return to.

Thanks for all the effort that went into this, though I suspect you had a lot of fun writing it.
R0YAL
Profile Blog Joined September 2009
United States1768 Posts
July 20 2010 13:16 GMT
#54
Your a super human arnt u Saracen? ;p
Absence of evidence is not evidence of absence.
Count9
Profile Blog Joined May 2009
China10928 Posts
July 20 2010 13:21 GMT
#55
Wow, that's a bunch of stuff... I've only read half of it and I'm already remembering how I've never got Conrad >.>
GreEny K
Profile Joined February 2008
Germany7312 Posts
July 20 2010 13:25 GMT
#56
On July 20 2010 16:44 butchji wrote:
Show nested quote +
On July 20 2010 16:25 Blixy wrote:
Amazing read, thanks for posting!
I really love your write ups, they always give me lots to think about when beta is down.


How did you read all this in six minutes?


There's reading and then there is speed readong... Then there is skimming
Why would you ever choose failure, when success is an option.
Liquid`Nazgul
Profile Blog Joined September 2002
22427 Posts
July 20 2010 13:39 GMT
#57
read 1-3 so far posting to say it's amazing, will read the rest later
Administrator
Lysis
Profile Joined October 2009
United States147 Posts
July 20 2010 13:47 GMT
#58
I don't have the time to read it all but the Terran story was just amazing. A little lore thing that was off is that the Siege Tank in SC2 is a Crucio siege tank that uses a Crucio cannon, not an Arclite cannon like the old Siege Tank. Other than that it was really good.
SC2: Tavyr#340 -- Razer Mamba user -- Don't trust anyone who says Terran is imba.
EyMiller245
Profile Joined April 2010
United States45 Posts
July 20 2010 14:06 GMT
#59
Lol made my day
mOnion
Profile Blog Joined August 2009
United States5657 Posts
July 20 2010 14:12 GMT
#60
ho
ly
shit

daniel I fucking love you
☆★☆ 7486!!! Join the Ban mOnion Anti-Trolling Initiative! - Caller | "on a scale of machine to 10, how bad is that Zerg?" - LZgamer | you are the new tl.net bonjwa monion, congrats - Rekrul | "Cheeseburgers dynamite lilacs" - Chill
Garm
Profile Joined June 2010
Norway222 Posts
July 20 2010 14:13 GMT
#61
Holy fuckballs! This is one of the best things I've read on this site!

Kudos to you man, you rock
I didn't choose the Terran life. The Terran life chose me. Flash fan 2008 - eternity. FRB 2013! http://www.teamliquid.net/forum/viewmessage.php?topic_id=321242
DrBoo
Profile Joined April 2010
Canada1177 Posts
July 20 2010 14:22 GMT
#62
That was fantastic I loved reading it.

Thank you very much for the wonderful effort you put into this.
"DrBoo is an elaborate troll" -Pufftrees
jabberwokie
Profile Joined September 2009
Canada142 Posts
July 20 2010 14:26 GMT
#63
Some great reads and well picked art.
Kudos madprops /bow etc
Great work!

ggrrg
Profile Blog Joined September 2009
Bulgaria2716 Posts
July 20 2010 14:27 GMT
#64
Holy shit, that's a lot of text!
I just wish I didn't have to go out right now I could read it instead... The layout with all the pictures alone is already awesome. Titles make me want to read even more.
Ricjames
Profile Blog Joined April 2009
Czech Republic1047 Posts
July 20 2010 14:29 GMT
#65
Damn i would so read this if i only had time ..guess i will have to save it for later. Thank you man.
Brood War is the best RTS that has ever been created.
DashFlow
Profile Joined June 2010
United Kingdom176 Posts
July 20 2010 14:32 GMT
#66
Wow! How long did that take you :O
But anyway that has got to be one of the most epic things on Team Liquid ever.!

Well Done!!!
I Only Want You To Think Im Fantastic!
asdfTT123
Profile Blog Joined June 2009
United States989 Posts
July 20 2010 14:34 GMT
#67
Cool read, but this game definitely does not feel new to me with beta out for several months. Perhaps even a little stale...
n.Die_Jaedong <3
ReDTerraN
Profile Joined July 2009
Sweden88 Posts
July 20 2010 14:37 GMT
#68
it took me 2 hours to read all this, and I can say that this was worth reading!! :D
I support the emperor! not false GODS!
Skruttis
Profile Joined July 2010
Sweden187 Posts
July 20 2010 14:45 GMT
#69
Dude, this was beautiful! Truely amazing read! Very great job =)
NeCroPoTeNce
Profile Joined July 2009
United States513 Posts
July 20 2010 14:53 GMT
#70
Hot damn, thats a long read! Epic/awesome/everything else
zerg all the way! Lee Jaedong hwaiting
tredmasta
Profile Blog Joined June 2008
China152 Posts
July 20 2010 14:58 GMT
#71
Wow Dan, this is amazing!
<3 한승연 김태연!!!
Midj
Profile Joined March 2010
Canada253 Posts
July 20 2010 15:12 GMT
#72
I absolutely love the zerg poem.
I enjoy watching more than playing.
TelecoM
Profile Blog Joined January 2010
United States10668 Posts
July 20 2010 15:13 GMT
#73
holy mother of god this took me a long time to read but yea finally over, great read and saracen, you are amaziiiiiiiiing writer ! the zerg part is my fav =p
AKA: TelecoM[WHITE] Protoss fighting
AncienTs
Profile Joined March 2010
Japan227 Posts
July 20 2010 15:28 GMT
#74
"and the temple was nowhere to be found"

yes i was quite upset with that too =/
Starcraft Disclaimer Language: There is no imbalance, nothing is OP.
Tresh
Profile Joined March 2010
Argentina68 Posts
July 20 2010 15:35 GMT
#75
Very nice indeed! Loved the Terran story, although i did dislike the zerg poem (not that the poem was bad, though).

Bit of nerd chills.
Huh?
Crunchums
Profile Blog Joined December 2008
United States11143 Posts
July 20 2010 15:42 GMT
#76
Oh man, when I read the zerg part it made me so sad ;_;
brood war for life, brood war forever
Folca
Profile Blog Joined October 2006
2235 Posts
July 20 2010 15:51 GMT
#77
Teamliquid has been improving in such ways with amazing articles and great discussions like these. Complete respect to the OP and looking forward to so many more of these. Definitely something to read about.
Dea : one time when he was playing vs the comps he asked me "how do I make that flying unit that makes the other stuff invisible" and I reply "ur playing terran zomg"
Liquid`Sheth
Profile Blog Joined March 2010
United States2095 Posts
July 20 2010 16:00 GMT
#78
Nice read Saracen. Loved the 1984 tie ins! A-B A-B LOL!
Team LiquidUnderneath it all they were really quite nice. They just got screwed up. Mostly by stuff that wasn't entirely their fault.
Chewie
Profile Joined May 2010
Denmark708 Posts
July 20 2010 16:02 GMT
#79
State of the game and the company behind! Well done!
palanq
Profile Blog Joined December 2004
United States761 Posts
July 20 2010 16:03 GMT
#80
how the hell do you even do this, I can't even fathom... holy smokes. I am duly impressed, good sir.
time flies like an arrow; fruit flies like a banana
Trozz
Profile Blog Joined November 2008
Canada3454 Posts
Last Edited: 2010-07-20 16:03:53
July 20 2010 16:03 GMT
#81
Wow, this post is sick.
This is one hell of a read.
Good work Saracen.
A build is not a guess, an estimation or a hunch, a feeling, or a foolish intuition. A build is a dependable, unwavering, unarguably accurate, portrayer of your ambition.
d_so
Profile Blog Joined December 2007
Korea (South)3262 Posts
July 20 2010 16:04 GMT
#82
TL writers need to get paid for what they do
manner
sas01
Profile Joined February 2010
Canada303 Posts
Last Edited: 2010-07-20 16:53:26
July 20 2010 16:11 GMT
#83
NICE READ!!!
I loved the zerg poem! So true... so true..
But i know the zerg swarm will rise to greatness again... just a matter of time!!!
Last Romantic
Profile Blog Joined June 2006
United States20661 Posts
July 20 2010 16:19 GMT
#84
Nice article. Poor zerg
ㅋㄲㅈㅁ
Lexpar
Profile Blog Joined March 2009
1813 Posts
July 20 2010 16:20 GMT
#85
Very cute. The first three texts were particularly good, especially the zerg poem. Keep up the good work man, I enjoyed it loads
CuttyFlam
Profile Joined April 2010
Belgium523 Posts
July 20 2010 16:30 GMT
#86
Man... saracen... ur just AMAZING!!

lots of respect for your writing skill and motivation dude!!
Leave it to ................... Luck!!
CuttyFlam
Profile Joined April 2010
Belgium523 Posts
July 20 2010 16:32 GMT
#87
On July 20 2010 20:52 Navane wrote:
We need a pdf release for this. I want to read this printed out.


Yeah i really would love a pdf too, i want this in paper form to read in my lunch break! ^^
Leave it to ................... Luck!!
Saracen
Profile Blog Joined December 2007
United States5139 Posts
July 20 2010 16:34 GMT
#88
omg riptide it wasn't done yet lol.

Anyways, thanks a ton to riptide and the entire writing staff, and keit, of course, for helping me out. It took a ton of effort, but it finally got published lol.
LuigiNMario
Profile Joined April 2010
United States456 Posts
July 20 2010 16:35 GMT
#89
Oh goodness, this is an amazing read.
When there's Flash there's a way.
ghrur
Profile Blog Joined May 2009
United States3786 Posts
July 20 2010 16:43 GMT
#90
Wow, what a great article! Man, that was soooooooo worth the read. ^_^ Loved all the stories and references.
darkness overpowering
Geisterkarle
Profile Blog Joined September 2008
Germany3257 Posts
July 20 2010 16:46 GMT
#91
You guys are crazy!
And I'm happy to read something from you
There can only be one Geisterkarle
Dance.jhu
Profile Blog Joined May 2010
United States292 Posts
July 20 2010 16:48 GMT
#92
Good read!
It is what it is...
Chesner
Profile Blog Joined March 2010
Iceland817 Posts
July 20 2010 16:49 GMT
#93
... and this is why I love TL.

Just so amazing content all the time :O Good job Saracen and those involved, the Zerg poem was touching!
PENGUINS
Chewie
Profile Joined May 2010
Denmark708 Posts
July 20 2010 16:55 GMT
#94
Submit.
FiWiFaKi
Profile Blog Joined February 2009
Canada9858 Posts
July 20 2010 17:08 GMT
#95
I am in awe. This is simply amazing, so much insightful... Everything. I have never read anything like this, such a long long article and quality all the way through! Amazing amazing work, I totally agree the writers should get paid.
In life, the journey is more satisfying than the destination. || .::Entrepreneurship::. Living a few years of your life like most people won't, so that you can spend the rest of your life like most people can't || Mechanical Engineering & Economics Major
LuigiNMario
Profile Joined April 2010
United States456 Posts
July 20 2010 17:11 GMT
#96
On July 21 2010 01:19 Last Romantic wrote:
Nice article. Poor zerg


Yea
When there's Flash there's a way.
imPERSONater
Profile Blog Joined April 2010
United States1324 Posts
July 20 2010 17:11 GMT
#97
Jesus Christ that was epic! I am sure I can speak for all when I say we appreciate the effort put into this although I must imagine it is a labor of love for you if you are willing to sacrifice this much time to put together something so polished. The zerg poem was simply amazing! Well done sir.... well done.
Fan of: IdrA, Sen, Stephano, Snute, Axlav, Hero
hEndO
Profile Joined June 2010
United States124 Posts
July 20 2010 17:16 GMT
#98
great read. poem was really well done. thanks!
Im-JaY
Profile Blog Joined March 2008
Canada69 Posts
July 20 2010 17:30 GMT
#99
Simply stunning.
Deleted User 31060
Profile Blog Joined September 2007
3788 Posts
July 20 2010 17:44 GMT
#100
Geez, amazing writeup
Peaked at C- on ICCUP and proud of it! @Sunyveil
Alou
Profile Blog Joined March 2010
United States3748 Posts
July 20 2010 17:49 GMT
#101
Great read. Absolutely loved the Rise of the Phoenix and The Little Pony story hahah. Great job.
Life is Good.
rockon1215
Profile Joined May 2009
United States612 Posts
July 20 2010 18:04 GMT
#102
Holy Fuck.

Nice Job
Flash v Jaedong The finals that is ALWAYS meant to be
Al Bundy
Profile Joined April 2010
7257 Posts
July 20 2010 18:36 GMT
#103
Wow. Now THIS is an impressive article. Thank you
o choro é livre
darklordjac
Profile Joined July 2010
Canada2231 Posts
July 20 2010 18:38 GMT
#104
Very nice, awesome read!
s[O]rry
Profile Blog Joined November 2009
Canada398 Posts
July 20 2010 18:52 GMT
#105
Wow. That zerg poem was actually incredible! One of the best reads I have had on TL in a while. Thanks for that!
Sunshine.
drooL
Profile Blog Joined May 2010
United Kingdom2108 Posts
July 20 2010 18:58 GMT
#106
very cool stuff
@nowSimon
RamenAmen23
Profile Joined July 2010
United States11 Posts
July 20 2010 19:02 GMT
#107
1984 reference was great. Then again, so was everything else. Great job on this
No, I don't need more pylons!
squaremanhole
Profile Blog Joined July 2010
United States82 Posts
July 20 2010 19:08 GMT
#108
It's a good thing that I've already read those books (except Gulliver's Travels).
Lonelyness is just like a curable illness,I cure it with fapping. - PlosionCornu
im a roc
Profile Blog Joined April 2010
United States745 Posts
July 20 2010 19:10 GMT
#109
Certainly an article worthy of being the first SC2 centered Final Edit. Great work, as is typical, Saracen.
Beware The Proxy Pool Rush
BeaSteR
Profile Joined May 2009
Sweden328 Posts
July 20 2010 19:12 GMT
#110
Frikkin' awesome dude!
Greed is good
Satallgeese
Profile Blog Joined April 2010
United States239 Posts
July 20 2010 19:43 GMT
#111
Ugh, you're calling this Brave New World, but you're referencing 1984 in Chapter Five. Just kind of frustrating me a bit, xD!

Regardless, great read! Thanks for the fantastic images you guys create!
A good player practices until he gets it right. A great player practices until he can't get it wrong.
serenidite
Profile Blog Joined July 2010
Korea (South)505 Posts
July 20 2010 19:48 GMT
#112
oh my god that zerg poem is amazing
<3
" Never take life seriously. Nobody gets out alive anyway."
Frozenzen
Profile Joined May 2010
Sweden97 Posts
July 20 2010 20:30 GMT
#113
On July 21 2010 04:43 Satallgeese wrote:
Ugh, you're calling this Brave New World, but you're referencing 1984 in Chapter Five. Just kind of frustrating me a bit, xD!

Regardless, great read! Thanks for the fantastic images you guys create!


Hard to make an analogy to brave new world with b.net 2.0.

1984 on the other hand works excellent! Great read.
Parnage
Profile Blog Joined February 2010
United States7414 Posts
July 20 2010 20:32 GMT
#114
To be honest, I didn't much care for the 1984 bit though I understand that you probly put it in as a warning of what could happen should you take the empty feeling of b.net2.0 and never fixed it. Even so it's still a little extreme.

I loved everything else however! Thank you very much for the awesome article. You are clearly quite skilled at this, keep it up!
-orb- Fan. Live the Nal_rA dream. || Yordles are cool.
ChrisTheCerebrate
Profile Joined March 2010
1 Post
July 20 2010 20:38 GMT
#115
Great read and I love walls of text. They give me stuff to do. Eagerly f5ing for the next article :D
We are the Swarm, but we are becoming much, much more.
Misanthrope
Profile Blog Joined May 2010
United States924 Posts
July 20 2010 21:00 GMT
#116
This was really quite awesome. Great job on the Zerg, it truly expresses the loathing we all have for this new crippled incarnation. May the expansions let the rise of Zerg continue!
Resolve to perform what you ought. Perform without fail what you resolve. - Benjamin Franklin
Singularity
Profile Joined February 2010
Sweden142 Posts
July 20 2010 21:04 GMT
#117
I totally came when I read the Zerg poem.. I cant describe in words how awesome this write-up is! An astounding applaud to all of those who contributed to this wonderfull post!
chip789
Profile Joined June 2010
Canada199 Posts
July 20 2010 21:14 GMT
#118
loved the first story about the terran...just awesome.
Dude....I love Starcraft.
CeveRR
Profile Joined July 2009
Sweden16 Posts
July 20 2010 21:29 GMT
#119
wall of text crits you f.....

User was warned for this post
thehitman
Profile Blog Joined July 2010
1105 Posts
July 20 2010 22:25 GMT
#120
really amazing read, very interesting, funny and smart. Congratulations on the writing, really amazing stuff.
Man.Magic
Profile Blog Joined January 2010
United States178 Posts
July 21 2010 00:13 GMT
#121
I demand more.
¯\_(ツ)_/¯ ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
MaxField
Profile Blog Joined May 2010
United States2386 Posts
July 21 2010 00:15 GMT
#122
Took a while to read but was well worth it

When i started there was 7 comments, and now i am on like page 8. haha truly a great job!!
"Zerg, so bad it loses to hydras" IdrA.
Edso
Profile Joined June 2010
Canada112 Posts
July 21 2010 00:53 GMT
#123
The Zerg poem was clever lol.
tdhz77
Profile Blog Joined July 2010
United States16 Posts
July 21 2010 01:36 GMT
#124
Brilliant? No, "We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all men are created equal, that they are endowed by their Creator with certain unalienable Rights, that among these are Life, Liberty and the pursuit of Happiness," is brilliant. This post is entertaining and the author should be commended.
Since 01'
TuElite
Profile Blog Joined March 2010
Canada2123 Posts
July 21 2010 03:04 GMT
#125
Amazing. You're a quite talented writer OP. Please keep the awesomeness coming !
Always Smile - Jung Nicole - Follow Nicole on Twitter @_911007 and me @TuElite
DuncanIdaho
Profile Blog Joined April 2010
United States465 Posts
Last Edited: 2010-07-21 03:31:30
July 21 2010 03:29 GMT
#126
Good job! However, I am not sad about the new zerg, I love zerg, both the old and the new...

Perhaps olords lost their sight, perhaps they replaced OP'd defilers with Nerf'd infestors, perhaps our zerglings are also less OP, perhaps our lurkers are gone... (Temporarily? Rumors abound there is content for them hiding amongst the files...) And all we got for it all were roaches and banelings...

But it doesn't matter! We Zerg will conquer all, with just drones if we must!



In any case, I did like the poem, very clever, even though I don't share in your cynicism. :p And great job on the rest of the post as well
The spice must flow... Grammar lesson: "than" is used for quantity comparisons, "then" is used for chronological statements. The next forum user who says, "I'd do such and such, THAN I'd do such and such else," is gonna make me cry...
BAdGer_
Profile Joined January 2010
United States80 Posts
July 21 2010 07:03 GMT
#127
Great writeup!
one of the truly epic TLFE's that will be read long down the line...
there was one thing that was missing in my mind though as i read the piece about the terrans
Terran is the race of big dicked Vikings who rampage across the galaxies in huge battleships, rip up the ground with artillery spawned from the forges of hell, and send waves of valiant warriors to fight the freaks of science.

or maybe that only applied to SCBW Terrans?
either way your writeup was so eloquent, the zerg piece especially, so sad the zergs :'[
The End Is Coming--when SCBW dies WWIII will break out--you heard it here first
fevax
Profile Joined February 2010
Turkey143 Posts
July 21 2010 08:04 GMT
#128
this is pure genious, TL never ceases to amaze with it's content.
OneOther
Profile Blog Joined August 2004
United States10774 Posts
July 21 2010 08:27 GMT
#129
dan this is some great stuff. i will read chapters 4-6 later.
Piski
Profile Blog Joined April 2010
Finland3461 Posts
July 21 2010 14:50 GMT
#130
I love your write-ups!
LuigiNMario
Profile Joined April 2010
United States456 Posts
July 21 2010 16:19 GMT
#131
I loved the terran story most for the format and my biasness
When there's Flash there's a way.
FreezingAssassin
Profile Blog Joined March 2010
United States455 Posts
July 21 2010 18:43 GMT
#132
Long writeup but well worth the time. Such a good one too.
"I love when stupid stuff happens, it makes me look smart" - IdrA
sacrificetheory
Profile Joined September 2004
United States98 Posts
July 21 2010 19:33 GMT
#133
Amazing. Saracen is a great writer..... if not a prophet of SC2.
NeSS1
Profile Joined April 2010
United States101 Posts
July 21 2010 22:54 GMT
#134
Phenomenal allegories. You're a great writer.
pikaaarrr :3
Profile Blog Joined January 2010
United States593 Posts
July 22 2010 04:40 GMT
#135
I'm reading 1984 right now, and that part of the story made me really happy. It's incredibly well done.

Thanks Saracen!
SoJu.WeRRa
Profile Joined June 2010
Korea (South)820 Posts
July 22 2010 15:32 GMT
#136
wow big article ~!~ nice amazing !!
나를 찢어갈겨이씨발놈아왜나를미치게만들어니가뭘아는데?
TSM
Profile Blog Joined June 2010
Great Britain584 Posts
July 22 2010 16:58 GMT
#137
wow the maps thngs were epic 0_0
The person to smile when everything goes wrong has found someone to blame it on - arthur bloch **** tl:dr *user was banned for this post*
Guilty
Profile Blog Joined September 2008
Canada812 Posts
July 22 2010 19:29 GMT
#138
Great article and a wonderful read. Keep up the great work
"How hard could it be?" -J. Clarkson
MutaDoom
Profile Blog Joined January 2009
Canada1163 Posts
July 22 2010 20:23 GMT
#139
I almost shed a tear when I read Zerg, The Bastard Child. This whole thing was amazing, A+++
Tiptup
Profile Joined June 2007
United States133 Posts
July 22 2010 23:17 GMT
#140
Very entertaining read. "Bastard Child" and "B.Net 1.984" were easily the best.

The one I didn't find entertaining was "Gulliver's Travels." Maybe I missed something. I wasn't noticing any in-jokes or subtle commentary. Perhaps I should have read it more closely.
So certain are you.
Zeus13i
Profile Joined July 2010
Australia1 Post
July 24 2010 07:24 GMT
#141
tldr

User was banned for this post.
You require additional APM.
saluber
Profile Blog Joined July 2010
United States22 Posts
July 31 2010 18:02 GMT
#142
Haha this is great. I like the Starcraft poem
En Taro Adun :)
Taekwon
Profile Joined May 2010
United States8155 Posts
August 01 2010 16:54 GMT
#143
LOL - thought this was going to take after the book
▲ ▲ ▲
FlashIsHigh
Profile Blog Joined December 2009
United States474 Posts
August 02 2010 17:33 GMT
#144
Great write ups
KT Flash// WhiteRa/Scarlett/Naniwa/MC/Huk/Nony
gorkhus98
Profile Joined April 2010
France35 Posts
September 09 2010 07:11 GMT
#145
Poor zerg :'( I feel the pain every day ... But I must say you forgot one sad tale about "us": the two-step timings of our static defenses against the one-step-and-wait-a-hell-a-time-after-pool pseudo-mobile defenses
I still up to this day despite time spent on beta have this compulsory "quick a lolpool is coming! must... put creep colony so it's rdy to morph in not too much time once pool is... oh, wait... right."
aging when keeping a passionate gaming mind is rough
Normal
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