Sometimes it feels like nothing in this world can ever be good enough for me. Being a simple working class man, being a lawyer, being a doctor...they all seem like they aren't good enough for me. Like I can be someone so much bigger, so much greater, I want to be the best.
I'm 19, and in that phase in life where I have to decide what I want to do with myself. What career do I take? Should I work with computers? Maybe get a job with some computer company and sit a 4x4 cubicle on the 14th floor of some building in front of a monitor all day?
Maybe I can become a dentist or doctor. It's a prestigious job. Makes good money. In the former case, I will be standing in small rooms all day, leaned over some guy and reaching into his mouth with drill doing a root canal or filling a cavity. In the latter case I could be sitting in some office looking at x-rays, or doing an EGD, or performing a coronary artery bypass surgery in some hospital.
Could become a researcher. Sit in a lab all day making solutions, running columns, doing some spectroscopy and assays. Or become a teacher and teach the same material year after year to kids until I puke.
I hate conformity. I think its a phobia, or there is something psychologically amiss with me, but I despise it. Let me explicitly tell you what I mean by this. I hate being generalized, or categorized, or doing the same thing that other people do. Example: I hated saying the national anthem every morning in high school. I would just stand there with my hand over my heart, but no words came out. Like I was being institutionalized or something. I love America, but I hate conformity. Maybe thats why I like dystopian books so much. I don't like following the styles everyone else does; I just like doing my own thing and being unique. One of a kind, someone who shines, someone different.
When I think about the world, and all the possibilities it has, it just doesn't seem enough. I want to do something that nobody has ever done in this world. I want to cure cancer, write a novel series that belittles Harry Potter by 100 fold, be the biggest star this world has seen. I want to shine so brightly that the progress of history itself could not and would not be possible without my influence.
In plain terms, I am ambitious. So much so that I feel like nothing this world can offer me is good enough. Maybe I'm naive, but I feel so confident. It's ironic that I am writing this on some random starcraft forum of all places. I guess in the end though, having pure ambition is worthless unless you can turn it into something real. After all, you can't win a game with 20,000 minerals when all you have are supply depots.
On April 29 2009 16:08 nataziel wrote: If you don't want to conform, don't. Drop out, go travelling, live on the streets. It's up to you. You don't HAVE to do anything.
Traveling to where and to do what? Just go to some random places, walk here and there, see some mountains or cows or snow or whatever? And then what? I don't want to live on the streets either.
Travel everywhere! Do everything! You said you're ambitious, just go. YES! Go to random places walk here and there see everything. I doubt you could see everything in one lifetime. There is no then what. You don't want to live on the streets but you don't want to conform? Kinda counter intuitive really.
Point is, if you want to do something do it. If you find out you can't do it, try doing something else. How will you ever know if something isn't good enough for you if you never do it?
If you want to cure cancer, study fucking hard! If you want to write good books, start writing! Just stop whinging about it and do it.
On April 29 2009 16:08 nataziel wrote: If you don't want to conform, don't. Drop out, go travelling, live on the streets. It's up to you. You don't HAVE to do anything.
actually thats how i ended up in the US, still cant forgive myself leaving uni after 3 years
OP, you can envision things being great, in the end it still gets repetitive and boring unless you find something to live for - a job( occupation) that you love and can always improve at or a person( family) you wish to live for. Everything else turns into routine and loses its brightness, even though it might seem attractive at first
you can be a rebel for only so long - you bound to settle down some time, just because you have to survive or "move on" in life( doesnt matter if you accept it or not, unless you okay with being a bum) And when you are this much older it gets tough to start over, Ive done it many times
so educate yourself while you can and try to absorb as much as possible. Without that you wont get closer to anything
As for being unique, we all are, that is the easy part. It's not about hating conformity and it's not about ambition. It is about passion, without it, goals and dreams have no legs. Find passion, the rest falls in place.
Typical teenage boy angst. Go listen to Linkin Park for a week or so and you'll remember what you've done with your life and that in the end it doesn't even matter.
I felt (feel) exactly the same, but this "conformity" really isn't what you think. I agree that this world feels small, but without a job or income, how will you feed yourself as you're coming up with your great novel? How will you cure cancer without a proper education and studying what everyone has been already been doing? (Unless you're a medical genius, which I doubt you are).
It's the fact that you have the urge, the ambition but no goal. You have the passion, but no where to put it. I don't know how old you are, how much of this world you've seen or what you have experienced, but trust me when I say that this world DOES have a lot to offer; you just need to figure out what it is you want to take from it. You said it yourself "I guess in the end though, having pure ambition is worthless unless you can turn it into something real. After all, you can't win a game with 20,000 minerals when all you have are supply depots."
I hope you put your ambitions towards something that makes you content. But to be someone great, you're gonna have to put in the grunt work.
Life is a lot like pokemon. You've gotta catch'm all!
Life's a little different though instead of pokemon that fight each other, you have girls. Instead of catching them all, you just gotta bang'm all. Instead of collecting badges, take their underwear.
After you've caught them all your allowed to be bored of this world, and claim it's not big enough for you. Until then.. Keep the dream alive! + Show Spoiler +
On April 29 2009 16:04 GrayArea wrote: When I think about the world, and all the possibilities it has, it just doesn't seem enough. I want to do something that nobody has ever done in this world. I want to cure cancer, write a novel series that belittles Harry Potter by 100 fold, be the biggest star this world has seen. I want to shine so brightly that the progress of history itself could not and would not be possible without my influence.
Takes plain work boyo.
When you figure out what to do (and you will, you're still young) then you have something to direct all your ambition towards.
More like the world is too big for you. You may have all these dreams and ambitions, but there's already someone out there more talented, capable and hard-working than you in a particular area.
The world doesn't care for people "who know they can be the best", only those who prove they are the best. From your last paragraph I suppose you do realise this, but it's just that simple really.
Being ambitious isn't a bad thing though, even if you're doomed to a life of mediocrity.
On April 29 2009 16:04 GrayArea wrote: Sometimes it feels like nothing in this world can ever be good enough for me. Being a simple working class man, being a lawyer, being a doctor...they all seem like they aren't good enough for me. Like I can be someone so much bigger, so much greater, I want to be the best.
I just like doing my own thing and being unique. One of a kind, someone who shines, someone different.
When I think about the world, and all the possibilities it has, it just doesn't seem enough. I want to do something that nobody has ever done in this world. I want to cure cancer, write a novel series that belittles Harry Potter by 100 fold, be the biggest star this world has seen. I want to shine so brightly that the progress of history itself could not and would not be possible without my influence.
Seems to me you want to be special, but you do not want to put in the hard work like education, working 10 hours a day at least, etc. Keep on dreaming then little man, you have yet to learn the ways of the world.
Every person that has ever accomplished anything significant (at least 99.9% of them, there are always flukes ofc.) was not at all against any form of conformism. Instead they 'played by the rules', but worked so hard that they eventually rose above the masses.
If you keep fighting against everything, if you refuse to work for your school, your job, if you expect to just be important one day, ... then little man, you are in for a BIG surprise.
What a pathetic thread. I want to be admired but I am too lazy to do anything. Waeh waeh the world is not big enough.
What are your accomplishments so far expect being 19 and being ambitious? Here is an idea: Try to accomplish anything before you complain everything is too trivial.
Completely serious suggestion though: Win a boxing match. That should reset your perspective on a lot of things.
I recomment volunteering working with the mentally handicapped. If you think your cut out for it. Try to find something that isn't about you. It can be a releave to let go of your ego and set aside your preconceptions. Doing something for people who do not try exploit your ambition could make it feel more authentic.
Maybe you want to proof yourself first to affirm yourself and get recognision from others if that is one of your desires. After accomplishing that your needs might grow into a different direction or you might like to continue on the same path. Be aware of what others expect of you and what your attitude is towards those opinions. It is all part of getting to know yourself.
There are academic avenues of development but also alternatives. You are not stuck on one path but also don't have unlimmited time. Acedemic preasure can help you develop fortitude. What do you want to accomplish with your degree. Make money. Get perstige, status relating to who. Help people. change the shape of thing to come. Improve society as a whole or help individuals personally.
I hate conforming too. Unless you are rich there is really nothing you can do but work and/or go to school if you don't wanna conform (as ironic as that sounds).
You need to stop trying to figure out what you want to be, and start learning who you are. Sounds to me like you're so afraid of being something that's "not good enough" that you've lost touch of what matters... Being happy.
In my honest opinion, you need to take a year or two to live in this world that's just not big enough for you, get a job doing some real work, and grow up in the process. Sometimes it takes lowering yourself to something menial to make sense of your life.
I felt like I was too good for certain things once... Then I got a job framing houses with a non-english speaking crew, and busted my ass for about two years. Want to know the crazy thing? I was more at peace with myself... more happy... during those two years than I ever had been before. I learned more about myself, about life, and about... well, speaking Spanish, than I ever had before. It gave my life new direction.
Now I'm getting ready to enter law school, and I have every intention of changing the world (even if it just means helping one person) when I get out.
Stop being a bitch and do something hard for once. I think that after you put yourself through something that's "not good enough" you'll come out the other side with a new outlook on life in general.
This thread reeks of the whole "I could beat all the progamers if I just played as much as them" narcissistic mentality. Your saying becoming a lawyer, dentist or doctor is beneath you and that you wouldnt be satisfied? Try getting into one of those degrees at least before spouting that crap.
The inspirational people who do amazing things with their lives are generally at the top of very competative fields. Youve given us no indication that you can even compete at a basic level in those fields so I think you should start there.
In the end, anyone can turn around and say that they wanna change the world. But it takes a hell of a lot hard work to actually do so. I doesnt sound like your willing to put any hard work in however.
Very interesting thread, I sometimes have similar feelings. It's not that I look down onto certain occupations, it's more that I fear having chosen the wrong one and that I am wasting my life on it.
My life goal is world domination. Why is that dream always locked away in the realm of fictitious evil characters? I have the vision but unfortunately not the work ethic to pull it off.
You are not a beautiful and unique snowflake. You are the same decaying organic matter as everyone else, and we are all part of the same compost pile.
Seriously, once your older, prepare to have your ego crushed, I already know I'm nothing special, and that is why I continue to work harder than anyone around me to accomplish my own goals. Feeling it is absolutely garbage, absolutely fucking shit in this world. You will get mocked a fool, and your nothing unless you actually do something.
But here's another quote from a great writer: "Never mistake motion for action."
I saw that pre-edit GrayArea haha. I got similar responses in the couple of blogs I wrote. I think we share rather similar styles of thought. No need to share more than the message, and keeping the rest to yourself.
It would be quite satisfying to blast on you like so many others in this thread, but I've gone through a similar phase in my own life (albiet with far less arrogance), so I'll cut the crap.
Your OP is filled with blatant contradiction. On one hand, you spout of your ambition and desire for non-conformity - which is perfectly fine in itself. However, the way you look at the world seems to be through a highly superficial lens, defined not by what it actually means to be say a doctor or a teacher, but by the general perception of what a doctor or a teacher does. You can't say that you hate conformity, and then rely on everyone else's perception of what "X" is to make up your mind for you. By doing so you're allowing yourself to be generalized / categorized. There's more to being a doctor than "looking at x-rays and performing surgery", and there's more to being a teacher than "teaching the same material year after year until you puke"; there's a human element involved.
The world seems to stress on us things that really aren't as important as they seem - like what your job is, how much money you make, etc. I believe life is about people, and interaction, and growth. You said that you see all the possibilities this world has to offer and it doesn't seem to be enough. It's easy to look at the world and scoff from afar, but it's much more difficult to be a participant and make yourself vulnerable to inadequacy.
Even if you hadn't mentioned that you're 19, I would still say I think your point of view is pretty much based on a lack of experience. When I was in a similar state of mind, I too thought I was invincible and so much smarter than everyone else and that after college life would be a piece of cake. It was only when I finally picked a career path (actuary), started studying and taking the practice exams while working full time did I realize how small and insignificant I actually was.
Once I put myself out there I realized that there were thousands of people out there just as smart as me fighting just as hard or harder for the same thing I wanted, and thousands more even smarter than I. It was a scary realization and a hard pill to swallow, but it was also exhilarating in a sick sort of way. It was a new battle to be fought, a new challenge to overcome. Did I really think that they were any better or smarter than I was? Maybe, maybe not. But it was up to me to either prove them right or prove them wrong. And that's what life is all about. As cheesy as it sounds, it's not about the destination but the journey. After all, you can watch a thousand reps and call everyone a newb, but your opinion doesn't mean shit until you actually sit down and play a game yourself.
On April 29 2009 16:04 GrayArea wrote: Sometimes it feels like nothing in this world can ever be good enough for me. Being a simple working class man, being a lawyer, being a doctor...they all seem like they aren't good enough for me. Like I can be someone so much bigger, so much greater, I want to be the best.
I'm 19, and in that phase in life where I have to decide what I want to do with myself...
When I think about the world, and all the possibilities it has, it just doesn't seem enough. I want to. do something that nobody has ever done in this world. I want to cure cancer, write a novel series that belittles Harry Potter by 100 fold, be the biggest star this world has seen. I want to shine so brightly that the progress of history itself could not and would not be possible without my influence.
This is just normal adolescence. During adolescence we develop the ability to think abstractly, think about our own thoughts (metacognition), and change the way we process information. Huge changes occur in how our brains work and one textbook characteristic of adolescence is fantasies of grandeur.
"Self-reflection becomes possible now because the person can look at him- or herself objectively from a witness perspective. Consequently introspection becomes a huge pastime for adolescents who spend hours assessing their self-images and imagining how they come across to others. This is called egocentric thought, partly because its focus is the self and partly because it puts the self in the center of the universe. Along with this tendency is that of personal myth (fantasies of grandeur and/or heroism) and imaginary audience."
--http://www.spiritsong.org/unit4-2.htm
This is good and normal.
As far as the non-conformism, that is pretty normal as well I think.
So...welcome to human development.
EDIT: But remember that fantasies get you nowhere. You CAN accomplish big things but it takes HARD WORK and lots of it. Work harder than anyone else around you and you will succeed. Don't get addicted to anything so you stay in reality and don't turn control of your life over to anything else. Be master of yourself and not a servant to the chemicals in your brain.
EDIT2: Regarding all the people who "bashed" you in this thread. Probably what happened is some of them felt the same way when they were younger but then after a little bit of adult living, came back to reality as is also normal. That is coming for you...just wait. But the trick is that after you realize you are a normal person and very unlikely to "cure cancer" or have some other great achievement, don't let that stop you. You can't cure cancer, but you CAN be a doctor if you work your butt off. You can't outsell Harry Potter but if you work harder than everyone else (that means less fun, less TV, less Starcraft even), you CAN publish a book someday...perhaps several. And those are still big accomplishments.
On April 30 2009 11:51 TeNken.1 wrote: It would be quite satisfying to blast on you like so many others in this thread, but I've gone through a similar phase in my own life (albiet with far less arrogance), so I'll cut the crap.
Your OP is filled with blatant contradiction. On one hand, you spout of your ambition and desire for non-conformity - which is perfectly fine in itself. However, the way you look at the world seems to be through a highly superficial lens, defined not by what it actually means to be say a doctor or a teacher, but by the general perception of what a doctor or a teacher does. You can't say that you hate conformity, and then rely on everyone else's perception of what "X" is to make up your mind for you. By doing so you're allowing yourself to be generalized / categorized. There's more to being a doctor than "looking at x-rays and performing surgery", and there's more to being a teacher than "teaching the same material year after year until you puke"; there's a human element involved.
The world seems to stress on us things that really aren't as important as they seem - like what your job is, how much money you make, etc. I believe life is about people, and interaction, and growth. You said that you see all the possibilities this world has to offer and it doesn't seem to be enough. It's easy to look at the world and scoff from afar, but it's much more difficult to be a participant and make yourself vulnerable to inadequacy.
Even if you hadn't mentioned that you're 19, I would still say I think your point of view is pretty much based on a lack of experience. When I was in a similar state of mind, I too thought I was invincible and so much smarter than everyone else and that after college life would be a piece of cake. It was only when I finally picked a career path (actuary), started studying and taking the practice exams while working full time did I realize how small and insignificant I actually was.
Once I put myself out there I realized that there were thousands of people out there just as smart as me fighting just as hard or harder for the same thing I wanted, and thousands more even smarter than I. It was a scary realization and a hard pill to swallow, but it was also exhilarating in a sick sort of way. It was a new battle to be fought, a new challenge to overcome. Did I really think that they were any better or smarter than I was? Maybe, maybe not. But it was up to me to either prove them right or prove them wrong. And that's what life is all about. As cheesy as it sounds, it's not about the destination but the journey. After all, you can watch a thousand reps and call everyone a newb, but your opinion doesn't mean shit until you actually sit down and play a game yourself.
wow, good post. I agree with all this.
I would also add that not doing something (like not saying the pledge of allegiance) for the sake being "non-conformist" is simply another way of letting other people control your actions. Because they did X, I must do "not X". You didn't choose "not X", it was chosen for you by the fact that everyone else did X. Thus you become someone whose actions are determined by other people. That is not being the Captain of your own Soul. That is just keeping your eye on some other ship and trying to do the opposite of what he does.
So make your choices (salute or not salute) before you allow yourself to ponder what everyone else is doing. What they are doing is irrelevant. THAT is true non-conformity...or true independence. The "fake" non conformism to always do "not X" where X is defined by someone else.
On April 30 2009 11:51 TeNken.1 wrote: It would be quite satisfying to blast on you like so many others in this thread, but I've gone through a similar phase in my own life (albiet with far less arrogance), so I'll cut the crap.
Your OP is filled with blatant contradiction. On one hand, you spout of your ambition and desire for non-conformity - which is perfectly fine in itself. However, the way you look at the world seems to be through a highly superficial lens, defined not by what it actually means to be say a doctor or a teacher, but by the general perception of what a doctor or a teacher does. You can't say that you hate conformity, and then rely on everyone else's perception of what "X" is to make up your mind for you. By doing so you're allowing yourself to be generalized / categorized. There's more to being a doctor than "looking at x-rays and performing surgery", and there's more to being a teacher than "teaching the same material year after year until you puke"; there's a human element involved.
The world seems to stress on us things that really aren't as important as they seem - like what your job is, how much money you make, etc. I believe life is about people, and interaction, and growth. You said that you see all the possibilities this world has to offer and it doesn't seem to be enough. It's easy to look at the world and scoff from afar, but it's much more difficult to be a participant and make yourself vulnerable to inadequacy.
Even if you hadn't mentioned that you're 19, I would still say I think your point of view is pretty much based on a lack of experience. When I was in a similar state of mind, I too thought I was invincible and so much smarter than everyone else and that after college life would be a piece of cake. It was only when I finally picked a career path (actuary), started studying and taking the practice exams while working full time did I realize how small and insignificant I actually was.
Once I put myself out there I realized that there were thousands of people out there just as smart as me fighting just as hard or harder for the same thing I wanted, and thousands more even smarter than I. It was a scary realization and a hard pill to swallow, but it was also exhilarating in a sick sort of way. It was a new battle to be fought, a new challenge to overcome. Did I really think that they were any better or smarter than I was? Maybe, maybe not. But it was up to me to either prove them right or prove them wrong. And that's what life is all about. As cheesy as it sounds, it's not about the destination but the journey. After all, you can watch a thousand reps and call everyone a newb, but your opinion doesn't mean shit until you actually sit down and play a game yourself.
On April 29 2009 16:04 GrayArea wrote: Sometimes it feels like nothing in this world can ever be good enough for me. Being a simple working class man, being a lawyer, being a doctor...they all seem like they aren't good enough for me. Like I can be someone so much bigger, so much greater, I want to be the best.
I'm 19, and in that phase in life where I have to decide what I want to do with myself...
When I think about the world, and all the possibilities it has, it just doesn't seem enough. I want to. do something that nobody has ever done in this world. I want to cure cancer, write a novel series that belittles Harry Potter by 100 fold, be the biggest star this world has seen. I want to shine so brightly that the progress of history itself could not and would not be possible without my influence.
This is just normal adolescence. During adolescence we develop the ability to think abstractly, think about our own thoughts (metacognition), and change the way we process information. Huge changes occur in how our brains work and one textbook characteristic of adolescence is fantasies of grandeur.
"Self-reflection becomes possible now because the person can look at him- or herself objectively from a witness perspective. Consequently introspection becomes a huge pastime for adolescents who spend hours assessing their self-images and imagining how they come across to others. This is called egocentric thought, partly because its focus is the self and partly because it puts the self in the center of the universe. Along with this tendency is that of personal myth (fantasies of grandeur and/or heroism) and imaginary audience."
--http://www.spiritsong.org/unit4-2.htm
This is good and normal.
As far as the non-conformism, that is pretty normal as well I think.
So...welcome to human development.
EDIT: But remember that fantasies get you nowhere. You CAN accomplish big things but it takes HARD WORK and lots of it. Work harder than anyone else around you and you will succeed. Don't get addicted to anything so you stay in reality and don't turn control of your life over to anything else. Be master of yourself and not a servant to the chemicals in your brain.
EDIT2: Regarding all the people who "bashed" you in this thread. Probably what happened is some of them felt the same way when they were younger but then after a little bit of adult living, came back to reality as is also normal. That is coming for you...just wait. But the trick is that after you realize you are a normal person and very unlikely to "cure cancer" or have some other great achievement, don't let that stop you. You can't cure cancer, but you CAN be a doctor if you work your butt off. You can't outsell Harry Potter but if you work harder than everyone else (that means less fun, less TV, less Starcraft even), you CAN publish a book someday...perhaps several. And those are still big accomplishments.
These are both really good comments, thanks guys. I actually really like being in this "stage" of my life or whatever because it gives me confidence that I can do anything if I set my mind to it. And to kind of extrapolate on the idea, its better to aim at the top so that even if you fall short by a little, you still will be pretty high up.
Ambition without talent is just annoying and cocky.
IF you think you're capable of so much, go and fucking do it. Don't just sit around telling people about it. Frankly if you're 19 and you weren't already on your way to being a doctor, you're probably not going to be one.
Everyone wants to be great. Then they hit 35 and go through a mid-life crisis realising they still haven't achieved all that they dreamed of. So I'll repeat myself. Stop wasting your time blowing up your ego, and start doing whatever it is you want to do.
On April 30 2009 16:35 Chef wrote: Ambition without talent is just annoying and cocky.
IF you think you're capable of so much, go and fucking do it. Don't just sit around telling people about it. Frankly if you're 19 and you weren't already on your way to being a doctor, you're probably not going to be one.
Everyone wants to be great. Then they hit 35 and go through a mid-life crisis realising they still haven't achieved all that they dreamed of. So I'll repeat myself. Stop wasting your time blowing up your ego, and start doing whatever it is you want to do.
You kind of missed the point by a long shot. In fact, I think the OP went totally over your head.
Also, don't be so pessimistic. 19 is still a young age to decide to become a doctor. After all, the average matriculation age for med school is ~23. There are also many, many people who become doctors when they are 30+ years old, after they start a family and everything (Non-traditional students).
[EDIT]: Kind of surreal seeing old posts like this written by me. Wow, I'm trying to remember what I was feeling when I wrote this, and it's like trying to remember what you felt like in a dream you had a week ago. Anyway, just wanted to update that I will be starting school for a medical career and I'm super excited. I guess there was something in this world that was good enough for me after all.
On June 24 2012 03:05 GrayArea wrote: [EDIT]: Kind of surreal seeing old posts like this written by me. Wow, I'm trying to remember what I was feeling when I wrote this, and it's like trying to remember what you felt like in a dream you had a week ago. Anyway, just wanted to update that I will be starting school for a medical career and I'm super excited. I guess there was something in this world that was good enough for me after all.
I often wish that the threads from my lurking days would be updated by those old souls. Today I get my wish.
I'm glad that you made a decision that didn't involve being a homeless man in Tibet or something.
On June 24 2012 03:05 GrayArea wrote: [EDIT]: Kind of surreal seeing old posts like this written by me. Wow, I'm trying to remember what I was feeling when I wrote this, and it's like trying to remember what you felt like in a dream you had a week ago. Anyway, just wanted to update that I will be starting school for a medical career and I'm super excited. I guess there was something in this world that was good enough for me after all.
Grats. If you don't mind, what kind of medical career exactly? Are you going to be a MD?
I think I'm feeling what you felt back then in 2009. There's some good advice in here.
You just graduated from college and are going for Med school at what should be 22 now. You have some self restraint to not lash out against the people who retorted in this thread that you're just not working hard and are just whining.
For me at least the feeling that I want to be great affects everything about me. It makes it so I don't want to play games for fear of being addicted, or seeing my friends for the same reasons. I don't read for pleasure any more because I think I should spend my time learning more important useful things. And yet I still procrastinate everyday on useful tasks. This has been going on for years. If it were as simple as saying "just work hard" then everyone would be making above 100k a year.
Have you accepted that you probably won't be one of the greats?
Congrats on going to med school OP! Glad to know you found your calling and something that you are passionate about that can help others. Now go be the best doctor you can be :D