EPT
So as an update to my Starcraft escapades, I Almost won a game. You know that place between getting beat and with a little better scouting I could have won? Well I didn't really almost won. I got rever dropped and couldn't recover.
So basically I divide my gaming time now between getting beat on ICCup and in turn taking my frustration out on the ten year olds on US-West. Thats right ImaPwnUChildren. Of course every party can come to an unfortunate end: DT's anyone? That's right I sat around on BGH and waited to get dark Templar Rushed. Not even a rush, more like just getting beaten a really long time into a game. The worst part? Every other player was running 37 APM to my 112. You know what that means? They would of had to just be using their mice. No keyboard macro. Fucking ridiculous. For those of you Pure Pwange fans out there, remember the words of the Masterer . "Even when one is Pro, one can still be a No0b." Words to take to heart.
Speaking of Ninjas, Lemme talk real quick about one stealthy game that I got some problems with. I've been Rockin' the Metal Gear Solid games since I was ten (what a fucked up time to play that game, huh?) and i will admit that I was a one time entranced by the plot. Sure Kojima video games are used to brainwash kids into being violent (as I play one of the most violent games for PSX.) I even stayed true in MGS2 in the Big Shell when Cambell starts flipping nuts about computer viruses and how he owes Raidin money (worst character in the world.) But this time you have gone too far.
This is your SPOILER alert.
The whole thing with Ocelot and Liquid Snake? You that whole conversation:
Ocelot: I'm missing an Arm!
Liquid: I'm missing a Body!
Both: What a perfect Match! <Queue Romantic Music>
And then quite later:
Liquid: HAHAHAHA! My mind was actually In my arm and now i control you!
Okay now that doesn't really make any sense, nor does it make sense that the Metal Gear he rides on keeps fucking bleeding, but I'm willing to role with that. Turns out that that whole possesed you with my arm thing? That was a trick. Check this shit out: Ocelot hypnotized Himself so that he could trick everyone. Now a normal person might ask themselves, "why not just pretend to be someone else?" That's not how Kojima does things. He goes big. So fuck plots, I'm off plots for now. No Lost or Donnie Darco or Chuck Palahniuk for me. I'm now only cool with "save the princess with sword or shoes with lots of ankle support (for jumping)
For those of you who still cling to your Plot Discontinuities, let me apply your story model to something that you know and love:
Mario needed to go beat up the big turtle to save the princess because he needed some play. But when he got to Bowser's castle he found out that Bowser was really his father but not actually his father because the father he knew was actually himself that went back in time to parent himself. But just before Mario grabs that Axe to drop The turtle king slash his father slash himself mario realizes that he is really bowser and all of those mushrooms he ate to get bigger were actually special...
Write me if you like me. Or wanna play SC. Or wanna throw down in Magic: The Gathering. Or if your lonely
-Clark
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