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i'd been meaning to make a substantive blog for a while, actually talking about mah feelings and just my thoughts and experience so far--just having some sort of log etc, but somehow i ended up just typing a hasty (turns out it's still pretty long and dumb though) rant blog.
probably nobody will be able to slog through it in its entirety and understand what i'm trying to sputter out, but at least i can get it off my chest.
it's 12:08 am as i begin typing this
i got a 40% on my first multivar calc midterm and a 68% on my first cs midterm
today i just bombed my second cs midterm
tomorrow/this morning at 8am is my second math midterm
.................................
put all my eggs in the cs basket but it turns out cs was hard as fuck anyway. for math it's much much much harder cuz the prof is a demon beast from hell russia, i'm bad at math, and haven't really studied (eggs in cs basket etc) so so i'm triply fucked there holy fuck
i'm having a really really really bad time with everything like wtf. if i had been 100% focused on working, i might potentially have been sort of okay, as when i do focus in discussion/section, stuff kinda makes sense. but i'm so behind on not knowing anything that it's built up to the point where nothing works and idk what to do.
next semester i'm taking it easy (like much more), just cs data structures, math linear algebra/diff eqs, a legal studies seminar, and the biz administration intro class
this is because i'm also interested potentially in business: great experience with econ in hs, i like what i've been hearing about the major, also i'm interested in finance potentially. i'm also interested maybe in law: i do like doing a lot of reading/research, argumentation/writing.
though tbh i know little about both fields so i'd like to get into them more. idk, law/business do seem really interesting and less daunting than the hard technicals where you have to figure out a way to solve all the problems versus having read up, having the knowledge in mind, and just regurgitating it or formulating your own approaches to case studies, etc etc on exams is so much less "scary"...so yeah, i was thinking about getting into those...BUT
BUT BUT
with a shit gpa after this semester, my chances for ANYTHING are extremely bleak. you have to apply to the business school within the university for the major, and it's very very competitive. in fact, the mere idea that i'm even EXPLORING business actually looks really bad, as if i'm lying to myself that i could do business and get in among the competition, because it's actually a joke if i think i'll make it with shit grades. i mean that's just appearances and it doesn't matter because i'm mostly taking it to explore the major/field, but yeah, it's pretty horrible nonetheless.
same applies to law i guess.
i was planning on switching out of EECS (CS focus) in the college of engineering and into the general college, so i could still continue in CS (which i do enjoy, i'm just shit at it) while exploring other fields--maybe i would double in CS and something else, maybe i would double/single major but without CS.
however, at this point, nothing is really going for me. i overloaded and it's too late to drop, and i can't pass/no pass my technicals. multivar calc is a prereq for the EECS major but not for CS in the other college, but i have to take it for a grade right now because i'm technically still in the college of engineering. to declare majors in the general college there is a GPA requirement, and to apply to the undergrad business school, you need really really really solid stats.
fuck i don't know what to do, it's like too late for me. tutoring can't make up for how ridiculously behind i am, esp with how it's group tutoring with tons of students who all need their own time etc. office hours are pointless for professor and for me because i don't even really have anything to ask, i don't even know what i don't know.
sucks cuz i'm just super stupid AND i didn't put in the work. i don't deserve any sympathy whatsoever, it's just me being dumb and not working hard enough, no other way to put it.
alright that's it for me, if you actually read through that i'm literally sorry because it was just a shitty rant and i'm sorry you had to put up with my pure unadulterated stupidity.
   
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i dont have any advice i also dont understand how uni works in america but good luck aeri!! seems like you definitely need some atm.
That being said..i do think it miiight not be as bad as you think (idk ;_; how schools work there) but so you still have finals right (here its like mid-term 10-20% and finals like 70-80% of the end grade) hmm so maybe theres still hope if you buckel down and go hardcore study mode.
Normally i like to start a semester by downloading the past exam papers for the last 3 years, and then looking at the course structure the lectures normally post up (well at least where i am they do) and then just write the relevent questions from the exam paper to a book where u can bring into the lecture and when the prof gets up to that part you just put ur hand up and ask (you'll probably have to reword it so its not just a straight application of an exam question) but thats been working well for me. It gets you really well prepared for exams too (and i hhaaatteee exams omg T_T the most horrible)
Also while i havnt really done this myself but i asked you too! did u make friends? pick like the smartest/nicest one and ask them to help u go through past exam questions or concepts/questions u didnt get from the lecture. I personally hate trying to understand lecture notes sometimes they seem to be worded just to confuse you and getting someone who can explain it to you in layman terms helps sooo much. Especially cause u can ask follow up questions, i know you think ur really really behind but sometimes just gotta keep on trucking through ;_;
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It sounds like you're at UC Berkeley*, where I'm a fourth-year business major. I've known people who underwent a brutal first semester, and I'd urge you to meet with your academic adviser if you haven't already. They will help you examine your options, and it helps to put things into perspective: it's not unusual to have failing midterm grades, especially if you're taking Math 53 with Givental (Russian from hell indeed) and one of the CS 61Xs.
I'd also wish you luck with UGBA 10 and the Haas program, but the class hinges on remembering meaningless factoids to the exclusion of any actual work, and the admissions process takes your GPA (too) heavily into account. If you ever want to chat, send me a PM. Always fun to meet up with fellow TLers/Cal students.
*If you're not actually at UC Berkeley I'm really sorry to jump to the conclusion, and I wish you luck nonetheless :D
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Russian Federation3631 Posts
get some sleep (seriously, at least get 3-4 hours), and good luck.
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On October 29 2013 16:58 MidnightGladius wrote: It sounds like you're at UC Berkeley*, where I'm a fourth-year business major. I've known people who underwent a brutal first semester, and I'd urge you to meet with your academic adviser if you haven't already. They will help you examine your options, and it helps to put things into perspective: it's not unusual to have failing midterm grades, especially if you're taking Math 53 with Givental (Russian from hell indeed) and one of the CS 61Xs.
I'd also wish you luck with UGBA 10 and the Haas program, but the class hinges on remembering meaningless factoids to the exclusion of any actual work, and the admissions process takes your GPA (too) heavily into account. If you ever want to chat, send me a PM. Always fun to meet up with fellow TLers/Cal students.
*If you're not actually at UC Berkeley I'm really sorry to jump to the conclusion, and I wish you luck nonetheless :D he is! wow nice guess
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That's probably why CS is so hard. I bet Berkeley is almost as difficult of a CS program as UIUC, or possibly even more difficult.
Well, good luck.
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United States97276 Posts
Do you know if your professor curves? My first semester in college I got one of the teachers who was referred to (unbeknownst to me at the time) as on of the Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse because of how hard his class was for Calc 2. My first test in school I got a 11/30 or roughly 36%. I was crushed because it was by far the worst I had ever done on a test. Second test, I got a 17/30. I thought I was fucked. Turns out, the class average on the tests were like 8/30 and 12/30 so I was actually doing ok and the teacher scaled everything at the end of the semester. You may be doing better than you think.
I had a lot of trouble with CS, too. I found that it just seems to be one of those things where some people have a good mindset for it and others just have to work really hard at it. I wouldn't say it's too late. Finals are typically worth so much that you can earn a big chunk of your grade through that. You may not end up with the A you wanted but it's not the end of the world if you don't have a 4.0.
Also, my school (Georgia Tech) has a thing called "Freshmen Forgiveness" where if you make less than a C in a class in your first 2 semesters at GT you can retake the class and substitute the grade. Have you looked into it if your school has anything like that in place? Have you tried talking to any of your professors about your issues in the class?
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Oh yeah, there's also people you can talk to, like advisors and whatnot. It's probably a good idea to talk to them before the semester is over (as opposed to after)
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On October 29 2013 17:06 Shock710 wrote:Show nested quote +On October 29 2013 16:58 MidnightGladius wrote: It sounds like you're at UC Berkeley*, where I'm a fourth-year business major. I've known people who underwent a brutal first semester, and I'd urge you to meet with your academic adviser if you haven't already. They will help you examine your options, and it helps to put things into perspective: it's not unusual to have failing midterm grades, especially if you're taking Math 53 with Givental (Russian from hell indeed) and one of the CS 61Xs.
I'd also wish you luck with UGBA 10 and the Haas program, but the class hinges on remembering meaningless factoids to the exclusion of any actual work, and the admissions process takes your GPA (too) heavily into account. If you ever want to chat, send me a PM. Always fun to meet up with fellow TLers/Cal students.
*If you're not actually at UC Berkeley I'm really sorry to jump to the conclusion, and I wish you luck nonetheless :D he is! wow nice guess i guessed right too and i dont even go to cal!
cal's CS program is a bit special since it has the EECS program which is in the engineering school but the CS program is in the general school, never heard of any other uni that has that :D
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On October 29 2013 18:40 rabidch wrote:Show nested quote +On October 29 2013 17:06 Shock710 wrote:On October 29 2013 16:58 MidnightGladius wrote: It sounds like you're at UC Berkeley*, where I'm a fourth-year business major. I've known people who underwent a brutal first semester, and I'd urge you to meet with your academic adviser if you haven't already. They will help you examine your options, and it helps to put things into perspective: it's not unusual to have failing midterm grades, especially if you're taking Math 53 with Givental (Russian from hell indeed) and one of the CS 61Xs.
I'd also wish you luck with UGBA 10 and the Haas program, but the class hinges on remembering meaningless factoids to the exclusion of any actual work, and the admissions process takes your GPA (too) heavily into account. If you ever want to chat, send me a PM. Always fun to meet up with fellow TLers/Cal students.
*If you're not actually at UC Berkeley I'm really sorry to jump to the conclusion, and I wish you luck nonetheless :D he is! wow nice guess i guessed right too and i dont even go to cal! cal's CS program is a bit special since it has the EECS program which is in the engineering school but the CS program is in the general school, never heard of any other uni that has that :D UC Davis has it too. in fact i think it has the exact same EECS curriculum as Cal
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On October 29 2013 18:40 rabidch wrote:Show nested quote +On October 29 2013 17:06 Shock710 wrote:On October 29 2013 16:58 MidnightGladius wrote: It sounds like you're at UC Berkeley*, where I'm a fourth-year business major. I've known people who underwent a brutal first semester, and I'd urge you to meet with your academic adviser if you haven't already. They will help you examine your options, and it helps to put things into perspective: it's not unusual to have failing midterm grades, especially if you're taking Math 53 with Givental (Russian from hell indeed) and one of the CS 61Xs.
I'd also wish you luck with UGBA 10 and the Haas program, but the class hinges on remembering meaningless factoids to the exclusion of any actual work, and the admissions process takes your GPA (too) heavily into account. If you ever want to chat, send me a PM. Always fun to meet up with fellow TLers/Cal students.
*If you're not actually at UC Berkeley I'm really sorry to jump to the conclusion, and I wish you luck nonetheless :D he is! wow nice guess i guessed right too and i dont even go to cal! cal's CS program is a bit special since it has the EECS program which is in the engineering school but the CS program is in the general school, never heard of any other uni that has that :D It's like that at my school up here in Canada. I think it's probably the same at a lot of schools if the CS department grew out of the Mathematics department as opposed to the Engineering department. If they grew out of Math, it's probably more likely they become their own department than become subsumed into Engineering.
To address the OP:
If you know the averages for your midterms, you can check how you're doing compared to the rest of the class. If you're sitting above the average, you could probably do better, but you shouldn't be worrying like you are. If you're around the average, you still don't have to worry about failing, but there's a lot of room to improve for the finals.
If you're sitting far below the average, then you need to figure out what's going on. Is the problem being in a new environment and not being able to learn effectively? Is the problem that you aren't applying yourself enough to the material? There's a lot of things that could be going on, and if you're really that dissatisfied with your grades, you should take some time to identify why you're not doing so well.
If you don't understand the material, maybe you should seek help. A lot of schools have help sessions available for first year courses, where upper year students will help with some problems. You can also go talk to the prof. about something you don't understand. If you do understand the material, but are doing bad on the tests, are you taking the tests in the best way? If you get your test back, and all of the things you got wrong were things you more or less knew, but got wrong still, then you should evaluate your test taking strategy, and maybe your mentality going into the test. If it's things you don't know, then make sure you learn them!
Again, the thing to check is if your classes are curved/equalized. A lot of profs shoot for an average around 50% so that it's easier to differentiate grades between their students. If that's the case, unless you're given the grade distribution, you don't really know where you're sitting around.
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i got a 34 on my math midterm. I talked to 2 other people so far and they 18 and 15%. A:H:OGJIEOWIJA:SJG
Good luck to both of us Aeri! we both need it...
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Aeri you're at Berk. Berk has one of the hardest (on par with Stanford's) CS programs in the world. I can't comment on what you should do, but if you're finding that CS is way too hard or that you don't feel like you can hack it, why don't you try out some liberal arts classes and go slower into CS? It's also possible you need to scout out your teachers better dude. If you need anything, PM me .
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I'm 4th year CE, but I had a tough class this semester too. I couldn't understand the prof and weekends spent dedicated to reading the book/notes/assignments did not help. I ended up talking to my program's counselors and got a lot of advice. Then I dropped the course.
I recommend you talk to your counselor too. Especially if you're first year. Things are confusing in first year. Many options are still available including transferring, taking an 'undecided' major. I'm not sure whether you have to take those courses, but if you don't then consider dropping it if you're not interested in it and don't learn from it.
You think you'd be too behind now if you made bad decisions, but now's where you make your decision. In first year, not after 3 years.
If your school's anything like mine, people will tell you first year courses are the weedout courses, and then second year. They're not.
Finally, one thing my friend recommends I try next semester is just to take a ton of courses and drop the ones I don't like or find too difficult to be worthwhile. It's impossible to tell just from a syllabus whether a course is doable especially considering how professors and courses and textbooks change every semester.
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west coast?...
Hang tough, buddy!
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I'm gonna resist the urge to give advice because I'm only a sophomore and I don't really know anything. That said, don't be too hard on yourself. College is hard, and it sounds like Berkeley is particularly hard. I'm sure there are plenty of other people in your situation. If you still want to do CS I think you can still pull it off if you really give it your all. If you decide not to do that, I'm sure you'll find something that you like. We believe in you :D
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You shouldn't be so quick to jump to conclusions. Maybe everyone is struggling and you aren't doing as badly as you think, relatively speaking. Study well and improve your test taking habits, basically do the things that are under your control as well as possible, and leave the rest to fate.
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as a recent business graduate starting to find jobs, here's my opinion: GPA doesn't matter, they rarely care unless you are applying for the trainee programs Major/Specializing doesn't matter, except for marketing or IT your type of degree matters
What you will likely end up with: If you are top notch student, you will be headhunted by recruitment center and join the top companies X years trainee program.
If you are average student (not just GPA, but also the achievements such as work experience), you will be hunting for jobs that usually don't require you to have business degree. this is because: 1. You have to start from Sales generally (or clerk) 2. Sales require you to do some test to get a licence to legally advice people 3. These licence don't require you to have a business degree or anything.
Higher position Administrative jobs etc usually only require bachelor graduates, not necessarily business graduate.
if you want to have a career in business/law, you will really have to work hard to become one of the better graduates (good for you to graduate from Berk, great uni) Law is extremely useful but as far as I know, these type of jobs are rare because if I remember correctly, you need a licence to provide legal advice or something.
(all of these are my own experience. Since I live in Hong Kong which is a pretty well developed Finance center, I hope these helps)
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I didn't spend time reading because I wanted to tell you this.
Drop the classes ASAP to save your GPA
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Baa?21242 Posts
do NOT go into finance just because "business sounds like it might be cool"
unless you know, absolutely, without a trace of doubt, that you like finance, you should not go into it just because of some vague notions of profit/fun/enjoyability
also dont go into law because you like arguing/debating/writing/reading lol
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Oh wow, so many replies >.< Thanks!! I'm still on campus and working on stuff atm but I'll edit in my responses here later. The entry/OP is absolutely horrendous because I felt like shit (still do, the math midterm owned me ofc...there was one problem where I miraculously arrived at a solution somehow, but I said area of triangle = bh instead of half that, so even if if my method was right, I fucked up lol) and I was mostly just letting it all out. I'll reply properly to all y'all later.
+ Show Spoiler +Also 1 star again T.T honestly it doesn't matter at all but it still feels bad haha. Maybe the so-call "one-star ninjas" just do it to everyone, maybe they have certain people they dislike, who knows. Maybe the feeling of the act in itself is enough, maybe it's seeing responses like these that get them their kicks. Whatever's the case, nooo D:
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Like I've been telling ya for months, I've dropped tons of classes to both cut my losses and salvage my jee pee ayy, but more importantly protect my sanity and drive. Think of these things as not failures, but simply delayed successes.
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save your gpa (for reals).
drop drop drop. not worth taking low grades. will really hurt you if you decide to pursue grad school later on. i learned this the hard way.
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You have more of a mind for the humanities anyway
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On October 30 2013 06:50 MountainDewJunkie wrote: Like I've been telling ya for months, I've dropped tons of classes to both cut my losses and salvage my jee pee ayy, but more importantly protect my sanity and drive. Think of these things as not failures, but simply delayed successes.
Its too late for us now... well technically not.
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how old are you? i think if you fall what matters most is you get up and learn from it
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On October 30 2013 07:05 farvacola wrote:You have more of a mind for the humanities anyway  Jesus Christ, farva. Why not just suggest he gets a General Studies degree while he lays here bleeding on the floor?
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Because that's not the same thing at all.
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On October 30 2013 09:00 farvacola wrote: Because that's not the same thing at all. Yes I know... One is called Humanities, the other general studies... shall I explain the yoke?
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This is Aerisky's blog afterall.
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failure is important
every day u just need to get up and go hard
every time you fail u just have to get up and go harder
anytime i start feeling down i clap my hands and shout and i start jumping and yelping. i look at clouds in the sky and i appreciate them and i breathe the air and i appreciate it.
do you know what phase of the moon it is?
go look at the moon and appreciate it and cheer wildly for it and then go hard.
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On October 30 2013 12:36 AiurZ wrote: failure is important
every day u just need to get up and go hard
every time you fail u just have to get up and go harder
anytime i start feeling down i clap my hands and shout and i start jumping and yelping. i look at clouds in the sky and i appreciate them and i breathe the air and i appreciate it.
do you know what phase of the moon it is?
go look at the moon and appreciate it and cheer wildly for it and then go hard. This makes you sound really deranged.
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On October 30 2013 15:22 packrat386 wrote:Show nested quote +On October 30 2013 12:36 AiurZ wrote: failure is important
every day u just need to get up and go hard
every time you fail u just have to get up and go harder
anytime i start feeling down i clap my hands and shout and i start jumping and yelping. i look at clouds in the sky and i appreciate them and i breathe the air and i appreciate it.
do you know what phase of the moon it is?
go look at the moon and appreciate it and cheer wildly for it and then go hard. This makes you sound really deranged. He's a poet, he's paid to be high.
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Everyone has trouble with math sometime along their educational career. It you've made it to multivar without much difficulty already, then you've already done pretty well for yourself. When you do hit that point where you're having difficulties, it's important not to give up, but to work harder. Identify your weaknesses and then work your ass off on them to get better. I know cs is very much related to discrete math, and the same thing applies there. It's incredibly easy to make excuses, and incredibly difficult to take action to work harder, but it will always pay off in the end. You've gotten into UCB already, which I know is very difficult to get into, so you definitley have the ability to succeed in math and cs. The best way to not feel shitty is to know at the end of the day you've given all of your possible efforts into succeeding at your goals. Better than that is when you start seeing the results.
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keep working hard u nerd or start working hard love u
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On October 30 2013 03:33 Carnivorous Sheep wrote: do NOT go into finance just because "business sounds like it might be cool"
unless you know, absolutely, without a trace of doubt, that you like finance, you should not go into it just because of some vague notions of profit/fun/enjoyability
also dont go into law because you like arguing/debating/writing/reading lol
What should he do then? He wouldn't know if he likes finance without taking the classes no?
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aw man, your blog reminds me of how hopeless i've felt at times at like 4am in college with a sht ton of exam or assignments the next morning.
so you're only a first year? it def takes time to figure out how uni classes work, what's the most efficient use of your time, etc. i had my worst gpa as a freshman. sounds like you really need to figure out how to use the resources are available to you. and i'm not just talking about guidance counselors -- but peers in your class [study groups!], upperclassmen with experience in a certain class / field / major... also as mt. dew said above, you've got to be smart about what classes you sign up for and stick with. as much as we would all like college to be some fair, glorious, pure pursuit of knowledge, in a certain sense it's really a game and you have to learn how to navigate (work?) the system. perhaps i'm just jaded, but while going to berkeley will already open up doors, a good gpa will open further doors. not to be disheartened if you've already done poorly your first semester. from what i hear, recruiters like seeing improvement from years 1 - 4 almost as much as they like a perfect record.
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finance rules go into finance quant finance though ib is lame
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