EPTI just had a sudden urge to write about this. Before you read, just know that there really isn't a reason why I'm sharing.
So last year in my Spanish class, there was this girl that was sooo sexy. We'll name her Felicity, as it's not a girl blog if that's not her fake name. So, throughout the year I started to get the feeling that she kind of wanted me (or it, if you know what i mean
. Unfortunately, I was socially awkward (and still am). This meant that I couldn't just walk over and talk to a girl that was already interested. No, my I.Q. was much too high for that. Instead, I took advantage of the fact that we had to speak a lot in our Spanish class. Most of the time, these conversations took place with a partner or a group. I strategically placed myself in certain desks relative to hers in order to maximize the chances I'd be her partner. Luckily, the class before (math class) happened to overlook her path to the Spanish room. So my daily routine was something like this:1. Come up with questions to ask about the material for the first hour
2. Ask as many questions as possible in the last minutes to keep the class in the room past the bell. This step was very important in order to minimize the awkwardness of the next step.
3. Try to stay in the classroom until I saw Felicity walk by. This meant conversations with people I barely know about awkward topics while I awkwardly look out the window instead of at them. Depending on how well I executed step 2, these conversations could last anywhere from 20 seconds to 3 minutes.
4. When Felicity walked by, I immediately blew off the person that I happened to be speaking with and proceeded to Spanish class.
5. Once I arrived, I found the optimal desk for class that day. I even created a general rule that had almost a fifty percent effectiveness rate. (Yes, I kept stats. I had to optimize my rule) Count how many friends she had within arm's length of her, and then sit that many arms-lengths away. If possible, put the same amount of my friends within arms-length of myself.
Despite my best efforts, I wasn't able to capitalize on the situation. Maybe speaking to each other in broken Spanish had something to do with it. (Oh btw, Felicity wasn't the least bit interested according to her friend, lol)
So this year, I met her brother during preseason basketball workouts. He's a freshman who really wasn't nearly good enough to make neither Varsity nor J.V. Even though I knew he wouldn't make the team, I decided to basketball tutor him. Why, you ask? Well, his sister is sooo sexy. So I took him to the Y and I got him in some pick-up games. I made some drills for the both of us to do. I even took him to the weight room once. But the more I hung around this kid, the more I realized that I actually enjoyed his company. Turns out he's just as socially awkward as I was freshman year (I'm getting better in social situations). I couldn't tell you if he enjoyed our time as much as I did, but being seen with the 6'3" senior that averages a double-double couldn't have hurt his social standing.
Alright, here's where it all comes together.
Very recently (a week ago), Felicity came up to me and started a conversation about her brother. Was i nervous? Oh yea. I swear I felt beads of sweat slide down my forehead. But the clear and pre-established conversation topic meant I had at least a small chance to finish the conversation without being awkward. I carefully chose my responses, careful not to make any bad jokes or inadvertently offensive comments (I now realize this resulted in delays in the conversation, meaning I stuttered and made long silences). Luckily, the more I spoke with her, the more she lost her "sexy woman" identity and became like her brother. To my delight, she's actually way more socially awkward than I am. Since then, I speak with Felicity much more (she still doesn't want me).
That's my story, maybe my point could be "Sexy women can be awkward too"
