EPTIt feels like every idea, every thingis disconnected. There is no cause, only effect. Nothing has an effect on anything, everything exists independently, by, for, and of itself. I am hitting keys, and letters are appearing on the screen, but there is no link, they occur and exist independently.
My senses feel like they are rotating in some unknowable direction. I want my head to swivel in that direction, but it does not exist. It exists only in the space between ideas. There is some dimension, some space, some geometry I cannt understand.
There i only one thing at a time. There is no walk and talk, there is barely talk. Conversation is a procession of disconnected sounds. They make sense to me, but I am not sure where that knowledge comes from, it appears in my mind from outside. Some invisible interpreter.
Closing my eyes only makes it worse. I am aware of space acutely. The idea of a thing, existing in some way, so completely. It just is. Eyesight is a phantasy. It gives things a form which does not exist. That thing exists seperately of me seeing it. Giving the thing form constrains it. It is disconnected from what it is, it is not what it is. It is a form forced upon it. I should not perceive the world.
I should not close my eyes, or the world will drift away, more disconnected. Into that unknown geometry.
