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Active: 1525 users

Why nice guys finish last... - Page 3

Blogs > divito
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r.Evo
Profile Joined August 2006
Germany14080 Posts
November 04 2012 16:57 GMT
#41
Show nested quote +
On November 04 2012 19:36 r.Evo wrote:
Edit: "change is an illusion, will be written about in the future" - wat? I don't even... You're saying that if you're a "nice guy" you're born with it, will stay that way, one day find a woman that loves you this way and THEN will dump you for a "bad guy" anyway? Wat.

My statement is more far-reaching than in terms of a relationship. Change, in behavioural aspects, is an illusion. I don't want to cloud up this thread with it right now. I will be trying to write about my theory in the future.

I keep forgetting that people never change and everyone behaves just the same over a period of 50+ years.

Sorry.
"We don't make mistakes here, we call it happy little accidents." ~Bob Ross
Fumanchu
Profile Blog Joined February 2008
Canada669 Posts
November 04 2012 17:21 GMT
#42
I used to be a "nice" guy. I would do all the things they did in the movies. And I would go in with the mindset of, "oh gee it's only been two dates and I don't want to screw things up, I'm gonna wait to the perfect moment to kiss her." And I think that in a nutshell is what a nice guy is. He's someone that waits for the perfect moment to do X. And I think that stems from a lack of confidence and experience.

Now that I have been out with a lot more girls, it's really easy to make these decisions. If I simply feel in the mood, I make a move. Sometimes they respond, sometimes they don't. I don't really take into consideration all the possible extremities before making such a decision because I know that I'm awesome as fuck and some other girl will recognize that if this one doesn't.

Note: This is just a general rule. Each girl is different and if you're looking for something serious, they must be romanced in a different way. However, if you come into a relationship with a different mentality than the one I mentioned, then in my opinion, your chances of anything happening with that girl are very low.
Easy doesnt fit into grownup life.
QuanticHawk
Profile Blog Joined May 2007
United States32135 Posts
November 04 2012 18:20 GMT
#43
Hahahahahahahaha The 2nd paragraph in the op is one of the dumbest most sexist and chauvinistic things I've ever read holy shit
PROFESSIONAL GAMER - SEND ME OFFERS TO JOIN YOUR TEAM - USA USA USA
Kalingingsong
Profile Joined September 2009
Canada633 Posts
Last Edited: 2012-11-04 19:25:09
November 04 2012 19:24 GMT
#44
I'm a nice dude who finds mysterious "bad girls" (who abuse me) to be super attractive. Am I irrational????

(trolol)
Dess.JadeFalcon
MountainDewJunkie
Profile Blog Joined June 2009
United States10346 Posts
November 04 2012 19:47 GMT
#45
There is no wholly applicable formula for getting the girl. When you grow up, the key is compatibility. You don't have to put on a show, or lie, or grovel, or anything. You either work or you don't. Now, this whole bullshit about women gravitating towards "bad" guys is so dismissive... The bottom line is that if you are not a desirable male, you will not be sought after. Whining about the dating scene is just a way to project your failures onto everyone else. Oh, I'm a "nice" guy, I have disadvantage. BZZZT No, you're in denial, and possibly mildly pretentious.

Also, let's grant your premise that women are dumb and go after men that are "bad for them." If these women are so dumb and feeble, then why are you whining about not getting them? Hmm? What is it about these women that make them so desirable to you? Certainly can't be their regard to safety or respect, or intelligence. Could it be... their looks? Sounds a little shallow.

And you're kind of a prick because your blog is laden with stereotypes. Including just the ones about appearances. There's also the common idea that guys with backward hats, gross forearms, and overpriced clothing always treat women poorly. I think if you actually ever knew people in different social rings, you'll find that people really aren't that different. You also don't know what goes on during their more private moments. "Oh, she's with that kind of guy."

Hey, there's plenty of single "nice" women out there, guys! Really nice girls.

But wait a second, we all know what nice really means.

"Hey, what do you think of Brad?"
"Oh he's... he's nice, you know..."

"Nice" may include, but is not limited to, the following:
- not sexy
- unremarkable
- tries too hard
- not pretty
- too fat
- too proud
- emergency back burner
[21:07] <Shock710> whats wrong with her face [20:50] <dAPhREAk> i beat it the day after it came out | <BLinD-RawR> esports is a giant vagina
Scholera
Profile Blog Joined October 2012
United States166 Posts
November 05 2012 00:00 GMT
#46
^ you forgot too shy, timid
Lysteria
Profile Blog Joined November 2008
France2280 Posts
November 05 2012 00:24 GMT
#47
Being nice has nothing to do with the fact someone doesn't have the ability to have any girlfriend.

Like someone else said, often "nice guys" are obsessed by one girl and are so focused, they probably have missed their opportunity with a better match. The best way to find a girl who likes you is to know what kind of girls you like. And it's not as easy as it seems, you have to try to discover yourself.

That's why shy guys have the most difficulties in the world to be in a relationship.
And I don't even want to talk about how sexist it is to think women are all the same.
Garnet
Profile Blog Joined February 2006
Vietnam9045 Posts
November 05 2012 01:19 GMT
#48
totally relevant:
+ Show Spoiler +
[UoN]Sentinel
Profile Blog Joined November 2009
United States11320 Posts
November 05 2012 03:57 GMT
#49
There is a difference between "nice" and "beta".
Нас зовет дух отцов, память старых бойцов, дух Москвы и твердыня Полтавы
QuanticHawk
Profile Blog Joined May 2007
United States32135 Posts
November 05 2012 13:49 GMT
#50
yeah man go read up about pua stuff youll be good in no time
PROFESSIONAL GAMER - SEND ME OFFERS TO JOIN YOUR TEAM - USA USA USA
[UoN]Sentinel
Profile Blog Joined November 2009
United States11320 Posts
November 05 2012 13:54 GMT
#51
Not even. You don't need to be an arrogant douche, just don't come across as a doormat.
Нас зовет дух отцов, память старых бойцов, дух Москвы и твердыня Полтавы
meteorskunk
Profile Blog Joined August 2009
Canada546 Posts
November 05 2012 14:06 GMT
#52
The Jenna Marbles video won the thread already, y'all. Girls are not rejecting me because I'm being too passive. They're rejecting me because i always go for the ridiculously good looking one. Usually she is interested in fashion and money and looking for ways to improve these two areas in her life. That means "rejection" is not failure. It is a lack of compatibility.

w00t




Girl Blog Credentials: Comfortable talking to some women. Tried the sex once
Servius_Fulvius
Profile Joined August 2009
United States947 Posts
November 05 2012 14:32 GMT
#53
On November 04 2012 08:52 divito wrote:
Nice guys are in general cases, far too rational and analytical to allow their instincts to lead them into a potential relationship. They psyche themselves out, whether by thinking they can’t get a woman, or by simply trying too hard.


.......and then they go to facebook/twitter/reddit/public internet outlet and complain about how nice guys finish last.


rezoacken
Profile Joined April 2010
Canada2719 Posts
Last Edited: 2012-11-05 15:50:58
November 05 2012 15:49 GMT
#54
As a side note... I feel its harder to make good friends (you know... the special kind) than getting a "girlfriend".

I need more bros Maybe I should make brodates.
Either we are alone in the Universe or we are not. Both are equally terrifying.
meteorskunk
Profile Blog Joined August 2009
Canada546 Posts
November 05 2012 15:59 GMT
#55
On November 06 2012 00:49 rezoacken wrote:
As a side note... I feel its harder to make good friends (you know... the special kind) than getting a "girlfriend".

I need more bros Maybe I should make brodates.


actually, you get women easier than good homies?? that is actually a problem i never considered for myself. I seem to always get at least one bro whereever i go. maybe we should mix flavours so i can get more chicks
Girl Blog Credentials: Comfortable talking to some women. Tried the sex once
rezoacken
Profile Joined April 2010
Canada2719 Posts
Last Edited: 2012-11-05 16:55:50
November 05 2012 16:51 GMT
#56
On November 06 2012 00:59 meteorskunk wrote:
Show nested quote +
On November 06 2012 00:49 rezoacken wrote:
As a side note... I feel its harder to make good friends (you know... the special kind) than getting a "girlfriend".

I need more bros Maybe I should make brodates.


actually, you get women easier than good homies?? that is actually a problem i never considered for myself. I seem to always get at least one bro whereever i go. maybe we should mix flavours so i can get more chicks


Well to be more precise. If I was still in my native country I would still be seeing my old friends that I know for years. Now that I am in a different country and not really at school anymore I find it way harder to make NEW good friends as a 27yo man.

I have acquaintances, couple friends (friends met with my gf), and people I'd call friends but it's not deep enough. Maybe that's something that will develop once I work in a place for a time idk.
Either we are alone in the Universe or we are not. Both are equally terrifying.
divito
Profile Blog Joined January 2011
Canada1213 Posts
Last Edited: 2012-11-05 17:12:29
November 05 2012 17:04 GMT
#57
On November 05 2012 03:20 QuanticHawk wrote:
Hahahahahahahaha The 2nd paragraph in the op is one of the dumbest most sexist and chauvinistic things I've ever read holy shit

Why is it sexist? Because you're assuming that I think guys are any better? Please, read it again and stop assuming inanities. You suffer almost from the same kool-aid this guy below was drinking.

On November 05 2012 04:47 MountainDewJunkie wrote:
Also, let's grant your premise that women are dumb and go after men that are "bad for them." If these women are so dumb and feeble, then why are you whining about not getting them? Hmm? What is it about these women that make them so desirable to you? Certainly can't be their regard to safety or respect, or intelligence. Could it be... their looks? Sounds a little shallow.

And you're kind of a prick because your blog is laden with stereotypes. Including just the ones about appearances. There's also the common idea that guys with backward hats, gross forearms, and overpriced clothing always treat women poorly. I think if you actually ever knew people in different social rings, you'll find that people really aren't that different. You also don't know what goes on during their more private moments. "Oh, she's with that kind of guy."

Huh, did you even read the blog? Nowhere did I say I was a nice guy, nor was I complaining about me personally. Where did I reference one thing about myself? The "stereotypes," as you name them, were examples; they weren't specific to me or anyone.

I know English comprehension is rough business, especially on an international forum, but I think you're one of the only people to actually think I was referencing anything personal regarding myself in this blog. The only thing personal were the ideas about why nice guys "finish last" contained therein.
Skype: divito7
Deleted User 183001
Profile Joined May 2011
2939 Posts
Last Edited: 2012-11-05 19:21:05
November 05 2012 19:16 GMT
#58
It has nothing with being nice or not. It has to do with attracting women.

I'm unhumanly nice to people, and yet I still get girls regularly. For example, If I was a normal human being, got revenge for when I get screwed over, people would be having it pretty shitty right now. Rather, I let it blow.

I'm a computer engineering major, the epitome of a challenging college curriculum, work ethic, and where you will find the most nerds lol, but I go above and beyond that pathetic status quo. And yet, I still get girls consistently lol. That said, they're girls I seldom see, so it's a lot more challenging than I'd imagine it would be in your case. It is EXTREMELY easy to pull a girl you see and hang out with like on a daily basis haha.
QuanticHawk
Profile Blog Joined May 2007
United States32135 Posts
November 07 2012 15:21 GMT
#59
On November 06 2012 02:04 divito wrote:
Show nested quote +
On November 05 2012 03:20 QuanticHawk wrote:
Hahahahahahahaha The 2nd paragraph in the op is one of the dumbest most sexist and chauvinistic things I've ever read holy shit

Why is it sexist? Because you're assuming that I think guys are any better? Please, read it again and stop assuming inanities. You suffer almost from the same kool-aid this guy below was drinking.

I know English comprehension is rough business, especially on an international forum, but I think you're one of the only people to actually think I was referencing anything personal regarding myself in this blog. The only thing personal were the ideas about why nice guys "finish last" contained therein.


As humans (men & women), we’ve evolved, but not far enough that women (not men) are solely intellectual in their pursuit of men. The majority of women (not men) are still at the mercy of basic biological imperatives and is another crux of why nice guys typically finish last. Nice guys are in general cases, far too rational and analytical (ie women like irrational men) to allow their instincts to lead them into a potential relationship.

I dunno dude, sounds pretty sexist. Maybe you just suck at writing things that make sense if that isn't what you meant?
PROFESSIONAL GAMER - SEND ME OFFERS TO JOIN YOUR TEAM - USA USA USA
divito
Profile Blog Joined January 2011
Canada1213 Posts
November 09 2012 11:45 GMT
#60
On November 08 2012 00:21 QuanticHawk wrote:
As humans (men & women), we’ve evolved, but not far enough that women (not men) are solely intellectual in their pursuit of men. The majority of women (not men) are still at the mercy of basic biological imperatives and is another crux of why nice guys typically finish last. Nice guys are in general cases, far too rational and analytical (ie women like irrational men) to allow their instincts to lead them into a potential relationship.

I dunno dude, sounds pretty sexist. Maybe you just suck at writing things that make sense if that isn't what you meant?

Well, since men don't typically pursue other men, I would have thought that was a given in that statement (in terms of no referencing both sexes). The second statement not specifically referencing men is because of the preceding sentence.

I apologize if I wasn't clear; I didn't think for a second that someone would find my diction sexist.
Skype: divito7
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