On August 03 2012 08:04 asseT wrote: Sometimes I just find listening to music to make me feel better and realize that what acts that may travel through my head aren't worth it, this song is a very good one please listen to it carefully hopefully it will help you realize this action you may commit is truly not one worth the deed for whatever its cause may be but that's just life's rollacoster please don't do the silly thing, think of the people that truly love you and care about your everyday life.
I agree with this... music is awesome and Radiohead would be perfect for you.
You have to find something worth living for. It doesn't matter what it is or how petty it is, but as long as you have some sort of goal, then you can always find your way back on track. Also remember, that even when things look so bad as to the point of hopelessness, it is never too late to get back on your feet.
u have no friends? ur wrong Teamliquid is ur friend and we will always be here to listen to ur troubles, listen to when ur excited, listen to when ur happy and we havnt heard ur "happy" story so please dont do it, u need to live to tell ur happy story (perhaps the day u get married to a wonderful girl who loves u more than the world, and u can share ur experiences with us dont give up yet) and Teamliquid will be here for u Dont kill yourself! LIVE so u can tell ur friend; Teamliquid.
Every life is worth something. You are the only one who has the ability to control that. Trust me, depression does go away, I was depressed as a teenager as well, no matter how hopeless you feel and how bleak things seem, they WILL get better.
I am not a religious person, I consider myself an atheist, but if there is ONE THING that is sacred, it is our life on this earth. DO NOT give that up!
Generally speaking, suicidal thoughts or feelings don't really last too long. Basically a mood shift. There are exceptions, of course, but in general, it's a mood shift. If I were you, I wouldn't kill myself over a mood shift. You have decades of opportunities that you'd be wasting over a brief burst of emotion.
On August 03 2012 08:48 Shock710 wrote: u have no friends? ur wrong Teamliquid is ur friend and we will always be here to listen to ur troubles, listen to when ur excited, listen to when ur happy and we havnt heard ur "happy" story so please dont do it, u need to live to tell ur happy story (perhaps the day u get married to a wonderful girl who loves u more than the world, and u can share ur experiences with us dont give up yet) and Teamliquid will be here for u Dont kill yourself! LIVE so u can tell ur friend; Teamliquid.
On August 03 2012 07:52 HawaiianPig wrote: Well it looks like we're all on the train of giving advice, that's because we've all been where you are to some degree.
I'll offer some up, for the simple purpose of giving you something to read in this time. Something to help you relate to another person.
From what I can tell, you say you're feeling very alone right now. It sounds like there was someone you cared about that you've lost.
Well bro, this is your first lesson in independence.
Happiness, stability, and enjoyment of life begins within yourself. It does not exist in another person. You have to learn to live with yourself before you can live with others.
This is why a lot of the advice you'll see in this thread encourages you to exercise, or find a hobby, or "stick it out".
Enjoy yourself, and you won't have to worry about, as you put it, "leaving your heart here"... because it'll always be with you.
This morose talk of life and death is something you'll look back and call an "existential crisis" when you're more lucid and learned.
This is all very natural.
The key thing to keep reminding yourself is that you'll bounce back. It's what people do. That's what it means to be "a human being." Even if you don't feel fit to call yourself one right now, trust me, you are. The feelings you have right now could not be more human.
A simple realization as this (the happiness in self part) changed my life COMPLETELY. You won't notice it at first, you won't even do it right at first, but you keep telling yourself, you keep believing. I turned my life around in less than a year sticking to good mindframes such as this. Just keep it simple, YOU are the good source of emotion, not others. They leech off of your good emotion.
You're only 16. There's a million things you don't know and don't understand, compared to someone just a few years older than you. And a few years after that there's an unimaginable amount of other things to keep learning and experiencing.
As life goes on you realize that you know less and less. Taking your life is the ultimate act of naivety. Trust that you shouldn't be making the decision to take your life yet, if ever. Your problems may seem insurmountable now, but in the future you'll think with a very different perspective on your past self and past situation.
Dude, we all have low spots, suicide is the ultimate answer, no going back, no OH SHIT DIDN'T MEAN TO DO THAT! Its a permanent answer to a temporary problem. + Show Spoiler +
You can be on the edge, don't its dumb to do that, you will not ever reach a time when you will look back and say, fuck I wish i killed myself then. I promise, don't do it, call suicide hotline, get a psychologist / guidance counselor's attention and talk to them, you will feel better if you let it out.
I have to keep my composure, amidst the insanity... Resigned to the truth that I will not live to see, the dawn of a better day, that might wash away the sadness of this age. I try to keep the voices calling me at bay... Desperately clinging to any futile act of human decency.
Thank you all so much once again for your comments. I desperately want to come out of this in a happy place but the only person who gives me the real hope to do so, I can't be with and they continue to plague my dreams. It sounds really fucking stupid, but its the best thing I feel right now. Maybe I'm made to naturally hurt myself. I know its stupid and of course its emotional, but when I feel like this all the time, it means just so much if there's someone who talking to can lift the pain. I don't know what to do. A painful, shameful obsession with her feels so much better than this. Sc2 can't numb it anymore. Music can't numb it anymore. Even the knife is losing its sharpness.
I need the love. But I know I'm not worth it from anyone. How can I even stand myself when I think I know everyone hates me really. Every sound I hear and thought I have reminds me of death and I'm more scared than I could ever comprehend. I'm sick of the fear and I feel like there's only one way to overcome it. I just don't feel a way out alive
Bro, relax. It will all be fine. Take a deep breath through your nose. Taste the delicious fresh air. Breath out.
Don't worry. This is life. Life is always full of ups and downs. If your down, the only way to go is up. Take a look outside. Look how beautiful the clouds are, ever-changing and rolling across the pristine blue sky, giving way to the golden rays of life and light of the glorious sun. Enjoy it. Everything in life is beautiful. You have everything to gain if u just enjoy the gift of today and tomorrow. But everything to lose if u throw it all away. It will get better, trust me, everyone has been there.
On August 03 2012 20:01 EnE wrote: I have to keep my composure, amidst the insanity... Resigned to the truth that I will not live to see, the dawn of a better day, that might wash away the sadness of this age. I try to keep the voices calling me at bay... Desperately clinging to any futile act of human decency.
Thank you all so much once again for your comments. I desperately want to come out of this in a happy place but the only person who gives me the real hope to do so, I can't be with and they continue to plague my dreams. It sounds really fucking stupid, but its the best thing I feel right now. Maybe I'm made to naturally hurt myself. I know its stupid and of course its emotional, but when I feel like this all the time, it means just so much if there's someone who talking to can lift the pain. I don't know what to do. A painful, shameful obsession with her feels so much better than this. Sc2 can't numb it anymore. Music can't numb it anymore. Even the knife is losing its sharpness.
I need the love. But I know I'm not worth it from anyone. How can I even stand myself when I think I know everyone hates me really. Every sound I hear and thought I have reminds me of death and I'm more scared than I could ever comprehend. I'm sick of the fear and I feel like there's only one way to overcome it. I just don't feel a way out alive
Why would you kill yourself when you obviously have a promising career writing the quotes on the back of tissue boxes?
I'm going to stop picking the scars on mmy arm and let them fade. I'm going to stop adding new ones to my body. I'm going to eat less and excercise again and lose the weight I don't want. Above all I'm going to find a persom who feels the exact same way about me as I do about them. The other girl will still be a friend and ill find a person who makes me happy and lifts away my pain like she does and doesn't cause me to miss her and feel jealous just, not good basically, like we both deserve.
Its 4 pm and I guess ill get out of bed now.
Its not that easy, but ill try again to bang myself into the window to the light, like a fly.
On August 03 2012 20:01 EnE wrote: I have to keep my composure, amidst the insanity... Resigned to the truth that I will not live to see, the dawn of a better day, that might wash away the sadness of this age. I try to keep the voices calling me at bay... Desperately clinging to any futile act of human decency.
Thank you all so much once again for your comments. I desperately want to come out of this in a happy place but the only person who gives me the real hope to do so, I can't be with and they continue to plague my dreams. It sounds really fucking stupid, but its the best thing I feel right now. Maybe I'm made to naturally hurt myself. I know its stupid and of course its emotional, but when I feel like this all the time, it means just so much if there's someone who talking to can lift the pain. I don't know what to do. A painful, shameful obsession with her feels so much better than this. Sc2 can't numb it anymore. Music can't numb it anymore. Even the knife is losing its sharpness.
I need the love. But I know I'm not worth it from anyone. How can I even stand myself when I think I know everyone hates me really. Every sound I hear and thought I have reminds me of death and I'm more scared than I could ever comprehend. I'm sick of the fear and I feel like there's only one way to overcome it. I just don't feel a way out alive
Why would you kill yourself when you obviously have a promising career writing the quotes on the back of tissue boxes?
Ah, yes, I remember when I forced you to click on my BLOG, read it, and then reply to it. That must be why you're reacting aggressively towards me.
Listen. We all go through shitty phases of our life. Phases where we feel like nothing we do is working, and that we will be trapped there forever. We feel like noone else understands us and we should just leave this world. A few weeks ago, I tried marijuana for the first time. I was in a social setting around friends, but as time went on, I felt more and more disconnected and unhappy. Finally I broke through a barrier and looked at my life in the most depressing light possible. Due to the substance, the natural barriers that would prevent me from doing such a painful thing were removed. I then began to cry and feel truly like dying. However, then some friends noticed I was so sad and comforted me. After 5 minutes, I felt much better. It was this experience that taught me that feeling shitty cannot last forever. There is always some way to get better. Even if its just riding out the storm. Stay strong
Also bro, don't get mad at KingCharlie. Hes just trolling/being sacrastic. He's poking fun at your situtation, and trust me in a couple of years, you'll probally find yourself thinking that you were stupid and childish at this point in time.
If you want something more concrete, go read "The Power of Now". I don't know if its for you, but I found it to be very influentual.
EPT
I can't read any replies on this page unfortunately as I have only my mobile and it seems to be full of embedded videos
