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On March 22 2012 07:18 ecstatica wrote:
I have no idea if this is too personal for you to answer but you seem like someone Id want to ask.
- did you ever seriously question your religious beliefs to the point where you werent sure?
- back when you were failing your theology did you still think you were the shit? Did you ever feel mediocre or not special and how did you deal with that?
- do you honestly think you were lucky to get here before the hardworking stage?
- did you or do you look/sleep with other women after you got married?
- did you ever think for a second your marriage was a mistake and what did you tell yourself?
- do you really believe in genepool?
ahh the questions aren't directed at me but in psyc genepool and biology is like maybe 50% of divience.
but yeah uhhh anyways i just want to say that is post is amazing. i wish i had the balls to write my heart out like you man. the things you write about are extremely important and helpful. i've grown tremendously as a person from just reading your blogs and from reading the books you recommened awhile back. "jack welch, good to great, essential drucker"
hopefully i write something meaningful on teamliquid as well ^__^
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On March 22 2012 10:16 jodogohoo wrote:Show nested quote +On March 22 2012 07:18 ecstatica wrote:
I have no idea if this is too personal for you to answer but you seem like someone Id want to ask.
- did you ever seriously question your religious beliefs to the point where you werent sure?
- back when you were failing your theology did you still think you were the shit? Did you ever feel mediocre or not special and how did you deal with that?
- do you honestly think you were lucky to get here before the hardworking stage?
- did you or do you look/sleep with other women after you got married?
- did you ever think for a second your marriage was a mistake and what did you tell yourself?
- do you really believe in genepool? ahh the questions aren't directed at me but in psyc genepool and biology is like maybe 50% of divience.
www.economics.cornell.edu/dbenjamin/IQ-SNPs-PsychSci-20111205-accepted.pdf
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On March 22 2012 11:54 ecstatica wrote:Show nested quote +On March 22 2012 10:16 jodogohoo wrote:On March 22 2012 07:18 ecstatica wrote:
I have no idea if this is too personal for you to answer but you seem like someone Id want to ask.
- did you ever seriously question your religious beliefs to the point where you werent sure?
- back when you were failing your theology did you still think you were the shit? Did you ever feel mediocre or not special and how did you deal with that?
- do you honestly think you were lucky to get here before the hardworking stage?
- did you or do you look/sleep with other women after you got married?
- did you ever think for a second your marriage was a mistake and what did you tell yourself?
- do you really believe in genepool? ahh the questions aren't directed at me but in psyc genepool and biology is like maybe 50% of divience. www.economics.cornell.edu/dbenjamin/IQ-SNPs-PsychSci-20111205-accepted.pdf
i read the discussion and conclusion and it's pretty damn solid from the looks of it. I'm not qualified to really give a meaningful opinion but hmm... it doesn't really offer another explaination why people would think there is genetic herability. it sort of disproves the theory we have which i feel is legit, but doesn't offer another one =x
the evidence is that within familes there seems to be capacity for intelligence but ofc that might just be ses and environmental factors.... ahh complicated buisness T.T;;
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Hey Mighty, thanks for your contributions to TL. I really enjoy the stuff you write about and I see a lot of experiences you've had that apply to my own life as well.
I often think about the stages in life that people go through and I get the feeling that you are in the "work as hard as I can" stage, which is admirable because, like you said, you need to make as much money in the time that you have to make that money. But from my own experiences (though I'm only 23) work is not the be all end all and there needs to come a point where you need to take the time to appreciate what you have.
Let me explain:
The whole of my 23 years has been enveloped in the oil industry of Alberta. However, when I was born was the year the the bottom fell out of the oil patch, so my family had to move to Ontario for a couple years so that we could survive (I was only 2 so when I say we, I mean my parents). In that time my Dad was working a shitty job just to put food on the table for my family and he came to a realization (one that you've touched on) and that's to work harder than anyone else for as long as you so that you have an edge to get you to the top. It's not so much in the interest of success that has been key for my Dad, but more about the interest of survival. And because of the endeavors of my Dad, I have been brought up in a life of great opportunity, which I am eternally grateful for (just so long as I was willing to work and capitalize on that opportunity). But I've also come to understand the harsh reality that is: everything can be taken away from you in an instant with no regards to what is fair and just. You see, in order to rise to the top of the oil patch (and I mean oil baron top) you need to become a tough son of a bitch. If you've ever seen the movie "There will be blood" with Daniel Day Lewis, you can get an understanding of the kind of men that are bred in this industry, but with less murder. It's a rise that has you not going to work, but going to battle every day and exposing yourself to a great amount of stress. And, from the sounds of it, you probably understand this stress well. But due to decades of exposing himself to this stress, my Dads body deteriorated. It wasn't due to poor diet or anything like that because his arteries were clean (even though his weight was in the 250lb range). Instead, the deterioration came purely from severe hypertension that wore out his aorta to such an extent that it dissected. They straight up told as they were wheeling him into surgery that there was nothing they could do and that he was going to die. My Dad, a man who worked his ass off for the sole purpose of survival was dying because of working too hard . . . literally. It didn't matter what he did, I mean, what can he do? Everything he's worked for, the name, the title, the millions of dollars cannot save him now.
Luckily for my Dad, he survived by a hair, quite literally. If it wasn't for the hair thin membrane surrounding his aorta he would have died in an instance from massive over bleeding. Not only that, but he happened to be operated on by one of the premier heart surgeons in the country (if not the world), performing what was very much an experimental surgery (due to the shear complexity of my dad's case). For things to transpire the way they did was nothing short of a miracle. But the fact remains that in matters of life and death, things become simple very quick and everything you've done, counts for little at that moment. All the money and/or notoriety in the world wouldn't have changed the fact that my dad would have been dead, my mom left without a husband and my sisters and I without a dad -- and that's not mentioning the impact on my grandmother, aunts, uncles, and cousins.
So to wrap things up. I've spent a lot of time around very successful and powerful people and the same thing can be said for all of them: you need to make the most of the time you're given. You have an opportunity to work now and so you should make the most of that opportunity by working hard. However, you also have the opportunity, right now, to live. You never know when you are going to be ripped away from this earth and forced to leave everything you love and have worked for behind, so, much like you capitalize on the time you have to work, capitalize on the time you have to enjoy life.
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On March 22 2012 13:56 RBKeys wrote:
Hey Mighty, thanks for your contributions to TL. I really enjoy the stuff you write about and I see a lot of experiences you've had that apply to my own life as well.
I often think about the stages in life that people go through and I get the feeling that you are in the "work as hard as I can" stage, which is admirable because, like you said, you need to make as much money in the time that you have to make that money. But from my own experiences (though I'm only 23) work is not the be all end all and there needs to come a point where you need to take the time to appreciate what you have.
Let me explain:
The whole of my 23 years has been enveloped in the oil industry of Alberta. However, when I was born was the year the the bottom fell out of the oil patch, so my family had to move to Ontario for a couple years so that we could survive (I was only 2 so when I say we, I mean my parents). In that time my Dad was working a shitty job just to put food on the table for my family and he came to a realization (one that you've touched on) and that's to work harder than anyone else for as long as you so that you have an edge to get you to the top. It's not so much in the interest of success that has been key for my Dad, but more about the interest of survival. And because of the endeavors of my Dad, I have been brought up in a life of great opportunity, which I am eternally grateful for (just so long as I was willing to work and capitalize on that opportunity). But I've also come to understand the harsh reality that is: everything can be taken away from you in an instant with no regards to what is fair and just. You see, in order to rise to the top of the oil patch (and I mean oil baron top) you need to become a tough son of a bitch. If you've ever seen the movie "There will be blood" with Daniel Day Lewis, you can get an understanding of the kind of men that are bred in this industry, but with less murder. It's a rise that has you not going to work, but going to battle every day and exposing yourself to a great amount of stress. And, from the sounds of it, you probably understand this stress well. But due to decades of exposing himself to this stress, my Dads body deteriorated. It wasn't due to poor diet or anything like that because his arteries were clean (even though his weight was in the 250lb range). Instead, the deterioration came purely from severe hypertension that wore out his aorta to such an extent that it dissected. They straight up told as they were wheeling him into surgery that there was nothing they could do and that he was going to die. My Dad, a man who worked his ass off for the sole purpose of survival was dying because of working too hard . . . literally. It didn't matter what he did, I mean, what can he do? Everything he's worked for, the name, the title, the millions of dollars cannot save him now.
Luckily for my Dad, he survived by a hair, quite literally. If it wasn't for the hair thin membrane surrounding his aorta he would have died in an instance from massive over bleeding. Not only that, but he happened to be operated on by one of the premier heart surgeons in the country (if not the world), performing what was very much an experimental surgery (due to the shear complexity of my dad's case). For things to transpire the way they did was nothing short of a miracle. But the fact remains that in matters of life and death, things become simple very quick and everything you've done, counts for little at that moment. All the money and/or notoriety in the world wouldn't have changed the fact that my dad would have been dead, my mom left without a husband and my sisters and I without a dad -- and that's not mentioning the impact on my grandmother, aunts, uncles, and cousins.
So to wrap things up. I've spent a lot of time around very successful and powerful people and the same thing can be said for all of them: you need to make the most of the time you're given. You have an opportunity to work now and so you should make the most of that opportunity by working hard. However, you also have the opportunity, right now, to live. You never know when you are going to be ripped away from this earth and forced to leave everything you love and have worked for behind, so, much like you capitalize on the time you have to work, capitalize on the time you have to enjoy life.
This is indeed correct!
As moms and dads always say, health comes first! Without being healthy, what is the purpose and point of doing anything? Work hard, stay healthy, and enjoy the ripening fruit. In my opinion, there is no greater pain than to suffer without seeing the result of your hard work.
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On March 19 2012 12:20 mizU wrote:Show nested quote +On March 19 2012 12:12 MightyAtom wrote:On March 19 2012 04:31 mizU wrote:
Oh my god. I'm glad I read all of that.
You're so amazing 형.
From my point of view it seems like in Korea there isn't much room for advancement. You kind of get stuck in a class and can't really "jump" ahead, unless of course you get really lucky, but then again, I guess that's how it is any capitalist environment. How would you compare the opportunities of advancement to Korea? I don't really know the deep financial sides to Korea, so maybe you could enlighten me?
I know my friends at KU are going to get pretty good jobs because of the whole SKY network, and it seems like it's getting easier to get in (than before), but I still seem to have a lack of understanding on the whole socio-economic structure. At your campus of KU, it is easier, but not the main campus in Anam; but even the entire SKY thing is becoming tougher, with it really only being a Seoul Uni thing- but basically - if you don't have parental support and networks or coming from a great uni or overseas uni, you're screwed. -.- I suppose I didn't quite realize. Though a lot of my friends that are now seniors transferred to Anam for their last year. Does that means your kids are set, and probably going to KU?
I think the biggest thing is that even with all the advantages I can give them, their future still isn't set, especially if I can't give them a big leg up financially. Now of course they have a lot of advantages and I'm sure that with or without my assistance they will do well, but a majority of how 'less difficult' it will be will because of who their parents and that will automatically open x number of doors even if we don't meet the people. That is how it was with me and my wife, we still worked hard like mofos, but to get that foot in the door was of course extremely easier, instead of fighting it out with 1000 people, we fought it out with maybe 10 or 20 other people as qualified in both background/education.
Up to 20 years ago, going to KU guaranteed success, but I'd say about 8 years ago or so that did change dramatically, nowadays nothing is guaranteed, that being said, you graduate from Seoul Korea or Yonsei, and you're in the top 5% of the work force automatically, but likely only from Seoul University has a guaranteed formula for success still. But the entire system is outdated, without any real replacement. I expect some type of blow up within the next 10 years, either that or half the population just giving up...
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On March 19 2012 12:59 don_kyuhote wrote:Should have bought them KJV...  reading this blog kind of reminded me of what some pastor told me when I was in high school: "A lot of people who grow up in churches stop going to church when they enter college, but come back when they have children."
That is very common, but I've never stopped going to church, just stopped reading the bible entirely. I use to read the bible about a hour and half every day, then when I got into seminary for grad school, I studied it for 4 hours a day. I can tell when a minister is misquoting the bible out of context or he/she didn't actually prepare enough for the sermon, but more than a social or moralistic stance with church or Christianity, I just became very disillusioned with the role or profession of being a clergy or being a professor in that particular field.
But it is true a lot of people go back to church when they have children, but again, it probably is for more the 'morality' of the church setting. Which is nothing bad or good. ^^
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On March 19 2012 13:42 Wrongspeedy wrote:Show nested quote +On March 19 2012 11:56 MightyAtom wrote:On March 19 2012 03:08 Agama wrote:
Just curious, how old are your sons? Also good read. First son, Ethan is 3.5 years, and second son Mark is 11 months. Thx, and I've already applied them for high school already lol. Make sure to spend the time with them. You can't take that back once its done. My Dad was busy working for almost nothing my entire childhood, because of that I can hardly have any good memories of my childhood with my Dad. I only remember when he was angry at me or made me cry. Good read, glad you didn't delete it.
Well, I'll do the best I can, thing is, when you're a dad and you're the only breadwinner, the focus becomes taking care of the family as how you show your love. Of course in retrospect, all fathers will have wanted to spend more time with their kids, and I don't think I had an especially good relationship with my father as well, but when I got older, at least I could understand where he was coming from. Now, very late in his life, do we have a very good relationship, but it is hard when you are working for certain goals to create balance, but I'd like to think that by giving up my corporate job I've already taken a step in the right direction.
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On March 19 2012 17:01 theobsessed1 wrote:haven't posted on this forum in years but this was a great read i just had to comment it's something i definitely need to chew on but i think there's an unbelievable amount of wisdom in this post thanks for that and thanks for not deleting; i think it was a blessing realizing there's people who think similarly to me, even when you're roughly 15 years older than I am saving this in case it disappears 
Thx ^^ TL is full of like minded geeks keke.
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On March 19 2012 18:48 Boonbag wrote:Show nested quote +On March 19 2012 11:55 MightyAtom wrote:On March 19 2012 02:50 Boonbag wrote:
Jesus you're 110 kg
wtf man Not everyone can look like a model forever, like you kaka, I'm fucking ajushi now! calbi addiction is something
and beer, soju and whiskey as well. ^^
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On March 19 2012 20:55 MisterD wrote:Show nested quote +On March 19 2012 12:21 MightyAtom wrote:On March 19 2012 07:14 MisterD wrote:noo never delete stuff like this, it's so important! i remember a ted talk from some absolutely weird looking dude who was advertising putting money into research for prolonging life. He was convinved, that the children being born within the last 5 years could basically become immortal due to medical advancements by the time they were old enough for it to matter. And he gave a nice motivation as to why fighting natural death should be very important. It was something along these lines: Do you consider the burnt down library of alexandria to be a tragic loss? Well, imagine, the life knowledge of one person was equal to one book (which is obviously a ridiculous underestimation). Then, by natural death alone, each year, the equivalent of three libraries of alexandria is lost. Just the relation of once a few centuries ago to three times a year, and that by using a horrendous underestimation, really gives an interesting perspective. Now, while he was motivating research for avoiding death, you can even easier use this comparison to just line out the importance of life knowledge. And that to me makes texts such as yours here just so very important. You cannot buy any book that gives you such rather personal bits of knowledge. This is the kind of knowledge, people would learn by listening to the town elders in previous times. But with that happening less and less today because families move apart a lot more and divorce rates increasing (or even coming into existence in the first place, depending on the time span), it's blogs like these that i feel need to happen more often, because they offer similar wisdom. I completely understand, that posting this can be hard and inconvenient because it's personal and sometimes contains revealing weaknesses, stuff that just doesn't feel good or right to even write, much less post. But next time your are facing this question, i'd like you to know that you would make me really sad if you don't post it :p This stuff is gold. It's certainly a good read and good lessons to be learned. But i think, on top of that, it is kind of important actually, to have more of this in a general society kind of view (that sounds weird Oo). see, i have the same feeling now ^^ i think i've drifted into weird territories and probably written complete gibberish, and now i don't think i should post it. But i'll do it, cause your blogs are just to good to not try and get more of them :D And if none of the above made any sense, just take it as a "thanks for posting this, love it! give more!" Sincerely, thanks, I do know how you are talking about as well- Ray- but yeah, you can have all this info on the net, but in terms of really finding insight into something more day-to-day, really only comes from learning directly from others- I kinda always feel when I am writing on TL that I'm writing to everyone who if I did meet I would get along with in a unique way because we are gamers, we are more on the inquisitive side and it is just as though we are this tribe. Honestly I'm such a macho Korean guy - but when it comes to hanging out with young gamers, I just become giddy and stupid because I'm just so comfortable. When I used to control and a lot of marketing spend, I use to fly into Taipei or Hong Kong and my clients would organize 9 other guys to play dota against of 3 other guys to play 2v2 SCBW against cause I didn't want to go drinking but play games in my off time. lol. It was cheaper for them than to buy me whiskey and a private room, than to call up their friend and find how who played dota and to leave me with them to lan for 5 hours. ^^ But thanks, I'm a bit embarrassed that the comparison you give is a bit too grand, but as long as you guys get a bit out of it, its more than enough for me as well. After all I have to contribute somehow ^^ Yay! Gamers unite! ("real" gamers anyways ^^) Sorry, that wasn't my intention  the comparison is grand, yes, but you're not in it alone obviously. You're just doing a good job with your part ^^ But there's tons of other people out there too, even some who are smart.
We can only do our part ^^ and those TED talks are good/nutty lol.
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On March 22 2012 02:02 YoucriedWolf wrote:
I hope you realize that you play a huge part in all that makes TL great there is no one who could mimic the level of insight that you bring to us in your specific fields and we are very lucky to have you.
As a bit of an un-believer it always makes me very happy to hear stories about people finding actual 'salvation' in the bible, thank you for this 5/5 post!
thx ^^ I don't know if I can say I found 'salvation' in the bible per say, but it is one of the major pillars of my worldview. And I don't mean that in any new age way, I'm pretty conservative in what my faith is in- but I'm also pretty simple about it as well. It's all about love. Sometimes I forget that love isn't about the ones around you, but to those who simply could use it. Very idealist and naive sounding I know, and that is probably the most difficult thing about it.
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On March 22 2012 02:26 BLinD-RawR wrote:
Truly excellent read Hyung!
^^* gamsah
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On March 22 2012 03:03 htn2481 wrote:
That was a very interesting post and glad you didn't delete it as others have said. Your post reminds me of a book I read about 2 years ago called "The Last Lecture". It was written by a college professor who was in the last stages of a terminal disease. He did the lecture for his children (2 sons and daughter, I believe). He knew he didn't have time to really raise them and teach them as he'd like as he was going to die. He tried to squeeze as much as he could that he wanted them to learn in life. It was quite moving and the whole video can be found online. He passed away a fews months after. I really tried to take the message home that tomorrow isn't promised today.
Personally, I've tried to think of how I'd live my life if I knew I would die tomorrow. It makes me do stupid sentimental things but at the end of the day, I know I've got nothing to regret. I've lived my life to the fullest and tried to the best of my ability with what I am given. I have a young 6 mo. old son myself and I try to cherish every moment with him and my wife as well. Life is short. Everyone gets older and you may have lost your "aura" but it may have been passed to your sons instead. I think and hope that my son will remember me by the times we spent together.
I will probably read your old posts to glean over the pearls of wosdom you've shared. Thanks.
Thank you for sharing that, I feel the same way, I don't know what kind of father I'll be at the end of it all, but whatever time and love I can share now, I hope it will be with them whether I'm around or not. Post of this nature, I mean the only way I could really write it out and not feel too self-concious about it was to think that that it was for my sons. ^^
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On March 22 2012 03:08 Scarecrow wrote:I wish TL had a subscribe feature just for MightyAtom. Always dropping such insight on us from a stage in life that most of us won't see for a good 10-20 years. I hope you make the time to get your aura back in the Master's eyes. Thanks for the read
Ha, I went to practice yesterday, challenged the jujitsu instructor, and I mean I really did challenge him, lol. We started stand up and when for about 10 mins straight, I tapped out from exhaustion not from getting submitted, but I literally had zero breath left, so I guess that is even worse. ^^ But, 10 years comes quick enough, hehe.
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On March 22 2012 06:41 Bunn wrote:
That was a great read. I have to digest this for some time.
Also don't delete posts/letters like that! These kinds of things are good for you mentally!
This is true, at least it will prevent the onslaught of dementia in my old age keke. ^^
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I really do love all your blog posts. Btw I'm curious, what did you do for your undergraduate degree? Theology is an interesting choice for grad school to say the least.
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On March 22 2012 07:18 ecstatica wrote:
I have no idea if this is too personal for you to answer but you seem like someone Id want to ask.
1. - did you ever seriously question your religious beliefs to the point where you werent sure?
2. - back when you were failing your theology did you still think you were the shit? Did you ever feel mediocre or not special and how did you deal with that?
3. - do you honestly think you were lucky to get here before the hardworking stage?
4. - did you or do you look/sleep with other women after you got married?
5. - did you ever think for a second your marriage was a mistake and what did you tell yourself?
6. - do you really believe in genepool?
I've numbered them in your quote to answer them.
1. yes, even to the point of refusing to believe. but it comes down to it, if you really want to know, then if God is really God, then question the hell out of him, after all, he is God. lol.
2. Up to that point, I always thought I was the shit, but some of my professors went out their way to 'teach me' humility. I am not a humble person as an expression of personality, and am I humble, no- but I do know myself very clearly, I know when I do know and do not know, so in my view, I'm humble enough- but relative to most people of course no one would say I'm humble- but at least I realize that I'm mostly not and try to correct it on some occasions. But I won't be humble for the sake of looking humble, seriously fuck that. I'm not living to please people's perceptions.
But for those times that I did feel mediocre and not special, I was of course depressed and felt aimless and what that time taught me is that, humility is not my defining characteristic and never will be. I've never taken the route well traveled and because of the route I chose, and lets call a spade a spade instead of pretending it is something else. I have always been the one to take the lead, but also I'm also the one who will take the bullet for the team. Humility will never be in the top 10 words to describe me, and nor should it be.
The one thing I am thankful for that time is that while they tried to break me and succeeded for a while, the confidence that took the former's place was one that was painstakenly rebuilt, and I don't think can be crushed again, at least not just by the opinions of others. You come full circle but this time it is deliberate. But, when I was down and out, I simply, questioned and kept plodding along until I realized that this wasn't for me. It isn't to say I gave up, but, I left all those years of study behind for what it was and without any expectations more on it.
3.Luck, timing, always plays a role in it, but here is the kicker: I never stopped going for it, so I was always preparing and being in a position to take advantage of opportunities. Some kids come from extremely wealthy families, full connected, but do coke all day long and while they are lucky as hell, never try to go for anything. Some other kids, try like motherfukers, but just aren't in any position to get a break. Just being born into the family that I have, even without any help, just the way they raised me, I appreciate it. Made me appreciate others.
I've been burned as many times or more than I've been helped, but at the end of the day, I don't think we try because we know we are going to succeed, rather we try because it's all that we got and we make do or work it out from there.
4. This is an extremely inappropriate question that would foolish for anyone to answer who wasn't someone close to you and that you could put in context. The biggest reason, is not that it is on the public forum, but that it is very easy to make a very superficial judge of someone's character because the answer will always supercede the intent of the question. So let me answer both 4 and 5 together and answer what the question is perhaps really asking.
Any decision you make that has lifelong or very extreme or significant implications on your life, like marriage or committing to love only one for the rest of your life will ALWAYS be riddled with a lot of doubt, questions and unrest, EVEN after the decision is made- simply because, the gravity of the situation demands it.
If you simply 'fell in love' and got married the next day in Vegas, the chances of that marriage working out is close to zero (while it happens, I'm sure, they must live pretty simple lives in the first place). If you have two big job promotions, but one is in NY or one is Hong Kong, whatever you choose you will wonder, what if.
The older most of my juniors get, the more that they are in angst about getting married, and I say, look, at age 30, if you think getting married will be a bed of roses, then I think you've been taking too many drugs or are still a virgin. But when you understand what you're really getting into, then you're actually at that time most ready for it.
But at the end of the day, the choices we make, it is still up to us whether or not we made those choices in good faith or not. By their nature, it not the easy choice either way, but to also say, that you simply make the one time decision and that it is final, is also bullshit as well, you will be forced to reaffirm that choice until the choice is no longer a choice, but really part of your life.
I've been directly propositioned many times by women who knew that I was married and wanted to be my mistress and in many different countries (when I was in a position of public influence- even made the cover of some Hong Kong celebrity gossip magazines that I was secretly dating some swimsuit models). But I made a choice to be married and not have a mistress or two. Were these ladies hot? Was I admiring their bodies? Was I flirting back? Am I am man? hell yes.
But at the end of the day, we try, we try and we try some more, and we can fail and continue to try until it is no a choice any longer but who we are. The woman I married, was the woman who I knew made me a better man. That was what I based things on, for others, if the woman you want to marry is the one who is the hottest or the most sexy or the most charming, then I can't see how you're not going to live you life without doubting or questioning.
At the end of the day, why do we make those types of decisions, those big ones. Is it because we have to, or we feel pressured into it and just basically flip a coin, or is it because we are looking for something specific? Single out the thing that maters most to you and if you've made your decision based on that, then really, there was no other choice. Then own that decision you made and man the fuck up.
But if there was any doubt, watching my wife give birth to my two sons and seeing my sons grow, even as young as they are, I wouldn't trade them and my wife for the hundreds of enticing ballerinas which circled my head like angels for many years.
6. It's not believe or not believe, there is a gene pool, after all most of us Koreans look a like for a reason, lol (and I'm just assuming what you mean by genepool- so just sort out my definition, if it isn't the same, well, keke). But the issue is saying whether is one is better than other etc,then you get judged by all the people who are outraged to suggest that people aren't all equal and life really isn't fair etc...I'm not going to say one race is better than other race; you'll always find exceptions in every situation and while stereotypes abound, with whatever true they hold or don't; it all doesn't matter. Why, because it isn't applicable.
But for me, when I talk about genepool or what I have or what my sons will have, its about simply understanding the potential. That in certain ways, they have this or that potential. Whether or not they fulfill it is up to a number of factors. Most of it is desire. Desire can supercede talent given that desire has enough time.
I can always tell, in what I'm good at or very good at, who is better than me; whether it be business or whatever. But I'm also good at understanding why he/she is better than me and then learning and then finally being better. Most people are one trick ponies and even if you aren't, you eventually will be. But the one true benefit of good gene pool is the frequency, the amount and the shorten time period of getting to good results; providing there is passion and desire; but it is a lot rarer and harder to come by than you'd think.
Especially if you do have good potential or a good supportive environment, the 'hunger' usually is lacking. But I'm also talking about not the averages, but achievement at the highest possible levels, that does take a certain level of talent to start off with plus the hard work.
But I guess my point is, I know that the genius exists with my people to figure out what to do next for our country; and I know we have to potential to figure it out, and I just want to one day assist in at least providing opportunities for that desire.
Thanks for the questions: I know that they are addressing something more than just my post, so I hope that it was helpful in any way. ^^
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Korea (South)1897 Posts
On March 22 2012 10:16 jodogohoo wrote:Show nested quote +On March 22 2012 07:18 ecstatica wrote:
I have no idea if this is too personal for you to answer but you seem like someone Id want to ask.
- did you ever seriously question your religious beliefs to the point where you werent sure?
- back when you were failing your theology did you still think you were the shit? Did you ever feel mediocre or not special and how did you deal with that?
- do you honestly think you were lucky to get here before the hardworking stage?
- did you or do you look/sleep with other women after you got married?
- did you ever think for a second your marriage was a mistake and what did you tell yourself?
- do you really believe in genepool? ahh the questions aren't directed at me but in psyc genepool and biology is like maybe 50% of divience. but yeah uhhh anyways i just want to say that is post is amazing. i wish i had the balls to write my heart out like you man. the things you write about are extremely important and helpful. i've grown tremendously as a person from just reading your blogs and from reading the books you recommened awhile back. "jack welch, good to great, essential drucker" hopefully i write something meaningful on teamliquid as well ^__^
hehe, good on you for reading them! Everything in time and I'm sure you're kicking some booty right now!
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Korea (South)1897 Posts
On March 22 2012 13:56 RBKeys wrote:
Hey Mighty, thanks for your contributions to TL. I really enjoy the stuff you write about and I see a lot of experiences you've had that apply to my own life as well.
I often think about the stages in life that people go through and I get the feeling that you are in the "work as hard as I can" stage, which is admirable because, like you said, you need to make as much money in the time that you have to make that money. But from my own experiences (though I'm only 23) work is not the be all end all and there needs to come a point where you need to take the time to appreciate what you have.
Let me explain:
The whole of my 23 years has been enveloped in the oil industry of Alberta. However, when I was born was the year the the bottom fell out of the oil patch, so my family had to move to Ontario for a couple years so that we could survive (I was only 2 so when I say we, I mean my parents). In that time my Dad was working a shitty job just to put food on the table for my family and he came to a realization (one that you've touched on) and that's to work harder than anyone else for as long as you so that you have an edge to get you to the top. It's not so much in the interest of success that has been key for my Dad, but more about the interest of survival. And because of the endeavors of my Dad, I have been brought up in a life of great opportunity, which I am eternally grateful for (just so long as I was willing to work and capitalize on that opportunity). But I've also come to understand the harsh reality that is: everything can be taken away from you in an instant with no regards to what is fair and just. You see, in order to rise to the top of the oil patch (and I mean oil baron top) you need to become a tough son of a bitch. If you've ever seen the movie "There will be blood" with Daniel Day Lewis, you can get an understanding of the kind of men that are bred in this industry, but with less murder. It's a rise that has you not going to work, but going to battle every day and exposing yourself to a great amount of stress. And, from the sounds of it, you probably understand this stress well. But due to decades of exposing himself to this stress, my Dads body deteriorated. It wasn't due to poor diet or anything like that because his arteries were clean (even though his weight was in the 250lb range). Instead, the deterioration came purely from severe hypertension that wore out his aorta to such an extent that it dissected. They straight up told as they were wheeling him into surgery that there was nothing they could do and that he was going to die. My Dad, a man who worked his ass off for the sole purpose of survival was dying because of working too hard . . . literally. It didn't matter what he did, I mean, what can he do? Everything he's worked for, the name, the title, the millions of dollars cannot save him now.
Luckily for my Dad, he survived by a hair, quite literally. If it wasn't for the hair thin membrane surrounding his aorta he would have died in an instance from massive over bleeding. Not only that, but he happened to be operated on by one of the premier heart surgeons in the country (if not the world), performing what was very much an experimental surgery (due to the shear complexity of my dad's case). For things to transpire the way they did was nothing short of a miracle. But the fact remains that in matters of life and death, things become simple very quick and everything you've done, counts for little at that moment. All the money and/or notoriety in the world wouldn't have changed the fact that my dad would have been dead, my mom left without a husband and my sisters and I without a dad -- and that's not mentioning the impact on my grandmother, aunts, uncles, and cousins.
So to wrap things up. I've spent a lot of time around very successful and powerful people and the same thing can be said for all of them: you need to make the most of the time you're given. You have an opportunity to work now and so you should make the most of that opportunity by working hard. However, you also have the opportunity, right now, to live. You never know when you are going to be ripped away from this earth and forced to leave everything you love and have worked for behind, so, much like you capitalize on the time you have to work, capitalize on the time you have to enjoy life.
Thanks for sharing and yes I do completely understand and I don't think anyone would disagree with the advice, but ask anyone if we'd do it all again in the same way, I don't know if we all would.
You hear at every great commencement speech someone great who has accomplished so much stand up and say, "I've done this and that, but I regret not having more balance in my life, you should remember that', but it is the nature of achievement. Even if you make it, when do you quit? And what your dad does to get to that point, when you say 'work,' I know what that really means, but a lot of people still have no idea what really working like there is no tomorrow that it is like you are buried 10 feet under ground and you need to claw your way up for air, then it is the same day every day. I understand that kind of work. But what motivates a man to do that, is what also blinds him as to when he should stop or not.
I already made that choice when I resigned from my exec position which paid a lot, but didn't leave me any space, both mentally and with my family. But much like your father, I also have expectations that I wish to take on. It's unlikely that I will go down that extreme path, but just by the nature of the job, you become a hard man and it is hard to break away from that which produces those achievements.
Finance has this phrase, 'what is your magic number?' cause if you're in sales/trading, there is only so much you can handle because the stress is that bad, and so what the magic number is, 'how much do you need to make to quit the industry and retire?' Unfortunately my magic number is a bit high, but hopefully I'll hit it before 60 and retire then ^^ but point taken and thanks.
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