How to be friends with girls when you have a gf? - Page 4

On February 17 2012 00:14 Kukaracha wrote:


You could simply say how old you are.

On February 17 2012 00:31 Onlinejaguar wrote:
I wish i had OP's problem lol. How can girls liking you ever be a problem? unless you have absolutely 0 self control.

On February 17 2012 01:00 Kukaracha wrote:
Of course age has to do something with it. With different steps in one's life come different questions. Add to this the fact that 2 hours is a "long distance relationship" to you and the question itself ("I want to have sex with my friends but I have a GF, what do I do"?)
And the fact that you changed your writing when people asked your age.

Important relationships can either be long and "serious" or short and "passionate". The rest is fun and games and should not be taken too seriously.

On February 17 2012 00:56 Endymion wrote:


it's difficult to not have sex with a lot of girls when you're in a good relationship with someone, it's murphy's law..

On February 17 2012 04:23 iamahydralisk wrote:
Jumping to conclusions is never reasonable because you don't have enough info to make a proper judgment. Just saying.

On February 17 2012 04:37 Xiron wrote:


So you ask for advice, but you don't give enough information to give an appropriate answer, but if someone takes the time and makes conclusions, you just write him off?

On February 15 2012 10:41 Liquid`Drone wrote:
I'm gonna go off on multiple tangents in this post.

I'm a very.. flirtatious guy and consequently, I occasionally end up in the same conundrum. except, it's not actually a conundrum.

basically, if you hang around girls a lot, and you "get" that they like you, it's natural that you also end up liking them. we usually like people who like us (unless they come off as creepy, or unless they're just.. so bad in the first place that them liking you isn't sufficient to make you like them. ) as such, occasionally having thoughts of the nature "gdamn I wish I could penetrate the fucking fuck out of *x*", isn't weird, and you shouldn't hate yourself for having them. Essentially, you can't control what you think.

And while whether you have control over what you do is a wholly other philosophical debate, at least your actions have tangible consequences felt outside the realm of your own consciousness- and you'll be held accountable for them - also by yourself. By this I mean; you probably regard yourself as a good person. (I personally regard myself as awesome. ) What makes you good? Different people have varying definitions - but most will agree that integrity, non-douchebaggy honesty, and caring about other people are all positive traits. The fact that you come to this forum to ask this question, to me implies that you at the very least care about your girlfriend, that you care about preserving your integrity, and considering you haven't told her about the various degrees of crushiness you invariably experience, you're also not being a jerk camouflaged as a honest person. Now comes the crux of this post: Do you feel happy knowing that you are good? For me, the knowledge about my own perception of my own goodness, is like a constant ability to inject happiness into myself; whenever something less than awesome happens, or if I somehow felt like, today, life shafted me, I can just consciously think; well, at least I'm awesome. And then I am happy again.

Be awesome. Don't be a jerk. If you feel like your relationship with your girlfriend is not working out, that you would prefer having sex and developing feelings and creating temporary or lasting bonds with other girls than her, then that's a legitimate point of view. And then, you should break up with her before you pursue any of the other girls; breaking up because a relationship makes you unhappy, does not make you a jerk. Likewise, you can choose to stay with your girlfriend, because you for example feel that your emotional connectivity with her outweights the connectivity you have with any of your flirtees, or because you feel that she is a superior human being, and that while it is unfortunate she lives far away from you, your long-term happiness will be greater due to sacrificing sex with different girls right now to continue staying with her.

You don't meet that many people who love you through your life. For most people, it amounts to a small amount of handfulls. Knowing this, you should be exceptionally wary to hurt the people who love you through betraying them. And, while you can rediscover love through meeting new people, there's one person you'll always be stuck with; Yourself. If you give yourself a reason to doubt your own awesomeness, and cheating on someone you love and who loves you is a legitimate reason to consider yourself less than awesome, it'll be hard to get back that feeling: Once you've fucked yourself over like this, it might be hard to re-convince you that you are great, and you'll consequently be more likely to approach quick, external "fixes" to make yourself happy, rather than being able to consciously conjure the feeling.

Don't go down that road. Don't cheat. Flirt away. Be single if you must. But if you're in a relationship, you're in a relationship, and there's not a single lay in the world worth ruining your self-respect.

On February 17 2012 07:14 Kukaracha wrote:
Our perception of the world is judgmental. The only thing we have control over is wether we voice our opinions and intuitions or not.

We wrote our intuitive opinion based on the little information you gave us, that is all. Maybe you are a teenager and you're pissed by the caricature, maybe you're not, it's not that important to us. You were the one asking questions.