By nature, I'm a very gentle person. I may be competitive in gaming, but I would feel terrible if I ever hurt anyone, or anything. Even if there are ants around, I can't bring myself to smash them, or spray them with cleaner or whatever. It just upsets me. When I was young I couldn't watch animal planet, even though it was my family's obsession for some reason. Tonight I was on my way home from a friend's house. I finished my workout over there, and took a different way home than usual, and the road I took this time is a lot darker than the road I usually take, since it goes through thicker woods. When I was a little over halfway home, a raccoon confidently sprinted directly in front of my car, leaving me no time to react whatsoever. I just kept driving, though. I wanted to stop and check on it, but I knew it could be rabid, and even if were still alive after being hit by my car (which was traveling at about 60 mph), I wouldn't have known what to do with it. All I could do was hope that it died instantly.
I know the natural thought to my encounter is "Well at least it wasn't a dog or a cat." But for me, it's still sad, and it's no consolation that it wasn't a domestic animal. So here I am on a friday night, upset with myself for hitting a living creature.
Don't feel bad about caring. I feel the sameway and could never bring myself to harm anything. Me and my GF even let any bugs that wander inside back out the door unscathed. 60mph accident, odds are it died instantly. Hope the rest of your weekend gets better
Don't ever feel bad for the loss of life. Take some consolidation in the fact the you felt bad at all, some would continue on after what you did without any remorse or sadness.
You need to learn to accept life and nature as it is, and accept that death is the natural conclusion to all life. Lamenting that fact will never change it. You didn't intend to hurt it, so you have nothing to feel sad or guilty about, unless you still haven't accepted reality.
But this whole "I could only hope it died instantly" thing is bullshit. You didn't stop because you think rabies are gonna get you? That's a really cowardly response. Not many animals that just got hit by a car going 60 mph are in the position to lunge at your neck and bite you. If you really want to call yourself a compassionate person, make sure it's dead next time.
On November 19 2011 10:48 TruthIsCold wrote: You need to learn to accept life and nature as it is, and accept that death is the natural conclusion to all life. Lamenting that fact will never change it. You didn't intend to hurt it, so you have nothing to feel sad or guilty about, unless you still haven't accepted reality.
But this whole "I could only hope it died instantly" thing is bullshit. You didn't stop because you think rabies are gonna get you? That's a really cowardly response. Not many animals that just got hit by a car going 60 mph are in the position to lunge at your neck and bite you. If you really want to call yourself a compassionate person, make sure it's dead next time.
I don't understand how going back and making sure it's dead would make me any more of a compassionate person.... What was I supposed to do if it was laying there dying? Run it over again?
On November 19 2011 10:48 TruthIsCold wrote: You need to learn to accept life and nature as it is, and accept that death is the natural conclusion to all life. Lamenting that fact will never change it. You didn't intend to hurt it, so you have nothing to feel sad or guilty about, unless you still haven't accepted reality.
But this whole "I could only hope it died instantly" thing is bullshit. You didn't stop because you think rabies are gonna get you? That's a really cowardly response. Not many animals that just got hit by a car going 60 mph are in the position to lunge at your neck and bite you. If you really want to call yourself a compassionate person, make sure it's dead next time.
I don't understand how going back and making sure it's dead would make me any more of a compassionate person.... What was I supposed to do if it was laying there dying? Run it over again?
You can't figure out a way to quickly kill a dying animal?
And yes, putting something that is suffering out of it's misery is more compassionate than simply telling yourself you don't know what to do and driving away.
So, I'm going to be brutally honest....It's a wild fucking animal...it wasn't even a house pet or anything like that. Hundreds of thousands of animals die daily man, you'll get over it. You did nothing wrong, you weren't speeding, you weren't drunk, you weren't getting a handy from Big Foot while driving. It was an accident, it was a wild animal, it was dumb enough to run in front of your giant vehicle going faster than it's tiny brain can calculate. I just cannot fathom how something like this can 'ruin' someone's day.
One time I ran over a turtle and I was horrified. I love turtles. But then I went back to check on him and he wasn't there. This was only like 30 seconds later, and he was a fucking turtle, so obviously he didn't walk away.
I like to think that when I hit him, I just caught the very edge of his shell, and rather than crushing him, just sorta shot him out from under my tire, speeding him across the road, and ultimately helping him on his way.
On November 19 2011 11:06 turamn wrote: So, I'm going to be brutally honest....It's a wild fucking animal...it wasn't even a house pet or anything like that. Hundreds of thousands of animals die daily man, you'll get over it. You did nothing wrong, you weren't speeding, you weren't drunk, you weren't getting a handy from Big Foot while driving. It was an accident, it was a wild animal, it was dumb enough to run in front of your giant vehicle going faster than it's tiny brain can calculate. I just cannot fathom how something like this can 'ruin' someone's day.
lol yes, that's mostly true...
But you know, many of us in America have grown up in a safe, comfortable bubble for most of our lives. We haven't come to terms with the harsh reality, because we haven't really experienced it much. The more harsh reality people experience, the less distress they will experience when they, say, run over a wild animal. I think my name says it all
On November 19 2011 11:10 MrBitter wrote: One time I ran over a turtle and I was horrified. I love turtles. But then I went back to check on him and he wasn't there. This was only like 30 seconds later, and he was a fucking turtle, so obviously he didn't walk away.
I like to think that when I hit him, I just caught the very edge of his shell, and rather than crushing him, just sorta shot him out from under my tire, speeding him across the road, and ultimately helping him on his way.
On November 19 2011 11:10 MrBitter wrote: One time I ran over a turtle and I was horrified. I love turtles. But then I went back to check on him and he wasn't there. This was only like 30 seconds later, and he was a fucking turtle, so obviously he didn't walk away.
I like to think that when I hit him, I just caught the very edge of his shell, and rather than crushing him, just sorta shot him out from under my tire, speeding him across the road, and ultimately helping him on his way.
Maybe he just jumped into the side of your car?
Fuuu, this is all I can picture now, except with a turtle lol:
On November 19 2011 11:06 turamn wrote: So, I'm going to be brutally honest....It's a wild fucking animal...it wasn't even a house pet or anything like that. Hundreds of thousands of animals die daily man, you'll get over it. You did nothing wrong, you weren't speeding, you weren't drunk, you weren't getting a handy from Big Foot while driving. It was an accident, it was a wild animal, it was dumb enough to run in front of your giant vehicle going faster than it's tiny brain can calculate. I just cannot fathom how something like this can 'ruin' someone's day.
lol yes, that's mostly true...
But you know, many of us in America have grown up in a safe, comfortable bubble for most of our lives. We haven't come to terms with the harsh reality, because we haven't really experienced it much. The more harsh reality people experience, the less distress they will experience when they, say, run over a wild animal. I think my name says it all
It has nothing to do with being in a "safe bubble". Many people feel emotions when having a part in the death of anything. Just because you think its normal for a wild animal to be killed, doesnt mean the person who did it cannot feel remorse for the act. I always look at it this way...Who am I to take the life of something else? Since when is it acceptable to decide when another living organism should end its life? Obviously the OP had not intended to take the life of the raccoon, but he can still feel shitty that it happened. So yes, it CAN ruin someones day.
On November 19 2011 11:06 turamn wrote: So, I'm going to be brutally honest....It's a wild fucking animal...it wasn't even a house pet or anything like that. Hundreds of thousands of animals die daily man, you'll get over it. You did nothing wrong, you weren't speeding, you weren't drunk, you weren't getting a handy from Big Foot while driving. It was an accident, it was a wild animal, it was dumb enough to run in front of your giant vehicle going faster than it's tiny brain can calculate. I just cannot fathom how something like this can 'ruin' someone's day.
lol yes, that's mostly true...
But you know, many of us in America have grown up in a safe, comfortable bubble for most of our lives. We haven't come to terms with the harsh reality, because we haven't really experienced it much. The more harsh reality people experience, the less distress they will experience when they, say, run over a wild animal. I think my name says it all
It has nothing to do with being in a "safe bubble". Many people feel emotions when having a part in the death of anything. Just because you think its normal for a wild animal to be killed, doesnt mean the person who did it cannot feel remorse for the act. I always look at it this way...Who am I to take the life of something else? Since when is it acceptable to decide when another living organism should end its life? Obviously the OP had not intended to take the life of the raccoon, but he can still feel shitty that it happened. So yes, it CAN ruin someones day.
It wasn't the OP's decision. It just happened. It is irrational to get upset over it. Does he get upset over the animals that other people accidentally run over? Upset when he takes a walk and knows he can't really go anywhere outside without risking stepping on and killing insects? Upset when he eats food, which is pretty much 90%+ living organisms?
It absolutely has to do with living in a bubble. Someone who experiences death as a natural daily part of existence will not have their day ruined when a raccoon gets run over. When you don't experience or see much death, when a butcher kills your food for you and puts it in nice little plastic packages in the freezer section, you do not become desensitized to reality.
On November 19 2011 11:06 turamn wrote: So, I'm going to be brutally honest....It's a wild fucking animal...it wasn't even a house pet or anything like that. Hundreds of thousands of animals die daily man, you'll get over it. You did nothing wrong, you weren't speeding, you weren't drunk, you weren't getting a handy from Big Foot while driving. It was an accident, it was a wild animal, it was dumb enough to run in front of your giant vehicle going faster than it's tiny brain can calculate. I just cannot fathom how something like this can 'ruin' someone's day.
lol yes, that's mostly true...
But you know, many of us in America have grown up in a safe, comfortable bubble for most of our lives. We haven't come to terms with the harsh reality, because we haven't really experienced it much. The more harsh reality people experience, the less distress they will experience when they, say, run over a wild animal. I think my name says it all
It has nothing to do with being in a "safe bubble". Many people feel emotions when having a part in the death of anything. Just because you think its normal for a wild animal to be killed, doesnt mean the person who did it cannot feel remorse for the act. I always look at it this way...Who am I to take the life of something else? Since when is it acceptable to decide when another living organism should end its life? Obviously the OP had not intended to take the life of the raccoon, but he can still feel shitty that it happened. So yes, it CAN ruin someones day.
It wasn't the OP's decision. It just happened. It is irrational to get upset over it. Does he get upset over the animals that other people accidentally run over? Upset when he takes a walk and knows he can't really go anywhere outside without risking stepping on and killing insects? Upset when he eats food, which is pretty much 90%+ living organisms?
It absolutely has to do with living in a bubble. Someone who experiences death as a natural daily part of existence will not have their day ruined when a raccoon gets run over. When you don't experience or see much death, when a butcher kills your food for you and puts it in nice little plastic packages in the freezer section, you do not become desensitized to reality.
I don't think apathy over killing a living thing is healthy.... Sorry, but not everybody is as comfortable killing living things as you are.
On November 19 2011 11:06 turamn wrote: So, I'm going to be brutally honest....It's a wild fucking animal...it wasn't even a house pet or anything like that. Hundreds of thousands of animals die daily man, you'll get over it. You did nothing wrong, you weren't speeding, you weren't drunk, you weren't getting a handy from Big Foot while driving. It was an accident, it was a wild animal, it was dumb enough to run in front of your giant vehicle going faster than it's tiny brain can calculate. I just cannot fathom how something like this can 'ruin' someone's day.
lol yes, that's mostly true...
But you know, many of us in America have grown up in a safe, comfortable bubble for most of our lives. We haven't come to terms with the harsh reality, because we haven't really experienced it much. The more harsh reality people experience, the less distress they will experience when they, say, run over a wild animal. I think my name says it all
It has nothing to do with being in a "safe bubble". Many people feel emotions when having a part in the death of anything. Just because you think its normal for a wild animal to be killed, doesnt mean the person who did it cannot feel remorse for the act. I always look at it this way...Who am I to take the life of something else? Since when is it acceptable to decide when another living organism should end its life? Obviously the OP had not intended to take the life of the raccoon, but he can still feel shitty that it happened. So yes, it CAN ruin someones day.
It wasn't the OP's decision. It just happened. It is irrational to get upset over it. Does he get upset over the animals that other people accidentally run over? Upset when he takes a walk and knows he can't really go anywhere outside without risking stepping on and killing insects? Upset when he eats food, which is pretty much 90%+ living organisms?
It absolutely has to do with living in a bubble. Someone who experiences death as a natural daily part of existence will not have their day ruined when a raccoon gets run over. When you don't experience or see much death, when a butcher kills your food for you and puts it in nice little plastic packages in the freezer section, you do not become desensitized to reality.
I don't think its irrational at all to get upset over killing something, whether or not it was an accident. How is that irrational? That doesn't even make sense. Secondly, there is a difference between being uspet over someone else killing something, and you killing something. 1 is much more personal than the other. Lastly, I dont eat meat in nice little packages in the freezer section because like I said, I dont believe in killing animals when I don't have to. It is easily possible to maintain a healthy diet without eating meat, and thats my choice. I am not sensitive to death, it happens to everyone. I am sensitive to personally killing things regardless of how it happened.
ya, i understand how you COULD feel that way, but it's not a rational response given the scenario. i have a funny/ironic/sad? story. i was walking to work one morning and there was a bird that couldnt fly in the middle of the road. it was just sitting there. im like shit - i better try get this bird of the road or it will get hit by a car. cars were only coming semi - frequently, and they would JUST keep missing the bird. And then a cab comes, and I wave my arm to it trying to tell the cab driver to change lanes from a distance. The cab thought i was hailing him down for a ride, and he ran straight over the bird. i was like FUCK i had to turn my head and it made the worst sound. go back to the bird and its like neck is broken and its bleeding out of its eye. im like gross, so i pick up the bird and throw it on the sidewalk and continue with my day.
uncomfortable experience? yes. more ironic than anything. was it my fault? maybe. but i had good intentions... so i don't see any reason to logically feel bad about myself.
you just need better control of your irrational fears so to speak. its like someone being afraid of frogs, or any other phobia for that matter. it's obviously something you've carried over from childhood, but it's something that you can manage.
yeah you might feel BAD, but feeling GUILTY is a different story. its just such a waste of energy. do you eat meat? you know how that animal was killed? do u wear leather? etc etc
animals die. humans are also animals. choose wisely where to express your guilt, coz if you continue feeling shit about trivial things like this forever, THATS whats sad.
On November 19 2011 11:06 turamn wrote: So, I'm going to be brutally honest....It's a wild fucking animal...it wasn't even a house pet or anything like that. Hundreds of thousands of animals die daily man, you'll get over it. You did nothing wrong, you weren't speeding, you weren't drunk, you weren't getting a handy from Big Foot while driving. It was an accident, it was a wild animal, it was dumb enough to run in front of your giant vehicle going faster than it's tiny brain can calculate. I just cannot fathom how something like this can 'ruin' someone's day.
lol yes, that's mostly true...
But you know, many of us in America have grown up in a safe, comfortable bubble for most of our lives. We haven't come to terms with the harsh reality, because we haven't really experienced it much. The more harsh reality people experience, the less distress they will experience when they, say, run over a wild animal. I think my name says it all
It has nothing to do with being in a "safe bubble". Many people feel emotions when having a part in the death of anything. Just because you think its normal for a wild animal to be killed, doesnt mean the person who did it cannot feel remorse for the act. I always look at it this way...Who am I to take the life of something else? Since when is it acceptable to decide when another living organism should end its life? Obviously the OP had not intended to take the life of the raccoon, but he can still feel shitty that it happened. So yes, it CAN ruin someones day.
It wasn't the OP's decision. It just happened. It is irrational to get upset over it. Does he get upset over the animals that other people accidentally run over? Upset when he takes a walk and knows he can't really go anywhere outside without risking stepping on and killing insects? Upset when he eats food, which is pretty much 90%+ living organisms?
It absolutely has to do with living in a bubble. Someone who experiences death as a natural daily part of existence will not have their day ruined when a raccoon gets run over. When you don't experience or see much death, when a butcher kills your food for you and puts it in nice little plastic packages in the freezer section, you do not become desensitized to reality.
I don't think its irrational at all to get upset over killing something, whether or not it was an accident. How is that irrational? That doesn't even make sense. Secondly, there is a difference between being uspet over someone else killing something, and you killing something. 1 is much more personal than the other. Lastly, I dont eat meat in nice little packages in the freezer section because like I said, I dont believe in killing animals when I don't have to. It is easily possible to maintain a healthy diet without eating meat, and thats my choice. I am not sensitive to death, it happens to everyone. I am sensitive to personally killing things regardless of how it happened.
being upset is one thing, and feeling guilty is another. there is nothing irrational about feeling upset about the loss of life. however, dwelling on it, and finding yourself responsible when it clearly was not, IS irrational, and detrimental to your well being. it is clearly evident that the OP has an irrational response to the loss of life.
I try to avoid killing things, but I'm not quite so dedicated as you OP. There are just some insects that I can't stand and will get the shoe or bug spray if around me. On the other hand, I saw a big turtle trying to cross the freeway the other day and felt bad he probably wouldn't make it. Nothing you can do though, even if you risk your life trying to get them out of the road they'll probably just turn right around and do it again.
I also hit a cat about 6 months ago. That sucked, too.
Also, while it's easy to tell someone they shouldn't feel a certain way, you really shouldn't feel upset with yourself. There's nothing you can do in a situation like that. It's just a sad unavoidable accident.
On November 19 2011 11:06 turamn wrote: So, I'm going to be brutally honest....It's a wild fucking animal...it wasn't even a house pet or anything like that. Hundreds of thousands of animals die daily man, you'll get over it. You did nothing wrong, you weren't speeding, you weren't drunk, you weren't getting a handy from Big Foot while driving. It was an accident, it was a wild animal, it was dumb enough to run in front of your giant vehicle going faster than it's tiny brain can calculate. I just cannot fathom how something like this can 'ruin' someone's day.
lol yes, that's mostly true...
But you know, many of us in America have grown up in a safe, comfortable bubble for most of our lives. We haven't come to terms with the harsh reality, because we haven't really experienced it much. The more harsh reality people experience, the less distress they will experience when they, say, run over a wild animal. I think my name says it all
It has nothing to do with being in a "safe bubble". Many people feel emotions when having a part in the death of anything. Just because you think its normal for a wild animal to be killed, doesnt mean the person who did it cannot feel remorse for the act. I always look at it this way...Who am I to take the life of something else? Since when is it acceptable to decide when another living organism should end its life? Obviously the OP had not intended to take the life of the raccoon, but he can still feel shitty that it happened. So yes, it CAN ruin someones day.
It wasn't the OP's decision. It just happened. It is irrational to get upset over it. Does he get upset over the animals that other people accidentally run over? Upset when he takes a walk and knows he can't really go anywhere outside without risking stepping on and killing insects? Upset when he eats food, which is pretty much 90%+ living organisms?
It absolutely has to do with living in a bubble. Someone who experiences death as a natural daily part of existence will not have their day ruined when a raccoon gets run over. When you don't experience or see much death, when a butcher kills your food for you and puts it in nice little plastic packages in the freezer section, you do not become desensitized to reality.
I don't think its irrational at all to get upset over killing something, whether or not it was an accident. How is that irrational? That doesn't even make sense. Secondly, there is a difference between being uspet over someone else killing something, and you killing something. 1 is much more personal than the other. Lastly, I dont eat meat in nice little packages in the freezer section because like I said, I dont believe in killing animals when I don't have to. It is easily possible to maintain a healthy diet without eating meat, and thats my choice. I am not sensitive to death, it happens to everyone. I am sensitive to personally killing things regardless of how it happened.
being upset is one thing, and feeling guilty is another. there is nothing irrational about feeling upset about the loss of life. however, dwelling on it, and finding yourself responsible when it clearly was not, IS irrational, and detrimental to your well being. it is clearly evident that the OP has an irrational response to the loss of life.
It's normal for a human being to feel guilt after killing an animal. Maybe he feels if he was more careful he could have dodged the raccoon. Shit happens in life. Hitting that raccoon was no more his fault in running over it than it was the raccoon's fault for venturing onto the road; animals aren't smart enough to recognize asphalt as a terrain hazard.
I don't see how "rationality" factors into his emotions at all. It's not extremely aberrant behavior like he hit a tree and feels bad about it, he hit an animal. Additionally, you're not exactly consoling him by discussing the philosophical ramifications of guilt and whether or not it's rational to apply it to the situation at hand.
On November 19 2011 11:06 turamn wrote: So, I'm going to be brutally honest....It's a wild fucking animal...it wasn't even a house pet or anything like that. Hundreds of thousands of animals die daily man, you'll get over it. You did nothing wrong, you weren't speeding, you weren't drunk, you weren't getting a handy from Big Foot while driving. It was an accident, it was a wild animal, it was dumb enough to run in front of your giant vehicle going faster than it's tiny brain can calculate. I just cannot fathom how something like this can 'ruin' someone's day.
lol yes, that's mostly true...
But you know, many of us in America have grown up in a safe, comfortable bubble for most of our lives. We haven't come to terms with the harsh reality, because we haven't really experienced it much. The more harsh reality people experience, the less distress they will experience when they, say, run over a wild animal. I think my name says it all
It has nothing to do with being in a "safe bubble". Many people feel emotions when having a part in the death of anything. Just because you think its normal for a wild animal to be killed, doesnt mean the person who did it cannot feel remorse for the act. I always look at it this way...Who am I to take the life of something else? Since when is it acceptable to decide when another living organism should end its life? Obviously the OP had not intended to take the life of the raccoon, but he can still feel shitty that it happened. So yes, it CAN ruin someones day.
It wasn't the OP's decision. It just happened. It is irrational to get upset over it. Does he get upset over the animals that other people accidentally run over? Upset when he takes a walk and knows he can't really go anywhere outside without risking stepping on and killing insects? Upset when he eats food, which is pretty much 90%+ living organisms?
It absolutely has to do with living in a bubble. Someone who experiences death as a natural daily part of existence will not have their day ruined when a raccoon gets run over. When you don't experience or see much death, when a butcher kills your food for you and puts it in nice little plastic packages in the freezer section, you do not become desensitized to reality.
I don't think its irrational at all to get upset over killing something, whether or not it was an accident. How is that irrational? That doesn't even make sense. Secondly, there is a difference between being uspet over someone else killing something, and you killing something. 1 is much more personal than the other. Lastly, I dont eat meat in nice little packages in the freezer section because like I said, I dont believe in killing animals when I don't have to. It is easily possible to maintain a healthy diet without eating meat, and thats my choice. I am not sensitive to death, it happens to everyone. I am sensitive to personally killing things regardless of how it happened.
being upset is one thing, and feeling guilty is another. there is nothing irrational about feeling upset about the loss of life. however, dwelling on it, and finding yourself responsible when it clearly was not, IS irrational, and detrimental to your well being. it is clearly evident that the OP has an irrational response to the loss of life.
It's normal for a human being to feel guilt after killing an animal. Maybe he feels if he was more careful he could have dodged the raccoon. Shit happens in life. Hitting that raccoon was no more his fault in running over it than it was the raccoon's fault for venturing onto the road; animals aren't smart enough to recognize asphalt as a terrain hazard.
I don't see how "rationality" factors into his emotions at all. It's not extremely aberrant behavior like he hit a tree and feels bad about it, he hit an animal. Additionally, you're not exactly consoling him by discussing the philosophical ramifications of guilt and whether or not it's rational to apply it to the situation at hand.
You're right. The speed limit was 50 mph, and I was driving 60mph because there were no other cars on the road. Had I been only going the speed limit, I would've had extra time to react, and may not have hit the raccoon. I honestly don't believe I'm being irrational. Putting on leather shoes isn't the same as you personally running over a cow with your car.
On November 19 2011 11:06 turamn wrote: So, I'm going to be brutally honest....It's a wild fucking animal...it wasn't even a house pet or anything like that. Hundreds of thousands of animals die daily man, you'll get over it. You did nothing wrong, you weren't speeding, you weren't drunk, you weren't getting a handy from Big Foot while driving. It was an accident, it was a wild animal, it was dumb enough to run in front of your giant vehicle going faster than it's tiny brain can calculate. I just cannot fathom how something like this can 'ruin' someone's day.
lol yes, that's mostly true...
But you know, many of us in America have grown up in a safe, comfortable bubble for most of our lives. We haven't come to terms with the harsh reality, because we haven't really experienced it much. The more harsh reality people experience, the less distress they will experience when they, say, run over a wild animal. I think my name says it all
It has nothing to do with being in a "safe bubble". Many people feel emotions when having a part in the death of anything. Just because you think its normal for a wild animal to be killed, doesnt mean the person who did it cannot feel remorse for the act. I always look at it this way...Who am I to take the life of something else? Since when is it acceptable to decide when another living organism should end its life? Obviously the OP had not intended to take the life of the raccoon, but he can still feel shitty that it happened. So yes, it CAN ruin someones day.
It wasn't the OP's decision. It just happened. It is irrational to get upset over it. Does he get upset over the animals that other people accidentally run over? Upset when he takes a walk and knows he can't really go anywhere outside without risking stepping on and killing insects? Upset when he eats food, which is pretty much 90%+ living organisms?
It absolutely has to do with living in a bubble. Someone who experiences death as a natural daily part of existence will not have their day ruined when a raccoon gets run over. When you don't experience or see much death, when a butcher kills your food for you and puts it in nice little plastic packages in the freezer section, you do not become desensitized to reality.
I don't think its irrational at all to get upset over killing something, whether or not it was an accident. How is that irrational? That doesn't even make sense. Secondly, there is a difference between being uspet over someone else killing something, and you killing something. 1 is much more personal than the other. Lastly, I dont eat meat in nice little packages in the freezer section because like I said, I dont believe in killing animals when I don't have to. It is easily possible to maintain a healthy diet without eating meat, and thats my choice. I am not sensitive to death, it happens to everyone. I am sensitive to personally killing things regardless of how it happened.
being upset is one thing, and feeling guilty is another. there is nothing irrational about feeling upset about the loss of life. however, dwelling on it, and finding yourself responsible when it clearly was not, IS irrational, and detrimental to your well being. it is clearly evident that the OP has an irrational response to the loss of life.
It's normal for a human being to feel guilt after killing an animal. Maybe he feels if he was more careful he could have dodged the raccoon. Shit happens in life. Hitting that raccoon was no more his fault in running over it than it was the raccoon's fault for venturing onto the road; animals aren't smart enough to recognize asphalt as a terrain hazard.
I don't see how "rationality" factors into his emotions at all. It's not extremely aberrant behavior like he hit a tree and feels bad about it, he hit an animal. Additionally, you're not exactly consoling him by discussing the philosophical ramifications of guilt and whether or not it's rational to apply it to the situation at hand.
What i'm trying to get at, is that thoughts and emotions are closely linked. depression is the biggest example of this, bad thinking habits creating unwarranted emotions for whatever reason. given any situation, while emotional responses are entirely subjective, there needs to be a level of 'rationality' (i don't know what word to use) behind these emotions. too rational and you are cold, and too emotional you are.. just incapable of making good decisions. So in life, we attempt to balance our emotions and the rationality behind them.
My intentions here are not to console him, for that would only condone this response in similar future events. If you want to live life crying over stepping on an ant, then so be it. But this is no different to a boy who hates himself for failing an exam even though he tried his hardest, or a bulimic girl who never feels pretty enough for her partner (albeit on a much smaller scale)
There is something for the op to learn from here, and saying 'hey it's completely normal for you to feel this way' only justifies the way he feels, reinforcing that in his mind, its 'rational'.
On November 19 2011 11:06 turamn wrote: So, I'm going to be brutally honest....It's a wild fucking animal...it wasn't even a house pet or anything like that. Hundreds of thousands of animals die daily man, you'll get over it. You did nothing wrong, you weren't speeding, you weren't drunk, you weren't getting a handy from Big Foot while driving. It was an accident, it was a wild animal, it was dumb enough to run in front of your giant vehicle going faster than it's tiny brain can calculate. I just cannot fathom how something like this can 'ruin' someone's day.
lol yes, that's mostly true...
But you know, many of us in America have grown up in a safe, comfortable bubble for most of our lives. We haven't come to terms with the harsh reality, because we haven't really experienced it much. The more harsh reality people experience, the less distress they will experience when they, say, run over a wild animal. I think my name says it all
It has nothing to do with being in a "safe bubble". Many people feel emotions when having a part in the death of anything. Just because you think its normal for a wild animal to be killed, doesnt mean the person who did it cannot feel remorse for the act. I always look at it this way...Who am I to take the life of something else? Since when is it acceptable to decide when another living organism should end its life? Obviously the OP had not intended to take the life of the raccoon, but he can still feel shitty that it happened. So yes, it CAN ruin someones day.
It wasn't the OP's decision. It just happened. It is irrational to get upset over it. Does he get upset over the animals that other people accidentally run over? Upset when he takes a walk and knows he can't really go anywhere outside without risking stepping on and killing insects? Upset when he eats food, which is pretty much 90%+ living organisms?
It absolutely has to do with living in a bubble. Someone who experiences death as a natural daily part of existence will not have their day ruined when a raccoon gets run over. When you don't experience or see much death, when a butcher kills your food for you and puts it in nice little plastic packages in the freezer section, you do not become desensitized to reality.
I don't think its irrational at all to get upset over killing something, whether or not it was an accident. How is that irrational? That doesn't even make sense. Secondly, there is a difference between being uspet over someone else killing something, and you killing something. 1 is much more personal than the other. Lastly, I dont eat meat in nice little packages in the freezer section because like I said, I dont believe in killing animals when I don't have to. It is easily possible to maintain a healthy diet without eating meat, and thats my choice. I am not sensitive to death, it happens to everyone. I am sensitive to personally killing things regardless of how it happened.
being upset is one thing, and feeling guilty is another. there is nothing irrational about feeling upset about the loss of life. however, dwelling on it, and finding yourself responsible when it clearly was not, IS irrational, and detrimental to your well being. it is clearly evident that the OP has an irrational response to the loss of life.
It's normal for a human being to feel guilt after killing an animal. Maybe he feels if he was more careful he could have dodged the raccoon. Shit happens in life. Hitting that raccoon was no more his fault in running over it than it was the raccoon's fault for venturing onto the road; animals aren't smart enough to recognize asphalt as a terrain hazard.
I don't see how "rationality" factors into his emotions at all. It's not extremely aberrant behavior like he hit a tree and feels bad about it, he hit an animal. Additionally, you're not exactly consoling him by discussing the philosophical ramifications of guilt and whether or not it's rational to apply it to the situation at hand.
You're right. The speed limit was 50 mph, and I was driving 60mph because there were no other cars on the road. Had I been only going the speed limit, I would've had extra time to react, and may not have hit the raccoon. I honestly don't believe I'm being irrational. Putting on leather shoes isn't the same as you personally running over a cow with your car.
The money you spend on leather, goes to the leather industry, whose output depends on demand, in which case if no one wore leather, they would not kill any cows to make it. So technically, every person who wears leather, has killed a part of that cow, the same goes with eating meat/poultry, pollution/global warming, etc etc
When the black snake flashed onto the morning road, and the truck could not swerve-- death, that is how it happens.
Now he lies looped and useless as an old bicycle tire. I stop the car and carry him into the bushes.
He is as cool and gleaming as a braided whip, he is as beautiful and quiet as a dead brother. I leave him under the leaves
and drive on, thinking about death: its suddenness, its terrible weight, its certain coming. Yet under
reason burns a brighter fire, which the bones have always preferred. It is the story of endless good fortune. It says to oblivion: not me!
It is the light at the center of every cell. It is what sent the snake coiling and flowing forward happily all spring through the green leaves before he came to the road.
On November 20 2011 01:43 err wrote: When the black snake flashed onto the morning road, and the truck could not swerve-- death, that is how it happens.
Now he lies looped and useless as an old bicycle tire. I stop the car and carry him into the bushes.
He is as cool and gleaming as a braided whip, he is as beautiful and quiet as a dead brother. I leave him under the leaves
and drive on, thinking about death: its suddenness, its terrible weight, its certain coming. Yet under
reason burns a brighter fire, which the bones have always preferred. It is the story of endless good fortune. It says to oblivion: not me!
It is the light at the center of every cell. It is what sent the snake coiling and flowing forward happily all spring through the green leaves before he came to the road.
~ Mary Oliver ~
That poem is really applicable to this situation. Thanks for posting it.
EPT
