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Student Answers Greatest Hits

Blogs > micronesia
Post a Reply
1 2 3 4 5 9 10 11 Next All
micronesia
Profile Blog Joined July 2006
United States24701 Posts
Last Edited: 2011-09-23 02:10:31
September 23 2011 02:09 GMT
#1
I'm going to share some questions and real answers 16-17 year old students gave in the past day in a class studying marine science:

1:
Q) Who was the first person to discover North America by boat?
A) Titanic

2:
Q) In what year did this discovery occur? 2050bc, 1002ad, 1492ad, or 1992ad
A) 1992ad

3:
Q) In what year did Columbus sail to North America? 2050bc, 2002ad, 1492ad, 1992ad
A) 2050bc

4:
Q) What two theories is Charles Darwin famous for?
A) pressure

5:
Q) What did Benjamin Franklin accomplish to advance oceanography?
A) Became President of the USA

6:
Q) What was his motivation for doing this?
A) Greedy

7:
Q) How did the Jason, an underwater robot, assist in the photographing of the sunken Titanic?
A) It can go underwater.

Bonus: real answer from a physics quiz also:

Q) A students walks with a speed of 2 m/s for 5 s. How far did she walk?
A) v=d/t = 5/2 = 2.5m/s

Bonus #2: real answer from a nutrition quiz:

Q) True or False: You should eat a lot of food shortly before going to bed.
A) True

And this isn't even an exhaustive list of all ridiculous written answers from the past 24 hours! (never mind ridiculous spoken things) These are just some that I remembered from grading earlier...

There is no such thing as an easy question for somemany students. Every question is a challenge that they very well might get wrong :/

Is it something in the water D:

PS I heard a couple of stories the past couple of years about a 9th grader being unable to tell time on an analogue clock

Honestly I could go on and on but this is just too depressing. No wonder teachers are often heavy drinkers.

edit: probably wasn't clear, but the title of this OP is joking since this is just from today and not even a greatest hits list

****
ModeratorThere are animal crackers for people and there are people crackers for animals.
intotheheart
Profile Blog Joined January 2011
Canada33091 Posts
September 23 2011 02:13 GMT
#2
I hope you're kidding. I definitely hope you're kidding.
kiss kiss fall in love
Crais
Profile Blog Joined March 2010
Canada2136 Posts
September 23 2011 02:13 GMT
#3
Wow those are funny yet sad.
RIP MBC Game Hero
King K. Rool
Profile Blog Joined May 2009
Canada4408 Posts
September 23 2011 02:16 GMT
#4
v=d/t = 5/2

HAHAHAHAHAHA
micronesia
Profile Blog Joined July 2006
United States24701 Posts
Last Edited: 2011-09-23 02:17:28
September 23 2011 02:16 GMT
#5
On September 23 2011 11:13 IntoTheheart wrote:
I hope you're kidding. I definitely hope you're kidding.

I am not kidding and that was only the tip of the iceberg.

...which not everyone correctly identified as the thing the Titanic struck before it sunk...
ModeratorThere are animal crackers for people and there are people crackers for animals.
GenesisX
Profile Blog Joined February 2010
Canada4267 Posts
September 23 2011 02:19 GMT
#6
I feel ashamed of being 16 now.
133 221 333 123 111
wherebugsgo
Profile Blog Joined February 2010
Japan10647 Posts
September 23 2011 02:21 GMT
#7
rofl given velocity, finds velocity...completely wrong.

LOL

also I know a couple people who straight up can't read an analog clock. idfk why or how, but they can't.

Pretty sad.
intotheheart
Profile Blog Joined January 2011
Canada33091 Posts
Last Edited: 2011-09-23 02:23:10
September 23 2011 02:21 GMT
#8
On September 23 2011 11:16 micronesia wrote:
Show nested quote +
On September 23 2011 11:13 IntoTheheart wrote:
I hope you're kidding. I definitely hope you're kidding.

I am not kidding and that was only the tip of the iceberg.

...which not everyone correctly identified as the thing the Titanic struck before it sunk...

Can I cry on you..? Man this is depressing.

Edit: Nice touch at the end.
kiss kiss fall in love
XXGeneration
Profile Blog Joined November 2010
United States625 Posts
September 23 2011 02:22 GMT
#9
On September 23 2011 11:16 micronesia wrote:
Show nested quote +
On September 23 2011 11:13 IntoTheheart wrote:
I hope you're kidding. I definitely hope you're kidding.

I am not kidding and that was only the tip of the iceberg.

...which not everyone correctly identified as the thing the Titanic struck before it sunk...


this is both a win and fail at the same time.
"I was so surprised when I first played StarCraft 2. I couldn't believe that such an easy game exists... I guess the best way to attract people these days is to make things easy and simple." -Midas
Jonoman92
Profile Blog Joined September 2006
United States9104 Posts
September 23 2011 02:27 GMT
#10
lol

Q) True or False: You should eat a lot of food shortly before going to bed.
A) True


Don't like that question though. It's personal preference imo.
Alejandrisha
Profile Blog Joined July 2010
United States6565 Posts
September 23 2011 02:27 GMT
#11
inb4 "only in america"

Well, that is pretty sad I'd like to see some percentages though.. if you just leave it like that it seems like it could be pretty misleading.. maybe 1/1000 picked the answers above and they didn't take it seriously and were just trolling the teach?
get rich or die mining
TL+ Member
micronesia
Profile Blog Joined July 2006
United States24701 Posts
Last Edited: 2011-09-23 02:30:01
September 23 2011 02:28 GMT
#12
On September 23 2011 11:27 Jonoman92 wrote:
lol
Show nested quote +

Q) True or False: You should eat a lot of food shortly before going to bed.
A) True


Don't like that question though. It's personal preference imo.

Yeah it's not a fully objective fact (pretty much agreed upon by everyone in the medical field though)... but the official stance of the previous day's lesson included a clear message that that is specifically false for the purposes of the assessment.... so it's not like they had an excuse for the wrong answer XD


On September 23 2011 11:27 Alejandrisha wrote:
inb4 "only in america"

Well, that is pretty sad I'd like to see some percentages though.. if you just leave it like that it seems like it could be pretty misleading.. maybe 1/1000 picked the answers above and they didn't take it seriously and were just trolling the teach?

I'm not going to give statistics but you can take my word for it: when you teach certain classes (the ones that tend to have the lower performing students) the statistics are pretty horrifying. Remember.... these are all just SOME answers I saw TODAY. And I don't have 1000 students...
ModeratorThere are animal crackers for people and there are people crackers for animals.
Bubelzeeb
Profile Joined September 2011
8 Posts
September 23 2011 02:29 GMT
#13
Q) What did Benjamin Franklin accomplish to advance oceanography?
A) Became President of the USA

Call me stupid...

Ok now that that is done, what is real answer? Not part of my general knowledge and google would be cheating.
Probulous is awesome...
micronesia
Profile Blog Joined July 2006
United States24701 Posts
September 23 2011 02:31 GMT
#14
On September 23 2011 11:29 Bubelzeeb wrote:
Show nested quote +
Q) What did Benjamin Franklin accomplish to advance oceanography?
A) Became President of the USA

Call me stupid...

Ok now that that is done, what is real answer? Not part of my general knowledge and google would be cheating.

He mapped the gulf stream in order to assist in planning a faster route to sail to Europe.
ModeratorThere are animal crackers for people and there are people crackers for animals.
Alejandrisha
Profile Blog Joined July 2010
United States6565 Posts
September 23 2011 02:31 GMT
#15
On September 23 2011 11:28 micronesia wrote:
Show nested quote +
On September 23 2011 11:27 Jonoman92 wrote:
lol

Q) True or False: You should eat a lot of food shortly before going to bed.
A) True


Don't like that question though. It's personal preference imo.

Yeah it's not a fully objective fact (pretty much agreed upon by everyone in the medical field though)... but the official stance of the previous day's lesson included a clear message that that is specifically false for the purposes of the assessment.... so it's not like they had an excuse for the wrong answer XD


Show nested quote +
On September 23 2011 11:27 Alejandrisha wrote:
inb4 "only in america"

Well, that is pretty sad I'd like to see some percentages though.. if you just leave it like that it seems like it could be pretty misleading.. maybe 1/1000 picked the answers above and they didn't take it seriously and were just trolling the teach?

I'm not going to give statistics but you can take my word for it: when you teach certain classes (the ones that tend to have the lower performing students) the statistics are pretty horrifying. Remember.... these are all just SOME answers I saw TODAY. And I don't have 1000 students...


Ohhh I didn't know you were a teacher!

That is pretty neat then
get rich or die mining
TL+ Member
Kid-Fox
Profile Blog Joined July 2010
Canada400 Posts
September 23 2011 02:34 GMT
#16
As a student in an academic high school I feel like crying while reading these. Don't they know about the "1492 columbus sailed the ocean blue" rhyme? basic algebra to find distance with v = d/t? Darwin discovered pressure? HUH??????

may I ask what grade level you teach?
micronesia
Profile Blog Joined July 2006
United States24701 Posts
Last Edited: 2011-09-23 02:39:01
September 23 2011 02:38 GMT
#17
On September 23 2011 11:34 Kid-Fox wrote:
As a student in an academic high school I feel like crying while reading these. Don't they know about the "1492 columbus sailed the ocean blue" rhyme? basic algebra to find distance with v = d/t? Darwin discovered pressure? HUH??????

may I ask what grade level you teach?

These are 16-17 year olds (as I mentioned) so they are in 11th-12th grade.

Yeah when I think back to my high school experience I can't imagine not knowing 1492. To be fair, the physics problem wasn't just basic algebra.... it was substitution. You'd think people would all know that Darwin=evolution due to all the controversy, but they don't pay attention to the outside world. You could be explaining to many of these students how their house is going to explode tonight and they still would barely be paying attention.

It's not as easy for me to give hilarious/sad examples, but some students have a lot of trouble with reading and basic reasoning skills, even after all these years in school.
ModeratorThere are animal crackers for people and there are people crackers for animals.
redoxx
Profile Blog Joined October 2010
United States333 Posts
September 23 2011 02:40 GMT
#18
I apologize for my fellow 17 year olds. Very very sad...
The horror...the horror
hypercube
Profile Joined April 2010
Hungary2735 Posts
September 23 2011 02:40 GMT
#19
Some of these are bad but not knowing how to read analogue clocks is really not a big deal. It's an obscure historical curiousity, you really can't fault kids for not knowing about it

Also anything except 1-4 is speciallized knowledge. If they didn't study or pay attention in class of course they're not going to know it.
"Sending people in rockets to other planets is a waste of money better spent on sending rockets into people on this planet."
Bubelzeeb
Profile Joined September 2011
8 Posts
September 23 2011 02:41 GMT
#20
On September 23 2011 11:31 micronesia wrote:
Show nested quote +
On September 23 2011 11:29 Bubelzeeb wrote:
Q) What did Benjamin Franklin accomplish to advance oceanography?
A) Became President of the USA

Call me stupid...

Ok now that that is done, what is real answer? Not part of my general knowledge and google would be cheating.

He mapped the gulf stream in order to assist in planning a faster route to sail to Europe.


Cheers!

What a champ. Given the intelligence of yesteryear's leaders compared to today's, it is perhaps not surprising the kids aren't so smart.

Which came first?

A) Woeful politicians
B) Woeful Kids
Probulous is awesome...
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