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I give up. Completely. Demoted down to rank 50 in silver; I'll be bronze before long. I haven't had a win since...well since as long as I can remember. My initial placement was gold. I can't even vent about the terrans here because certain people keep harassing me about it. They know who they are.
So I give up. No more. It was a dumb dream to begin with. As if Dignitas would ever accept someone like me. I'll just live out my NEET life with my parents and eventually drop dead of some weird complication stemming from one of my many conditions. I'm done. I thought I had some shred of talent - I didn't. Feh. No dreams of mine come true; why did I think this one could. Man I can't do ANYTHING right. No trust me it's true. If you know me, you know, I can't do A-NY-THING correctly.
And don't tell me anything about lessons. ONE lesson with the amazing Incontrol, as godly as he is, is not going to change anything - I'm a KID, I can't afford his rates forever.
Dream shattered. This was my last resort seeing as with the...well, way I am, I can't get a proper job. I'll be under the bed. Hiding. With the cats. You can come talk to me if you want, but only if you bring food...I am very, very hungry.
Currently listening to: "Bad Apple!!"
You all know where that song's from...
...This blog had better not be labeled too short!!!
EDIT: Apparently...none of you get it. -smacks forehead on wall- How to make myself understood...that is the number one priority here.
  
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Its just a game. Dont be silly. I am sure you are a good guy in RL. 
For example i am stuck in bronze since decades...but hey doesnt matter. You play the game for fun and not for money.
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you have to understand those progamers your looking at have years and years of experience and you cannot expect to all of a sudden become a pro
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If it makes you feel better, ranks Bronze-Gold are separated by pure mechanics and fundamentals. Lessons aren't worth your time if you just focus on practicing your pure fundamentals. Don't worry about win rate or rank. Place a greater emphasis on smoothly controlling your micro and macro, and less on strategy. 95% of your games you probably lost due to mechanics or being out macro'd in some way.
Also watch Day[9].
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Anyone who gives up as easily as you will never make it.
You're playing the game for the wrong reasons.
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If you can beat Touhou on Lunatic you can play starcraft
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Only losers give up, you sucker.
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On September 13 2011 03:28 OmiDeLta wrote:
...No dreams of mine come true; why did I think this one could. Man I can't do ANYTHING right. No trust me it's true. If you know me, you know, I can't do A-NY-THING correctly...
This, among some other things you mentioned reminded me of myself. Giving up, stopping following something you wish to do. It's difficult to face struggles, especially if you feel that you have been a failure all this time. Asking yourself to do too much to 'catch up' to these past failures, it's only going to hurt you. Trust me, I've been there, heck I still struggle with this mindset, feel like giving up on my dreams. But, the best thing what you can do is, to keep fighting for what is important for you.
It's vicious cycle. You give up, and then you'll be regretting it deep down. It'll happen again and again. So, if this is truly important for you, just bite your lips, hell even cry when things go poorly to let the negative feelings out, but don't stop trying and fighting. Some people may be discouraging you from your goal, but in the end, if it's really important for you, hell fight for it.
Good luck.
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On September 13 2011 03:46 Blasterion wrote:
If you can beat Touhou on Lunatic you can play starcraft
if you can beat touhou on lunatic you can be an arbitrage trader
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On September 13 2011 03:57 Caller wrote:Show nested quote +On September 13 2011 03:46 Blasterion wrote:
If you can beat Touhou on Lunatic you can play starcraft if you can beat touhou on lunatic you can be an arbitrage trader
Depends on which one, Imperishable Night was easy
On September 13 2011 03:28 OmiDeLta wrote:
I give up. Completely. Demoted down to rank 50 in silver; I'll be bronze before long. I haven't had a win since...well since as long as I can remember. My initial placement was gold. I can't even vent about the terrans here because certain people keep harassing me about it. They know who they are.
So I give up. No more. It was a dumb dream to begin with. As if Dignitas would ever accept someone like me. I'll just live out my NEET life with my parents and eventually drop dead of some weird complication stemming from one of my many conditions. I'm done. I thought I had some shred of talent - I didn't. Feh. No dreams of mine come true; why did I think this one could. Man I can't do ANYTHING right. No trust me it's true. If you know me, you know, I can't do A-NY-THING correctly.
And don't tell me anything about lessons. ONE lesson with the amazing Incontrol, as godly as he is, is not going to change anything - I'm a KID, I can't afford his rates forever.
Dream shattered. This was my last resort seeing as with the...well, way I am, I can't get a proper job. I'll be under the bed. Hiding. With the cats. You can come talk to me if you want, but only if you bring food...I am very, very hungry.
Currently listening to: "Bad Apple!!"
You all know where that song's from...
...This blog had better not be labeled too short!!!
Aren't you just making excuses for yourself? Do you really want to live it down as a NEET? I won't lie, you sound pathetic, almost to a Shinji Ikari level.
Saying that dreams don't come true? You're not chasing your dreams, how can they come true.
If you truly believe dreams are just dreams, you should save them for when you are sleeping.
At this point, ask yourself. Do you want it? If you want something you'll work hard. You will ladder, and at some point you will win. People with over 400 games do not stay silver.
People who chase after their dreams get closer to it, not further. Dignitas will accept you if you are good. You will become good if you practice. You will practice if you have the desire.
So tell me, in the end what do you want?
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On September 13 2011 03:46 Blasterion wrote:
If you can beat 1cc Touhou on Lunatic you can play starcraft
Fixed. Even i can beat lunatic with continues :\
Also idk what you are talking about 8 is hard as shit
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If he could beat Touhou on Lunatic I'm not sure he'd be claiming he completely lacks talent.
IN is only easy on the non-Lunatic modes.
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Good, coz you have more time to focus on real life
No point to playing if it's not enjoyable
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What might help you is to try to start from the bottom over and work your way up.
Either get a new account and throw the placement matches or intentionally lose 100 games in a row until you are at the rock bottom of the MMR, then start over with playing seriously.
Also, your head has a huge influence over how you play. On some days where my depression really kicks in, i can't even beat players a league below me, on others where i'm in a (relatively) good mood, i go on a winning streak. If i ever get on meds against depression, i'll probably tear it up in masters league :p
Don't play on days where you feel down, it will only make your mood even worse. Play other, more relaxed games then, like League of Legends, Team Fortress 2 or such.
Play only when you are in a good mental and physical (no headaches or such and eaten enough to not be hungry) state. And don't go into games expecting to win, just to have fun.
Also a new Desktop Background for you:
+ Show Spoiler +
OmiDeLta FIGHTING!
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Try playing another game. Something like an FPS, or just something that isn't an RTS at all. Lately, I've been playing Red Orchestra 2(Beta), and all my Starcraft annoyances drift away. Dying horribly many times can relieve stress.
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This blog was kinda miserable. Pro-gaming isn't for everyone. Some of these guys will play for 6-8 hours in a sitting. Is this the kind of approach you are taking? What exactly is going so wrong for you? You can play a million matches but it probably won't help you on your path to pro-gamer if you don't analyze your games, define your faults, learn timings, etc.
Perseverance is key. Failing that, find a new hobby that doesn't bum you out so much
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It doesn't sound like you really enjoy playing anyhow. It's like being a bad relationship. You're constantly abused and hurt, but you keep coming back for more, because you tell yourself that it's all you have left.
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I can get anyone to diamond in 2 weeks if they put in the work.
Ok, maybe not someone with mental issues, but you sound like a fairly reasonable guy.
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You can't just make yourself go Pro, if you truly don't enjoy playing the game (You obviously don't) then you have no business or place trying to pursue it as a career.
It's so annoying now a days how no one can seem to just enjoy the game and have fun with it, too many people get frustrated with being stuck in low leagues or not going from Bronze to masters in a year its sad.
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if playing starcraft gets you this depressed, you should probably quit anyway.
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Hey man maybe you should just whine more and feel more sorry for yourself. Isn't that how all the current pro gamers did it?
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On September 13 2011 04:47 Masq wrote:
if playing starcraft gets you this depressed, you should probably quit anyway.
Sometimes there are extenuating circumstances.
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1600 Posts
Kind of seems like a troll blog.
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On September 13 2011 03:28 OmiDeLta wrote:
And don't tell me anything about lessons. ONE lesson with the amazing Incontrol, as godly as he is, is not going to change anything - I'm a KID, I can't afford his rates forever.
Why does it have to be Inc giving the lesson? Seems like every day there's a new masters level player who wants to help out lower level players for free. Start finding people to mentor you. Maybe they're not playing on EG or Dignitas, but if they're better than you, then there's something you can learn.
I mean, if you really want to give up, go for it. I just think you're letting yourself off easy if you do.
Nothing worth having is going to come easy. If you don't learn that lesson now, and learn how to get back up and break down the brick wall that's keeping you from what you want, you're going to end up under the bed with the cats.
I don't even know who you are, but come on...Get up.
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Well OP, you are learning a valuable life lesson here. It's good that you have finally come to grips with reality and you know that a silver player will never be pro. I was master from the very first time I started playing this game, and I know it would be nearly impossible for me to make it as a pro.
Growing old, maturing, is all about leaving behind your cherished delusions and hopes and dreams. Picture yourself 40 years old, sitting in a cubicle 9 hours a day, nearly every day for the rest of your life. You are trying to pay off your mortgage, but it will take a couple more decades, and you are already balding, and your wife, if you were lucky enough to snag a decent one, is starting to really put on the pounds.
Keeping a more probable dream in your head like this one will help you to avoid disappointment in life. And after you've had this thoroughly depressing dream in your head long enough, you will start to realize that any obsession, even completely pointless ones like starcraft, is better than focusing on reality or the future.
Then again, I'm a unipolar depressive, descended from unipolar depressives, so that might just be me 
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On September 13 2011 04:59 jdseemoreglass wrote:Well OP, you are learning a valuable life lesson here. It's good that you have finally come to grips with reality and you know that a silver player will never be pro. I was master from the very first time I started playing this game, and I know it would be nearly impossible for me to make it as a pro. Growing old, maturing, is all about leaving behind your cherished delusions and hopes and dreams. Picture yourself 40 years old, sitting in a cubicle 9 hours a day, nearly every day for the rest of your life. You are trying to pay off your mortgage, but it will take a couple more decades, and you are already balding, and your wife, if you were lucky enough to snag a decent one, is starting to really put on the pounds. Keeping a more probable dream in your head like this one will help you to avoid disappointment in life. And after you've had this thoroughly depressing dream in your head long enough, you will start to realize that any obsession, even completely pointless ones like starcraft, is better than focusing on reality or the future. Then again, I'm a unipolar depressive, descended from unipolar depressives, so that might just be me
I have a gift for you, from now on. If any one asks you about dreams. You should
"heh,"
*looks into the horizon*[FACED AWAY FROM THE PERSON TALKING TO YOU] (THIS IS IMPORTANT)
"I save those things for when I am sleeping"
in a badass voice. It'll make you a real character =D
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On September 13 2011 05:02 Blasterion wrote:Show nested quote +On September 13 2011 04:59 jdseemoreglass wrote:Well OP, you are learning a valuable life lesson here. It's good that you have finally come to grips with reality and you know that a silver player will never be pro. I was master from the very first time I started playing this game, and I know it would be nearly impossible for me to make it as a pro. Growing old, maturing, is all about leaving behind your cherished delusions and hopes and dreams. Picture yourself 40 years old, sitting in a cubicle 9 hours a day, nearly every day for the rest of your life. You are trying to pay off your mortgage, but it will take a couple more decades, and you are already balding, and your wife, if you were lucky enough to snag a decent one, is starting to really put on the pounds. Keeping a more probable dream in your head like this one will help you to avoid disappointment in life. And after you've had this thoroughly depressing dream in your head long enough, you will start to realize that any obsession, even completely pointless ones like starcraft, is better than focusing on reality or the future. Then again, I'm a unipolar depressive, descended from unipolar depressives, so that might just be me I have a gift for you, from now on. If any one asks you about dreams. You should "heh," *looks into the horizon*[FACED AWAY FROM THE PERSON TALKING TO YOU] (THIS IS IMPORTANT) "I save those things for when I am sleeping" in a badass voice. It'll make you a real character =D
*looks to the horizon, face away from you.
*badass voice:
"But sleep is the cousin of death."
+ Show Spoiler +Did I do it right?
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On September 13 2011 03:28 OmiDeLta wrote:
I give up. Completely. Demoted down to rank 50 in silver; I'll be bronze before long. I haven't had a win since...well since as long as I can remember. My initial placement was gold. I can't even vent about the terrans here because certain people keep harassing me about it. They know who they are.
So I give up. No more. It was a dumb dream to begin with. As if Dignitas would ever accept someone like me. I'll just live out my NEET life with my parents and eventually drop dead of some weird complication stemming from one of my many conditions. I'm done. I thought I had some shred of talent - I didn't. Feh. No dreams of mine come true; why did I think this one could. Man I can't do ANYTHING right. No trust me it's true. If you know me, you know, I can't do A-NY-THING correctly.
And don't tell me anything about lessons. ONE lesson with the amazing Incontrol, as godly as he is, is not going to change anything - I'm a KID, I can't afford his rates forever.
Dream shattered. This was my last resort seeing as with the...well, way I am, I can't get a proper job. I'll be under the bed. Hiding. With the cats. You can come talk to me if you want, but only if you bring food...I am very, very hungry.
Currently listening to: "Bad Apple!!"
You all know where that song's from...
...This blog had better not be labeled too short!!!
I see that way to often. What I mean is your entirely results focused. All that seems to matter to you is external results: wins, losses, rank, league, etc. Yes, at some point you do have to start caring about results, because to win tourneys you have to, well....win.
But unless your already a really high masters player or GM you shouldn't be results focused. You should be process focused. Sometimes while trying to make improvements to your game you actually get worse for a while. For instance, when I wanted to re-tool my hot keys in BW for better control I was significantly worse overall for a while. I'd constantly hit the wrong hot keys and select the wrong groups, resulting in laughable fails and mis-controls. Was I upset? Hell No. Angry? Hell No. Why would I be, I was improving a critical aspect and I could notice it getting better. Who gave a shit if I mis-controlled and lost a game, I wasn't trying to win; I was practicing a certain aspect of my play so I could be even better once I had it down.
Same thing when I first needed to learn macro. Thats all I focused on: macro, macro, macro. If I couldn't defend reaver harass and lost all my probes because I was giving 100% commitment to ensuring low money and constant probes that was OK. I was working on improving my weaknesses. Once I internalized the good habits, I was both solid at macro AND able to defend harass, since macroing had become so internalized.
When you get results oriented its stupid, because you lose focus on what your actually trying to work on. To me it sounds like you could go play a game where your trying to macro well, keep your money under 300 the whole game, and then be mad because you lost. Insane.
I honestly don't understand the (seemingly reasonably large) group of people for whom winning seems to play into the enjoyment of the game. Playing the game is fun, not winning or losing. It's crazy to me that people actually get worked up/lose interest/etc. because they have bad streaks.
Especially if your playing to get better, winning or losing shouldn't mean anything, if your making progress on the specific parts of your game that you want to improve is what should matter.
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On September 13 2011 03:28 OmiDeLta wrote:
Demoted down to rank 50 in silver
lol. ur bad bro.
User was banned for this post.
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On September 13 2011 05:13 stilez wrote:lol. ur bad bro.
Like I hadn't figured that out?
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On September 13 2011 05:13 stilez wrote:
On September 13 2011 03:28 OmiDeLta wrote
Demoted down to rank 50 in silver
lol. ur bad bro. like really damn bad.
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No one should ever even ponder the idea of playing a game, regardless of what kind of game it is (physical or otherwise), as a career unless they are already playing at a relatively high level.
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On September 13 2011 05:05 jdseemoreglass wrote:Show nested quote +On September 13 2011 05:02 Blasterion wrote:On September 13 2011 04:59 jdseemoreglass wrote:Well OP, you are learning a valuable life lesson here. It's good that you have finally come to grips with reality and you know that a silver player will never be pro. I was master from the very first time I started playing this game, and I know it would be nearly impossible for me to make it as a pro. Growing old, maturing, is all about leaving behind your cherished delusions and hopes and dreams. Picture yourself 40 years old, sitting in a cubicle 9 hours a day, nearly every day for the rest of your life. You are trying to pay off your mortgage, but it will take a couple more decades, and you are already balding, and your wife, if you were lucky enough to snag a decent one, is starting to really put on the pounds. Keeping a more probable dream in your head like this one will help you to avoid disappointment in life. And after you've had this thoroughly depressing dream in your head long enough, you will start to realize that any obsession, even completely pointless ones like starcraft, is better than focusing on reality or the future. Then again, I'm a unipolar depressive, descended from unipolar depressives, so that might just be me I have a gift for you, from now on. If any one asks you about dreams. You should "heh," *looks into the horizon*[FACED AWAY FROM THE PERSON TALKING TO YOU] (THIS IS IMPORTANT) "I save those things for when I am sleeping" in a badass voice. It'll make you a real character =D *looks to the horizon, face away from you. *badass voice: "But sleep is the cousin of death." + Show Spoiler +Did I do it right?
but the way your character works, you have to not speak as if death is a bad thing.
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I must ask, how often were you playing?
You should know that you'll need to play for at least 8-10 hours a day at first if you wanna go pro.
If you're unable to do that (it's pretty hard) then I wouldn't put yourself down, it's definitely not for everyone.
If your Protoss and need some help improving your game, hit me up at Shaw.855 on NA, or get at me on MSN at skfighting@hotmail.com and I can help you out.
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Maybe you should start focusing on doing things right instead of thinking you do everything wrong?
You cant expect to become good in a short period of time and since you were placed in gold and getting demoted thereafter there's nothing to feel bad about.
My buddy got placed in silver then demoted to bronze and played around aprox 200 games then got promoted and this was his first RTS game ever.
Feeling sorry for yourself is not going to help you at all, you have to lose to improve and everytime you lose by something make sure it doesn't happen again or try to prevent it.
good luck!!
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EPT![[image loading]](http://i.imgur.com/w61LU.jpg)
